THIS IS A READ-ONLY ARCHIVE FROM THE SORABJI.COM MESSAGE BOARDS (1995-2016). |
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Basically, the gist of the piece is I'm acknowledging the impact Petrock had on my life and am coming out to those who don't know. Whether or not the Post opts to publish it, I fully plan on making sure everyone in my family and my friends, sees it. Is it a cop out to come out in writing vs. in person? For some reason now seems the right time and this seems like the right way to do it. |
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Are you coming out as a famous person? |
do it anyway and get it over with. i guess i should also say that, if someone were trying to send ME a message via a wapo op-ed, i'd probably never get that message. also, is such a declaration really necessary? i mean, is it like an alcoholic has to make that declaration if they're on the 12-step path to recovery? i'm not comfortable with treating being gay like it's a disease. or maybe it's like if a close friend of mine confided to me that they were a born-again republican, left-behind, mega-church, fundamentalist. i'd be like, whoa, i'm gonna need some time to digest that. i guess some folks still think being gay is as the same as being batshit insane. |
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so what happened to Petrock? how did he die? how old was he? when i first learned he died, it was a shock and a blow. it's surprising to me too, that people in your life don't know you're homosexual. you have a very out personality. i agree with dave too. needing to announce one's sexuality seems weird, in the same way it's weird that people still assume everyone is straight until other evidence interferes with that assumption. anyway, i hope it goes well for you. |
i had no idea about petrock, nor did i have any idea as to his relation to you and im sorry. |
Dave: Whether they do or not isn't the point for me, it's me acknowledging it. I think once I post the piece here it will make more sense. I do have several relations who are right wing "christian catholic" whackos who will probably be aghast, and I agree, fuck em. But I'm tired of pretending for their sake. Czarina: Not a governor of a state. I was once queen for a day though. LOL Dave: Yeah, don't be so mean to batshit. Sarah: He drowned in the ocean while on vacation with his family. He was 43. And trust me, it's still a shock and a blow. |
Do we have an imposter here? |
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If you are Jim, answer this..what are the "supplements" I like so much? |
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:) |
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MUST have my vitamins! |
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Too many *trolls*. I get tired of the nonsensical repetitive posts. I've been trying to check in more often, but seem to have a short attention span, when I do get here. |
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so you better get this party started mazel tov |
Ohhhh Myyyyy.... Damn I luv you Jimbabe Bet you would make an awesome daily vitamin. Vitamin J? |
No, Dani. Vitamin R. Don't ask unless ya really wanna know. ROFLMAO |
Of course I want to know. Spill........ |
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What the fuck is Rimming?? |
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I have no doubt that you are sexier than Kevin Federline. He is a skank ho no-talent fuckwad. |
Gave me a good laugh. |
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Agatha-- thanks for the wikipedia link. Dani-- LOL yeah my explanations are usually more fun. :-P Sem-- ROFL, but I loathe parades. |
http://www.washblade.com/2006/8-25/view/columns/slattery.cfm |
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congratulations jim. poignant and touching. |
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oh god me too |
oh god me too |
oh god me too but i love a good conga line |
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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Conga_line Anti-- :P backatcha :) |
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I've always been proud of you and proud to call you my friend. |
fuckity fuck fuck. blocked at work. |
Laying my cards on the table (Gay) The death of a close friend inspired me to come out to everyone in my life. By JIM SLATTERY Friday, August 25, 2006 THE LIFE AND recent death of one of my closest friends has completely altered the course of mine, and his passing has caused me to rethink the way I live on a much greater scale. I have known I was gay as long as I can remember, even before I knew of the term “gay.” Twenty-five years ago, though, publicly making such an admission was not nearly as “easy” as it is today. Growing up as the fat kid in a dysfunctional family situation was never easy. I had few friends, and the transition from Catholic grade school to public high school was a pure nightmare. But this isn’t about my seeking pity, rather to gain an insight into why the influence of one friend is and remains so great. About a decade ago, I met Pete Deakin online in a D.C. chat forum. Over the course of a year, Pete and I became friends, mostly going to movies and grabbing a bite to eat occasionally. And then in June 1998, Pete invited me to attend D.C.’s Gay Pride parade and festival with him and a friend. I was hesitant. What if someone saw me? What if I was on the news or in the newspaper? Pete prevailed and I went, and I had the best time. I saw that everyone there was just like me. We were people, everyday people, who worked for the government, the phone company, the grocery store or at a law firm. That day, by strong-arming me into going with him to my first Gay Pride, Pete forever changed my life and ultimately gave me the ability to like myself for who I was, and accept myself for what I am — a gay man. WHEN PETE DIED very unexpectedly while on vacation with his family in June, it sent a jolt through his entire circle of friends and co-workers and then through many of our friends, families and co-workers. At the funeral, we met his family, whom he had talked about often but did not see regularly. They were the nicest people. Pete wasn’t out to his family, and perhaps this is why he didn’t visit them more than he did, but I’ve since learned that they knew he was gay. Knowing this, I just cannot possibly remain the Jim Slattery that some people think they know. I am out at work, I am out to some in my family, and the support I have received is what drives my coming out now, to all. I do not want my friends and family to meet at my funeral as Pete’s did. I have awesome friends, straight and gay, and I have a great extended family. Might some of my many cousins or aunts or uncles no longer speak to me? Quite possibly. Does it matter to me? In the short term, sure, but I just cannot let fear of the unknown be the driving factor in my life anymore. Thank you, Pete, for that swift kick toward self-realization eight years ago and now, finally, for helping me lay all my cards on the table. You were a true friend and, though you are gone, that friendship continues to help guide me. Perhaps it always will. |
holy shit that is so, just, fucking great. Jim, not that it matters either way, but you look neither fat nor hairy. i'm impressed in a way i can't even explain. much respect. |
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J-- gracias. Sarah, Thank you. LOL But I am indeed fat and hairy. :) |
J-- gracias. Sarah, Thank you. LOL But I am indeed fat and hairy. :) |
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Listen my friend..I don't know if you read all the info off that web page that Agatha posted but that rimming stuff seems kinda...dangerous. Thoroughly washing the area can help reduce the risk of diseases. Another way to protect against any health risks is by placing a sheet of plastic wrap (or a dental dam) over the anus. This allows the passive partner to receive stimulation while protecting the active partner from bacterial infection. PLASTIC WRAP??? nooooooooooooo thank you. |
I can feel in your words, how much you miss your friend. I am so sorry. Try and remember, in your down times, how fortunate you were to have had this person in your life. That is his gift to you. Great job on the article! |
Czarina-- Much appreciated. |
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My Jimbabe is very sexy. I've been trying to get him to play on my team for YEARS now. No luck though. YET |
:) |
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What a blow! He was so much fun around here. I haven't been here in ages, but I'm sorry to learn such terrible news. Jeesh, he was 2 years younger than me... I've had relatives & family friends dropping like flies over the last year. I go to bed every nite wondering who'll croak next. PyjamaBoy, say whatever you want in yr op-ed piece. There's nothing wrong with coming out in print vs. face to face. And Hi to all you fabulous folks I haven't interacted with in years... The cats & I are fine. Hope you & yours (& His Markness) are all doing well. - RC |
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Nelly. Spiracle. yay! (i'm drunk) but yay! RC!! |
I am VERY glad to see you posting again. And am even happier, that you are indeed the *real* folks. I apologize again for my suspiciousnes, as to your identities. And a big how-de-do to you RC! |
And how do you feel? That was a tremendously couragious thing to do. I would think it was cathartic, and somewhat exhilarating. You can be proud, my friend. |
That is to funny. It's all good girl. We need to catch up. It's been a couple of years I think. Talk to me sometime. AIM- DaniGirlFlorida1 e-mail- danigirl28@yahoo.com Jim and I have some hysterical conversations on AIM. |
I have heard back from almost everyone and everyone was very supportive. Even the right wing christian branch from southern Virginia who I thought were going to go all apeshit and flail their bibles about at me, we nothing more than supportive. One of my cousins who lives in Florida said that I was now "a more interesting person" to them. Others told me if anyone had issue with me then they were "twits," or "screwy." An uncle told me he didn't get why so many gays felt that eveyrone else were "clueless boobies" about such matters. So all in all, what I've struggled with internally for most of my life was something in the end that didn't really matter. I do think though, that much credit has to be given to increased visability towards us in the news, on TV and in music, making such coming out declarations less of an event than they might have been even 10 years ago. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure it's just as hard for younger folks today to work up the courage, but I do think things are better. Now I'm rambling on I think. LOL Oh and yes, Dani and I are in fact the REAL Jim aka Pajama and Dani. What made you think we weren't? |
That was such a heatrfelt article, and I could feel the emotions that you penned.You are an admirable gentleman. As for why I was suspicious, just too much troll activity on the boards. I suspect that many others have left here for the very same reason , that drove me away. Nobody wants to read that nonsensical drivel. I am tickled that you are back! Dani love, I'm off this week-end, and will email you so we can catch up.I better get off to bed now, as I still work nights, and have to go back in at 7pm. |
Enjoy your weekend off. |
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hey Jimbabe, did you see Jim McGreevey on the daily show last night? he was hilarious, and spot on. kinda made me think of you. he was put in the Seat of Heat. the question was, "If you had to pick one, which person do you think will be the next to 'come out'? Hillary Clinton or Condi Rice?" heh. |
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but... but... I was at the Baltimore Book Festival last Sunday, and he was scheduled to do a reading and a signing from his book. I literally ran into him in the crowd as I was backing away from a book publishing 101 tent. and he was more attractive in person than in photos. how did he respond to the Hillary/Condi question? |
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thanks. |
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jimbo, come back........ |
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*shakes fist* |
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