why do people always want to know what some people is doing about and they always try to dig out things like "What is your pay now?", or else they're probably wondering how high is your education, what job are you doing.... sometimes I feel hurt especially those relatives that come over to compare the dignity of their children with the one that they are visiting... please help how to resist them?

When old relatives would come up to me at family weddings, nudge me in the ribs and say, "you're next" in apparent refernce to the fact that all my cousins are seemingly married, and yet I am not, I would get really pissed off. Then I learned to deal with it. I began doing the same to them at family funerals. As for people wanting your to perpetually defned your worth to the human race, I find that half truths work marvels. Life is all relative. When people ask how I am doing, I say that I am making great cash, and loving work. Even if my personal definition of "great cash" is having enough left over after paying bills for a sack of sliders from White Castle, and "loving work" means that I have recently concluded another week without killing anyone with the loaded gun I have begun keeping in my desk. I am happy. And I know that that answer can have one of two results. Either the person leaves genuinley happy for me, or they slink back into their horrible little lives, a little more defeated that I am doing as well as I apparently am. In either case, I rest easy.

gecko, what a great post!

Yeah, Gecko. "Great work."

super!

duper!

prime!485650789657397829309841894694286137707442087351357924019652073668698513401047237446968797439926117510973777701027447528049058831384037549709987909653955227011712157025974666993240226834596619606034851742497735846851885567457025712547499964821941846557100841190862597169479707991520048667099759235960613207259737979936188606316914473588300245336972781813914797955513399949394882899846917836100182597890103160196183503434489568705384520853804584241565482488933380474758711283395989685223254460840897111977127694120795862440547161321005006459820176961771809478113622002723448272249323259547234688002927776497906148129840428345720146348968547169082354737835661972186224969431622716663939055430241564732924855248991225739466548627140482117138124388217717602984125524464744505583462814488335631902725319590439283873764073916891257924055015620889787163375999107887084908159097548019285768451988596305323823490558092032999603234471140776019847163531161713078576084862236370283570104961259568184678596533310077017991614674472549272833486916000647585917462781212690073518309241530106302893295665843662000800476778967984382090797619859493646309380586336721469695975027968771205724996666980561453382074120315933770309949152746918356593762102220068126798273445760938020304479122774980917955938387121000588766689258448700470772552497060444652127130404321182610103591186476662963858495087448497373476861420880529443

pi! 11. 0010010000111111011010101000100010000101101000110000100011010011 0001001100011001100010100010111000000011011100000111001101000100 1010010000001001001110000010001000101001100111110011000111010000 0000100000101110111110101001100011101100010011100110110010001001 0100010100101000001000011110011000111000110100000001001101110111 1011111001010100011001101100111100110100111010010000110001101100 1100000010101100001010011011011111001001011111000101000011011101 0011111110000100110101011011010110110101010001110000100100010111 1001001000010110110101011101100110001001011110011111101100011011 1101000100110001000010111010011010011000110111111011010110101100 0010111111111101011100101101101111010000000110101101111110110111 1011100011100001101011111110110101101010001001100111111010010110 1011101001111100100100000100010111110001001011000111111110011001 0010010010100001100110010100011110110011100100010110110011110111 0000100000000001111100101110001010000101100011101111110000010110 0110001101101001001000001101100001110001010101110100111001101001 1010010001011000111111101010001111110100100100110011110101111110 0000110110010101011101001000111101110010100011101011011001011000 0111000110001011110011010101100010000010000101010100101011101110 0111101101010100101001000001110111000010010110100101100110110101 1001110000110000110101010011100100101010111100100110000000010011 1100010111010001101100000010001100101000011000001000010111110000 1100101001000001011110010001100010111000110110110011100011101111 1000111001111001110111001011000001100000001110100001100000001110 0110110010011110000011101000101110110000000111101000101000111110 1101011100010101011101111100000110111101001100010100101100100111 0111100010101111001011111101101001010101011000000101110001100000 1110011001010101001001011111001110101010010101011010101110010100 0101011101001000100110000110001001100011111010000001010001000000 0101010111001010001110010110101000101010101010110001000010110110 1011010011001100010111000011010000010001010000011110100011001110 1010000101010100100001101010111101111100011100101110100110010011 1011001111101110000101000001000101100011011011111011110000101010 0010101110101001110001010101110101110100000110000011000111110110 1100111001011100001111100001011010011011100001111001001100011110 1010111111010110101110100011001101101100001001001100111101011100 0111101000110010010100111000000100101000100101011000011001110111 0011101110001111010010001001100001101011010010111011100110101111 1100010010111111111010000001101101100110001010000010000110010011 0110000111011000000010011100110011111011001000011010100110010001 0100100001111100101011000110000001011101111011001000000000110010 1110111110000100010111010101110111101001100001010111010110110001 1101110000100110001000110000001011101011011001010001101110001000 0010001110001001001111101000000111010011100101101010110011000101 0000111101101101011011111111001110000011111101000100001000111001 0010111000001011010001001000001010100100100001000010000000000100 0110100111001000111100000100101010011110000111111001101101011110 0010000111000110011010000100001011110110111010010110110010011010 0110011100001100100111000110000110101011110100111000100011110000 0110101001010001101000001101001011011000010101000010111101101000 1001011000001111101001110010100010101011010100010011001110100011 0110111011101111000010110110110000010011011110100011101111100100

geek! #include <stdio.h> #include <string.h> #include "css-descramble.h" typedef unsigned char byte; /* * * some tables used for descrambling sectors and/or decrypting title keys * */ static byte csstab1[256]= { 0x33,0x73,0x3b,0x26,0x63,0x23,0x6b,0x76,0x3e,0x7e,0x36,0x2b,0x6e,0x2e,0x66,0x7b, 0xd3,0x93,0xdb,0x06,0x43,0x03,0x4b,0x96,0xde,0x9e,0xd6,0x0b,0x4e,0x0e,0x46,0x9b, 0x57,0x17,0x5f,0x82,0xc7,0x87,0xcf,0x12,0x5a,0x1a,0x52,0x8f,0xca,0x8a,0xc2,0x1f, 0xd9,0x99,0xd1,0x00,0x49,0x09,0x41,0x90,0xd8,0x98,0xd0,0x01,0x48,0x08,0x40,0x91, 0x3d,0x7d,0x35,0x24,0x6d,0x2d,0x65,0x74,0x3c,0x7c,0x34,0x25,0x6c,0x2c,0x64,0x75, 0xdd,0x9d,0xd5,0x04,0x4d,0x0d,0x45,0x94,0xdc,0x9c,0xd4,0x05,0x4c,0x0c,0x44,0x95, 0x59,0x19,0x51,0x80,0xc9,0x89,0xc1,0x10,0x58,0x18,0x50,0x81,0xc8,0x88,0xc0,0x11, 0xd7,0x97,0xdf,0x02,0x47,0x07,0x4f,0x92,0xda,0x9a,0xd2,0x0f,0x4a,0x0a,0x42,0x9f, 0x53,0x13,0x5b,0x86,0xc3,0x83,0xcb,0x16,0x5e,0x1e,0x56,0x8b,0xce,0x8e,0xc6,0x1b, 0xb3,0xf3,0xbb,0xa6,0xe3,0xa3,0xeb,0xf6,0xbe,0xfe,0xb6,0xab,0xee,0xae,0xe6,0xfb, 0x37,0x77,0x3f,0x22,0x67,0x27,0x6f,0x72,0x3a,0x7a,0x32,0x2f,0x6a,0x2a,0x62,0x7f, 0xb9,0xf9,0xb1,0xa0,0xe9,0xa9,0xe1,0xf0,0xb8,0xf8,0xb0,0xa1,0xe8,0xa8,0xe0,0xf1, 0x5d,0x1d,0x55,0x84,0xcd,0x8d,0xc5,0x14,0x5c,0x1c,0x54,0x85,0xcc,0x8c,0xc4,0x15, 0xbd,0xfd,0xb5,0xa4,0xed,0xad,0xe5,0xf4,0xbc,0xfc,0xb4,0xa5,0xec,0xac,0xe4,0xf5, 0x39,0x79,0x31,0x20,0x69,0x29,0x61,0x70,0x38,0x78,0x30,0x21,0x68,0x28,0x60,0x71, 0xb7,0xf7,0xbf,0xa2,0xe7,0xa7,0xef,0xf2,0xba,0xfa,0xb2,0xaf,0xea,0xaa,0xe2,0xff }; static byte lfsr1_bits0[256]= { 0x00,0x01,0x02,0x03,0x04,0x05,0x06,0x07,0x09,0x08,0x0b,0x0a,0x0d,0x0c,0x0f,0x0e, 0x12,0x13,0x10,0x11,0x16,0x17,0x14,0x15,0x1b,0x1a,0x19,0x18,0x1f,0x1e,0x1d,0x1c, 0x24,0x25,0x26,0x27,0x20,0x21,0x22,0x23,0x2d,0x2c,0x2f,0x2e,0x29,0x28,0x2b,0x2a, 0x36,0x37,0x34,0x35,0x32,0x33,0x30,0x31,0x3f,0x3e,0x3d,0x3c,0x3b,0x3a,0x39,0x38, 0x49,0x48,0x4b,0x4a,0x4d,0x4c,0x4f,0x4e,0x40,0x41,0x42,0x43,0x44,0x45,0x46,0x47, 0x5b,0x5a,0x59,0x58,0x5f,0x5e,0x5d,0x5c,0x52,0x53,0x50,0x51,0x56,0x57,0x54,0x55, 0x6d,0x6c,0x6f,0x6e,0x69,0x68,0x6b,0x6a,0x64,0x65,0x66,0x67,0x60,0x61,0x62,0x63, 0x7f,0x7e,0x7d,0x7c,0x7b,0x7a,0x79,0x78,0x76,0x77,0x74,0x75,0x72,0x73,0x70,0x71, 0x92,0x93,0x90,0x91,0x96,0x97,0x94,0x95,0x9b,0x9a,0x99,0x98,0x9f,0x9e,0x9d,0x9c, 0x80,0x81,0x82,0x83,0x84,0x85,0x86,0x87,0x89,0x88,0x8b,0x8a,0x8d,0x8c,0x8f,0x8e, 0xb6,0xb7,0xb4,0xb5,0xb2,0xb3,0xb0,0xb1,0xbf,0xbe,0xbd,0xbc,0xbb,0xba,0xb9,0xb8, 0xa4,0xa5,0xa6,0xa7,0xa0,0xa1,0xa2,0xa3,0xad,0xac,0xaf,0xae,0xa9,0xa8,0xab,0xaa, 0xdb,0xda,0xd9,0xd8,0xdf,0xde,0xdd,0xdc,0xd2,0xd3,0xd0,0xd1,0xd6,0xd7,0xd4,0xd5, 0xc9,0xc8,0xcb,0xca,0xcd,0xcc,0xcf,0xce,0xc0,0xc1,0xc2,0xc3,0xc4,0xc5,0xc6,0xc7, 0xff,0xfe,0xfd,0xfc,0xfb,0xfa,0xf9,0xf8,0xf6,0xf7,0xf4,0xf5,0xf2,0xf3,0xf0,0xf1, 0xed,0xec,0xef,0xee,0xe9,0xe8,0xeb,0xea,0xe4,0xe5,0xe6,0xe7,0xe0,0xe1,0xe2,0xe3 }; static byte lfsr1_bits1[512]= { 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff, 0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff,0x00,0x24,0x49,0x6d,0x92,0xb6,0xdb,0xff }; /* Reverse the order of the bits within a byte. */ static byte bit_reverse[256]= { 0x00,0x80,0x40,0xc0,0x20,0xa0,0x60,0xe0,0x10,0x90,0x50,0xd0,0x30,0xb0,0x70,0xf0, 0x08,0x88,0x48,0xc8,0x28,0xa8,0x68,0xe8,0x18,0x98,0x58,0xd8,0x38,0xb8,0x78,0xf8, 0x04,0x84,0x44,0xc4,0x24,0xa4,0x64,0xe4,0x14,0x94,0x54,0xd4,0x34,0xb4,0x74,0xf4, 0x0c,0x8c,0x4c,0xcc,0x2c,0xac,0x6c,0xec,0x1c,0x9c,0x5c,0xdc,0x3c,0xbc,0x7c,0xfc, 0x02,0x82,0x42,0xc2,0x22,0xa2,0x62,0xe2,0x12,0x92,0x52,0xd2,0x32,0xb2,0x72,0xf2, 0x0a,0x8a,0x4a,0xca,0x2a,0xaa,0x6a,0xea,0x1a,0x9a,0x5a,0xda,0x3a,0xba,0x7a,0xfa, 0x06,0x86,0x46,0xc6,0x26,0xa6,0x66,0xe6,0x16,0x96,0x56,0xd6,0x36,0xb6,0x76,0xf6, 0x0e,0x8e,0x4e,0xce,0x2e,0xae,0x6e,0xee,0x1e,0x9e,0x5e,0xde,0x3e,0xbe,0x7e,0xfe, 0x01,0x81,0x41,0xc1,0x21,0xa1,0x61,0xe1,0x11,0x91,0x51,0xd1,0x31,0xb1,0x71,0xf1, 0x09,0x89,0x49,0xc9,0x29,0xa9,0x69,0xe9,0x19,0x99,0x59,0xd9,0x39,0xb9,0x79,0xf9, 0x05,0x85,0x45,0xc5,0x25,0xa5,0x65,0xe5,0x15,0x95,0x55,0xd5,0x35,0xb5,0x75,0xf5, 0x0d,0x8d,0x4d,0xcd,0x2d,0xad,0x6d,0xed,0x1d,0x9d,0x5d,0xdd,0x3d,0xbd,0x7d,0xfd, 0x03,0x83,0x43,0xc3,0x23,0xa3,0x63,0xe3,0x13,0x93,0x53,0xd3,0x33,0xb3,0x73,0xf3, 0x0b,0x8b,0x4b,0xcb,0x2b,0xab,0x6b,0xeb,0x1b,0x9b,0x5b,0xdb,0x3b,0xbb,0x7b,0xfb, 0x07,0x87,0x47,0xc7,0x27,0xa7,0x67,0xe7,0x17,0x97,0x57,0xd7,0x37,0xb7,0x77,0xf7, 0x0f,0x8f,0x4f,0xcf,0x2f,0xaf,0x6f,0xef,0x1f,0x9f,0x5f,0xdf,0x3f,0xbf,0x7f,0xff }; /* * * this function is only used internally when decrypting title key * */ static void css_titlekey(byte *key, byte *im, byte invert) { unsigned int lfsr1_lo,lfsr1_hi,lfsr0,combined; byte o_lfsr0, o_lfsr1; byte k[5]; int i; lfsr1_lo = im[0] | 0x100; lfsr1_hi = im[1]; lfsr0 = ((im[4] << 17) | (im[3] << 9) | (im[2] << 1)) + 8 - (im[2]&7); lfsr0 = (bit_reverse[lfsr0&0xff]<<24) | (bit_reverse[(lfsr0>>8)&0xff] << 16) | (bit_reverse[(lfsr0>>16)&0xff]<<8) | bit_reverse[(lfsr0>>24)&0xff]; combined = 0; for (i = 0; i < 5; ++i) { o_lfsr1 = lfsr1_bits0[lfsr1_hi] ^ lfsr1_bits1[lfsr1_lo]; lfsr1_hi = lfsr1_lo>>1; lfsr1_lo = ((lfsr1_lo&1)<<8) ^ o_lfsr1; o_lfsr1 = bit_reverse[o_lfsr1]; /*o_lfsr0 = (lfsr0>>7)^(lfsr0>>10)^(lfsr0>>11)^(lfsr0>>19);*/ o_lfsr0 = (((((((lfsr0>>8)^lfsr0)>>1)^lfsr0)>>3)^lfsr0)>>7); lfsr0 = (lfsr0>>8)|(o_lfsr0<<24); combined += (o_lfsr0 ^ invert) + o_lfsr1; k[i] = combined & 0xff; combined >>= 8; } key[4]=k[4]^csstab1[key[4]]^key[3]; key[3]=k[3]^csstab1[key[3]]^key[2]; key[2]=k[2]^csstab1[key[2]]^key[1]; key[1]=k[1]^csstab1[key[1]]^key[0]; key[0]=k[0]^csstab1[key[0]]^key[4]; key[4]=k[4]^csstab1[key[4]]^key[3]; key[3]=k[3]^csstab1[key[3]]^key[2]; key[2]=k[2]^csstab1[key[2]]^key[1]; key[1]=k[1]^csstab1[key[1]]^key[0]; key[0]=k[0]^csstab1[key[0]]; } /* * * this function decrypts a title key with the specified disk key * * tkey: the unobfuscated title key (XORed with BusKey) * dkey: the unobfuscated disk key (XORed with BusKey) * 2048 bytes in length (though only 5 bytes are needed, see below) * pkey: array of pointers to player keys and disk key offsets * * * use the result returned in tkey with css_descramble * */ int css_decrypttitlekey(byte *tkey, byte *dkey, struct playkey **pkey) { byte test[5], pretkey[5]; int i = 0; for (; *pkey; ++pkey, ++i) { memcpy(pretkey, dkey + (*pkey)->offset, 5); css_titlekey(pretkey, (*pkey)->key, 0); memcpy(test, dkey, 5); css_titlekey(test, pretkey, 0); if (memcmp(test, pretkey, 5) == 0) { fprintf(stderr, "Using Key %d\n", i+1); break; } } if (!*pkey) { fprintf(stderr, "Shit - Need Key %d\n", i+1); return 0; } css_titlekey(tkey, pretkey, 0xff); return 1; } /* * * this function does the actual descrambling * * sec: encrypted sector (2048 bytes) * key: decrypted title key obtained from css_decrypttitlekey * */ void css_descramble(byte *sec,byte *key) { unsigned int lfsr1_lo,lfsr1_hi,lfsr0,combined; unsigned char o_lfsr0, o_lfsr1; unsigned char *end = sec + 0x800; #define SALTED(i) (key[i] ^ sec[0x54 + (i)]) lfsr1_lo = SALTED(0) | 0x100; lfsr1_hi = SALTED(1); lfsr0 = ((SALTED(4) << 17) | (SALTED(3) << 9) | (SALTED(2) << 1)) + 8 - (SALTED(2)&7); lfsr0 = (bit_reverse[lfsr0&0xff]<<24) | (bit_reverse[(lfsr0>>8)&0xff] << 16) | (bit_reverse[(lfsr0>>16)&0xff]<<8) | bit_reverse[(lfsr0>>24)&0xff]; sec+=0x80; combined = 0; while (sec != end) { o_lfsr1 = lfsr1_bits0[lfsr1_hi] ^ lfsr1_bits1[lfsr1_lo]; lfsr1_hi = lfsr1_lo>>1; lfsr1_lo = ((lfsr1_lo&1)<<8) ^ o_lfsr1; o_lfsr1 = bit_reverse[o_lfsr1]; /*o_lfsr0 = (lfsr0>>7)^(lfsr0>>10)^(lfsr0>>11)^(lfsr0>>19);*/ o_lfsr0 = (((((((lfsr0>>8)^lfsr0)>>1)^lfsr0)>>3)^lfsr0)>>7); lfsr0 = (lfsr0>>8)|(o_lfsr0<<24); combined += o_lfsr0 + (byte)~o_lfsr1; *sec++ = csstab1[*sec] ^ (combined&0xff); combined >>= 8; } }

god I love it when you guys talk dirty.

2001-04-27 - 10:01 p.m. Friday, April 27, 2001 - 10:50 pm: I try to help her but something tells me she must does this on her own, at least most of it. So, I guide her whenever needed, and feed her when she can't do that herself, and help her to the bathroom. Some of the time is just spiritual food, when she is empty, empty, empty. I just guide her to where the source is when she forgets. She forgets more now. And even in her forgetting, she can guide me too. That's the funny part: even when she is lying there dying she can help me. It is absolutely wonderful to be able to do this together I think, though it is sad.

mortality is the most powerful agent of catharsis. we are all there, on the brink, every day and yet it's power evades us until it is too late.

I appreciated my mortality, every day, for years. Then I got on the stairmaster and it stopped.

You, me, mortality and a staircase, and a stick of butter, and something else. Is it over yet? What was the question?

i had sex with my mortality last night. she screamed and wept and came catharsis all over my egyptian cotton sheets.

I just got egyptian cotton sheets. They're purple.

The question, a--hem...---was (I think): How to resist "them" -- those prying individuals who want to know things that are none of their business, or at least, not really all that important anyway. Hmmm. Stairmaster notwithstanding, how about soybean oil, cultured buttermilk, and a little calcium chloride (epsom salts will do), a couple egg yolks whole and uncooked, swilled down with a little vodka...as a good catharsis? Stay close to the bathroom and you'll change those sheets less.

How about confronting the peeping kinitwits directly? "Why are you asking me this question?" "Do you think your comment has anything to do with the reality of me actually finding a mate?" "Are you pathetic enough to believe that making such a comment, knowing I'm at this wedding by myself, will somehow accelerate my finding a mate? "Why do you have to say something like that, get your rudemonkeyass away from me!!" "Do you want to die you crotchety ole wind bag?" "I hate you!" "Why don't you be a good aunt and get me some sausage balls and whisky you fatass?" "My therapist says it's meddling asses like you who keep me in his office?" I find when someone asks such a rude annoying question, an equal if not greater response is not only fair, but appropriate.

yeah! lower yourself down and prove yourself no better than any of them!

no, i just have the incessant desire to make people realize how idiotic they can be. i'll use visual aides if neccessary.

i think it's better to just act like an adult. it is especially effective when directed at people who have been adults throughout your childhood. highlighting concepts such as respect generally proves enjoyable.

i admit to often be at odds with family, and the loyalty that is supposed to come with someone described as family. Rather, I've never felt the desire to condone (or at least silently condone through inaction) asshole behavior family or not.

i don't condone asshole behavior. in fact, taking the high road tends to end it. at least, among people who desire to be adult. try it, patty.

Usually, I say: "I'm not really sure that this should concern you, but thank you for enquiring."

its not that i haven't opted for your method. more than im probably leading you to believe. sometimes i just get in those moods.

My father often says he'll never marry me off because I'm too bloody ugly. I tell him it's because he turned me off men forever when I saw him naked in the shower when I was five. Or I'll make some reference to all the incest and beatings. But then we share the same terminally sick sense of humour.

When inappropriately enquiring minds try to pry into my personal life,my favorite response is,"Oh goodness,my private life is much more adventuresome than YOU could ever imagine!" I accompany this with a wink,a BIG shit-eating grin,and an exaggerated ass-swing as I saunter away.[then I find a discreet hiding place,so I can enjoy the look of perplexity on their dim faces] Life has its small rewards.