Makin bacon, part dieux


sorabji.com: What have you done?: Makin bacon, part dieux
THIS IS A READ-ONLY ARCHIVE FROM THE SORABJI.COM MESSAGE BOARDS (1995-2016).

By Spider on Thursday, April 10, 2003 - 00:10 pm:

    For Dougie. Hey, Dougie, looks like I'm the only one who cares about you around here. Remember that when it's time to write your will.





    By patrick on Thursday, April 10, 2003 - 11:55 pm:
    god damn i love this new detergent we are using.

    i smell my baby on me all day long which leads me to remember the smell of her sweet baby breath.

    this morning, while mom slept a little longer, she and i layed in bed, talked, looked each other over and pooted for each other.



    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    By kazoo on Thursday, April 10, 2003 - 00:07 pm:
    this cuteness is killing me

    hello little milkdud...you don't know me, but I am one of your fans from around the world...we're so happy you've finally arrived.


By Spider on Thursday, April 10, 2003 - 00:10 pm:

    Now everybody else, write here.


By patrick on Thursday, April 10, 2003 - 00:52 pm:

    no!


    pffffft.

    i refuse to acknowledge the legitimacy of this thread.


By Spider on Thursday, April 10, 2003 - 01:25 pm:

    See, Dougie, see what kind of respect you get around here? You're nothing to these cold-hearted bastards, but I loves ya, baby. Yes, I do.


By agatha on Thursday, April 10, 2003 - 07:23 pm:

    So, Patrick, tell us about your little baby.

    Here.

    As opposed to there.

    (I've done my part...)


By Dougie on Friday, April 11, 2003 - 10:57 am:

    Thanks Spider. You're a sweetheart. I love you too. True, I don't get much respect around here, but that's ok, I'm used to it. I used to sob myself to sleep every night about it, but beer and horse tranquilizers have helped to ease the pain.

    (BTW, did you change "two" (deux) into "gods" (dieux) on purpose?)


By sarah on Friday, April 11, 2003 - 11:04 pm:


    ewwwww. let's hope not.





By Spider on Friday, April 11, 2003 - 11:07 pm:

    Nope, I just can't spell in French.


    This has made me think....in Italian, God is Dio, but I don't know the word for "gods." "Dii" would be silly. I need to look this up.


By Spider on Friday, April 11, 2003 - 11:22 pm:

    I know you're just dying to know the answer!

    I called my dad and asked him -- it's "dei" (it's irregular).


By sarah on Friday, April 11, 2003 - 11:23 pm:

    dei-o
    dei-o

    daylight come and me wan go home





By Dougie on Friday, April 11, 2003 - 00:05 pm:

    Hmm, that's weird. Then would "Agnus Dei" be "lamb of gods"?


By Spider on Friday, April 11, 2003 - 00:14 pm:

    No, that's different -- that's the Latin possessive case. It's still singular.


By Dougie on Friday, April 11, 2003 - 00:21 pm:

    Damn, I wish I would've taken Latin in school.

    Now I've got to put my mind to learning Spanish. I've got one of those CDs to learn it on the computer somewhere around here. Must dig it out. The guy has a voice that's deeper than James Earl Jones on it. Tough to teach an old dog new languages though.


By kazoo on Friday, April 11, 2003 - 00:44 pm:

    Hey! I love Dougie! I'm the one who wanted a pull-string Dougie doll!

    Did you ever get to the Dinosaur in Syracuse?


By Dougie on Friday, April 11, 2003 - 01:08 pm:

    Thanks kazoo! Yes, we got to the Dinosaur, and it was awesome! I ate so much I could hardly walk after it. That place is a must for anybody going to Syracuse. The week I was there, the place was crazed about the basketball tournament, and rightly so. Did you watch the finals on Monday? It was a great game, but very sloppy in the 2nd half, but exciting nonetheless. That high school phenom in Ohio, Lebron James, says that he's friends with Carmello Anthony of Syracuse and that he's not necessarily decided to go directly to the pros, and that he might join Syracuse. Now that would be something to see!


By kazoo on Friday, April 11, 2003 - 01:17 pm:

    I actually missed the game, but I am thrilled that they won. I was there the last time they made it that far and wow...what a party.


By sarah on Friday, April 11, 2003 - 04:19 pm:

    i've been asked out on a date for sunday evening. i don't know why i've agreed. i'm a sadomasochist. i can barely hope it will be even remotely less humiliating than any other date i've had in the last year. or ever.




By sarah on Friday, April 11, 2003 - 04:21 pm:


    eri, i can't come for your birthday. if it's this weekend, i'm having a yard sale tomorrow and i gotta sell my old car this weekend too. if it's next weekend, i'm volunteering for a BBBS event. not going to houston as originally planned.

    happy birthday, and i hope you have a great time! we will get together one of these days!





By kazoo on Friday, April 11, 2003 - 04:31 pm:

    Is this with glenn?

    It was a year ago on Sunday when Sem took me on the date which would make me regret telling him that I only wanted to be friends. I can't believe we've been together for a year. That is pretty incredible considering my sad history with dating and long distance relationships.

    And now the truth comes out:

    In a few weeks it will be a year since I discovered these boards (on my own) and started reading with amazement everything that was being said about me. Imagine dating someone new and having access to all that stuff...yeah it was pretty fucked up.


By eri on Friday, April 11, 2003 - 04:48 pm:

    It's next weekend, but that's cool. It looks like we are going to be transferred again, soon. Like in the next month (If I had to guess).

    We'll have fun. I haven't been dancing (where I wasn't getting hit on constantly by drunk, butch women) in a LONG time, so it will be fun. That is, as long as I don't have to listen to her praise the jerk she got back together with.

    Kazoo, my husband was posting here for over a year before I stumbled across it, and looking back at some of the stuff he said, well, I understand completely. We are approaching our 7 year marker of our first date later this month! 7 years, damn it seems like longer!!!!

    I am hyped. I get my birtday present tonight. The whole family is going to have to stay up and watch it with me until I am tired of it! It will probably be on my television at least once a day until the end of summer! I am such a nut!


By kazoo on Friday, April 11, 2003 - 04:51 pm:

    Happy Birthday Eri! Woo-hoo!


By eri on Friday, April 11, 2003 - 05:11 pm:

    Thanks Kazoo. My birthday isn't until the 20th. I have just decided that since this is my last birthday prior to hitting 30, I am going to celebrate for at least a week!!!! hehe.

    I can't remember what Sem told me, but how long are you going to be in Atlanta? We were told it is the closest big city to where we are being transferred to. I might have to bug you to come visit instead of Sarah!


By kazoo on Friday, April 11, 2003 - 10:59 pm:

    Neat-o. I'll be in Ohio this summer but otherwise, I will be in Atlanta for the next four years at least. And I will have a car soon. Where exactly are you being transferred to?


By dave. on Saturday, April 12, 2003 - 11:21 am:

    kazoo, is "marriage" important to you?


By kazoo on Saturday, April 12, 2003 - 00:27 am:

    Not in any conventional sense. Why?


By dave. on Saturday, April 12, 2003 - 01:50 am:

    aw, hell.

    some thing sparked that question but i can't remember what that thing was.

    maybe it'll return later.

    sweet release -- my mind slips away.


By sarah on Saturday, April 12, 2003 - 02:06 am:

    yes, with glenn. but actually it's glen. i'm not sure if
    there's a difference. only sheila would know.

    tomorrow is the yard sale. four blondes, four estates,
    free cookies. it's all taking place at my house. tonight
    jules, marrilee, and i drank a LOT of various alchologic
    beverages, made signs to nail up arond the
    neighborhood in the morning, and priced our junk and
    linstened to the ninja tune CD and belly danced in the
    dining room. they and autumn will arrive around 7:30
    on the morning with the rest of their stuff and we'll drink
    mimosas, eat chocolate covered espresso beans, and
    set everything up and get ready for a rock n roll yard
    sale.

    all four of us are dressing in costumes. marrilee and
    jules will be doing real fire spinning, i'm going to hula
    hoop, and autumn will be DJing.



    i am not making this up.



    sunday evening is my date with glen. glen was way
    over the top fliring with me the night before which took
    me by surprise. the other two times we met he was
    slightly aloof, but we were in bigger social gatherings.
    last night was intimate. he is a flatterer, very sexy. he
    has a five year old girl, Ellie. her mother didn't want to
    marry Glen - she's a republican lawyer, he's a
    democratic business analyst. he's going to call
    tomorrow, and sunday he's taking me on a walk
    through hide park to pick and smell wildflowers. he
    wants to visit my garden.

    i don't know.

    i could like this guy.

    there are so many frogs, and just a rare few that make it
    interesting, that make it hard to sleep at night. he's one
    of those.



By patrick on Saturday, April 12, 2003 - 02:17 am:

    do you remember when "fingering" was in?


    when it was an act of its on.

    "did you finger her?"

    sounds crude now, but at one point in time, it had its merit, it was a notable notch on the bed post.

    finger.


    remember that?


By patrick on Saturday, April 12, 2003 - 01:14 pm:

    sorry bout that.


By patrick on Thursday, May 20, 2004 - 07:15 pm:

    just when you thought she couldnt get any cuter


By patrick on Thursday, May 20, 2004 - 07:19 pm:

    oh and J. I havent forgot about pics of the sweet outfit you sent her. It was actually on the big size, which is a good thing, so in a month or two, it will be a perfect fit. When she does don it, pics forthcoming.


By Spider on Thursday, May 20, 2004 - 07:20 pm:

    Aw!

    Patrick, what's the deal with that website? Do you have to pay? Do you just create an account and then upload your photos, or is it more involved?


By patrick on Thursday, May 20, 2004 - 07:25 pm:

    yeah. it takes all of 5 seconds to create an account and its free.


By patrick on Thursday, May 20, 2004 - 07:25 pm:

    ohhh ohhh spider pics on the way?


    i've been waiting 5 years for this.


By Spider on Thursday, May 20, 2004 - 08:20 pm:

    Dude, how many times have I told you, I am plain-looking. Don't set yourself up for disappointment.


By J on Thursday, May 20, 2004 - 08:20 pm:

    I can wait:)


By patrick on Thursday, May 20, 2004 - 08:23 pm:

    dude, how many times i have told YOU to stop downplaying your attraction quotient.

    you gotta respect that fact that you can show me a pic of a horses ass, say it was you, and id crush over you regardless.


    so on with spider.


By Spider on Thursday, May 20, 2004 - 08:41 pm:

    Thanks. You're not too far off. :)

    Anyway, I've given the directions for that site to my friend with the digital camera, so you may soon be seeing a horse's ass me.


By heather on Thursday, May 20, 2004 - 09:28 pm:

    can we all see? please?


By kazu on Thursday, May 20, 2004 - 09:56 pm:

    me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too! me too!

    you've seen ME!


By Spider on Friday, May 21, 2004 - 12:12 am:

    Damn, people.

    I'll see what I can do.


By Antigone on Friday, May 21, 2004 - 03:40 pm:

    There is no try. Only do.

    Let's see the goods!


By moonit on Friday, May 21, 2004 - 08:22 pm:

    and me and me and me and me and me and me and me and meand me and me and me and me and me and me and me and me and me and me and me and me and me and me and me and me


By Gee on Tuesday, May 25, 2004 - 09:58 am:

    holy cow. no pressure, though, eh?


By Spider on Tuesday, May 25, 2004 - 11:14 am:

    Riiiiiight.


By sarah on Tuesday, May 25, 2004 - 04:42 pm:


    patrick, your baby girl is so beautiful it almost hurts to look at her.


    i thought i wanted to have babies until my sister had her first baby 3 weeks ago. i talked to her on the phone a few days a week, and oh the horror stories. she said she can't wait to go back to work. work will seem like being on vacation to her compared to what she's doing now. i mean, she loves it, but wow. i mean, wow. i'm finally grokking the seriousness of it. how much it changes every little itsy bitsy thing about your life.

    i mean, i can barely handle my commute to work.







By patrick on Tuesday, May 25, 2004 - 06:14 pm:

    thanks. i couldnt agree more.

    im surprised at such a sentiment from a new mother.

    don't let your sister freak you out about it. its not that overwhelming.


By kazu on Tuesday, May 25, 2004 - 06:21 pm:

    my cousin was like that for about a month until she settled into a groove. it helps that she has one of those no-crying babies.


By patrick on Tuesday, May 25, 2004 - 06:33 pm:

    yeah. also...at this stage, there's not a lot of give and take between parents and child. its all give. hell, they barely have eyesight. once the baby can respond to the parents and other stimuli, its gets a lot harder to get up and go to work on some days. especially when they're tugging at your jeans, saying 'dah dah dah dah dah dah dah dah' over and over and ultimately breaking down the minute the door shuts. or when they start smiling and laughing at your bafoonery. If anything, the hardest part, at least for nico, was to even consider work. I look back at those first few dream-like months with fondness. Cause now, its like, dude, kid, eat your effing peas already and stop throwing them on the floor. Cusp of toddler-ism.

    eva was never even close to being a colic baby, so yeah, I can imagine how one of those would effect your psyche. i saw a bit on the history channel this weekend about a common military interrogation technique is to play a tape loop of a baby crying for hours on end. as a new parent, you are already running on mojo juice for the first few months, add incessant crying to the mix...man.

    but colic doesnt really show itself until a few of months of life.

    yeah. im betting your sister will have a different outlook very soon.


By kazu on Tuesday, May 25, 2004 - 06:43 pm:

    I was a no-crying baby. So much so that my aunt told my mother that she didn't know what it was like to be a new mother. I also never got sick and had my first sick doctor appointment when I was six. That turned out to be a bad thing.

    of course, then she had Kevin. Know what Kevin's security blanket was? My mother's lip. Seriously, he would hold onto her lip when she held him and not let go until he feel asleep. Eventually, he outgrew that, but still...strange. He would also cry if anyone but my mother held him.


By Spider on Tuesday, May 25, 2004 - 06:49 pm:

    I didn't cry a lot, but neither did I sleep at night. Nor did my brother. So my parents went nearly 4 years without a decent night's sleep, and my mom has said that was the reason they didn't have any more kids. They couldn't take the sleep deprivation.


By patrick on Tuesday, May 25, 2004 - 07:18 pm:

    hey by the way....sorabji parents....ive been meaning ask.

    were your kids always twitchy when trying to be put down?

    im really trying to eva on a sleep structure and she's proving a little difficult. In general, she sleeps at night well, once she's asleep. Sometimes, however, getting her to sleep a little more tough.

    Sometimes, when its so apparent she exhausted and approaching a meltdown, she twitches and kicks squirms. sometimes i have to gently hold her still, despite her protests, so she can give herself a chance to fall asleep. lately, the worst is, when she wakes up 5,6am-ish and she comes in the bed with us. even though she needs another hour of sleep, sometimes she its such a squirmy tyke...taking to even trying to stand on her head, for real. she kicks, lays on her belly and the props herself up only to drop like some silly wrestler. literally, both of us have bruises from this kid and her thrashings.

    the paranoid in me wonders if this is indicative of some sort of.....i dont know what. but im just wondering if other parents had to do this at times with their kids. that is super cuddle them to get them to sleep/



    and kazu...eva does that. she grabs for your face. jams a finger your nose, pinches your lips, digs her nails into cheek when she's falling asleep.


    i understand you parents spider. the sleep deprivation can strain any marital relationship. and it certainly did ours. you arent as rational as you want to be at 3am on 2 hours sleep. its easy to fuck up and say the wrong thing in those times.


By TBone on Tuesday, May 25, 2004 - 07:50 pm:

    My little brother was a wiggler when he was tired. Still is, to some extent. It's like short-term hyperactivity. The dopamine level drops when you're tired, and that manifests itself as the wiggles in some people.


By Lapis on Wednesday, May 26, 2004 - 04:41 am:

    I remember getting wiggly at piano lessons in elementary school and having time out to shake the sillies out.


By semillama on Wednesday, May 26, 2004 - 09:48 am:

    Hey Patrick,


    Does Eva have really fine hair? it just seems like she doesn't have much, but I figured that was an illusion due to fine hair.



    For the record, I was a good baby as well.


    My brother was a demon. Watch out for the second child!


By Gee on Wednesday, May 26, 2004 - 11:03 am:

    I find the story of Kazu's brother holding onto his mom's lip to be hilarious. Just wanted to add that.


By Kalli on Wednesday, May 26, 2004 - 12:57 pm:

    Patrick! Why do you have to put the kid down? Aren't there alternatives? There's plenty of rescues in the LA area that'll take her and find her a good home. But don't put her down! You unhumane ass.



    (eh, no coffee = bad funny)


By patrick on Wednesday, May 26, 2004 - 01:11 pm:

    sem, she does have fine hair, but she also short on hair. her mom didnt have a full head of hair until she was 2 years old. its turning out though to be a gorgeous chestnut brown that beams red in bright sun.


    im positive there wont be a second child.


By kazu on Wednesday, May 26, 2004 - 01:15 pm:

    Actually, Kalli coming from you, it was rather amusing. Of course, I haven't had any caffeine yet either.

    The thing with my brother, is that he just held on to her lip, he didn't poke and scratch, he grabbed the lip and held on, until he fell asleep. And only with my mother. It was, literally, his security blanket.

    And guess which one of the Simzoo Siblings gots attachment issues?


By kazu on Wednesday, May 26, 2004 - 01:16 pm:

    Actually, that isn't literal, is it? The security part is, but not the blanket part.

    I needs me some tea.


By TBone on Thursday, May 27, 2004 - 12:41 pm:

    I was a good child until about 3. I got a little brother. The two of us terrorized our parents for two years until they divorced. Then we both went introvert. But we didn't cause the divorce, and I don't think the divorce caused the personality change.


By patrick on Friday, June 4, 2004 - 01:31 pm:

    omeone recently said (regarding my daughter) "she has no business being that cute".

    in fact, i think it was sem. though, it was said to me, via kazu. good assertion sem.

    2 nights ago i was working the darkroom on some images i snapped of her this weekend. they are prolific to me. i dont use that lightly. i only wish i had a scanner so I could show you. I found myself, repeatedly saying outloud to myself "oh my god". I was and continue to be at awe at her beauty. well, i took a digital image of the proofsheets, just so i could share. they came out darker and generally shitty, but the content still comes through reasonably well.

    Now I admit, her mother, has the better looks. But at the same time, i can be put my modesty aside and admit that though Im no knock out, im dont have a butta face either.

    Last night i thought about the impact I will have on her, being photographed so much. Will she ever resent me in some unforseen aspect? I need to read more about Sally Mann and her kids. She photographed them all the time, even in the buff, when they were kids....as in 5-10 years old. Now of course many people in the art world and outside of it were disturbed by these images, equating them to child porn and what not. Of course they were anything but. But we all know, people like to apply their own hang ups and predispositions to other people, especially other people's art.

    http://www.sallymann.org/index-1.html

    No i have an Aperture quarterly issue in which Jesse (one of Sally's daughters) recalls her experiences in a very favorable light. kalli, recently shared that she was/is friends with Jesse Mann has iterated as much. That it was no big deal. But I suspect that has a lot do with the fact that the camera and mom were there all the time. Shooting 8x10 format photography is time consuming, meticulus process. Those cameras can weight up to 50lbs. Getting the exposure takes several reads. In otherwords. Her kids had to pose and pose for many many minutes at a time. Its not like 35mm photography.

    My thoughts also led me to the idea that perhaps she will become a model or actress of some sort. In other words, using her beauty to cash in. But then again, she has proven, repeatedly to us, she is smart as a fucking tack. Maybe she will gyrate towards a life path of a more cerebral pursuits in which her beauty is arbitrary.

    Am I sounding shallow? I worry about that.

    All i know, and I hope this isnt it a mistake, but her beauty, in her short life thus far has consistently mesmerized me. I expect that to continue (of course right?) I hope this expectations and subsequently the pictures dont ever manifest themself into some sort of complex that hurts her. naturally Id never want that.

    anywhere, here are the few images that have me reeling recently. again, the quality is nothing as it appears here.
    http://www.printroom.com/ViewAlbumPhoto.asp?userid=waffleboy&album_id=179528&image_id=4
    http://www.printroom.com/ViewAlbumPhoto.asp?userid=waffleboy&album_id=179528&image_id=5
    http://www.printroom.com/ViewAlbumPhoto.asp?userid=waffleboy&album_id=179528&image_id=6
    http://www.printroom.com/ViewAlbumPhoto.asp?userid=waffleboy&album_id=179528&image_id=7


By dave. on Friday, June 4, 2004 - 01:43 pm:

    those are awesome. i used to take tons of pictures. TONS! now, i can barely remember to get the camera out. my favorite pictures were the old polaroid camera b/w pics. back when you could still find reasonably priced b/w film.


By kazu on Friday, June 4, 2004 - 01:47 pm:

    My father took TONS of pictures. Now it's my stepfather who takes TONS of pictures. I never resented it, but got appropriately annoyed at the expected ages.


By patrick on Friday, June 4, 2004 - 01:52 pm:

    god damn, the quality is starting to bug me.


    i had a shoot over the weekend and rented this massive flash unit. its highly sophisticated in its light dispersal. no hot spots, even, diffused lighting and it coordinates with my camera in a millisecond as not over, or under expose the image. its a near $1k unit. Thats lost in these particular jpgs. oh well. I shouldnt worry so much.


By wisper on Friday, June 4, 2004 - 08:58 pm:

    Dear partick,
    I hope that if Eva pulls some whack shit on you guys in the future, you find it in your heart to be as creative with punishments as these people are.


    beautiful.


By Spider on Friday, June 4, 2004 - 10:12 pm:

    LET THE YELLING BEGIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


By eri on Saturday, June 5, 2004 - 04:23 pm:

    That form of punishment seems natural after a few years. We do that shit when Hayley gets herself into big trouble (like getting suspended from school). If she yells, we just take something else away. But that doesn't work with Micki cuz she doesn't give a shit about her stuff to care if it is gone or not.


By Gee on Monday, June 7, 2004 - 10:18 am:

    I bet they made that story up.

    like the guy who was selling the wedding dress. all make believe!


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