Heard this on the radio,and am still shaking my head: A guy gets caught crossing the Mexican/American border,because the agents noticed a bulge in his groin area,that seemed to be moving.After searching the "smuggler",it was found that he had secured 13 lizards,into tube socks,and placed them in his groin area,then attempted to bring em into the good ole USA.Only 3 were alive,they were mostly of African origin,several of the monitor species,and a couple were of the poisionous type. What a horrible death.I am sure that this is not a groin in which one would want to spend any amount of time. And let this serve as a warning to all of you: Make sure you don't attempt to cross an international border,with something squirming in your britches!

Poor Poor Lizard

if i were one of those lizards, i would have bit. especially if i were poisonous. why was he bringing them into the us, anyway?

Um, There's always something squirming in my britches. Ha! Beat you to it!

We know, Sem. and one of these days, we're going to figure out just *how* you taught the dog to deep throat, anyhow. Now THAT's a stupid pet trick worth putting on TV. too bad about the lockjaw, though. We'll figure out how to pry his mouth open, eventually. that poor chihuahua.

Goddamnit, you big sexy man, if you aren't going to take me from behind, won't you at least post under your real name? (As real as antithesis is, at any rate)

Which big sexy man? And to tell the truth, Morlock, after I taught yo' momma how to deep throat, the chihuahua was cake. Just funnin' ya.

the big sexy man who tried to pretend he was morlock when he was relaly antithesis. I mean, you're a big sexy man too, but I was referring to _that_ big sexy man.

damn isolde, that was kinda sexy you when you said "..if you ain't gonna be able to take me from behind.." I need to hear that more often. isolde are you regretting that last fuck you DIDN'T have with the boy before you left? i sense it

No, actually, I'm not. I'm applauding myself for never sleeping with him.

good girl.

I sorta thought he was Morlock.

Wasn't it obvious?

I thought it was. *ponders a combination of deep-throat conversation and taking Isolde from behind, until self-preservation instincts kick in* You think you've got it bad? I HAVE to sleep with me, like it or not. Damn. Sem: It was YOU that taught my mom that trick? Damn, boy. Our household income TRIPLED. I owe you one. Oh. And I've figgered out how to remove the chihuahua. Just hand me those wire-cutters, will ya? (PS. What's your voice like? Probably too late for a boys choir, huh?) Patrick: Your Jedi mind-tricks will not work on her! The ol' duck n' weave n' stagger n' fall down drunk. What's in a name, especially here? A rose by any other name... Antithesis was good when we were always double-posting. Thesis, Antithesis, Synthesis, jah? Morlock , the under-person, works for when I'm on the DL. Hrm. I've always thought as Morlocks as the exact opposite of Neitzsche's Overman. thoughts on this? I have a dream that someday, my little child(ren?) will be judged by not by the letters in their names, but by the content of their post! Arjuna. From the Bhagavad-Gita. He gets called on his mistakes and inferior attitudes. Changing that channel, anybody seen "Noises Off!" 's a movie. very funny. watched it last night, now I'm completely tired and wiped out and still at work.

who the fuck are you?

He's fucking antithesis, and if he doesn't want me to reach over the fucking phone line and rape him, then castrate him and leave him to the dogs, relishing the gentle falvour of his testicles for the next three months, he'll fucking post as fucking antithesis. capiche?

THIS IS ANTITHESIS/MORLOCK/GUY WHO KEEPS USING CAPS FOR NO GOOD REASON. Look here, people. My name is Tom. it's not a great name, nor my favorite. I like trying out others. I'm not hiding who I am; I'm looking for it. I don't lie about who I am, or what I do, or how old I am, or what I like; I just attach different names to my messages for Eris' sake. right. whatever. this is the part where I wander of humming "sixteen candles" to myself.

Tom's a good, honest name. I've liked all the Toms I've known. I have an uncle named Tom (really.) Keep it.

oh my god! Your name is Tom? Like my friend Tommy who I said before that you were so much like? Okay, I know I had to take it back last time, but I mean it this time: you're just creepy, mister!

tom. tomcat. tommy gun. tom short for thomas? i like thomas better.

Don't you people sleep???

Isolde wrote: He's fucking antithesis, and if he doesn't want me to reach over the fucking phone line and rape him, then castrate him and leave him to the dogs, relishing the gentle falvour of his testicles for the next three months, he'll fucking post as fucking antithesis. capiche? Are we upset, Isolde?

whoa...ridilin

I am always vigilant. And yeah.

you don't say....

Snip away, Antijutomlock, I have plenty more where that came from. And actually, your household income would have increased tenfold, except that I insisted on the standard commission. My god, they're watching Monty Python and the Holy Grail next door AGAIN

Plenty more where that came from? How so? some sorta handy-dandy go-go-gadget extensible penis? Wow. Standard commission. Fuck. that reminds me that I have to call that agent lady today. Thanks.

yes, i sleep. but i live on the west coast and i get off work at 11 pm, supposedly (usually 11:30 pm before i clock out, b/c i have to clean up the department). and sometimes i get home about midnight, around 3 am sorabji time. ya dig?

multiple penii. think pods of mutant squid eruptng from my crotch.

OH, GOD! KTHULU, NO!!!!!

YOG SHOGGOTH! IA! IA! NARNINI!!!

Shit. Mavis is gonna be pissed if she finds out that Cthulu ate her ride. Be a nice Evil, now, and give the boy his sanity back. Thanks.

You got that backwards, son.