| THIS IS A READ-ONLY ARCHIVE FROM THE SORABJI.COM MESSAGE BOARDS (1995-2016). |
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I keep trying to remember. It wasn't Stuart. Or Jim. I think it was John... but, there are a lot of Johns... So we just bundled it through the night, it was very sweet, not much sleeping happened. We never "saw" each other again (although we saw each other lots of times in the department). I never thanked him properly, he did right, deflowering me turned out to be a lot of trouble... Armstrong. John Armstrong. Memory is amazing. |
but maybe i've become a total p.c. wimp. case in point: i went to an indian (dot) restaurant last night and there was belly-dancing. now, i'm not a prude. i swear, i'm not. but i just felt silly watching these women undulate in front of us, encouraging everyone to ogle them. it doesn't have anything to do with being attracted to them. these women were not attractive in the popular sense, but even if they were, even if they were painfully attractive, it's like i've been conditioned to not stare at women -- especially their seductive bits. then again, maybe it's a personal thing with me. when i see a pretty woman, and i can certainly recognize beauty, my default mode is to treat them as if they were an ugly man. no flirting, no staring. just business. venti iced americano, extra ice. thanks. i'm always nice, polite. i don't gush and i don't throw fits and i don't expect anything else from anyone else. just business. but i became the focus of a few in the dinner party. it became an issue of whether i was watching, would i slip a dollar bill in the dancer's costume, etc. i just wanted to have some food and hang out with my friends and family. i never suspected that i was obligated to participate in the entertainment. and it's not a matter of prudishness. i'm not offended by bellydancers. nor would i be offended if this were a strip club and the dancers were wagging their clits in the patron's faces. what bugged me is that my response (or lack thereof) to the performance seemed to bother other people. i didn't care if they were into it. why was it an issue that i wasn't? sheesh. sorry, nelly. you can have your thread back. i just felt compelled to bare my neurosis to the world. |
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i've had a good experience with belly dancers. it was my grandfather's birthday (83rd) and we decided to to take him to a lebanese restaurant called byblos. it's up in the old north side and has been around for 30 years. they've even have a hookah lounge. but we decided to treat my grandfather to some belly dancers. byblos has regular performances by a belly dancing instructor named sa'diyya or her students. the night we went, two of her students performed - pale, caucasian women one of whom lived up to the "belly" part of the performance. they did their routine and you were encouraged to put dollar bills into their belt (or whatever). i've never seen my grandfather have such a good time. this was especially touching since he had cancer and this would be the last birthday he'd ever see. |
you, on the other hand, are this site's equivalent of a bad case of acne. |
but i'm not anti-fun, either. seriously, i'm neutral. have a blast or go home or just hang out. again, you're right. if you're counting on my enthusiasm to insure a fun night for everyone, don't invite me. better for all. i truly want everyone to have a good time. i'm not out there griping about anything. but sometimes, i just want to disappear and let the rest of you party. sadly, it's hard for a 300 lb man to disappear in a small restaurant. hey, whatever. next time, i'll decline the invitation if they're gracious enough to extend it. |
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that wasn't actually supposed to be an insight into how fun you are or aren't, dave. just a snappy opening sentence. you and i sound a lot alike. and it's hard for a guy in a wheelchair to disappear. it's just that i don't care anymore. |
maybe that's why i was invited. maybe they assumed i'm always on. i dunno. probably not. maybe they just like me. maybe i'm waaaaay oversensitive. i know i do have a problem with groups of more than a few people unless i have some specific task to perform. group events, i linger at the edges. even when it's all friendly. even at family events. sorry if that makes some folks uncomfortable but consider how uncomfortable i am with being drawn out. |
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2. dave is correct, v: nelly is in the pantheon, the pallas athena of sorabji. a part of a long gone golden age. 3. what the hell kind of bbs gets sidetracked from a discussion about deflowering sexy librarians? it is madness. |
getting distracted from deflowering sexy librarians is not cool. damn. |
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I'd kill for a lebanese restaurant right now. or any type of decent restaurant. I'm in Hagerstown, MD, on a project and the town is strangely devoid of places to eat that aren't TGI Friday's or their ilk. |
Anyhow, yeah, Dave's pretty paranoid with social situations. He's exaggerating the issue just slightly. Cleo must have put about ten dollars in those bellydancers' belts. She was totally into it. |
v assumed that the link was nelly's personal site. (duh, iteration #5003) hence, goatee. he seems to understand his mistake now but he enjoys the occasional attention the likely faked misunderstanding sometimes draws. any attention is good to a trollbot. |
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so, if you are ever in Hagerstown, that's where to go. i'm so damn full. |
Luckily, I'm filled with the urge to defecate. |
i've driven through there and i figured you were destined for subway or olive garden or such. |
i took belly dancing classes once, but all i got out of it was muscle aches in places i didn't know i had. the instructor was a middle aged blonde woman. |
i'm ok with belly-dancing. in this particular situation, the setting was intimate enough that merely watching the dancers meant being drawn into the performance. that was what i was trying to avoid but some folks (agatha) seem to enjoy tormenting me. i liken it to pulling several legs off a daddy longlegs and then trying to scare it into pathetically hobbling away to safety. haha, mr. longlegs. you run funny! let's see how funny you run with only one foreleg. hahahahaha! funny! if the situation were reversed, i'd step in to defend her. or any of those 3 or 4 that thought it was funny to make it an issue and then watch me squirm. it wasn't just agatha. whatever, i can take a little shit and not blow it up into a major event. i mean, i could have made a big scene and stormed out. i didn't, but that doesn't mean i wasn't very put out by the whole thing. shit, i did it again. sorry, nelly. i'm done. |
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PS- Dave is an exaggerater |
SEE I TOLD YOU I WASN'T THE ONLY ONE WHO ENJOYED TORMENTING HER SIGNIFICANT OTHER I TOLD YOU I TOLD YOU I TOLD YOU NYANYANYANYAAAAAA |
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especially when they're ticklish. as long as tormenting is balanced with back rubs, i believe it's justified. whenever i attempt to imitate* bellydance, my sides ache for days. * please do not confuse this with actual bellydance, i'm only recently beginning to learn the actual mechanics of it all. |
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speaking of a long gone golden age, does anyone scrabble any more? |
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pretty AT sorabji.com |
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bundling is a colonial term, referring to a courting man and woman being allowed to sleep in the same bed but with their clothes on. what made you remember that incident nelly? |
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before i launch into an epic soliloquy, quick question -- is there belly dancing in india? thought that was mostly middle eastern. anyway. dave, you are not alone. i'm not down with belly dancing at my table while i'm eating. dinner theater, i'm okay with that. there's a stage and the performers are a good distance from me. but when i dine out, i like to focus on my company and my food. having wiggly jiggly parts in my face, having to stop conversation, smile, pretend enjoyment, while silently willing the girl to put her clothes back on and fetch me another glass of wine - it's just annoying. and trust me. i appreciate the art of belly dancing, and wiggly women's hips. but if i wanted to see that while i'm eating, i'd go to a strip club or tittie bar or whatever. a friend of mine once held her birthday party at a middle eastern restaurant. she reserved the whole back patio and there were about 20 people. the food was great and there was belly dancing - but it was AFTER we were done eating and everyone was just sitting around sipping on cocktails and hanging out. then it was cool. she even got a few women (including yours truly) to get up and try belly dancing. it was embarrassing, and i too over the years have grown disdainful of being the center of attention. but it was my friend's party and i didn't want to be a party pooper. having a glass of wine or two in me helped a lot. but i feel your pain. i do. in the last couple years i've become quite fond of the idea of being mostly invisible. which, well... let's face it. i used to be starved for attention. i used to love parties and holding court. this was all during the post-weightloss era of discovering the great power of beauty. spent so many years trying so hard to not be invisible, then finally not being invisible at all, but rather very very uh... yeah. flirtatious, gregarious... maybe some other less flattering adjectives. i went to a wedding reception last saturday with about 150 people, and i just wanted to crawl into a hole and dig myself a tunnel back to my house. the music was too loud, people were too drunk, all of them yelling and laughing and standing WAY too close to me. i had nothing to talk about. how are you? great, how have you been? great! what's new? oh, nothing much. how's the house? it's fine, maybe we'll have that house warming party one of these days... (silence) isn't this a great view...? very quickly the discussion turns to weather, and i know i'm safely only moments away from being ditched in search of more interesting, less awkward conversationalists. you wanna talk politics? exercise? books? music? travel? great, i'm your woman. but face it, how often are you in a group social situation where people are sober enough or composed enough to be really interested in anything you have to say? mostly it's speculation about angelie jolie's relationship with Handsome Actor #23. someone's ecstacy trip at burning man. professional sports. whatever. please please please just leave me alone. i don't care if you think i'm boring. not that i couldn't tap into a well of charming and witty repoire. i just don't want to anymore. it's too much work for too little reward. it's the other things too... can't wait to get rid of the bitch basket - driving a convertible draws too much attention. wearing looser, plainer clothes. it's not like i'm anthropophobic. i'm fine with my close friends, in small numbers. yet only infrequently. i had to turn off my cell phone because i would have mild panic attacks every time it would ring. it's not natural for everyone to be able to talk to you at any given moment throughout the day and then get peeved or take it personally if you don't answer. i'm driving, i'm grocery shopping, i'm walking my dogs. IS IT THAT FUCKING URGENT? so now the message on my cell informs callers it's used only for emergencies and to leave a message on my home phone. (btw people don't get peeved or take it personally when they know they're calling your house and get the answering machine.) i don't like people calling me in general anymore. don't call me i'll call you. i've even come to hate making plans with anyone in advance. what if i make plans to go out with someone friday night, and then friday night comes and i just simply don't feel like it anymore? now i tell people "it sounds really fun, but i don't like to plan things that far in advance. can you call me that day and remind me?" because unless i'm in the mood to be social, i pretty much just want to be left alone. it seems to be working. the fewer friends i have the better. just a handful of close, real, fun friends who don't need to do something together every single weekend or else they feel neglected and give me a guilt trip. if you told me 5 years ago that someday i'd become a loner, it would have seem preposterous. |
maybe it should be disband. i'll have to think about this by myself. hell yes they belly dance in india. especially in the hindu regions - dig shiva's boogie. it's sort of like bharati hula. |
I got rid of my cell phone again, and I don't miss it. I almost never answered it except when I was home or at work. Now I have a VOIP phone line which is like a cell phone with unlimited minutes that I leave at home all the time. |
then wanting to or actually cancelling them. The nice thing about graduate school is that everyone has so much to do all the time and no one can ever know how busy (or not) anyone else's schedule is that it's easy to avoid socializing. |
The hot air continues to blow. It's been like this all week. Why are they trying to kill us? |
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Personally, I am terrible with the socializing. I have a cell phone, which is my only phone, but it usually is sitting at home or wedged into the couch. Not that anyone calls me anyway. I hate making plans, because then I actually have to follow through with them, go out into the world, and deal with groups larger than three. I loathe parties. Yes, indeed, loners unite. |
HOLY FUCK bitch, if i wanted to see you the friday after next i would goddamn call you THEN, not NOW. How will i know what i feel like doing in 2 weeks? What if I feel like shit that day? What if i just don't want to go out? What if i just don't friggen feel like seeing you? I realize with horror that apparently everyone else IS in fact making such plans in advance, and that's why they sound so confused and put upon when i call them at 10:30pm on a Thursday night "Hey whatcha doin'? Wanna go for coffee? Wanna go for coffee now??" I just never know. How does it all work? Why did i never learn it? When is the proper time for scheduling weekend activities? Give me the damn appointment times. I absolutely refuse to plan or confirm things for New Year's Eve. This is the one day you could lose friends over this shit, so no one gets a "yes" from me. New Year's is the worst for this. Tell me when your party starts and good luck to all contestants.....cause I'm staying at home like every year and you can eat my dick. I never know what i want to do until 10 that night anyway. Gawd. I have to plan my birthday party soon. I should have weeks ago. Can't they all just come to me? Just show up for god sakes without planning? Creepier than this is people who plan meals in advance. I can't eat pasta when I'm hungry for an omlette, you can't even make me. I shop 3 days in advance, max, and that usually doesn't even work out. How does that work. Do people not have whims? |
Whatever happened to the plane that supposedly hit the pentagon? Why did we find not a single piece of wing, fuselage or wreckage or body? Why is there but a ten foot diameter hole in the innermost wing wall of the buidling. Why did the Feds confiscate all local surveillence cameras which took footage of the incoming plane which no one saw? Whatever happened to us? According to Goggle and the official record, I died at the WTC. My high school chums think it, and still try to email me. And people STILL want to come to visit me. And the ones I want to visit me never come. |
I'm a pantheist if not an animist, so yea sorabjipantheists. Do we have a t-shirt logo yet? and or but at least the gorrilla in me gets out once in a awhile to belly dance. where've you been hiding, ms. anita? |
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apparently she's been busy drinking from "the untreated well of happiness". yes whims i am one giant whim i was trying to explain to someone about how socializing is so different here than in hawaii. in hawaii you call anyone up pretty much any time of day and say, "hey wanna go surfing (or hiking, or to lunch, or kayaking or to the beach or whatever)", and they say, "sure, i'll meet you at your house in 20 minutes." and that's that. here if you want to do anything with anyone, if you ask the hour before or even a day or two before, they've already made plans but will pencil you in for next week. it's so retarted. people are so busy all the time doing this or that, scheduling every minute of every day. you know what can handle? when people just stop by unannounced to visit. happens so rarely but almost always turns out to be a good interruption. then again, we don't have any family nearby. on another note - speaking of pantheon - has anyone here read Middlesex? |
Dates further off than 3 days or so leave no imprint on my mind. As far as I'm concerned, there's Tomorrow, The Day After Tomorrow, Three Days Hence, and The Mysterious Future. The last three are a bit hazy. Has anyone seen the movie for "Everything Is Illuminated"? Is it any good? The local store will sell it to me, but not rent it. I have a friend who is worse than I am when it comes to planning. He makes plans like a crazy person, but forgets about them immediately. I'll call him up and ask if he wants to go get some coffee, to which he'll reply, "Sure. I just need to finish something up. I'll call you back in an hour." If he does indeed call, it will be 3 hours later, after the coffee shop has closed. |
well, maybe i am all of that. but i'm in good company. thanks, sarah. and thanks all of the rest for the affirmation. i know i come off as a major prick, but i'm not just a hater. i cried for the autistic dude who scored all those points at the end of his team's last game. i even cried when our dumbass posterboy president bush met with him and acknowledged his performance. politics aside, the guy got the attention of a sitting president, even one as aloof as this cocksucker. you go, special ed hoopster!! i teared up countless times watching the olympics. i really get into the drama of folks who put it all on the line, win or lose. (except for those cases like the speed skater guys. hey guys, fuck you. go away.) i'm just very glad to read that i'm not such a freak. and, yeah, unless i'm expecting a call, i hate it when my cell phone rings. cell phones suck. my grandma died today. long overdue. she's been battling alzheimer's, diabetes and general oldness. she went peacefully, stopped breathing after a week or so of renal failure and morphine treatments. peace, grandma. and happy b-day to me. and nate. |
happy birthday. peace to your grandma. paz a su abuela. where the hell IS nate? |
And may your grandmother get her celestial freak on, and I'm sorry for your loss, and happy birthday you bitch. |
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happy birthday dave, and nate. i found out yesterday a friend of mine in maui died. as soon as i heard the news, my first thought was "drunk accident" or "drug overdose". found out later that he fell off a ladder and broke his back. after some time in the hospital was sent home for 6 weeks bed rest, with a prescription of morphine... it only took him 24 hours to overdose and die. for Scot and dave's grandma: "At last you have departed and gone to the Unseen. What marvelous route did you take from this world? Beating your wings and feathers, you broke free from this cage. Rising up to the sky you attained the world of the soul. You were a prized falcon trapped by an Old Woman. Then you heard the drummer's call and flew beyond space and time. The wine of this fleeting world caused your head to ache. Finally you joined the tavern of Eternity. Like an arrow, you sped from the bow and went straight for the bull's eye of bliss. This phantom world gave you false signs But you turned from the illusion and journeyed to the land of truth. You are now the Sun..." from Gone to the Unseen, by Rumi |
I'm beginning to suspect that dying is the "in" thing this year. I have two funerals to go to tomorrow. |
how old was your grandmother, dave? we're about the same age and i had lost all of my grandparents by 1996. |
i'm 39. my mom is 23 years older than i am. so, 62. my oldest aunt is about 10 years older than my mom. so, 72. assuming grandma was 18 when she had her first kid, 90. she was my last living grandparent. my dad's dad, major, died when i was a teenager. my mom's dad, selfred (his buddies called him "andy"?), died while i was in my early 20s. my dad's mom, lorna, died while i was in my late 20s. my mom's mom, eva, died yesterday. out of all of them, only major died outside of some kind of old folk's home. the rest of them all spent their final years in an institution, too feeble to care for themselves or to be cared for by family. sigh. |
there's not much difference, really. |
i'm 39, too. my mom's 64, my dad's 67 or 68. my mom's dad, clifton, died of cancer when i was 29. her mother, helen, died a few months later. it's generally accepted that she had willed her cancer out of remission. my dad was an only child and his parents didn't have him until they were in their mid and late 30's. his father, frank, died when i was nine. it was the first funeral i ever went to. his mother, anne, died when i was 19 and in the hospital for a spinal cord inury. i guess i have a connoisseur's interest, wisper. total strangers will come up to me and tell me the story of their relative/friend/loved one with a spinal cord injury who shot himself or overdosed or died of complications or in some accident (like trying to cross a busy street in a wheelchair.) i just noticed that everybody in my life dies in a year ending in a 6 (or when i'm in age ending in a 9). uh-oh. |
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Ladders scare me. My alcoholic neighbor who was a physician borrowed my extension ladder to paint a gutter, fell from it and didn't drop his martini nor the paintbrush on the way down, spent two days in a local hospital rebuilding his arm, went home, and promptly died of embollism. Ladders scare me. I have the north side of the log house to strip, seal, and caulk this summer My feet hurt from the rungs, I don't like heights, and am not good at balancing a power washer, caulk gun or 10 gallon pump sprayer at 30 feet in the air. Seeking volunteers unafraid of ladders. The "untreated well of happiness." That's good, but is that well in New York or East Timor? either way, I'm glad for that happiness schtick. Could use more of that, you know. Ice the cake, dear, ice the cake. |
carrying one end of a 4 x 12 x 16 glue lam across a 6 inch top plate 40 feet above the ground did me in. i pulled several sphincters. it was a beautiful house. built on a hillside, you could drive up to the front but the backside, due to the dropoff, was supported by 12 foot piers and we were putting an exposed beam ceiling on the second floor master bedroom (which was bigger than my current home). the area recieved several feet of snow in the winter, so the beams had to be massive to support the weight. something about that job destroyed my confidence with heights. |
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liter of fucking hacker-pschorr hefeweiss. fuckin' german yodeling polkas. yeah, baby. the STUBE. hagerstown, Maryland. only good restaurant in town. you can order a FIVE LITER MUG of BEER there. perhaps after that, hagerstown wouldn't be so grim. I can't wait to get home. hi spiracle. |
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holy fucking hell. spiracle! spiracle!!! please stay for a while. how are you? where are you? what is going on in your world? you have been missed. all this talk of the pantheon... like an incantation. |
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i talked to a friend of mine on saturday about scot's death. she was closer to him in the later years than i was. she said something that resounded truth. she said his friend Joel said he was in an incredible amount of pain. and it's like i can almost hear Scot say, "well, if i don't wake up, i don't wake up." this may sound sick, but we both chuckled about that. because it's true. my bet is, he probably said exactly those words aloud to himself, just before he took that one last morphine pill. Joel was staying with Scot that night, and simply found him dead in the morning. droopy - i think that's the most i've ever heard you disclose about your family ever. can i come up to visit you some time? seriously. |
i also had a beer called terrible. made by unibroue. http://beeradvocate.com/beer/profile/22/3635/ um, YUM! it's belgian style, made in canada. |
speaking of beer and all... what happens with out bodies that the older we get the more evil the hangover? there has to be something cellular going on..i certaintly can't handle the tequila anymore..AND now all of a sudden i'm drinking WINE..that's for old farts.. i'll be 30 this year..i can remember mark making a big "I'M AN OLD FART" deal about when he turned 30... ofcourse, back in those days, 30 was old.. this year i stop counting.. |
I'd like to think that I've just become wise enough to realize how much I don't enjoy being hungover. but I enjoy getting more into wine and leaving the hard stuff behind. I'm into the savoring of good wine and beer now. I guess my partying days are over. |
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spiracle, i'm sorry, but that is just too vague to be at all curiosity satisfying. i haven't heard a peep from you in five years (or more?), you're about to turn 30, and it's just same ol same ol? bah. how about this: what sorts of things are you doing for fun these days? yes, i'm STILL in texas. very recently i had a little meltdown about missing hawaii and wanting to leave texas. it was a fun little pity party, complete with audible crying while curled up in a ball on our ghetto sofa about how i never have any real fun anymore like i used to in hawaii. i blamed not ever having fun, and blamed texas in general, for giving me a badonkadonk and making me an alcoholic - because food and booze is the only form of "fun" people have here. then i went on to blame senor for never wanting to do things that i think are fun, which is not actually true, but it was my pity party and half the fun is finding new and creative ways to feel sorry for oneself. luckily i was home alone to enjoy this little episode in solitude. |
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spiracle. come back. |
i feel like my brain is in the same place.. ofcourse, i feel more negative as the days go on but is that just age? or am i listening/watching/reading about current events too much? agh..depressing.. i've thought about getting into yoga but i heard that makes you more uptight...irony in that..last thing i need at the moment.. i've discovered i like gardening..go figure..i hunt down my swallowtail caterpillars on a daily basis...they've eaten all my parsley so that i have to BUY parsley at the store now..but hopefully i will have butterflies to show for when all is said and done... you feeling better about texas? aren't you in austin?? go climbing girl! that is what i would do if i lived there..whips you into shape...on all levels... also, how can you be depressed when kinky will be our govenor soon?! huh?! |
nothing beats crappy french wine.. and when i say crappy, i mean the shit you get in france that comes in a jug or is called the "house wine" or whatever the french call it, table wine, vino de tabloo...ha who knows..i don't know french... that stuff is good..none of that fancy expensive shit..their table wine is better than anything..and guess what?? they keep it all for themsleves and don't export the good stuff.. all that oaky shmokey stuff is crap..my wine should not taste like tree bark.. |
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jeeez. i forgot until just now you live in houston. what else are you growing besides parsley? flowers and edibles? do you have your garden at home or at a community gardens? i am growing tomatoes, italian parsley, sweet basil, yellow bell peppers, and thyme. the garden is small and surrounded by a tall wire fence to keep the dogs out. how the 75 lb black dog loves to dig! i'd have the whole back yard dug up and cultivated if it weren't for the mutts. have you ever climbed before? i've done it a few times indoors. i don't know... i don't mind the bouldering, that's kinda fun. but i don't like sports that involve lots of gear. not only that, but i'm growing increasingly intolerant of the heat. so i swim a lot. kayaking on the rivers when there's water. do you ever come to austin? you should contact me next time you think you'll be in town. i would go climbing again if there was a reason to. or we could be lazy and just go out for a drink. we've only gone to houston twice, both times for an astros game. i like to visit there. one of my good friends is from there, she moved to austin in january '05 and she misses houston. |
climbed for several years before I stopped and I was in the best shape of my life at the time even with all the beer and bad food associated with what you do "after" climbing..treadmills, lifting weights and all that can never replace the full body workout you get from climbing..and the only reason i stuck with it was because it was fun and not "working out".. but you never appreciate being in shape until you no longer are...so i hope to get back into it soon.. and funny thing is i have a fear of heights but most of the time you're not looking down, so that's ok.. I hate the gear too... i think guys love the gear thing.. they like to pick up sports that have lots of gear associated with it.. i ride my bike with regular shoes..but guys have to have the bike with the silly shoes and special pedals..extra "gear"...they take something as simple as riding a bike and turn it into "what shit can i buy for it" I appreciate the invite.. |
Constant turmoil. I wanna get into climbing too. I'm waiting to find out if I get the University job, though. It would mean free access to the climbing tower. |
Subconciously (or not) it shadows your actual ability to perform a certain task.. if you have the shit (aka gear) then 90% of people wouldn't question your ability to actually USE the shit (aka gear) properly... i think the more gear a sport has, you will find a greater percentage of pretentous people..hiding behind that gear... |
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Then I'm often ashamed to admit I own the gear, simply because I own gear for so many effing things. I think I may still own a kayak. I took kayaking lessons ten years ago and haven't been in one since. It's awful. I really want to do all these things, but there are too many of them. If I picked just one or two things, maybe I could get pretty good at them. |
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a lot of people i know stay in great shape climbing. seems to me though you have to already be strong, otherwise you can climb for like 15 minutes and get tuckered out. and that's not much of a workout. it's too hot to do anything outdoors except swim. spiracle, do you have any friends in austin? the tomato plants already have produced 9 very ripe tomatoes. they are delicious. senor's favorite salad is the one with the tomatoes and feta and olives and cucumber and artichokes and red onion and fresh basil, so i've been making a lot of that using the tomats and basil. the yellow pepper plant is not doing so well. too much rain all at once. plus i stupidly only planted one. i dug up a bed along the back side of the house to plant shrubs in our otherwise blank canvass of a yard. the area i dug up is about 35 feet long and about 4-5 feet wide. it curves about. last year a friend gave us an agave, a rootbeer plant, a cardamom plant, and a plumeria branch. i've been keeping them alive in pots until i got inspired to do some landscaping. the plumeria now has like 20 leaves on it, but no flowers yet. i planted all those in various places in the yard. the agave takes center stage, accented with a couple mountain laurels, a couple wax myrtles, a couple variegated pittosporums (we just call them "pitts"), a couple of oleanders, and one esperanza. there's also an italian jasmine, which has started to climb up the patio awning. the only thing the back yard came with was two japanese boxwoods, which are pretty, but look dumb where they were planted, so they're being relocated to the rear. also one crepe myrtle which is now blooming big pink flowers. we love the back yard. we spend a lot of time out there; sitting, reading, watching the grass grow, chasing the dogs, and trying not to get tangled in the web of our resident spinybacked orbweaver. we got engaged, officially, about a month ago and have considered getting married in our back yard. but we're probably going to go off and do it secretly. i want to do it in hawaii, but it'd be impossible to keep it a secret there. so it's looking like key west, some time before the end of the year. |
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And I agree, its too damn hot here to enjoy anything outdoors.I'm not far from the Texas border,but we are not getting any rain. I saw on the news that Winnie got 14 inches of rain, and we got zip.Ordinarily I wouldn't complain,cause with rain, comes the mosquito's,of which I have a very low tolerance.I hate the little bastards.But my pastures are getting barren,and the horses enjoy grazing,so now I am hoping for the rain. I threw gobs of seeds,watermelon,canteloupe and cucumber into my chaff piles.[the used bedding from the horses stalls]And my results have been profuse!!!!We do a daily check,and they seem to grow overnight.We are all very excited,and seem to enjoy this little project immensly.Chaff is a wonderful growing medium.YUM! |
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do you wait for the chaff to compost? crawling vine plants are fun to grow if you have a lot of space. it's hard to grow the cucumbers into summer time because it's so hot and even w/ lots of water the leaves turn brown and shrivel up so easily. i grew spaghetti squash a couple years ago by planting seeds from one i bought to cook. the squashes that grew were smaller than the one i bought, but were very delicious. and they took up huge space in the garden. |
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oh, and i don't know. it was senor's idea. there's a beach, it's close geographically, it's relatively inexpensive. |
The sweetest melons I've ever had come from the chaff. My theory is that the roots don't have to expend alot of energy,as the chaff is a rather loose medium,so the plant is able to send more nutrients to the fruit. If you want chaff,you should easily be able to get it free,ANY horse farm will gladly give you all you want. Just pile up a little mountain,add your seeds and water,and you'll be knee deep in no time.The chaff also holds the water well,so it doesn't require frequent watering. Kinda of a self sufficent garden.It grows itself! I've noticed lately that the wild bunnies are leaving little piles of cocoa puffs under my plants,but they don't seem to be eating the plants. I guess they're just stopping for a rest and a poop,and off they go. Last year a watermelon plant spontainiously started growing across our driveway.We eagerly watched its progress.But then the paranoia set in. Every time someone would drive up,we'd go running out of the house flapping our arms and yelling like some maniacs, STOP GO BACK STOP. Our visitors thought we were an exhuberent family,and really glad to see them. We weren't.We were protecting our food source,as any good pioneers would. Finally,we roped off the area,and put a bunch of sawhorses around it,and then we were able to stop worrying.But it was touch and go there for awhile. |
It doesn't seem like it should be possible, but I have a memory of taking what I thought were pumpkins (they were orange) out to the alley to throw them away because we needed to clear out the garden. I broke one of them open, and it was watermelon inside. And incredibly sweet. |
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I remember it was delicious, but it didn't come back the following year. |
but i bet you hear that all the time. could you make a chaff pile with grass clippings and dog dookie instead? i have plenty of that on hand. behind the fence there is a little bit of land before it slopes down into the creek. there are lots of trees, not enough sunlight to grow a garden, but enough space to compost. we have so many critters around already, i'm a little wary of composting back there. the most invasive critters are the toads. the little fuckers sit at the back doors on the little metal edging at the bottom. at night when we let the dogs out, there are always toads sitting there, at least one, if not more. the dogs freak them out, so they hop inside the house every single time. you'd think we'd learn and be more careful when opening the back doors, but no. i forget every single time. then i'm chasing toads around the house, and trying to keep the dogs from licking them. when she was a puppy, lulu used to eat them. well, she'd swallow them and about a minute later puke them right up. |
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...Um, I'm just curious... |
aaawwwwww. |
But, ummmmm, I'm really curious. Horse and a llama -- what do you think? |
i think a lion and a llama would be much cooler. |
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i occasionally a watermelons around here that look normal on the outside but have yellow flesh. apparently they come up from mexico. my grandfather loved them. |
ugh. |
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don't worry. it sounds haiku-ish. |
Or maybe Willy Wonka did have something to do with it. |
Oh wait, no, that was a guy pumping a melon.My mistake.............. Can't cross horses with llamas,their totally different familys.Llamas are related to camels.The split toe and all.Can cross horses with donkeys,which produce mules,which are hybrids and can't reproduce. Interesting fact: if you have livestock and coyotes are bothering [eating] them, you can put a donkey in your pasture and apparently they are natural enemies and that donkey will kill, or at least keep out the coyotes. I was at my vets office one morning,and a neighbor came in and a coyote had killed a new born foal,so I was telling him about the donkey thing, and my vet piped in,"Or a male llama will do the same thing." This was no coincidence,as my vet breeds llamas. So naturally, I wanted to get a donkey [or a llama] to keep our horses safe, and my s/o told me I wouldn't keep it past the first morning.He said that they are worse than roosters,that when the sun comes up they start this hidious braying he-haw noise and they don't shut up and you can't make them shut up because they are so stubborn. That noise thing put a damper on my desire for a donkey.[but I still think they're cute,just not cute enough to listen to that crap every morning] Nothing has ever got any of my horses,but I have 9 dogs patrolling the property,so neither man nor beast venture here uninvited. My neighbor once told me he saw a bear in the woods behind our houses, but he also grows his own pot and thinks he saw bigfoot out there, so I haven't worried about the bear too much.[but he kinda creeps me out] The joys of country living.But I love it.I love the freedom.And,you get to wear stupid outfits,and thats always fun. And Sarah,you betcha hon,I've gotten a compliment or two over the years on my melons! |
lesson the first, don't ever flirt with kazu when sem's around. |
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i love the outfits too! the boots! the gloves! i'm now envisioning a radical Vogue fashion shoot. |
like with anything..you don't start off expecting to conquer all...you build up to it slowly.. my only excuse for getting into better shape before i start climbing again is that i would be too depressed to start at ground zero again...but if i wasn't so stubborn...climbing would get me in "better shape" faster than anything else i was doing.. my parents are growing tomatoes so i feel your pain..i've done fried green tomatoes, gazpacho, salads (the kind with buffalo mozzarella)..i need a good tomato soup recipe so i can freeze the darn things instead of eating them all at once.. |
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J, use vegetable stock. it's super dooper easy to make your own, or just buy that all natural stuff they sell now, it comes in like a box, similar to the kind of boxes that soy milk comes in. don't use mushroom stock though, make sure it's vegetable stock. |
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spiracle, in my experience, tomato soup is a waste of good tomatoes, even home made. i'm not crazy about gezpacho either. it's better than regular tomato soup, but i'd much rather just make and eat salsa or pico. now marinara sauce. that is something worth making and freezing for later. in fact, it just gets better over time, kinda like the mole sauce. when you defrost it, you can use it for all kinds of stuff: add some cooked ground beef and make spaghetti, pizza sauce, bake some chicken in it, veal or eggplant parmesean. etc. i was thinking of making hot sauce with my extras, and then putting it in little jam jars and giving it away as presents. have you ever been to that big indoor rock climbing gym, in Denton i think? i know the guy who used to own/run the place. i climbed there once. it was fun. the place is actually a huge old silo that was rennovated. the rock climbing gym in austin is about a mile or two from my house. i should go back there. in fact, it's early-ish and the weather is still cool-ish. i should go for a jog. should should should |
Fresh tomatoes should be eaten fresh. Maybe chopped up with onions and cilantro like Sarah said. I have a recipe for a good sopa de lima; it's posted around here somewhere. |
also canned tomatoes add spices unless you get the organic ones. |
I'm willing to entertain the thought that delmonte is lying, however. Even Mario Batali says that using canned tomatoes is better for sauces and soups. And only get local tomatoes. Shipping ruins tomatoes. |
you will never convince me that any kind of pasta sauce is better with canned tomatoes. holy cow thats just absurd. in november, fine, its great. but in june, july, august when fresh tomatoes are so abundant.....no way. i have no idea who Mario Batali is but just that statement, he sounds like a jackass. fresh tomatos are always preferrable....even for soups and i cant anyone respectable italian with any cooking knowhow would say that. we just dethawed this leftover soup we made last summer. a vegetable pistou. the recipe calls for fresh tomatoes (on top of many other fresh vegentables) because fresh veggies are so abundant in the summer time in provence. same in california. the idea of buying any basic vegetable frozen or in the can seems insane. |
As far as I am concerned fresh tomatoes are useless unless they are local and bought at the stand from the farm where they grew. i usually only buy muir glen anyway. |
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molasses! and yeah, don't fuck with the food network stars. |
I'd rather make soup than see the tomatoes go into my compost bin because i haven't had enough time (or stomach lining) to eat one million raw tomatoes.. sarah..i think that silo-gym is in carollton or something..i've been there..i don't recomend going during the summer as it is HOT...they don't have any a/c there (wouldn't make any sense to anyway since it's in a silo.. The climb there is super easy but because it's so long, my body gave out only 5 feet from the top...takes more endurance than strength..but, you're right, it's a fun place..Most climbs in gyms or tx outdoors is only about 30 feet..i can't remember how tall the silo is, but atleast three times that height (100 - 150 feet??) |
I don't put any sugar in my sauce. |
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yeah, carrollton, right, that's it. 5 feet from the top?! holy shit, girl. that's amazing. you must be really strong. i was there in the summer. they have fans, but it's not enough. it was a sauna in there. blegh. oh, and i try to eat my salsa and pico with vegetables. only when we go out for mexican do i indulge in a few tortilla chips. but really i just use them to scoop up a huge glob of salsa. one time my dad came to visit and we took him to chuys. the gringos are silly. they take those chips and scoop up the the hot sauce all willy nilly, without testing it first. my dad can tolerate and enjoy some pretty spicy food, but i thought he was going to start breathing fire or die. |
since i had mono when i was supposed to put the tomatoes in, i will have to rely on the farmer's market for my tomatoes. store bought tomatoes suck ass. it isn't even worthwhile. who wants to eat a big plate of pasta in the summer heat? i think muir glen canned fire roasted tomatoes are fantastic. |
i think my favorite place in austin is kerby lane, though..the kerby salsa, pumpkin pancakes and hippies.. |
i've been enjoying a basic pasta dish with fresh romas in the last month that is no where near as good with canned. the issue is the inconsistancy in the quality at the store level, but places like whole foods tell you exactly where they came from, of course often you can see the quality and moreover living in a diverse agricultural mecca like california, chances are, at any given farmers market, what im buying was grown with in a 2 hour drive. also its a convenience issue as skinning and deseeding takes a few extra steps. but i also enjoy cooking, and getting my hands dirty. deseeding tomatoes is kinda like foreplay, but im digressing. muir glen is fine. i have issue about the "fire-roast" crap that everyone is slappin gon their labels these days but again, im digressing. there's this other italian brand the girl buys that is tasty as far as canned goes, i just can't think of it. fortunately my palate is not that diverse to if i were to do a taste test, id probably fail, so i admit the process of cooking plays a very very large role in the matter., |
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You should use sweetener of some kind, be it wine or sugar or ... (mind is blanking...lots of basil could work), to cut the acidity of the tomato sauce. I manage never to make the same sauce twice. My mom makes hers like so: *1 whole onion, chopped fine *how ever many cloves of garlic you can handle **sautee this in roughly 2 TBSP olive oil, until onions are clear** Add: *2 cans crushed tomatoes (truly, you can find crushed tomatoes in a can with no added ingredients, and in my recent experience staying on a farm, the organic vs. regular issue is moot) *2 TBSP sugar (here's where I get a little leery and put in less, but, again, truly, what is too sweet in the pot tastes good on the pasta) *parsley, oregano, basil (amounts are sketchy; say, 2 TBSP parsley and 1 TBSP each oregano and basil to start, and then add more to taste -- dried vs. fresh is another debate) *salt and pepper to taste **cook for at least 30-45 minutes. If you add meat to the sauce (add it at this point), you have to cook for at least an hour.** It's good and easy. And I just discovered, as I tried to make ravioli out of won ton wrappers (oh, big mistake), that if you mix above marinara sauce with a bit of your prepared ricotta mixture (whole milk ricotta, parsley, grated parmesan, kosher salt, and cracked pepper)...well, that's really good, too. In my experience, using fresh tomatoes to make a sauce makes it too watery. I had to have my dad send me dried parsley, because I cannot find parsley in the grocery stores out here. WHAT GIVES? I howl. Parsley is like the salt of the herb world. You can (and I do) put parsley in nearly anything: on steak, chicken, fish, pork, in stews, in eggs, in salad dressing, etc. (By the way, I just realized I talk to myself as I type. Oops.) |
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somebody gave me a bag of home grown tomatoes yesterday. i made a salad with the basil i grow on my back porch. when i went out to check my basil this afternoon i found that it had fallen over (it's in a pot on a metal table) and rolled off to where i couldn't reach it. it had been planted off center and had been growing toward the west for a month or so now, so i guess it was inevitable. it took me hours before i could find somebody to rescue my basil for me. |
Don't know. |
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It just finalizes and mellows the flavor a bit..smooths down the "rough edges" of the sauce.. |
and the best marinara sauce is the one your mom made when you were 7 and really wanted spaghetti and meatballs for dinner. |
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if it's too watery when using fresh tomatoes, you just gotta reduce it for a long time and/or add tomato paste. |
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your local snails thank you for the basil donation droop. those fuckers love that plant. butter makes everything better, so does whole cream. add half of cup of whole cream to your basic marinara with some crushed red pepper and youre in good. my GF is a bitchin cook and Ive managed to aquire quite a few italian dishes that are the shit...totally easy. in particular there is this brocolli sauce... 3 good sized brocooli heads chopped, get what ever stems you include, chopped slightly finer than the crowns. get a good amount olive oil warm and add 4-6 cloves of garlic, whole an done thai chili pepper or any dried spicy pepper you like, or not. brown the garlic to a nice golden brown (this is important apparently) add broccoli and sautee until there is a nice glisten on the broccoli, 3-4 minutes. add water to cover, lid and simmer for about 25 minutes. take a potato masher or an immersion blender and once the brocolli is nice and soft go just a step shy of puree. toss with farfalle or penne. and another tip the girl learned in italy, before mixing the pasta and sauce, grate your parm directly to the pasta then toss. im not sure why. i cvould share my vodka pasta recipe but im too lazy. |
Patrick, I think your vodka pasta recipe is up somewhere, but I'm too lazy to find it. Maybe we should start a recipe thread, so all the awesome recipes we've shared over the years could be found in one place. I'm going to try that broccoli...perhaps even tonight. |
food network is just as good as going to italy. and you don't have to turn in your republican party card or any of the other hoops you must leap through to get a passport. |
lots of potato flowers and saw my first squash blossom this morning. last years' carrot had a five-foot stem before it tipped. i hope it reseeds before it dies. all the neighbors have trees dripping cherries into my yard. it's fantastic. -- as far as spaghetti sauce goes, i'll start with canned and add everything imaginable to it. onions! garlic! mushrooms! eggplant! carrots! peas! there's always too much so i just reseal it in the jar. |
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i had a japanese friend who wouldn't totally mix up his spaghetti and sauce on his plate, because he liked to be able to taste them separately as well as together. pasta baffles me. it doesn't really taste like anything except wet dough or the sauce it's cooked with or smothered in. and it's about as nutritional as diet coke. |
Fuckers. I'm going to the farmer's market this weekend. |
We had a mix of gnocchi and spinach ravioli last night -- I was starving and the wife only wanted to cook the ravioli which was the 8 oz. package, and I convinced her to put in the gnocchi. It was good, with Bertolli Tomato & Basil sauce. Had that with garlic bread, made from elephant garlic. I didn't realize it, but elephant garlic is not true garlic -- rather, it's more closely related to the leek family. Them's some big faux garlic! |
using a mortar and pestle to make the garlic paste is essential as the garlic comes out so fragrent but i cant imagine how long it takes you to grind up the basil that way. i see why you dont use pine nuts without a food processor. last month i made a spinach pesto which was really fantastic. |
i used some of it just now to make cheese toast with basil and fresh 'maters. trick to mortar & pestle pesto: a bottle of wine and a cd of a rossini's "barber of seville". |
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i forgot whats its called but there a pasta dish thats so freakin simple....total poor mans food. saute some garlic in olive oil, dice whatever fresh herb you might have an dtoss in towards the end of the saute and then add breadcrumbs, ideally from stale bread you have in which you've croutini with. i wish my stomach would let me eat. |
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I asked my mom to send parmigiano romano once, and she said, "Why don't you just buy it there?" I said, "Because that's considered a luxury and we're supposed to live simply." And she said, in all sincerity, "Oh, honey, I feel so sorry for you." Anyway. Pasta = food of the gods. The earthier gods. I could eat pasta 3 meals a day, 365 days a year. The last few times I've been in Italy, I often ordered this dish called pasta alla boscaiola, which is pasta with a kind of mushroom sauce (mushrooms = other food of the gods), and they put the sauce in a pile on top of the pasta (usually pappardelle). If you ate the pasta without the sauce, the pasta itself was full of robust flavor. It was awesome. I don't know if they added something to the flour or cooked it in some kind of broth instead of water, but it was delicious. I've made pasta alla carbonara twice this year, and both times it's turned out amazingly. I don't know if it's because I'm not used to eating bacon, but damn, that was good. I can't bear the smell of roasted peppers (particularly green peppers) or stewed tomatoes. Childhood trauma. |
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doug my stomach is being turned inside slowly like the earths rotation because of the bullshit with my ex about my child. |
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are you dating a jew? or it's just a health thing? |
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this was eye opening. scroll down and check out the two raw pork chops. |
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morality? i don't understand. i don't think you mean to say you believe it to be morally wrong to eat a pig, or do you? i've heard many foodies complain about the market for lean pork being an absurd idea, but there are easy food preparation methods that will put the juiciness back in to lean pork and summon its natural flavor. and you still get a lesser amount of animal fat in your diet. i'm not afraid of animal fat though. who doesn't love a well marbled steak of any kind? only it's probably not a good idea to eat like that every day. whatever. did you know that pigs are rated the fourth most intelligent animal? excluding humans, the top three are apes, then whales/dolphins (i think the scientific class is called Cetaceans), then dogs. to me, that makes pigs seem pretty smart. but i don't know what the rating system is. |
fat is flavor. i can make a sheaf of wheat juicy. i think crows are smarter than dogs. and pigs. that's why i wouldn't eat crow. |
Pigs are genetically very similar to people. We can transplant their parts to people, and our bodies don't reject them. We use their skin on burn victims. Here in the south, we also use their skin for cracklins. I have a penchant for multi-use items. I could eat steak every day. Medium rare. Uuummmm. Pigs are also kinda cute, except for their largness. They can be house trained. I too have heard of their amazing intellegence. But, I've also heard that pigs will eat people, which kinda puts a damper on wanting to keep one for a pet. No one here should eat crow. |
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exactly. their tails wag when they are happy. it doesnt have to make sense, and im not really in a position to defend the girl's tastes as i admit to not fulling udnerstanding it myself. |
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turns out i don't need hundreds of pounds of weed every year, but a thousand gallons of ethenol does me good. |
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we're having a women's clothes swap at my house - it's been named "Rags to Bitches". i wanted to invite you to come. it's on friday, sept. 22nd starting around 6pm-ish and will probably go all night. it's far enough away that i wanted to invite you to come, if you're into that sort of thing. getting new clothes (purses, jewelry, etc) for free and getting rid of the stuff you have but don't wear. anything not claimed in the swap i'll going to drop off at the gigantor goodwill a couple blocks from my house. also, the weekend before that is ACL fest. like last year, we're only getting tickets for one day - probably saturday. if you're in town for that, let me know. |
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in gardening news i went on a two hour bike ride last night and ended up at the community gardens where i used to rent a plot for a year or so. i went by my old plot. it looked like someone after me at one time very much loved that plot, but forgot about it or gave up when it got too hot. the rosemary shrub that was there when i took over the plot was still there, almost impossibly, sort of bent over to one side. also, a flax plant i grew was still there, surviving. everything is so good and wild at those gardens. so many people had these gorgeous pepper plants and those almost flourescent purple heirloom eggplants that droop down from giant leaves like saggy boobs, in the shape of huge droplets of water. there also was okra growing wild everywhere. it looked as if some plots had no intention of growing okra, but somehow it managed to spread across borders into other garden territories. that's the stuff that will grow this time of year. there were lots of tomato plants, of course, but few of them looked very good, which was surprising. the ones at my house are, with little care, flourishing. one is over 6 foot tall now and top-heavy with giant green tomatoes. being there kinda makes me want to have a plot there again. it's so much work, and so much love, and so calming. i'm bored. i need a new hobby. |
thanks for the invite..sorry i tend to drop off from this place in big-month-long-chunks... how are you enjoying the lower humidity these days? I think the idea of fall being around the corner has put me in a better mood... this summer has been extremely oppressive...between the heat and mosquitos, my yard has turned into a weedy jungle.. But, I've had hummingbirds (for the first time) and giant swallow tail caterpillars desimating my little lemon tree (they disguise themselves by looking like bird shit...).. |
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can someone please email me the link for scrabble? i accidentally deleted the bookmark (along with a whole bunch of other bookmarks that i'm having trouble recovering...) thanks! |
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for Val, i repeat: "At last you have departed and gone to the Unseen. What marvelous route did you take from this world? Beating your wings and feathers, you broke free from this cage. Rising up to the sky you attained the world of the soul. You were a prized falcon trapped by an Old Woman. Then you heard the drummer's call and flew beyond space and time. The wine of this fleeting world caused your head to ache. Finally you joined the tavern of Eternity. Like an arrow, you sped from the bow and went straight for the bull's eye of bliss. This phantom world gave you false signs But you turned from the illusion and journeyed to the land of truth. You are now the Sun..." from Gone to the Unseen, by Rumi |
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