today it is november 23rd. i have been having my period since the 29th of october. not continuiously, but about two days here, a week there, etc. it goes away for a day or two and then it is back. prior to the 29th of october, i had not had sex for well up to 6 months. that night of the 28th however i got lucky. but stragely enough before this started, i was almost over a month late. needless to say it was a lot less messy without it. i have no history of this, i am 23 years old. i havenever really kept close track of my period, but i have known about what time it should happen. i am not on any medication or birth control. about the only thing i can account for me having is a whole lot of stress, possibly for the past 3 months, but i am not sure if that is the only thing to blame. any ideas?

Definitely go and see your doctor right away. You need to know what this is all about.

go to a doctor.

It sounds like a ride in the stirrups is what you need,dearie.

Ha. Thats an interesting way to put it. I had to go to the Doctors this morning to get another pill repeat, he told me I was looking good... I told him not to thank me but my personal trainer, and he burst out laughing. nice man.

I think the laughing was his way at accepting what he thought was rejection... I can't make the assumption that it was rejection, but under the basis of what I know he thought it was and he was taking it quite well.

Hal, have you been taking your medication? The doctor laughed because it was bloody funny. End of story.

The doctor laughed because he was in the middle of a nervous breakdown. His wife had just run off with her personal trainer. End of story.

Either that or he was hitting on me and I ruined it by making a joke. So he was laughing sarcastically.

moonit - is your doctor attracted to you, do you think he was making a sexual advance towards you? Shy girl - did you make that appointment to see your doctor yet? I'm going to keep bugging you until you do!!!!

I kinda got the feeling he was. He was a bit creepy. And I actually go to a clinic and you never _ever_ have the same doctor twice, so that was a bit ookie. At least he wasnt like the last doctor I had who told me I was a beautiful girl with a weight problem.

I don't think a doctor should be telling his patient that she is "looking good" or that she is a "beautiful girl", I think that's crossing the boundary. The idea of a doctor being turned on when examining his patient is kind of repulsive, however having said that, doctors are only human. This really disturbs me, I'm not sure why. Has anyone thought about these kinds of questions?

I had a doctor that I went to since I was 7 and when I got breasts would put me under a heat lamp topless,no matter what I had wrong with me,even if I needed stitches,I had to take my top off.The old perve.

So, if a doctor is human, he's creepy? What if the doctor was a she? Would she be creepy under the same circumstances? Should he/she be inhuman? Wouldn't that be creepy? Which would you rather have: a creepy human doctor or a creepy inhuman one?

some people can't help but be creepy she doctors can be creepy better then being totally incompetent. or maybe a zombie or whatever 'inhuman' might be. maybe a robot, but robots mostly work at places like the bank. once i said, "no." i was told to get undressed...etc. i had an ear-ache or something. it did not require examination below my neck. the person looked at me for a second like, 'did she just say no?' and then said "oh, okay." i've also been to a woman doctor who was very touchy and spoke almost sensually. it was weird, but i kind of liked it. everytime she went to do something she would say, "do you mind if i...?" or, "is this okay?"

Oh my god I've created a monster... I've had creepy female docters, when I was 16 I had a physical done, and the examiner was female. Granted I know you all think that every 16 year-old male in the world would love to have some extreamly good looking female Dr. tell him to "turn your head and cough." For some reason however I think she derived some sort of pleasue from it. It scared me half to death. I'm not quite sure why however, I mean I lost my virginity when I was 15, so it wasn't anything THAT new. It was scary at any rate. I do think it is overstepping some boundries when a docter makes a pass at a patient, telling a patient that she "... is beautiful." is definatly a pass as far as I'm concerned. Yes, Dr.'s are only human, but for them to effectivly be Dr's, the have to seperate some ammount of humanity from their work. For example thinking to themselves... "I'd really like to give it to her." And then acting upon that thought would be displaying the wrong sort of "humanity" needed for the job.

So, what qualifications did you need to become a member of the thought police, Hal?

if i can make the effort to suspend my sense of personal privacy and self-protection well enough to let somebody take a clinical look at my body and poke things in it, they had damn well better be able to suspend their lust or prurience or whatever personal impulses they have well enough at LEAST to not make remarks to me. Doctors have TOO DAMN MUCH POWER and they use it against their patients interests far too often. No wonder doctors get sued so much. No wonder people just decide not to ever go back to one. Face it, when you are helpless or in pain or facing death, the marketplace isn't much good to you, you're stuck with whoever's hands you are in and the doctors know it.

Maybe we should turn the role of the doctor over to machines, at least for simple diagnosis and treatment recommendation. That would take those pesky emotions out of the picture real quick.

antigone, is this conversation hitting a nerve for you? i once had a doctor when i was twelve and getting a physical for summer camp, who held a mirror to my vagina and showed me all the parts, touching them with his fingers. do you find that acceptable, antigone? can we just chalk something like that up to normal human impulse? upon reflection, i felt invaded. if someone studying to become a doctor doesn't feel that they can overcome their impulses and act respectfully with their patients, they need to seriously think about their motivation for becoming a doctor.

Well, I just think it's unrealistic to think that doctors won't have human reactions. I assume you would want them to be compassionate and caring yet no other emotions are acceptable? Doctors are not saints. As to your experience, agatha, I don't have enough information to say whether your doctor's actions were acceptable or not. That's partly my point. I hear many posters ascribing motivations and desires to moonit's doctor with little or no evidence. Is that fair to the doctor in question? Is it fair to make sweeping generalizations like, "Doctors have TOO DAMN MUCH POWER and they use it against their patients interests far too often." If you've got preconceptions like that you're bound to have a negative experience with a doctor no matter what the circumstance. When I was fourteen I had a bit of day surgery on my big toe, and the doctor let me watch while he sliced it up. When I was twelve I had major surgery on my sinuses and was sedated, but the doctor let me listen to his dictation afterwards. These were positive experiences for me. Should they have not been?

Umm, wasn't Shy Girl's out-of-whack hormones supposed to be the topic at hand? Or did she solve that problem already? SHYGIRL: If you're not on the Pill & not sexually active/then it sounds like you have serious hormonal imbalance -- which can happen at anytime in life/even in yr 20's. I went thru the same thing in my early 30's. (Jeesh! When I say it like that it sounds like it was eons ago. I guess turning 40 really does make me officially "old".) My period wd last for days & days/then stop for 4 or 5 days/then start again. I spent $250 (I was freelancing in NY/hence no health insurance) to see an ob-gyn (male/I might add) who gave me a pelvic exam & a Pap smear (no problems there)/never did any blood work/then solemnly pronounced that I had a 'hormonal imbalance". Duh-uh! I politely left his office & did not return. I went home/pulled out my old herb books & came up w/combo of 3 herbal extracts: wild yam root/donq quai & chasteberry in a 2:2:1 ratio. Started taking 3 eyedroppersful 3x a day. After 4 or 5 days/the irregular bleeding stopped completely. I continued w/the herbal extract for 3 wks. 'til my normal period started/& stopped taking the herbs while I was menstruating. On the 5th day of my period/I started taking the extract again. I was regular-as-rain after the first month. After 2 mos. w/no irregular bleeding/I cut back to 2 doses a day/morning & evening. Eventually I stopped using the chasterberry (it was the most expensive extract of the 3)& just took a 1:1 combo of wild yam & dong quai once a day/starting the day my period ended & stopping the day my next period started. I still use the same herbal combo/but now I don't need to take it every day -- only during the time that I'm ovulating/to keep from spotting. I've been using these herbs for almost 10 years now w/no side-efefcts/no problems & no more crazy menstrual cycles. See a doctor to make sure everything is okay. But once you get a clean bill of health/you might want to do a little research & treat yrself w/herbs. It's cheaper than going on the Pill & you don't need to hassle w/doctor visits to get an Rx. (But the herbs have ZERO CONTRACEPTIVE EFFECT -- they are NOT an herbal version of the Pill. If you're going to be sexually active you'll still need to use b.c. And I wdn't mix those herbs w/oral contraceptives. Condoms are yr best -- & safest -- bet.)

I've never had a bad experience with a doctor, male or female. I don't really feel threatened by them at all. I'm sure some of them have had emotions about me that might not be right, but I kind of expect that, they're only human. At any rate, no doctor has ever made an unacceptable pass at me, ever...and I think a lot of people see harassment where it isn't.

My main concern with a doctor is that he/she treats me as an individual. For example, the guy I currently see, I'm not so sure of, since he introduces himself everytime I see him. and once again, I need to agree with R.C. and her advice for Shygirl. The herbal solution she recommended, from my days at GNC, contains two of the herbs that are known to contain phytoestrogens (correct me if I am wrong, it has been a while since I thumbed through an herbal.)

Shy girl, please make an appointment to see your doctor now. It sounds hormonal, but you should check it out.

The only mildly bad I've experienced was a woman who apparenly needed to get an unusually close look while going through the turn and cough procedure during a physical. I was used to a blind and well-practiced grab, without the visual scritiny. I don't know that it was sexual or anything, though. It coulda been her first time. I had a nurse compliment me on my arms when I got a shot... I don't think she was hitting on me. I tend to preffer the more human-like doctors... The ones that can understand why you're scared or uncomfortable, and try to make you feel more comfortable. It's sad that some doctors take advantage of that, but I think it's quite a minority. If it makes you feel better, request a doctor of the same/opposite gender. I've never heard of someone being turned down.

Its important to have a physcian you're comfortable with.They're just like anyone else,good guys,bad guys,twits,jerks,kindly.Take the time to find someone who you feel comfortable sharing personal issues with. They are not all reputable.Remember Dr. Richard Schmidt? The doc who injected HIV + blood into his mistress?Well,I worked at the hospital he was at.Luckily,we worked different areas.But I'd see him around the hospital.He gave me the creeps.One time it was just him and I in the elevator,[before the HIV thing],and I ended up getting off 3 floors early,he didn't do anything I could put my finger on,just made me uncomfortable.Just making small talk,asked me how the preemies were doing,and said he'd have to come see them.I was thinking,"no,don't".Just weird.Can't say anyone at the hospital was surprised at what he'd done.Shocked,yes,but surprised,no.Amazingly,most of his patients stood by him,before he was convicted.We all thought he'd skip town,but I think he was so arrogant,that he really didn't think he'd get convicted.

i thinks thats most logical czarina. Moonit's doctor is questionable, i was wondering if this was the same one that made the overweight comment before. Before she clarified, i was thinking this guys needs an assful of tact. What would make some of us unccomfortable, would make others ok. I have never had any doctor do anything in appropriate, even when I have had clamydia tests...from both male and female doctors. Being me, I prefer female doctors. I think they tend to be a little more gentle, its easier to project a familiar feminine/motherly image to them. The mrs. tend to prefer female doctors because too often male doctors have told her, when she has mysterious female troubles, like shy girl, that "you are fine" or "it doesn't hurt now does it". A doctor not listening to his patient is a big no no.

on the comment about the doctor holding up the mirror thing. that happened to me when i was 12 too actually. but it was a female doctor, and i was more shocked, just because i didn't know why she was showing it to me, cause i didn't really care all that much. but then again i didn't know what i was doing there in the first place my mother tricked me into going. i remember the lady talking to me. "so are you having your period yet?" "no." "are you looking to get on birth control?" "uh, no." "why exactly are you here?" "my mom said i needed an exam. should i leave?" it freaked me out. my mom said i had to make another apointmen a month later, i didn't. the lady scared me, but only because as a catholic girl who didn't go through perocial, i was ashamed of genitalia and not at all interested in how it worked. but she raised my chair up and put a light on it and held a mirror so i could see and she told me what the stuff was and it was all weird to me. i did discover mastrubation for another 2 years tho. in update to the problem. it is gone ain. but it seemed like the real thing, with cramps, headache and all of that. and it lasted the normal duration. but before this it wouldbe at the begining of the month and now this should put it at the end. all i know is that it is a god damn gold mine working in feminine hygine products. those bastards, i should take stock in that shit.

Skip the hygiene products. A woman who isn't sexually active doesn't need to douche more than once a month (unless you're something other than condoms as b.c.). If you feel like douching at the end of yr period/that's okay. But plain old white vinegar (2 tablespoons) & water in one of those quart-sized hot water bottle contraptions is the best -- & cheapest -- thing to use. Fugeddabout the pre-packaged stuff. It's a rip- off.

I remember in clinicals one of the instructors telling the women, "Go home tonight and carefully look at your genital area. Use a mirror, study it carefully, think about what is there." Many women really don't know. I have been asked many times to catheterize female patients, becuase the female nurses could not find the urethra. Maybe that is the reason your Doc did the mirror thing. As far as the Doc getting his jollies, possible but not likely. I know when I get into "medical mode", a vagina is a vagina is a vagina is a vagina..........NO THRILL....actually I get a bigger thrill from stage IV stasis ulcers with the patient septic from necrotic tissue, but I'm weird.

I am not going to make the generalization about all docters... Yes I had a bad exp. but I didn't let it ruin my outlook on them all. Shit I've had two operations since then, a knee reconstruction and I had steel plates grafted to my left upper sinus. Both of those docters were some of the nicest people I have ever know, and one was a female and one was a male. As for the whole mirror thing... Sorry wrong gender, can't really comment on that one.

companies like Kotex and tampax and the like. the will never go out of business. kinda like the waste management sytems, those guys will always have a job until we figure out how to vaporize things. but the tampon and the pad are staples of femininity. 12 times a year. granted there is menopause, which takes away some of their customers, but women are said to out number men (51/49) so there are girls being born and going through puberty constantly. did you know that in australia they tax tampons as "luxury" items? that puts them on the same level as chocolates and magazines and the like. so they think it is something you don't really need. which i guess can be true, some women roll their own tampons and kick start their dildos. but i don't think i personally could "rough it". speaking of which, i was reading some mag and someone has come up with the most digusting thing. pads for thong underwear. that is dirty. but they say you can't stop progress.

and another thing. i think that the reason that female genitalia is often so mysterious is one, women are often given images of how you have to hide it, and it is something you have to pretend is not there. like FDS, what is that for? to cover up your feminine scent, and the commercial says "fds woman so very confident." how interesting. confident but ashamed of her own scent? your scent is like one of those built in features so you don't have to use too much persuasion to get some action. packed full with natural come hither undertones. but products like douche and FDS tend to send a message of "you can't stop being repulsive on your own, let man made chemicals fix that." the last issue of Bust magazine i read talked about the vagina and how guys should not encourage their partner to douche or the like, because it is insulting to a woman. i have to say i agree. i don't expect to taste like honeydew melon or smell like holy insense, but whatever i come across on the senses it is uniquely mine. so how bout that mr smarty-pants professor? pbbth. it also said that for guys to make a woman aware if there are certain smells or tastes, cause that could be something of a problem. i just hate the "unknown hole" persona the vagina can get. by boys and girls alike. i just wish there had been a les awkward way to find out about mine.

girls are also getting their periods, and starting puberty earlier these days..... from what i understand....douching is a bad idea, it can throw your bodies natural chemistry off balance. most woman who have commented on the matter to me do not recommend douching at all...saying its unecessary.

I can't stand thong underwear,it's ass floss.

the thing that freaked me out about the doctor is that i was twelve, for starters, and that he used his FINGERS. he could have used one of those wooden sticks or a culture swab or something, but he chose to use his fingers and touch me directly on my vagina while he explained it. i had no warning that he was going to do it, either. if someone did that to my daughter without asking my permission first, i would fucking freak.

Better than using his tongue, I guess...

OWWWWW!!!!

Or giving her a hot beef injection...

I agree with Agatha, I would probably kill the man. I insist on women doctors only for my girls.

Ladies - ask Mavis about pads. Ask real nicely and maybe she'll make you some.

dougie, where do you live again? i'm coming out there to kick your ass.

Sorry agatha, but I couldn't resist. I live in Long Island, NY.

Agatha gets around Dougie,better watch it.Agatha,wasn't your mom in the room? He should have been reported to the police.At least my perve doctor just looked.

i disagree. i think that using the hands/fingers is not really bad. like when you go to the doctor and he touches you other places, like the abdomen or something. there is more sensitivity in the fingers. and every woman is a little different, the nuances of each vagina can not always be accounted for. if he used a cotton swab or something, i can't say it would have felt good at all. i would think of all the things to use to point out intimate place on one's body, i would want something inanimate least. no something cold, and not something pointy. the clamps for the pap smear? a tooth pick? a metal pointer? i dunno, when someone is poking and proding in my holiest of holies, i don't want them to drop something in there that isn't attached to something else. i have seen the scary shows where people have stuff left in the like clamps. no way.

what about when you were twelve? dougie, the ass kicking will have to wait til i come to the east coast again?

The issue seems to be asking permission first, and I think when the anatomy to be examined is private, a clear explanation of what the doctor is about to do and why is required.

I understand how the doctors actions could have been construed as inapropriate, but I have a question, was the mom there in the room during the examination as is with most children under the age of 16 or so? If she was then there was really no need to worry, but again even if she wasn't, the old bastard couldn't have done anything and gotten away with it anyways. Christ what kind of mother wouldn't ask "Well how did it go?" after her daughter sees a profesional about those kind of issues?

my mother was not in the room. when i told her about it after the exam, she was pissed. we called him "wierd dr. walker."

Is the bastard still alive?

Agatha: yr experience w/that gyn exam must've been some years ago. You're what, 28 or so, right? Becuz I can't recall having a pelvic exam by a male doctor in the last 10 years w/out a nurse or other female staffer being in the room. They're subtle abt it/but EVERYBODY does it now/just to CTA. (Why did yr Mom take you for a pelvic at 12 in the 1st place?) As for the douching thing: Once a month is all that's recommended. For anyone who's had a period/you know that as natural as it is/you *do* feel cleaner if you douch after that last day. But back in the pre-AIDS days of my roaring 20's/ nobody used condoms/so douching was a must. Otherwise you'd be oozing all the next day. (Amazing how hard those little jizms fight to STAY up there!) Frankly/I can't WAIT for menopuase so I can be rid of this monthly annoyance once & for all. But I'll never go back to pads & all those ruined undies. I thought abt trying those reusable cotton tampons. But who needs *more* laundry in their life?

All this talk abt pelvic exams makes me think of Nate. Is he still around? Still engaged?

yes he is still around, dont know about engaged though

As this is my area of expertise,having worked Labor & Delivery,OB Gyn for many years I'm somewhat knowledgable in these areas.There is no physcian I know,who would examine a female patient without another female in attendance.The liability is just too high.As for this business of just spontainously deciding to take young female patients on a "scratch and sniff" expedition through their nether-regions,this is most inappropriate,and should be reported immediately. Developing a healthy sexuality is a very fragile thing,and should be tempered by a sensative practioner.When information is requested,it should be offered in an understandable manner,I frequently use "lay terms" when teaching.As supplying information in a too sophisticated manner,is useless.

czarina is there any truth to what i said earlier about douching? i must know. RC i think in the first half of the century women douched immediately after sex as a perceived method of birth control. I tend to think your body doesn't need douching.....unless you have an illness and balance gets offset, like say from antibiotics.....i also think it a generational thing. No woman i know advocates doing it, my wife certainly doesn't.....although i do know a chick who puts honey in her cooch...we already talked about her though

that's what i thought. rc, it was not a pelvic exam, it was a physical for camp, and the guy just randomly decided to teach me about my vagina. also, i'm 32, about to be 33 in six days.

I am 32, about to be 33 in 7 days. Agatha and me are sagittarii with the same chinese zodiac too. We are legumes from different pods. I didn't know that or I forgot it and now I'm a bit weirded out. I have to think about this.

Also, I actually like the idea of an initial machine diagnostic, especially if it uses nanotechnology to image me completely and do a complex chemical analysis in like 4 minutes so my lab tests and stuff wouldn't take weeks to come back. And no more stirrups. I never have had a bad experience with ye olde pelvic. Once my nurse practitioner showed me my cervix and told me what was interesting about it and I wasn't really all that interested, but she seemed to want to edumacate me a la our bodies, our selves and I liked her so I let her have her couple minutes with the speculum and mirror and my attention. If she'd shown me how my liver or kidney looked, I might have been more interested. But lungs, heart, cervix, gallbladder...enh.

christ...and i thought i had to leave my pride at the door upon going in for a physical

Patrick,you are correct.Douching is ill advisable from a medical standpoint.We advise against it. RC is also correct,if you mush douche,a mild vinegar solution will correct the vaginal ph. There have been theories that by adjusting the vaginal ph,acidic/basic,that you could improve the chances of getting a baby of the sex you prefer. Douching works on the same principle as having frequent high colonics.Frequent washings/douchings alter the vaginal environment.It destroys some of the good flora etc.There is a specific environment that vaginas thive in,[and we all want healthy tooties],and if that environment gets thrown off,it can lead to all kinds of tootie troubles.

phewwwwwwwww!!!! thanks this is important stuff all hail a healthy cooch

"if you mush douche" Would that be corn mush douche with maple syrup? MMM...corn mush douch with maple syrup...

Well,I always try to be vaginally obliging,when the situation calls for it.

i like women who are vaginally obliging

[Dougie,we have our own kind of special southern mush down here.Nothin's quite as lovin,as something from the oven............]

Save some for me. I'll be right down. I love mush.

a corn meal mush douche will not cure a yeast infection. but MMM MMM! good muffins!

I think I'm going to be sick.

Don't worry Hal, it's an acquired taste. You'll get over it.

Why does Miss Piggy douche with honey and vinegar? Because Kermit likes sweet and sour pork. If you don't douche, then what do you and your mom have to talk about when walking on the beach, or horse back riding?

ROTFLMDTO. (Roll on the floor laughing my diarrhea tampon out.) No shit: When I was in grade school, a male kid in my class had diarrhea so he used one of his mother's tampons to "control" the flow.

ok this is getting outta hand

How so?

Yukka, as I used to say when I was six. Tampons are horrid enough. One of my friends in college thought that if you douched with Coca Cola, you wouldn't get preganant. YUKKA.

BLAHCH!!!!!! Ok, I'm better now, nothing like blowing...BLAHCH!!!! Fuck... This is outa hand.

Just got off the phone with Brucifer,thanks to J,[I've been avoiding his call,cause I didn't want to be recriminated for not being in Phx.]And he made me remember a "feminie issue" that his sister,and our nasty,ill tempered friend Punkin once experienced.Remember this one,J? Years ago: Punkin took off to Calif,to spend 2 weeks with some newly met guy,which we all advised against.Well,she comes back,all in a tizzy,seems like this guy was into some unusual sex,and the products of it left her with a severe case of veneral warts.[Don't think we didn't have to hear about that,over and over and over again.] So she goes to the GYN,and he paints her bottom with some medication,that will burn off the external small warts,and tells her to go home,and to be sure and wash it off in within an hour and a half. Well,Punkin,being the pleasant person that she is,gets mad at some driver,for cutting her off,and while engaged in flipping off and yelling at said offender,smacks into the back of another car,which in turn,starts a small chain reaction of rear-endings. She,to this day,can see no humor in this story.We NEVER bring it up in front of her.Needless to say,her medicine wasn't washed off at the appointed time,and unfortunately,her tootie paid severe consequences.

That reminds me of an old thread,if I recall she didn't mind sharing the "love",even after she knew she had those warts,it was around then that I decided to clean up my act.I really can't say that I think much of Punkin.