Made an ass of myself,and had a jolly good time doing it!


sorabji.com: What have you done?: Made an ass of myself,and had a jolly good time doing it!
THIS IS A READ-ONLY ARCHIVE FROM THE SORABJI.COM MESSAGE BOARDS (1995-2016).

By Czarina on Friday, June 8, 2001 - 06:33 pm:

    Somehow,this gives me a great sense of pleasure.

    It is flooding here.My property doesn't flood,[never has],but the gravel road leading to my property does.About once a year I get flooded in for a couple of days.I usually kind of look forward to it,kinda like a little vacation.

    Its doing some serious raining,and I knew I would have to make provisions,but I had pressing business in town this am,plus was suspossed to work last night.I knew if I got out last night,I wouldn't be able to get back in this morning.

    So I worked last night,took care of my business this am,then did something I've always wanted to do,but forget about,untill it floods again.

    I went to Walmart,and bought the biggest 4 man blow up boat I could find.And then accessorized with a plethora of tacky,but useful items.It was great.

    I bought brightly colored rain ponchos in 4 different colors.I lucked out and found something I'de never seen before,but couldn't pass up.Mosquito head nets.Kinda like beekeeper headwear.I bought 4 head-band flashlight things[like miners wear].I went to the toy dept,and bought 4 pirate hats,and 1 Gilligan type hat,[in case I had a non-compliant family member,who might have too much pride to wear the pirate hats].
    I bought 4 oars,and 2 big brightly colored umbrellas to stick in the fishing pole holders.A whistle on a bright flourescent yellow cord to wear around my neck,and a big compass,to aid in my navigation.A six pack of beer,and a bunch of banannas.Then I was ready.

    It was great.Our rowing skills were sadly lacking,but we were so busy admiring our "boating wear",that we didn't mind too much that we weren't making much headway.At one point,my daughter refused to wear her pirate hat,to which my response was,"This is a R******** family adventure,and you're making us look like fools,by not wearing your hat.If you don't put it back on,I'll blow my whistle all the way through the neighborhood."She complied.

    I called "AHOY" to all my neighbors as we passed.

    Life just don't get much better than this.


By wisper on Friday, June 8, 2001 - 06:40 pm:

    awesome.

    pics?????

    makes me want to live in flood country.


By Dougie on Friday, June 8, 2001 - 06:44 pm:

    That's great, Czarina! When I first bought my boat, I bought a captain's hat and had a t-shirt that said "Master Yachtsman" with pictures of sailboats on it, and has a quote from the bible on it, "Even the winds and the waves obey him" and when we first took it out, I'd salute everybody going by. She sat down in the cabin until I took the hat off.


By Czarina on Friday, June 8, 2001 - 07:21 pm:

    I'll get some pics and post them.I am off the next two days,and we are eagerly watching for road closeures,as we plan to try to improve our "boating skills".

    I'm still wearing my whistle.I like it.But I don't get to wear it tomorrow.They said I "was a little out of control with it",so I have to let someone else have a turn.I knew there would be a problem,when I only bought one whistle.But if you have more than one whistle,it sort of defeats its purpose.


By Platypus on Saturday, June 9, 2001 - 12:57 pm:

    Wow, that's hilarious. We definetly need pictures...


By agatha on Saturday, June 9, 2001 - 01:48 pm:

    I love that story.


By semillama on Saturday, June 9, 2001 - 04:13 pm:

    That is so awesome. That is exactly how to deal with minor natural disasters. Kind of reminds me, we had a lot of rain the last few weeks and often parts of our site would be flooded aboutu a foot deep. I knew this was bumming out the crew so I bought a set of thos ebrightly colored little plastic boats and floated them out onto the little ponds on the site. Worked good for morale, but those damn boats actually sank!


By moonit on Saturday, June 9, 2001 - 08:10 pm:

    I wonder if the river ever flooded if me and the boy and the two cats could do that.

    Troll wouldnt want to wear a hat tho.

    And I bet I wouldnt be allowed the whistle.



By Spider on Sunday, June 10, 2001 - 12:19 am:

    I love you, Czarina.


By Czarina on Sunday, June 10, 2001 - 12:22 pm:

    We're going back out today,and I'll bring the digital camera,so I can get some pics and post them.

    We went out yesterday,and we quickly learned that our rowing skills weren't just sadly lacking,they were non-existant.

    We had to incorporate the aid of 2 sticks,[one part of a mop,and the other,a piece of pvc pipe].
    This helped our momentum,but we still had trouble navigating.We can't seem to get coordinated,and tend to spin in circles.[this is where the beer came in handy].

    But we're nothing if not tenacious,so we will continue in our efforts.

    [this is kinda sad,but I'm kinda hoping that at least one of my friends gets flooded in,so we can go and rescue them.I should be ashamed for thinking that.]

    Also,if we can ever get our skills together,and quit bumping into trees and stuff,I want to add a perch,so I can bring my favorite parrot,Buster,as I think this will tie in nicely with the pirate theme.


By Czarina on Sunday, June 10, 2001 - 04:50 pm:

    Help!
    I took some pics,and we look even more ridiculous than I originally anticipated.

    But I am having trouble saving the pics,to give them a link to click on.

    However,I can send them as a postcard.If someone wouldn't mind me sending them,maybe they could then post them for me?

    If so email me your address,and I'll send them.


By J on Wednesday, June 13, 2001 - 02:37 pm:

    You know I can't do it or I'd post some myself,but send me a postcard,sounds hillarious.


By Nate on Wednesday, June 13, 2001 - 05:20 pm:

    you can just send them to me. i don't know what i can do with them.


By Nate on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 12:24 am:


By Nate on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 12:26 am:

    i don't know how long that will last.


By Czarina on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 12:38 am:

    Thank you,Nate.


By Nate on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 12:55 am:

    you look like crazy freaks, btw.


By Czarina on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 01:16 am:

    Ya,that was the fun part of it.
    It's imperative to accessorize properly.


By Cat on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 01:32 am:

    "She accessorized properly"

    I want that on my gravestone.


By J on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 01:35 am:

    I clicked it,it said access forbidden from external host?????


By Nate on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 02:25 am:

    i get that now too.
    hmm


By Spunkrat on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 08:22 am:

    so do i


By patrick on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 11:44 am:

    so fix it


By Nate on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 11:54 am:

    fuck off.


By patrick on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 12:23 pm:

    jerk off

    why cant we see them? spare me the technical whohaw.

    czarina, send them to me, i'll make a page with them.


By Czarina on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 12:56 pm:

    Thanks Patrick! They're on their way!


By droopy on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 01:02 pm:

    i got "access forbidden" the first couple of times, and then on the third it allowed me to save the picture. i set it as wallpaper.


By patrick on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 01:13 pm:

    czarina, send me simple jpgs, that postcard format is unknown to me and my machine.




    wanna read something hilarious?


    we get local weekly publications from all over...and in last weeks Portland Mercury there is a hilarious article here


By Nate on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 01:22 pm:

    the post card format is a zip file. the jpg can be found within it.


By patrick on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 01:39 pm:

    fuck it...the only (un) zip (er) program i have is PK Zip and its not wanting to anythign for me. I had netzip on the my old PC.

    sorry czarina, im not technically skilled enough to tweek with this. if i had simple jpg files, i could upload them to a page in no time...assuming homestead isnt giving me a hard time


By droopy on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 01:46 pm:

    i have it as a jpg.


By patrick on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 01:46 pm:

    fuck


    i really want to see these.


By patrick on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 01:47 pm:

    from the link above...yes its a jpg, but she is emailing me rdz files...my 'puter doesnt know what to do with the them, the only expander i have doesnt like or want these files.


By Czarina on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 01:52 pm:

    You made me laugh Droop.
    Patrick,I'll try a couple of other ways.I'll email it to one of my email addresses,and then try forwarding it to you.
    I'll also try to save it in my documents,and then maybe you'll be able to access it.


By Nate on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 01:53 pm:

    rename the file .zip


By Czarina on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 01:54 pm:

    me?


By patrick on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 02:02 pm:

    ok, got it


By patrick on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 02:19 pm:


By patrick on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 02:20 pm:

    what is particularly funny...is the second boat pictures...the bird bath is eloquently "placed" above your heard. they look like they are eating your brains.


By Spunkrat on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 02:33 pm:

    cool


By Czarina on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 02:40 pm:

    Thank you Patrick!

    The second boat pic didn't come through.The one where they are eating my brains.

    The last 2 pics are of our Mexico trip.J wouldn't let me take any pics of her,but I snuck one of her ass.If she says "okay" I'll send it to Patrick to post.


By patrick on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 02:54 pm:

    hit reaload czarina. homestead webpage software needs coaxing sometime.

    come on J!!!!!


By Czarina on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 03:02 pm:

    I got it!Thanks again Patrick,I really appreciate it.

    I sent you something funny in your email.


By semillama on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 04:56 pm:

    that's fantastic!


By Dougie on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 06:52 pm:

    Pretty cool, Czarina. I dig that mosaic tile entranceway -- I take it that's your front door?


By Czarina on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 07:21 pm:

    Actually,thats where J was staying.She had a really neat shower,too,with mosaic work,I got some pics in there,but their content wouldn't be appropriate for posting.


By Dougie on Thursday, June 14, 2001 - 07:27 pm:

    Sure they would. Anything goes here.


By patrick on Friday, June 15, 2001 - 11:21 am:

    god damn it.


    don't tell us about scandelous pictures only not to post them!!!!

    J, czarina send them to me...i'll put them some place private. and will only email those you wish to show.


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