Failed to put the toilet seat down, well I am a man, and it is expected of me isn't it?

sorabji.com: What have you failed to do?: Failed to put the toilet seat down, well I am a man, and it is expected of me isn't it?
THIS IS A READ-ONLY ARCHIVE FROM THE SORABJI.COM MESSAGE BOARDS (1995-2016).
By W I on Wednesday, April 22, 1998 - 10:12 pm:
    It is my duty to leave it up
By PetRock on Thursday, April 23, 1998 - 05:39 pm:
    W I,

    are you the Anti-Iron Woman?
By Christopher on Thursday, April 23, 1998 - 06:18 pm:
    I had a roomie (long , long ago, when I could stomach such things), and we had to share a common bathroom. On occasion, I would leave the seat up, and when she came home drunk from one of her "Womyn's" meetings, she would slam it down so hard that she actually broke the frigging porcelain.

    I never really understood this whole war about toilet seats. You would think that women would be happy that we had the sensitivity to lift the seat and not sprinkle on it. Personally, I can't imagine not inspecting the seat before I sat down on it. What if I let one of them Mormon fellas in (the ones on the bikes), and he peed on the seat? I know I wouldn't, but what if something like the aforementioned scenario occured? The lady of the house, used to having things her way, would, without glancing, sit down on room temperature pee. Not a pleasant experience I would imagine. But then, since I always inspect before I sit, I heartily doubt that it would happen to me.

    Personally, I feel that if you are married and are in a 2 income household, the best solution is to have a ladies room and a mens room. Which would raise the interesting option of having a urinal. I've never seen one in a private residence, but I KNOW that they are out there. Do they sell them at Home Depot? I've never looked.

    Moral of the story:

    Scope before you Squat.
By Christopher on Thursday, April 23, 1998 - 06:18 pm:
    I had a roomie (long , long ago, when I could stomach such things), and we had to share a common bathroom. On occasion, I would leave the seat up, and when she came home drunk from one of her "Womyn's" meetings, she would slam it down so hard that she actually broke the frigging porcelain.

    I never really understood this whole war about toilet seats. You would think that women would be happy that we had the sensitivity to lift the seat and not sprinkle on it. Personally, I can't imagine not inspecting the seat before I sat down on it. What if I let one of them Mormon fellas in (the ones on the bikes), and he peed on the seat? I know I wouldn't, but what if something like the aforementioned scenario occured? The lady of the house, used to having things her way, would, without glancing, sit down on room temperature pee. Not a pleasant experience I would imagine. But then, since I always inspect before I sit, I heartily doubt that it would happen to me.

    Personally, I feel that if you are married and are in a 2 income household, the best solution is to have a ladies room and a mens room. Which would raise the interesting option of having a urinal. I've never seen one in a private residence, but I KNOW that they are out there. Do they sell them at Home Depot? I've never looked.

    Moral of the story:

    Scope before you Squat.
By Markus on Thursday, April 23, 1998 - 08:20 pm:
    As usual, I must concur with my concise colleague. We're doing the other side a favor by lifting the seat. And for that matter, who's to say the normal position is down? Maybe men should start complaining that women keep leaving the toilet seat down.
By Pete on Saturday, April 25, 1998 - 11:31 am:
    Oooh, this reminds me....

    I used to share a house with some other people, one of whom was a woman with 2 sons who lived in the basement but used my bathroom.

    The older boy (maybe 12 or so) used to pee all over the seat and I was always forced to wipe it off....eeewwwwwwww.

    I would also find boxes of porno films hidden it the bathroom - the films belonged to either his mom or her boyfriend.....now what could he be doing in the privacy of MY bathroom with porno film boxes??? Makes me shudder just to think of it.....

    I'm all in favor of leaving the seat up....
By Nate on Saturday, April 25, 1998 - 01:37 pm:
    My mother was always strict about us putting the ring and lid down. I rip into any woman who fails to put the lid down (and many do.)

    My logic is similar to the above: The proper way to leave a toilet is everything down. If a woman complains about men not putting the seat down (and it is usually backed by some thinking such as "What if I came to tinkle in the middle of the night and fell right through?",) the question you must raise is "Why would you be sitting down to tinkle without first reaching down to lift the lid?"

    And if a woman leaves the lid up but the ring down I go into a rant about sexism and how men are the most oppressed people in the 90's.
By Pete on Sunday, April 26, 1998 - 10:16 am:
    Having grown up in a house with 3 older sisters, and being the only boy, I just got used to putting the lid down (maybe I didn't want my sisters knowing that I had just peed...). Now it is force of habit, and I leave it down. (Not to mention that if I leave the lid up, the cats will use the toliet to get to the window, and there is something unappealing about the thought of little cat paws that have just been in the litter box now being on my toliet seat)
By Christopher on Sunday, April 26, 1998 - 03:31 pm:
    My cat loves the sparkling waters. I sent PJBoy a picture of her gazing into the watery depths. The other day I came home and found a little cat sized nugget in there. I leave the lid up, because of the potential for massive savings on the kitty litter front.

    (Tasteless footnote: Its getting really warm here and my cat is shedding her insulation coat. She grooms herself about 4 hours a day. Well, the hair has got to come out some time...The other day she paid a trip to the litter box and came scampering out with a little nugget hanging out of her ass. it appeared to be hanging from a sort of cat hair macrame. She ran around the living room until it flung off onto the rug. By the time I got there with a piece of newspaper to pick it up she looked at me, sat down and scooted her little ass across my carpet. Yes (gasp), she left a little skid mark. Isn't that horrible?)
By Pete on Monday, April 27, 1998 - 01:51 pm:
    lmao@Christopher...but I've been there too...it sounds like it would be funny...seeing a cat dragging its butt across the carpet, using your rug as his own personal toliet paper, until you realize just who will have to clean up the mess.
By CarrieAnn on Monday, April 27, 1998 - 07:01 pm:
    roflmaopimp@christopher ....

    Ok, i think i have recovered from that wonderful image you gave me. Thanks for a good laugh. My cat, unfortunately is guilty of the same, so I can sympathize with you. (after i finish laughing) My friend, Jeremy made the mistake of picking our cat up a little too soon after she had used her litterbox. We see him petting her and talking to her, then he looks down and this look of terror comes over his face as he notices the brown streak on the front of his sweater. Needless to say, he doesn't pick the cat up anymore.
By R.C. on Monday, April 27, 1998 - 08:18 pm:
    Holld on/waitta minute! There is one thing both sexes do which requires that the seat be down.
    Whereas with #1/it cd go either way/ depending on who shows up in the bathroom 1st. So the FAIREST thing is for everyone to put the seat down after using the toilet/in case the person who uses it next is having a severe diarrhea attack/or something.

    But I've never understood WHY guys are taught to lift up the seat in the 1st place. The hole in the seat has gotta be at least 6 in. across. Can't most men make a clean shot without lifting the lid? I mean, really -- it's not like the equipment has to be returned to the rental shop tomorrow. You have yr whole lives to practice!
By Pete on Monday, April 27, 1998 - 09:29 pm:
    Well we haven't all mastered the art of precision urination ;-)

    Especially when it's late at night and I don't want to lower the blinds in order to turn on the bathroom light. It might take me a second to find my target so it's easier to leave the seat up.
By Dave on Monday, April 27, 1998 - 11:59 pm:
    I've never understood what the issue is here. If it's up and you want it down, put it down. If it's down and you want it up, put it up. This is one of those issues that are indicative of a much bigger problem. I think if we all learned to give each other a lot of hugs, these niggling little details would no longer develop into problems.
By Underwater on Tuesday, April 28, 1998 - 12:20 am:
    until these boards i never knew the words "precision urination." knew a guy who claimesd he could drill a hole through the toilet. but thats different.
By Dave on Tuesday, April 28, 1998 - 04:56 am:
    It's kinda like the holding a door open thing. If someone wants to hold a door open for me, that's great. If they let it close, no problem. I learned at a very early age how to operate a door and a toilet and I'm pretty good at it by now. Hell, I could probably even do tech support. If the pay was right. I might even diversify into gates or cupboards. I'm expert at anything with a hinge. There ain't a hinge I can't hack my way into or around. I'm the hinge king. So kids, don't whinge - ain't nothin' but a hinge.
By Kelsey on Tuesday, April 28, 1998 - 10:47 pm:
    nate- i am fully in agreement. everything down! absolutely. it's the fairest thing for all of us. rc- also in agreement- the chances of the toilet seat needing to be down are greater for both genders. unless you drink tons of water, but anyhow. the deeper issue dave speaks of is an everpresent conflict between the genders, i think a lot of women take the toilet seat up as a personal affront. i think that if all parties involved are able to put all the seats down, this conflict will be solved universally. i have to admit that i have sat down on the seat before only to find out that the seat is up. it annoys me. then again, i should've checked. the rim of the toilet under the seat is always nastier than the seat itself, also, so you would think that people wouldn't want others to see the sneezeguard of their toilet. i don't really have a point here. i have to go pee.

    by the way, christopher, at least you don't have a totally fucked up persian cat that needs regular haircuts because of the shit ass situation. be grateful that you just have a buttwalking kitty. that's not so bad. check out my web page for some pictures of my fucked up cat, if you wish. he brings laughter into many people's lives. his name is fluffah. i didn't name him, nor did i pick him out. he just kind of moved into my house one day.
By R.C. on Saturday, May 2, 1998 - 12:24 am:
    C'mon Kels -- Fluffah is gorgeous! And anybody who takes in a Persian knows they're high- maintenance pets (somewhat akin to dating a supermodel). But he's sooo pretty. And I hear they're very affectionate too. I'll bet yr daughter loves him to pieces.

By Christopher on Saturday, May 2, 1998 - 02:19 am:
    My cat Puma tore a hole through the bedroom window screen today and jumped 2 stories down to the street. I got home around 6:30pm and found her eating grass from a planter. My neighbor Jason told me that some asshole goths were trying to catch her, and he threatened to beat the shit out of them if they didn't leave her alone. He sat out there on the steps and watched her for over an hour until I got back (She didn't want him to pick her up). Puma was panting like a dog when I brought her in. I made dinner for Jason and drank a bottle of wine with him. He's really cute. Goddam hairball cat. I'll lose my security deposit if my loser landlord see's the hole. Now I have to take the screen uptown and get it fixed.
By Pete on Saturday, May 2, 1998 - 12:28 pm:
    You're not cruising again, are you Christopher?

    LOL....

    You should see my sofa....Sid thinks it is his own personal scratching post. So now there is a big gaping hole in the armrest, with stuffing spilling out. Max, at least, is good about where he sharpens his claws. At least I didn't have to pay for the sofa....but now I figure I may have to wait another 10-15 years to buy a new couch....or get *gasp* plastic slip covers.
By Christopher on Saturday, May 2, 1998 - 05:08 pm:
    No. I'm not cruising. I'm dating that fella Dennis, but I can't call him my boyfriend. He's a very nice guy, but I kind of think that it's not predestined to be earthshattering. Jason is a nice butch straight guy who happens to be a real sweetheart. He apparently likes cats enough to know who Puma belonged to (thank god).We're going to go down to the "Rat & Raven" and get some beers in a little bit. I wish I'd known he was this cool sooner. His girlfriend looks like a SuperModel, and could probably snap me in half. He does take off his shirt a lot though, so at least I can enjoy the view.
By No thanks on Wednesday, March 30, 2005 - 09:24 pm:

    back to the pissing on the toilet seat....I've always said that if we as guys must lift it before we piss then the women should put it down before they sit....instead of guys doin both. i think that we should go half and half with this incident

By Lapis on Thursday, March 31, 2005 - 10:57 am:

    No thanks, perhap maybe the women should lift up the seat when she's done, so that men can put it down when he's done eh?

By lapis on Thursday, March 31, 2005 - 12:37 pm:

    nice try.

By TBone on Thursday, March 31, 2005 - 01:31 pm:

    They do try so hard, too.

By Lapis on Friday, April 1, 2005 - 12:07 am:

    Perhap we should segrate the usage of toliet room for men and other toliet room for women?

By lapis on Friday, April 1, 2005 - 04:34 am:

    but what about those locales that have only one toilet room? hrm.......

By TBone on Friday, April 1, 2005 - 03:50 pm:

    Abolish toilet seats.

By semillama on Friday, April 1, 2005 - 05:53 pm:

    My brother told me that when he was in China, there weren't toilets you could sit on in some places; instead there were holes in the floor you squatted over.

    This was the set up on a train he was on.


    Let your imagination fill you in on how that works out.

By Antigone on Friday, April 1, 2005 - 07:09 pm:

    It actually works out better for your colon, in the long run...

By V on Monday, July 31, 2006 - 08:59 pm:

    Sem,you know they have the same idea in Paris,first time I saw the non-toilet,just the hole in the floor,I thought "who whould steal a toilet?"

By Dr Pepper on Tuesday, August 8, 2006 - 01:51 am:

    I remember a janitor made a sick twisted joke; Why can't a man pee like a woman, and why can't a woman pee like a man... ugghhh

By JusMiceElf on Wednesday, June 6, 2012 - 01:13 pm:

    My wife used to yell at me when I left the seat up, and often insisted
    that I come in and lower it before she would put her ass on the
    seat. As if there were some sort of cooties on the seat she was
    trying to avoid. Now that she's moved out, I'm probably better at
    leaving the seat down. Don't want my daughters to get an icy butt
    bath by surprise.

By Antigone on Thursday, June 7, 2012 - 04:03 am:

    You too, eh? The wife bugged out on me as well.

By JusMiceElf on Thursday, June 7, 2012 - 08:56 am:

    Yeah. Not the only thing, but man, the intensity of it always
    seemed a little off.

By Antigone on Thursday, June 7, 2012 - 02:47 pm:

    No, I mean my wife moved out too. She never complained about
    the toilet seat, though, as I was always adroit in the area of toilet
    etiquette.

By droopy on Friday, June 8, 2012 - 05:40 pm:

By droop on Friday, June 8, 2012 - 05:41 pm:

    it worked in the preview.

By JusMiceElf on Friday, June 8, 2012 - 08:17 pm:

    Gotcha. Misunderstood bugged out. Yeah, she's been out
    since October. Columbus Day weekend. Or, as I prefer to
    reckon it, Yom Kippur was over, and my house had no dining
    room set and no feminine hygeine products.

By Dr Pepper on Friday, June 15, 2012 - 11:16 am:

    If I were a woman and I see the toilet seat is up, I am gonna try to pee like a man....

By heather on Friday, June 15, 2012 - 07:46 pm:

    Really.

By The Watcher on Thursday, July 19, 2012 - 05:07 am:

    I'd really like to know... What is it with women and the toilet seat? Is it that hard to put it down. I mean we men have to lift it to pee standing up. Why can't they put it down? (I do put mine down as my cats can do some strange things at times.) I have a cartoon in my bathroom of a woman sitting in the toilet saying "I'm going to kill him." The thing is Look before you sit.

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