Things fall apart... & bombs do not explode


sorabji.com: What have you failed to do?: Things fall apart... & bombs do not explode
THIS IS A READ-ONLY ARCHIVE FROM THE SORABJI.COM MESSAGE BOARDS (1995-2016).

By R.C. on Saturday, February 6, 1999 - 06:28 pm:

    Okay, so anyway..... I decided last nite to do a trial run of this bomb-building thing. I was gonna do it last weekend/but that was the weekend of the Blue Moon. I read in the newspaper that altho' Blue Moons (when a 2nd full moon falls during a single calendar month) happen roughly every 2 years/2 months with Blue Moons in a single year only occurs once very 40 yrs. There was one at the end of Jan. & there will be another one in March. Altho' it was terrifically bright at nite last wknd/I figured trying to blow up a bomb when Mother Nature so obviously had her Mojo workin' overtime might lead to bad joss/or lost appendages/or worse. So I assembled the necessary ingredients last weekend/but put off the test run til last nite.

    And I simply cd NOT find Potassium Nitrate anywhere. There are no small Mom-&-Pop-type drug stores in this area -- just K-Mart & Walmart & Walgreens & Accord's. I'm sure there are feed supply stores near me (there are cow pastures everywhere in this part of FL)/but I didn't think salt peter was something one wd feed to one's livestock on a reg. basis. However/there is a fireworks store (they're legal here) on the other side of town. So I went there & bought 4 M-80's (each one is equal to 1/4 stick of dynamite/or so the salesman cautioned me).

    My ingredients list was as follows:

    - 1 large Maxwell House coffee can /opened w/one of those new-fangled can openers you see on late-nite t.v. ads (the kind that open the top by cutting under the seal just below the lid/so you get no sharp edges. My Mom gave me one when I 1st moved in here.) I dumped the coffee down the garbage disposal/which is where all Maxwell House coffee belongs.
    - the smooth-edged top to the aforementioned can
    - 1 glassed candle + one reg. taper
    - a paper plate
    - 5 lbs. of chicken innards
    - a length of hemp rope
    - my cigarette lighter
    - duct tape
    - scissors
    - a garden spade
    - a hammer
    - a large nail
    - my trusty stick-on flashlight. ( A present from a local utilities co. worker. It's flat w/a Velcro strip on back. So I pulled off the outer Velcro layer/stuck it above the bill of my baseball cap/
    & voila -- an instant headlight. (Becuz I figured I'd need both hands free)

    1st of all/Six wdn't stop trying to get into the chicken innards while they were thawing out in the sink. She kept creeping into the kitchen to get a whiff/& winding her self around my feet as I was trying to break them apart so they'd thaw out faster. She doesn't usually beg like that/but I figured she deserved a treat/so I put a piece of chicken liver in her bowl. You wd think that wd have sent her on her way w/a smile. But nooooo -- once she got a taste of the goodies/ she was underfoot the rest of the evening/ meowing at the top of her lungs (she's usually not very vocal) & begging for more. I finally had to toss her outside so I cd finish what I was doing. I got tired of waiting for the innards to thaw/so I just broke them up into chunks/stuck them in the microwave for a few seconds/ divided them into 2 zip-lock bags/double-sealed the bags/then tied them up in a plastic trash bag (so any leakage wdn't soil my duffle bag during transport).


By R.C. on Saturday, February 6, 1999 - 06:31 pm:

    [Editor's Note: For some reason/I'm having problems getting this to post. Apparently/I will have to put it up in sections.]

    Someone (who shall remain nameless) sent me some basic instructions on how to construct a small bomb. But they involved Plaster of Paris & chicken wire & a bunch of other crap I didn't feel like going out to buy. So I improvised by using what I had on hand.

    Anyway/I waited til abt 1:00 am/packed up my ingredients in a duffle bag & headed out to the spot I'd chosen previously. There are lots of woods near my home (the developers have already got those sections earmarked for construction). But they're all adjacent to the main road/which has no shoulder in most places -- therefore no safe place to park my car. Plus/ leaving a car there wd definitely draw the interest of any passing police cruiser/since the local teenage scalawags & homeless people sometimes gather in the woods. So I had to walk to my chosen spot. And fool Six decided to follow me! (She sometimes trails behind me if she's outside when I go out to get the mail. The boxes are centrally located on the other side of my condo development.) So there I am w/a bag reeking of chicken guts/trying to walk & shoo away the damn cat. Who of course/thought I wanted to 'play' & proceeded to dash up to me & nip at me feet every chance she got. Fortunately/she only followed me as far as the mailboxes/then she got distracted by a toad on the sidewalk & chasing went after him.

    The walk took me nearly 45 mim. And the load I was carrying seemed to get heavier w/every step. I wished I'd thought to wear my Walkman -- at least I wd've had some music to make the walk pass more quickly. And I sure as hell wished I'd taken my regular rucksack/rather than a duffle bag. But my rucksack is leather & I didn't wanna risk ruining it. But my arms & shoulders were already sore by the time I got there. (I hoped I still have some Tiger Balm somewhere when I get home...). Still, it was definitely a good workout.

    Upon arriving at my designated spot/a few hundred feet into the woods off the main road/I lit the glassed candle (which happened to bear the image of St. Barbara w/a prayer inscribed on the glass. But it was the only large glassed candle at supermarket had/so...)/tunred on my headlight & proceeded to construct my little bomb.

    I had learned from by brief reading on the subject that the construction of a successful explosive device happens from the inside out. Meaning if you assemble the inner components correctly/yr bomb shd go off properly. So 1st I taped together the 4 M-80's w/duct tape. Then I twisted the 4 fuses together & tied them w/a long thread of hemp -- to insure that when the fuses burned down/they wd all go off at once. I placed the 2 bags of chicken innards (now completely thawed & starting to smell a LOT!) into the coffee can/leaving space in the center for the M-80's. I added sand & dirt to cover the bottom & fill the can abt 3/4 full/then placed the M-80's on top of the sand. I then packed some additional sane in btwn the M-80's & the chicken innards/to stabilize everything/taking care to make sure that no sand covered the top of the explosives/so the flame of the fuses wd burn down completely. Then I punched a hole in the top of the coffee can w/the nail/tried to pull the fuses thru the hole/& realized the hole was too small & wd probably choke out the flame. So I used the nail to punch more holes around the 1st hole. Now I was able to pull the fuses thru w/out a problem.


By R.C. on Saturday, February 6, 1999 - 06:33 pm:

    Then I grabbed the coffee can lid/poured some of the melted wax from the St. Barbara candle onto the plate/rolled the edge of the lid thru the wax & the stuck it onto the top of the can. A minute or so later/I had a nice tight seal w/the fuses coming out of the hole in the top of the lid. So I sat down to smoke a cigarette & figure out how to extend the fuse so I wd be far enuf away from the explosion not to get my damnself blown to bits.

    I then proceeded to dig a hole abt a foot deep to place the bomb into. (I wanted the bomb to explode upward/& spray chicken guts all over the place/vs. exploding sideways -- hence the need to bury the bomb). Having done so/I put the bomb into the hole/covered it over loosely w/sand (the soil here is very sandy once you dig before the surface)/brushed the sand away from the center of the lid where the fuses were protruding/& sat back to admire my handiwork. So far/so good.

    I tied a rock to the end of my hemp & proceeded to walk 150 paces away from the bomb. (Maybe this was too far/but better too far than not far enuf.) I found a spot behind a tree/tied the other end of the hemp to a stick/then went back to my awaiting bomb.

    Now I had to secure the other end of the hemp to the fuses. I tied the end of the hemp to the end of fuse coming out of the bomb & secured it w/ a little candle wax/to make sure the connection wasn't broken as it burned down. I figured I was all set to detonate.

    I checked to watch -- it was nearly 3:00 am. I packed all my tools & evidence into my duffle bag/carried it to the spot behind the tree/lit myself another smoke & said "Okay, this is it." I was surprisingly nervous abt the whole thing. How loud wd the explosion be? Wd the cops come when they heard it? Wd I have time to get away before they got there? (Suppose they were driving by just as the thing went off!) But I excited abt pulling this whole thing off/even if it was just a test run. And I didn't think I was close enuf to end up getting hurt. So I lit the hemp & set it down on the ground.

    It burned for abt a foot then went out! I hadn't thought to clear a path for the fuse/so the flame wdn't be obstructed by any debris/etc. So I followed the length of hemp backwards towards where the bomb was & cleared a path by dragging my foot back & forth. I had to stop & pull up a few small weeds & plants that were in the way. Fifteen minutes or so later/I was back at the bomb. I cd see a clear path most of the way btwn where I was I where I wd be when I lit the fuse. There were a few small shrubs along the way/but I'd routed the hemp around them/so the fuse shd burn w/no problem.

    So I went back to my post/litthe fuse again & watched it burn. I appeared to keep burning for several feet this time -- then the damn thing went out AGAIN! Now I had to undo the fuse from the bomb & run out another length of hemp/so I wd be far enuf away not to get hurt when the explosion went off. This whole thing was becoming more trouble than it was worth.

    This time/I decided to coat the entire length of fuse w/wax from the cnadle/figuring that wd ensure that my fuse wd burn all the way back to the bomb. It took a few minutes to reassemble everything/& I ended up getting wax all over myself/but I got it done. So here goes attempt #3...

    The fuse kept burning... kept burning... as far as I could see (my view was partially obstructed by flora) the fuse was burning fine. So I waited.... And waited.... No Ka-boom! I waited some more. Just as I got up to walk over to the bomb & check on it/I heard something moving up ahead to my right. I looked over & my headlight beam landed on a big rat raccoon/it's eyes glittering back at me in the darkness. It was abt 10 ft. from my little bomb/abt 20 ft. from where I was. Apparently/the smell of the chicken had been too much too resist. I didn't see the fuse flame anywhere/so I assumed it had gone out again. I ran towards the bomb/shooed the raccoon away/& finally said fuck it/I'm going home.

    Hopefully/my lettle bomb will still be waiting there when I get back. Obviously/I'm having problems getting the fuse to stay lit & burn all the way back to the bomb. But I know hemp burns very quickly (esp. wax-coated hemp) & I cdn't think of any other material to use for the fuse. I plan to go back tonite & try to set the damn thing off again. But I think I need to rig up a different kind of fuse.

    Any suggestions?


By Pink Eye on Sunday, February 7, 1999 - 05:57 am:

    You could still use the hemp. Set the candle a foot in front of your bomb. Use enough hemp to make the distance to your place of cover. When you're ready, guide the hemp over the flame. This might work providing the burning efficiency of the rope with added wax. Keep us posted:)


By Cyst on Sunday, February 7, 1999 - 09:50 am:

    r.c., that is a really good story. I can't wait to hear about next time (I hope it explodes -- be careful!).

    if you make this into a hobby, you should think of good holidays on which to set off bombs. I think there's a british holiday in the fall (nov. 5, bonfire night, guy falkes day) commemorating this guy who, in the 17th century or something, got pissed off at parliament and tried to blow up the building.

    I would think a blue moon -- or any full moon night -- would be a great time to light a bomb. I don't think mother nature really cares about the moon being classified as blue, as that's just a function of pope gregory's calendar.


By R.C. on Sunday, February 7, 1999 - 11:44 pm:

    But guys -- if I light the fuse a mere foot away from my little bomb/how the hell will I keep from getting blown to bits?

    I've seen demolition footage of people taking down office towers on t.v./so I know what a really big explosion looks like. But I've never seen a single stick of dynamite go off. I figure I've gotta be at least 100 ft. away to be safe. And behind a tree or some bushes/to keep from getting splattered w/chicken parts.

    I checked on my bomb a little while ago. It's still there/but there were crazy paw prints & track marks all around it. It stinks to high heaven & every critter within a 5 mi. radius must be trying to get into that can. I think I'll have to abandon that one & start fresh next time around.

    But what I reall need is a better fuse. A real one -- like they use for explosions in the movies. Got any ideas where I can get my hands on some of that stuff? (What is that stuff anyway?)

    And Cyst -- I have a lot of respect for Mother Nature. I've seen women go into labor 4 wks. early during a Blue Moon/or an excessively high tide. I don't think one can harness those types of invisible powers/but I do believe they have an effect on humans. I sure as hell wdn't do anything overtly risky during a Blue Moon. Or an eclipse. Or the day a comet was passing by. Becuz Mojo can be a muthafucker!


By Pink Eye on Monday, February 8, 1999 - 11:18 am:

    R.C., look at my previous posting again. Use a hundred feet of the rope, or enough to reach your place of cover. Have that candle burning near the bomb--are you with me?:) Go take cover NOW! When you're ready for detonation simply pull the rope taught and guide it over the flame. May require some steady hands and patience, not that you don't have those qualities pre-explosion.


By Nate on Monday, February 8, 1999 - 12:44 pm:

    "cannon fuse" can be bought gun supply type stores.

    If you could find the salt peter, you could make a respectable fuse by soaking your hemp rope in a saturated solution of salt peter and water, and letting it dry. ammoniumn nitrate should work too.


By Bagpuss on Monday, February 8, 1999 - 03:38 pm:

    Guy Fawkes night in Britain is when the whole country light bonfires and set off fireworks to commemorate the death of the bloke who tried to blow up parliament.

    The last man to enter the building with honest intentions.

    Nov 5th it is. And it's cool.

    I don't see why Arsey couldn't blow some stuff up in solidarity with her British Cousins. And she'd have to get some practice in between now and November ;)


By Spengler on Monday, February 8, 1999 - 06:03 pm:

    penny for the old guy, huh?

    we've probably blown up enough stuff overseas as it is.


By R.C. on Monday, February 8, 1999 - 06:59 pm:

    Ohhhh -- the Brits have a holiday on my very own birthday?! Honoring an anarchist, no less!
    (But this Guy Fawkes was apparently not a very accomplished bomber.)

    Guess I'll be ringing in my next b.d. w/a BANG!

    But I'd really prefer fireworks to a plain old ka-boom. They're so much more enjoyable.

    Thanks for the cannon fuse tip, Nate. There are certainly plenty of gun shops in these parts.

    (Wonder if they also sell cannons...?)


By Whet on Wednesday, February 10, 1999 - 08:46 pm:

    You go R.C.!
    :)
    High school janitor showed us how to make reliable fuses using the school room blind cords (same thing wid the salt peter) but a fuse is still a fuse.

    The really elegant method is with rocket ignitors, and are about the only thing reliable to use for underwater bombs (an excellent method of testing your wares, may stun/kill a few fish but if you like fish tis a bonus!) pick rocket ignitors up at the hobby shop, n a roll of cheap speaker wire, and a lantern battery. When it goes, pull the wire back and its ready for use again - with no burned out fuse remains. plus YOU control exactly when it goes off, not one of those light it and 2-3 minutes into the burn the cops pull up to shoot the breeze, and its too close to run put out and if you run you might get caught etc.

    remote electrical. thats the way to go - tis in one of the other posts someone already talked about them I think. work great, cheap too.

    rockets are fun to build. takes a lot of technique to get fuel packed in for even burning (home made black powder - relatively slow burning), a nozzel size large enough to not develop excessive internal pressure and small enough to create the required gas velocity for lift. best ones ever are those where power and weight are almost balanced, you get a minature saturn rocket, that shakes and roars and slowly rises to a height of 20-30 feet then peters out. that is *really* hard to achieve without a lot of experimentation and very consistant results with fuel production.

    oh and btw, if your nozzel collapses or gets clogged and your fuel tube is too thick, you have a small bomb too ;)

    start out recycling used hobby rocket motors - estes or something like that. can usually get one good repacking before they are toast.

    Plus I miss the good ole simple bonfire days. Burn a bunch of pallets or trees or whatever on a cold night, roast marshmellows, drink beer, whatever.





By R.C. on Wednesday, February 10, 1999 - 10:51 pm:

    Whet -- what on earth is a lantern battery? The lanterns I have run off oil.

    And re: "a nozzel size large enough to not develop excessive internal pressure and small enough to create the required gas velocity for lift." Are you telling my my hole was too big?

    (Stop that sniggering in the back row!)

    Am I off track here? I thought 'excessive internal pressure' is what bombs are all abt. If my reading serves me correctly/an explosion is just a great outward rush of oxygen molecules from a concentrated central location. The only reason that the federal bldg. in OK.City was so deadly was becuz the velocity was so great from the initial point of the explosion/but mainly becuz concrete & people were around. That very same bomb/set off in an empty cornfield in Iowa/wdn't have done anything but create a lot of noise & smoke & a big whole in the ground.

    Or is my physics all damed-to-hell here?

    As far as the fuse thing goes/next time I'd just as soon run a line of lighter fluid or gasoline from my safe spot to the end of the fuse. The only part abt the whole adventure that made me hincty was not knowing if I was far enuf away to be safe.


By Nate on Thursday, February 11, 1999 - 10:56 am:

    you could soak your hemp in gasoline.

    I think whet was talking about rockets, as opposed to bombs. rockets focus the gas out one end to provide acceleration.




By Whet on Friday, February 12, 1999 - 09:36 pm:

    Ya remember those big ole flashlights (lanterns in some tongue, probably british but not sure...) that had humongous batteries, with either 2 little cone springs on top, or a couple of plastic threaded studs? Those kind of batteries. Course I have used fresh 9v ones - just takes a bit o current to get the little wire in the middle of the dab of ignitor paste to fire off.
    Ya Nate, was talking about rockets - and referring to how your 'harmless' rocket *could* turn into a bomb ;-)
    Or you could smoke the hemp and huff the gasoline and the bomb would go off? Just jokin there, though I did used to work with some nuts that did things like that for fun. (umm the hemp n gas - not the bombs, not wanting to include myself in the nut category - more, more... more? i'll think of a word one of these days.

    careful with gasoline. it has a nasty habit of collecting vapors in low lying areas, and when you strike the match, the humongous *VOOP* will give you a new doo whether you want one or not!

    give the electrical method a try. you'll like it.




By Cyst on Friday, April 2, 1999 - 01:13 pm:

    I was wrong about what a full moon is.

    04-01 12:07p


    Ooops! 53 years later, magazine corrects definition of `blue moon'

    AP Photos PAL101, NYR139
    AP Graphic BLUE MOON

    By TOM KIRCHOFER
    Associated Press Writer

    BOSTON (AP) - A 53-year-old error over the term "blue moon" has journalists red in the face.

    Sky and Telescope magazine has admitted it made an error in an article which said "blue moon" referred to the second full moon within the same month.

    "I hate to admit it," said Roger Sinnott, associate editor of Sky and Telescope, who blamed the goof on an amateur astronomer, James Hugh Pruett.

    Pruett wrote a 1946 piece for the magazine after apparently misinterpreting a complex 1937 article in the Maine Farmer's Almanac which said that when a season contains four full moons, the
    third is called a blue moon.

    Pruett, according to the magazine, mistakenly thought that the almanac meant that a blue moon was the second full moon within the same month.

    The mistake went unnoticed for decades. A 1980 National Public Radio story about blue moons used the wrong definition and the board game Trivial Pursuit repeated the error in 1986.

    Sky and Telescope, based in Cambridge, Massachusetts, discovered the error when it was working on an article about how January and March of this year featured what would have been two blue moons.

    But by the revised definition, Wednesday's much-discussed moon was blue-less. For the record, the next by-the-book blue moon will be on Feb. 19, 2000.

    Although Sky and Telescope's editors think the mistake by Pruett, of Eugene, Ore., led to the modern mis-definition of "blue moon," it's unclear where the Maine Farmer's Almanac came up with the rule.

    The almanac, put out by Augusta, Maine-based printer Charles E. Nash and Son, continued publication at least through the mid-1950s
    but is now defunct, said Peter Geiger, editor of the unrelated Farmers' Almanac in Lewiston, Maine.

    Though Pruett, who died in 1955, never lived to see his mistake corrected, the amateur astronomer's definition may endure nevertheless.

    "This meaning is so entrenched now. Nothing we can do is going to put the genie back in the bottle," Sinnott said. "Our big mistake in 1946 has really caught on and there's no turning back."


By Cyst on Friday, April 2, 1999 - 01:13 pm:

    I was wrong about what a full moon is.

    04-01 12:07p


    Ooops! 53 years later, magazine corrects definition of `blue moon'

    AP Photos PAL101, NYR139
    AP Graphic BLUE MOON

    By TOM KIRCHOFER
    Associated Press Writer

    BOSTON (AP) - A 53-year-old error over the term "blue moon" has journalists red in the face.

    Sky and Telescope magazine has admitted it made an error in an article which said "blue moon" referred to the second full moon within the same month.

    "I hate to admit it," said Roger Sinnott, associate editor of Sky and Telescope, who blamed the goof on an amateur astronomer, James Hugh Pruett.

    Pruett wrote a 1946 piece for the magazine after apparently misinterpreting a complex 1937 article in the Maine Farmer's Almanac which said that when a season contains four full moons, the
    third is called a blue moon.

    Pruett, according to the magazine, mistakenly thought that the almanac meant that a blue moon was the second full moon within the same month.

    The mistake went unnoticed for decades. A 1980 National Public Radio story about blue moons used the wrong definition and the board game Trivial Pursuit repeated the error in 1986.

    Sky and Telescope, based in Cambridge, Massachusetts, discovered the error when it was working on an article about how January and March of this year featured what would have been two blue moons.

    But by the revised definition, Wednesday's much-discussed moon was blue-less. For the record, the next by-the-book blue moon will be on Feb. 19, 2000.

    Although Sky and Telescope's editors think the mistake by Pruett, of Eugene, Ore., led to the modern mis-definition of "blue moon," it's unclear where the Maine Farmer's Almanac came up with the rule.

    The almanac, put out by Augusta, Maine-based printer Charles E. Nash and Son, continued publication at least through the mid-1950s but is now defunct, said Peter Geiger, editor of the unrelated Farmers' Almanac in Lewiston, Maine.

    Though Pruett, who died in 1955, never lived to see his mistake corrected, the amateur astronomer's definition may endure nevertheless.

    "This meaning is so entrenched now. Nothing we can do is going to put the genie back in the bottle," Sinnott said. "Our big mistake in 1946 has really caught on and there's no turning back."


By Cyst on Friday, April 2, 1999 - 01:17 pm:

    sorry about posting twice.

    and what's the current bomb situation, rc?


By R.C. on Saturday, April 3, 1999 - 04:41 am:

    I saw that piece in the paper too. But I still prefer the other explaination.

    As for my apprentice bomber efforts/I've had to abandon them becuz my nites are no longer my own. I have a for-real day job now/plus I'm working p/t at nite during the week & on Sunday's to pick up some extra cash. I'm going back to NY for a week (my homegirl's getting married Memorial Day wknd & I'm her maid-of- honor. Who the hell invented that term anyway?) & I need to be flush. And buy a killer wedding present for my girl & her new groom. (I'm considering booking them a weekend at The Carlyle for their 6-mo. anniversary/which wd be in Oct. Or maybe at The Copley in Boston -- if it's still there -- so they can drive up & do the fall foliage/lobster-&-chamgpane dinner thing. But I dunno -- maybe they'd just want cash. Any suggestions? Tis a 2nd marriage for both/so mundane stuff like housewares is out of the question.) So my nocturnal explosives practice is on hold for now.

    Plus/I found out after that 1st failed attempt that setting off bombs is a lot like tipping over cows. S'just no fun w/out a partner.


By Dave on Sunday, May 9, 2004 - 04:00 pm:

    u full of it u cant buy realy m-80's leagally anywere in the us sweetie


By Anthony on Friday, June 25, 2004 - 11:13 pm:

    if u were caught with a real m-80 u would be in deep **** i just read on another site that if u were caught with one u could go to jail for up to 7 year that is what the military uses as fake gun shots so that is bacicly goverments property it is kind of like u haveing a tank in ur back yard!!!!!!!


By Dave on Friday, June 25, 2004 - 11:15 pm:

    it would actually be funny to c som 1 get arrested for a bomb type fire work i would laugh my ass off if it happened


By Www.galaxyfireworks.com on Friday, June 25, 2004 - 11:17 pm:

    thats so ****ing retarded


By Andy on Sunday, June 27, 2004 - 06:53 pm:

    Know what I find funny?

    Someone tried to blow up a coffee can full of chicken parts in the middle of the woods and people are still reading about it...

    ...FIVE YEARS LATER


By Gay on Wednesday, April 13, 2005 - 11:02 pm:

    lol this is gay


By Benoit on Thursday, April 14, 2005 - 11:13 am:

    Would you like to know what is really gay?


By beta on Friday, December 2, 2011 - 08:28 pm:

    I've seen a "meat bomb" referenced in Always Sunny in Philadelphia a couple of times now; which makes me think about this post, and then wonder if Danny Devito is a secret sorabjiite...

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7KW635JjjlY


By Beta on Friday, December 2, 2011 - 08:29 pm:

    Also, way the fuck to go on finally making links automatic, mt.


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