| THIS IS A READ-ONLY ARCHIVE FROM THE SORABJI.COM MESSAGE BOARDS (1995-2016). |
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-Nathaniel West |
and sublime, at that. i'd really like to digest Reese Witherspoon. you look at that video still of her with her little scruntched up puppy dog expression and those little turned up tits and cute-as-hell belly button and you think to yourself What the fuck could I offer her? and you kind of laugh and chuckle and run your cock through your fingers and think What couldn't I offer her? Jesus Christ! am I a man and a half or what? next thing you know you've got her legs wrapped around your head and your tongue teasing her clit and two fingertips in her hairy potter diddling her gryphondorf spot. that's right ryan, i'm dictating the terms of your divorce directly into her snotboxaphone. well, you know how those things go. you wake up eventually and you pick clumps of dried spoaty out of your chest hair and seek some water to start the rehydration before you bite into the next $3 six pack of beer pints ala trader joes. you find yourself on the beach sweating whiskey and watching dolphins or seals or staring too long at girls in bikinis. you wade into the ocean until you reach that wave that is going to take you down and you dive head first into the wall of it. the water wants to peel your flesh from your skeleton and preserve it grey and bloated for the benefits of a million crabs. your instinct takes over and your head finds air and you spit seawater and your chest expands in the cold. your mouth tastes like nori and an otter is watching you. laughing at you. you fucking lug. you find a rock with your foot and grab it with your toes and raise it to your hand. you throw it in the general direction of the otter as a wave pulls you in seven directions. the direction where your ear is bounced on the sand is most prominent in your perception of reality. on the beach again, with the sun caressing your sticky back. your eyes closed tightly, your face in the sand. a dog nuzzles your ear. someone cares if you're alright. you look up. he drops his tennis ball. the irish terrier who wants one throw of the ball from everyone on the beach. you chuck the ball into the surf. the woman smiles at you, "thanks for playing." "thanks for sharing." you find yourself saying, though maybe not loud enough to be understood. she doesn't seem to care, and keeps walking. you walk back to your apartment and track sand through your house and start in on another 96 oz trader joes beer package. you drink the first one from the can while taking a shower. the second one goes into an imperial pint glass straight from the freezer. you chop part of an onion and fry it in oil and add half a can of el pato and a can of refried beans. you eat it with tortillas and cheese and a beer and a cup of coffee. last time you went to trader joe's you bought nothing but beverages, so no meat for you for a week. thank god you have the presence of mind to buy your limit in refried beans whenever safeway has the right ones on sale. beer and beans. tomorrow is going to be wonderful. |
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I'm reading this and I could've had sex. |
on another note, damnit woman would you stop doing that to me. |
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I don't know about reading NateSmut..... |
if it IS NateSmut, and there are certain pictures in it, i will have to visit you. |
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"Jesus Loves You. Everyone else thinks you're an ass" |
or better yet, http://us.imdb.com/Name?Gyllenhaal,%20Jake Jake Gyllenhaal... the kid from Donnie Darko. He'd do well also I think. |
Screw the book, write a screenplay. or do both. Speaking of porn, we found a disc full of porn that my ex-boss had and left with a bunch of discs that belong to a project. Apparently he downloaded an entire website's worth of images to PDF. |
Yes I can. I told him goodnight and sauntered inside. I don't know if I could honestly get involved with someone who is a semiclose friend of one of my exes. My best ex, if there ever is one. I do it to you, Hal, because it makes you squirm and uncomfortable and makes me feel wanted. |
well, rather, you shouldn't. |
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see hal? theres a lesson to be learned if there ever was one she enjoys working you up to her own selfish end. |
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We just ended up watching TV, though. |
thanks |
how many people can say that? |
sem and kazoo you |
platypus and tom sorabji and blindswine |
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those are perhaps the wisest words i've uttered. |
Did Pilate's partner ever post? What about Crimson's? Where are they, anyway? |
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Once it's out there somebody has to find it. Please let us know. I'm sure most of us would like to say hello again. |
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It may be that if she wanted to talk to us, she'd still post here (sniff). |
fuck you mother fuckers and the things you don't know oh. and the things you're never going to do |
i was gonna associate you to sarah but wasn't sure if that was myth or ultra-wet reality. |
you're all in some big trouble now! and, ooh! what's the myth? or should i say, "myth" |
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i was going to say that i likes me some sarah, but it sounds so creepy i wouldn't mind if sarah made a story, she's such a better story-teller |
g'night. |
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but then again, agatha, sarah and heather have been known to drop the occassional inneuendo. i hate it when girls do that. a hottie we know recently did that with nico. on top of complimenting nico's cooking and fawning over our baby, this friend of ours said "so do you still do girls...". nico replied vaguely and I had to go home and pop one off. i hate it when chicks do that. tossing their sex around like daggers in a small room. |
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i still am so kicking myself for my scatterbrained schedule fuck-up and not being able to get together with you while i was literally in your neighborhood. next time, next time i swear. |
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i didnt mean to give this impression. |
Im not sure waht you'd call it, but it isnt open. |
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respect for nate. maybe i should have known better :P |
Patrick, I'm glad to hear your friend wasn't as crass as I had thought. And maybe she was asking out of curiousity and not as a come-on? If not....still crass. |
huh? what? no, dammit. are you all being difficult on purpose? Wait, this IS sorabji. Of course you are. |
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she's openly said she love to hop in bed with us. in the past. we met under pretexts of erotica. i saw the site she worked with, noticed she lived in our hood, asked her to model, found out we had common friends, met for drinks, became friends. she saw those nude pics of ours along the way. admitted she thought we were hot and wanted to do things.......this was over the course of the last few years. she's just openly sexual, so its not crass at all. it just is to you, for well..... it just is because its you. crass is not a word id even associate with her. she's terribly bright, witty, and grounded. id post pics of this girl from her website, but she has her address in the images thus ruining annonymity. |
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1. if you did not know already, I was not going to be the one to tell you (not specifically you spider, IE the common reader) 2. Out of respect for both of them. anyway... |
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i think people see that despite having a baby, we have absorbed being parents into who we are, and who we are just seems to jive so well having the baby. we still live our lives as before only slightly altered and instead of reservations for 2, its for 3, so to speak. so they still treat us, as they did before and I wouldnt want it any other way. Sure we don't go out to bars and such like we used to, but we still do everything else as we have always done....once the baby is in bed of course and thankfully, she's has a very predictable and accurate circadian rhythm |
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excerpts from: http://bbs.sorabji.com/messages/686/5238.html?TuesdayJuly320011153pm By sarah on Wednesday, June 20, 2001 - 03:15 pm: Whenever two or more sorabjiites meet for the first time, there shall be sex. ----------------------- By Spider on Wednesday, June 20, 2001 - 03:21 pm: There was no sex when Semillama and I met. Does this mean we've committed a sin? ----------------------- By Nate on Wednesday, June 20, 2001 - 03:26 pm: i didn't have sex with antigone or chordata, either. ----------------------- By Sadspunky on Wednesday, June 20, 2001 - 03:31 pm: Hey.... I have had no part of that action! ----------------------- By patrick on Wednesday, June 20, 2001 - 03:49 pm: im not fucking nate should i ever meet him, nor antigone, nor any of you other freaks. but im happy to watch. ----------------------- By sarah on Wednesday, June 20, 2001 - 04:31 pm: but you took nudie pics of chordata, so that sorta counts. i didn't have sex with sheila. we all break the rules, though, it's ok. ----------------------- By Nate on Wednesday, June 20, 2001 - 04:34 pm: i didn't take nudie pics of chordata! did i? maybe i did. we were on the beach at one point and this little fishing boat came up just off shore. she took off all her clothes and started jumping up and down and waving. where is that psycho chick? where do all the good sorabjiites go? ----------------------- By agatha on Wednesday, June 20, 2001 - 09:07 pm: sarah, you implied by your post that you and heather had sex. did you mean to? no sex was had by swine and i, or swine and dave, or tbone and dave, or cyst and i, or mark and i. for the record. although, swine and dave and i did get riproaring drunk, which was fun. ----------------------- By sarah on Wednesday, June 20, 2001 - 09:35 pm: i didn't mean to imply anything. i usually say what i mean. |
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sarah says what she means. |
I Put My Root Down It's Not A Put Down I Put My Foot Down And Then I Make Some Love, I Put My Root Down Like Sweetie Pie By The Stone Alliance Everbody Knows I'm Known For Dropping Science I'm Electric Like Dick Hyman I Guess You'd Expect To Catch The Crew Rhymin' Never Let You Down With The Stereo Sound So Mike, Get On The Mic And Turn It Out We're Talking Root Down, I Put My Root Down And If You Want To Battle Me, You're Putting Loot Down I Said Root Down, It's Time To Scoot Down I'm A Step Up To The Mic In My Goose Down ... blah blah blah |
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so you can't do your ex's friends nor your friend's exes, but what i want to know is, is it okay to have sex with a sorabjiite who has had sex with another sorabjiite? |
as long as there are pictures. |
:) |
(Sarah- did you finish "Everything Is Illuminated"?) |
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dammit can't we have any secrets anymore? well, i guess it's amazing that this one has kept for two and half years. yes, it's true. i bagged heather the very first time we met on an unbelievably cold michigan winter night. at my mother's house, on a single bed, in the guest loft. if you must know. and not that it's any of your business anyway, but the reason i've never mentioned it (aside from obviously being loyal to heather and out of general tact) is because it wasn't as cheap or cheesy or sordid as it might sound. i felt quite vulernable and nervous, and she was totally sweet. so don't go thinking i'm some sort of sorabji hussy and start making all kinds of rude remarks about it. it wasn't like that. that said, boy did we have a lot of fun that night! |
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(shamefully, no, not yet. due to unforseen workload, i had to put reading for pleasure on the back burner this summer.) |
Sometimes you forget how much fun this site can be. Does it count for sorabjite sex if you first hooked up with them before they became a SOrabjite, or what? |
sorry if you didn't want to tell besides i think that makes me the sorabji hussy, not you |
with a capital H. but id like to think you're both full of shit and toying with us. |
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you know what i mean and anyway, you are not a hussy, sorabji or otherwise. |
just have to get enough light to read the nail marks on the walls. |
to know about me blame it on the pisces |
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much moreso with the sharing than with the doing. been feeling more open lately- don't know why |
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doing." But sharing is doing. It's just doing sharing. |
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so it's going however it comes out a-ha! i am so tricky you would think that the sharing was as easy as the doing- but, no. |
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. One of these days I'll go back and see what I missed. |
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no more secrets! |
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secrets. feh. we'll get 'em out of you J. |
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funny contextually speaking in other news this whole -getting paid shit to work really hard- thing does suck. much. |
i mean it sucks for such a huge part of the population and the fuckers with huge amounts of money and parking spaces still pretending that it's what it's all about and tricking so many poor suckers and here i am thinking about what the fuck is the purpose.....shit. fuck it. i need more time. |
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god i love my job. love it! i have the best job imaginable. |
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i'm a web developer for a large school district. i get paid a pretty decent salary and by state contract i only work 220 days a year, not including sick and personal leave. i get to make pretty web pages, learn all kinds of geeky web application stuff, i get to help teachers and administrators, and i get to teach special session webmastering classes at the high schools. the only better job in existence is rock star or movie star. |
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oh, and i adore the people i work with and for. everyone comes to work happy, smiling, and ready to do a good job, to help each other. when mistakes are made, rarely do people blame or bitch, but rather work together to get it fixed. my boss is very smart, very motivated, has a great sense of humor, he's very loyal to his staff and treats us with a great amount of respect. his office is right across the hall from mine, but we rarely see each other. i only talk to him when i need his advice or help. and we don't have a lot of meeetings. one staff meeting per month, preceeded by paid-for lunch, and followed by happy hour. also, i get all the toys and computer equipment i want and need, no questions asked. i have full autonomy and a huge amount of latitude to make district-wide policy changes and decisions. it's like some sort of bizarre work utopia. |
man, that is HOT. (i'm back!) |
