...who can walk into a room and know confidently that every man in there wants her? And you're right in that assumption? What is that like? Does that feel good, or do you wish you could be left alone? Or are you often left alone since men might be intimidated of you? My question is: since I am definitely not that kind of woman, should I feel bad about myself? (Wait, that's not as weird as it sounds.) Am I missing something in life because I'm not a babe? Should I try to become one? Or should I be content to be my usual quiet self?

transfer to a co-ed college.

transfer to Michigan Tech. There are three guys to every girl here.

Spiderbabe, Hey listen, what ya gotta do is wait for love or lust or BOTH to come and bite you on the ass. Then... WHABBBBO... you'll be forever hooked. Don't settle, just to do it. Unfortunately that's the route I took. Thankfully I no longer settle. I have been known to even turn a few down. (*jim waits for PetRock to faint dead) Just ask Ridin. She has a whole catalog of strong-thighed marines she wants to do. *grin* ;-)

Being the It Girl has it's advantages. (Ask any supermodel.) I think every woman dreams of having the power to walk into a room & know she can get any many there to hand over the keys to his Porsche/or his platiunum card/or lock himself in a hotel suite w/her for 3 days straight & ignore the rest of the world. But even that kind of drop-dead beauty & sexual power fades. If that's all you've got going for you/you'll be in sorry shape by the time you're 40. Becuz there will always be someone younger & more beautiful right behind you. Focus on developing the traits that really matter, s, Spider. Like good character. And compassion for others. Be a good conversationalist. Be well-read. Be quick w/a bon mot or a wickedly funny joke. Sure, the gorgeous girl chick w/the fake tits & the flashy clothes is gonna get more attention from men than you do. But the type of guys who go for her probably aren't the type you really want to be w/anyway. Glamour girls are usually vapid & boring. Becuz even if they were twice as cute as they try to be/they still aren't half as cute as they think they are. And the next morning over breakfast/after the sex is thru/they haven't got any rap worth listening to.

Hmm. Compassionate, good conversationalist, well-read...if I may so, I've got those down! I'm not too quick with the repartee, but other than that, according to what you say, I'm a pretty fine catch! Man, you guys are the best! I come hear feeling all down, and I walk away feeling damned good about myself. Thanks!

I would just like to interject here with a quick story (all settle appreciatively at Jon's feet.). My sister was a model in her teens; did a lot of work for the Gap, photoshoots in Japan, etc. At my (admittedly pitiful and incessant) request, she set me up on a couple of dates with 'walk into the room and confidently know that every man there wants her' girls that she worked with. Invariably, I would spend the first few minutes of these dates panting and thinking, 'Hot damn, this girl is a 10. A 10+. A 10 to the power of 10...' or somesuch other garbage. And then they would begin to talk... Vapid, petty, dull, unimaginative and ultimately completely soft-on inducing. Every damn time. I'm not saying that every WITRACKTEMTWH girl is a total bore, but you'd be amazed at how many just coast along on their looks and do nothing to develop a real personality. And most of sex is in the head anyway. Take R.C.'s advice- you'll develop the power to cloud men's minds and make it stick...

I guess I was an It girl,and RC and Jon are right.I was lucky in a way because my mother was a twisted woman who always told me things like you can,t make a silk purse out of a sow,s ear,made me walk with books on my head,because I was self consiouse because I was taller than all the girls and most the boys.I was also skinny and was called all kinds of names because of this.But I read alot and always managed to keep a sence of humor.You said you are quiet,start talking,don,t be shy.There is something happening in this world every minute,like the trenchcoat massacre in Littlecon Colorado.Tell a few jokes,and don,t be afraid to smile,people will open up to you.when I finally realized I wasn,t a sows ear,I had a personality.I could have married a better looking man,but I picked the one who was the smartest and who was the funniest.We are still laughing after 22 years.Now you get out there and go girl.

So... Does yr husband have a (singel) brother?

sorry,just an older sister.

You know, Jon's story reminded me of something I saw on "Road Rules." (Yes, I am appropriately hanging my head in shame.) Actually, I think it was one of those Road Rules-Real World cross-over deals. Anyway, so the boys and girls go through hell and as a reward (?!) they end up at the Playboy mansion in CA. And a bunch of them are talking to one of the residents of said mansion, and the beautiful girl unwittingly reveals that she is, indeed, dumb as a brick when she claims that a friend of hers has a "prescription" to her sweet magazine. As my sister remarked at the time: "Moral: tits ain't everything"

You know... Looks sadly account for too much. Everyone *says* that a good personality and sense of humor, compassion and all that stuff is what really matter, but they don't. Not really. It's the ideal. But like most ideals, they can't be realized. Oh sure, everyone here is totally open-minded and all that... no one ever has his or her head turned by a "babe", right? These "babes" never get you to do stuff for them? Of course not. How do they get so far ahead, then? And they do get ahead. Studies show that people (that's regular folk like the people here) attribute other positive qualities to attractive people - that they are nicer, kinder, smarter than the average looking shlub. If you're still listening Spider, become a babe. You'll have an edge that you are a babe that is smart and well-read and deserve the positive attention. But you probably are missing out on something (though I don't know what that is myself) if you're not one. I'd be willing to bet, though, a lot of it has to do with confidence. If you think you're beautiful, eventually others will think so too.

i think i'm beautiful. i think all big, fat, retarded ogres are beautiful.

yeah Dave we're all beautiful ogres.

I don't remember writing that first post. The anxiety seems familiar, though.

Also, I don't have a sister. That was my best friend's sister's best friend who made that comment about the tits. I guess I was too lazy to type "best friend's sister's best friend." Even now, I just cut-and-pasted that.

I am an extreamly beautiful ogre...but I'm short.

i wouldn't call myself an ogre, so i won't. why an ogre?

I'm not an ogre. I'm a sparrow.

I'm an ogre when I first wake up.

Who isn't?

spirit dancer. fairy godmother. the journeyman.

im not. im actually in pretty good spirits once i wash the haze off. its when im tired an ogre

Brucifer and I use to live together,and he always got a kick out of waking me up,I wake up scared.Sometimes he'd bring somebody with him,just so they could see me waking up,he has a sick sense of humor.

I was a nerd as a young child, so when I hit puberty it was my goal to be the next IT girl. I did some modeling out in Cali. I finally got to the point where I didn't like the person I had become. I felt stupid at parties, and I was totally self involved. I decided to change yet again. I have been constantly working on being a better all around person. I have worked on being educated and well read. I have learned to think for myself and not follow. I still try to take care of myself, but more my mind and my soul and my entire person. I am a lot happier now, and I still wish the guys would leave me alone at the bars. It all comes with time, intelligence and self assuredness. I meet a lot of quality people now, not only shallow people. I think that most of us fit into this inbetweeen of It girl and nerd, and most of us are happy being where we are.

Old Guy Really Ecstatic. According to the voice and motion activated height device at the Science Center, I have shrunk a quarter inch in my ogre-iety.

i use the ogre term to refer to a certain phase of an acid trip where everyone, self included, looks like an ogre. it's well documented. it's an entertaining place to be if you have the stomach for it. i seem to be stuck there. har de fucking har.

it appears i'm the kind of woman who can be standing up at the bar with her boyfriend minding her own business and still have another guy in the bar send drinks over to her. it came in a martini glass. it wasn't a martini. it tasted like candy. like a jolly rancher. boyfriend not happy

well he better get used to it.

he should be happy. 1. thats one less drink he or you has to buy so you save dollars b. he's obviously out with a hottie ; )

i don't feel much like a hottie these days, but thanks. actually as it turns out i had a tragic drinking accident that night. i started off at home with Gin Sin. it's a quantity-modified recipe i got out of a smoothie book: 1/3 cup gin, two tbs cointreau, frozen fresh grapefruit segments, ice cubes. blend. then a grapefruit and vodka at the bar. then the free drink from the stranger. then: we went down to the cheesy piano bar where kevin's roommate jeff is a bartender. when i walked in, immediately i noticed the new frozen margarita machine behind the bar. it was loud in there so i just pointed. jeff aparently offered to make me a fresh one, but i didn't hear him. next thing i know, there's a yummy frozen margarita in my hand. it was strong. i couldn't finish even half of it. and then i was Capital D Drunk. not falling over drunk, but drunk. and i stopped drinking even though we went on to at least one more bar after that. by the time we got back to kevin's house, i felt as if i had been poisoned. i went to bed at 2 a.m., slept til 10 a.m., went back to bed at 11 a.m. and slept til 3:30 p.m. i didn't barf, but my head pounded, and i felt seriously ill. the rest of the day i couldn't get my brain to focus on anything. later in the day when i saw jeff, he told me that they have to put extra alcohol in the drinks in the machine to keep them from freezing up. extra tequila, right? no, no. Everclear. fucking GRAIN ALCOHOL. well, holy fucking shit. did they really need to do that? i mean, they don't have to put Everclear in the slurpee machines at 7-11 to keep them from freezing up too much. well, i had no idea, i never would have touched the stuff if i had known. i think they ought to be required by law to warn people that there's grain alcohol in those things. my god, no wonder i felt like that. i really was poisoned. i still feel shitty. he told me they do that to the frozen hurricane drinks in new orleans, too. let this be a warning to us all.

i was over at syrup.org a while ago to catch up - you look really hot in the picture outside of ruta maya. i have a shirt just like the one kevin is wearing, but mine's a brighter red. it was a present; i rarely wear it, and when i do it's in the most ironic way possible. still, just knowing that someone else who owns a shirt like that can get a beauty like sarah makes me feel that i still have no chance in hell. on the subject of texas news: they closed down the caravan of dreams last night. it was one of the few worthwhile music venues in fort worth. it's being taken over by some expensive restaurant i never even knew existed whose former residence had been destroyed in the tornado. it's a damn shame. brave combo played the last show.

I've always been the IT girl for my husband... I never really noticed if I was for anyone else. But I don't really care about any other guy :-)

I'm right there with you Pamela. My husband posted some pics of me on Rankpeople.com. I get fanmail from strangers but the only ones that matter are the ones I get from my husband.

Here's a thought on what to do when a stranger sends drinks to the lady with her gentleman: The gentleman consumes the drink, then does one of those flippant salutes with two fingers off the eyebrow, with a wink thrown in for good measure. Good times.

or you can do like my wife has done, gone over to thank him, and asked for one for her husband. "Hey my husbands thirsty too you know sweetheart." you should have seen the look on that dumbasses face. shit. ive seen it all. most guys are too dense to look for rings. ive been sitting right next to her, when guys asked her to dance, buy her a drink and so forth. it doesnt bother me too much, but shes says i tend to stare testosterone. maybe. this is the kind of shit, as a guy, you have to be a fucking man about. nothing to get pissed off about. thats silly. its nothing to get in a fight over. most men, are respectful of other males. its the the small small insignificant price of being with an attractive woman.

You know what's really sick? Being stuck in a bar completely sober and eight months pregnant and some asshole's trying to buy you drinks and hitting on you,EIGHT MONTHS!

You should have told him it was a tumor.

droop, kevin also wears that shirt in an ironic way, so i know exactly what you are talking about. luckily he doesn't take himself too seriously when it comes to that, and i've been able to make him wear some funny things just for shits and giggles. the shirt goes with my red velvet pants, which i'm sorry to report are a little too snug these days. in any case... guys like you, droopy, you don't need red velvet shirts. you have a brain, a sexy intellect, a mind that you use. you are interesting and you have a great sense of humor. in my opinion that beats the hell out of any fashion statement you could make - ironic or not.

HMMmm--- seems to me a women with looks is born to be stupid!! I don't think so, take a step back and look at all the things women do to be beautiful!! Do you think all those hotties just wake up being drop dead gorgeous??? Some females just have it and some just don't no matter how hard they try! I'd much rather have common sense and be Bridgette Bardot gorgeous, than to be an ugly intellect!!! Intllects are quite boring themselves I might add!!

so....like are you busy Sat.?

Intellect is boring to those who don't have it, just like most other traits. Often including beauty.

I love it when people criticize smart folks and clearly demonstrate to the world how dumb they are.

Thats why Mother Nature produces cretins. Its for the contrast.

Intelligent conversation comes so seldom with beautiful soft skin in the candylit darkness of one's soul. Everyone wants to be wanted. To be accepted. To be touched in a way that says, 'you matter to me.' Just a thought. (nekkid goats listening intently to Fluffy's plan for world dominion in acapella) Hairball bullets, leather felt cannons ablazing, waving their flags of Chesires grinning. Then there will be dogs who are denied basic education and everyone will eat mice cream. Yeah, everybody.

Who cares what any of you look like I think a wooden clothes pin would be more interesting than you

I feel sorry for those of you who think that a beautiful woman cannot be intelligen or intellectual. I can honestly say I have met all sides of the board. The sad thing is people are judging this based on physical beauty. Growing up I was the ugly duckling or the nerd. Come high school, I was the It girl for our little small desert town high school. For me beauty is not judged based on size, and I am one of those skinny women who don't have to wear make up or spend hours on my hair. My cousin is one of the most beautiful people I know, and she doesn't get a second glance because of her size. It saddens me. She is 27 and has only dated 2 men in her life. People complain about beautiful people, but they still date them. I have never lacked for a man to be with, but my cousin, who deserves much more, hasn't had a date since her fiancee left her to share his roommates girlfriend. That was 7 years ago. If you complain about us who are lucky to be beautiful, then maybe you should look elsewhere. I find this to be a double standard in our society that sickens me. Get to know someone, find out what they are like on the inside, and ignore the outside. If you like what you have come to know, then go out with them, but don't judge based on physical appearance. Beautiful or Ugly on the outside, doesn't matter. Hating someone for being beautiful is just as shallow as ignoring someone because they may not be at first glance.

Well said, Eri. And did you get the link I posted for you? I don't remember which board/but it was the one whre you mentioned considering a hysterectomy becuz of yr endometriosis. There's a procedure now called Uterine Ablation to treat that/& keep yr uterus. This was the link I posted: http://www.gynalternatives.com/ablation.htm