THIS IS A READ-ONLY ARCHIVE FROM THE SORABJI.COM MESSAGE BOARDS (1995-2016). |
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so at one point i find myself at a table talking to his wife joan and a friend of hers. their both about 60, casually well-dressed and all that, and both a bit toasted. we started talking about paschal high, the school she went to in the 50's and i went to in the 80's. suddenly her friend says, "oh! i was talking to millie the other day and you know who she ran into at the galleria? bill hamilton!" in unison, they squeal: "scrotum!" at the tables closest to us heads popped up like alerted prairie dogs. i gave them both my "please explain" look. "oh, this is a guy we both knew in high school. we always called him 'scrotum'; i don't know where he got it. i mean, we'd just be in the halls at school and we'd yell 'hey scrotum!'" Again the prairie dogs."we didn't even know what it meant back then. god, i don't even think i know what it means now. i mean, i know which part of the body it's associated with." "it's the sack part." i said. "sack part?" "yeah. um, imagine something like a jewelry bag or any small bag with two golf balls in it - the bag is the scrotum and the golf balls are the testes." she she looked off and started giggling as she tried to picture all this. "which part is the testicle?" "i think it's just the name for the whole package, i don't know." "where do you suppose he got the nickname? is it a boy thing?" "i remember back in '78 when they gave us our first 'sex education' class, we started trying to work the knew terminology into names. for at least a month after those classes, the 6th grade class was filled 'spermy steves' and 'vagina joes' and stuff like that. it's also possible they just wanted to hear you girls say 'scrotum'. there had to be a time during high school when the sentence 'i really like scrotum' or something like that escaped your lips. or maybe you stopped somebody in the hall one day and said 'hey, i'm looking for scrotum.'" they were both in tears laughing. just thought i'd share this. |
one night, while very drunk, i was climbing a fence in the rain. below the fence was a handrail and i jumped off the fence and tried to land on the handrail. my foot slipped off and i busted my nuts on the rail from a height of about six feet. i remember laying on the ground in the pouring rain holding my nuts and feeling like i wanted to puke. the shitty part was that i had to jump back over the fence again. anyway for a few days afterward one of my nuts was swollen up to double it's size. it caused me to have a fucked up walk of my own and when all my friends found out they started calling me "Tres' nut" as in Uno-Dos-Tres. |
When I was eleven I went to summer camp out in the boonies and got assigned to a cabin right next to the guys'. One night right before curfew, the guys in the next cabin decided to show off their martial arts skills in something of the manner of "Street Fighter". All fun and games until Jason accidentally kicked Graham in the nuts during a spinkick. I wasn't there, but we heard his howls from our cabin. Unfortunately, it was curfew by that time and the militant camp counsellors started making their rounds. Graham was on the floor, clutching his balls, sweating and having to bite back the pain. They ended up having to haul him up on the nearest bunk and pretend he was already sleeping. Anyways. I can only imagine at that kind of pain. |
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She's a mid-sized dog, probably in the 50-lb range - although the contact was brief and not too hard, I still danced around kinda funny for about 5 min. It's been quite a while since I got some good solid contact in my groin, but from what I remember, it's a weird kinda pain. A dull ache that's centered deep in the abdominal cavity - just below the beltline. There are sharp points, but the main part is this incredible dull throb that you can't get away from. |
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It's been a pleasant long while since I've had any. |
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"You're the ugly part." he said. "That's the ugly part?" I said. "Well...the More ugly part." he said. I really think he likes me. |
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