a friend of mine is going to open up a second-hand store and she wants help naming the place. she's going to sell old clothes, furniture, crafts, anything she can lay her hands on. I'll be providing a few items (she even wants me to make a shrine like i made for spider, though i don't know if i'm capable of having that kind of inspiration again). she needs a name. the stores going to be on traffic circle called bluebonnet circle. she's thinking of working "circle" into the name. (i suggested circle junk.) her name is mickie cooles (real name something like mikalya) and might want to work that in too, like "cooles' place". (i suggested circle cool.) let your imaginations go wild. just whatever you would name a second-hand shop, doesn't have to have circle or cool in it.

Second time around. Second chances. Last Chance. Thrift Depot. Unique Boutique. Bargain Barn. Donation Station. Happy Hunting. Repeat Performance. Those are a few stores in my area. Maybe they will provide some ideas for you and your friend.

the junk redistribution project

I like Circle Junk. heheheh Drroop, you know what I found online? You can order big tin shrine frames, like real authentic antique frames, in the shape of a hand or the Sacred Heart or a cross, for like $11. It might take me a while to find the link....but wouldn't that be cool?

that does sound cool. i might not quite have found god, but i have developed a fascination with religious artsy stuff. my aunt is going up to alaska next week; i asked her to bring me back an inuit totem or something. i like dave's idea. though i think "unique boutique" will be closer to what mickie will go for. this place is going to be more like a "junktique" shop - i'm offering an old cobbler's stand, a post-office sorting box, and an apple crate all from around the 30's. it will be a junk shoppe, thank you. then again, my other suggestion was "cool junk," and then we record a jingle to the tune of the capitols' "cool jerk."

How about "I'm not Ken Lay's wife!"

Cheap Junk See My Junk Buy My Junk Junk-tion Circle (man the light bulb burst above my head on that one. no charge.) Mikkie's Junk-tion (hell I might as well run with it now) Coole's Junk-tion

Memories From A Time Gone By Get 'Em While They Last Purple Monkey Dishwasher Bluebonnets N' Stuff (Sem -- do they still have Waterbeds N' Stuff in Coyumbus?) Wallmart Coole Stuff I Can't Believe It's Not Free Useless Flea-Infested Crap (my personal fav -- if one of the junk places near me had that name, I'd be there in a second.)

live sex acts on stage

how about "limbo" ?

"purple monkey dishwasher" i had the greatest laugh ive had in a while on that one. where is that phrase from again?

i liked dougie's last two. i don't know about fleas, but i know that if people buy my stuff then the incident of silverfish infestation will rise in this city. yesterday i went over to the house i rent out. while driving down the street, i see the diswasher from the house (my dishwasher) on the side of the road with a "free" sign taped to it. when i talked to my renter (james) he told me that one of the burners didn't work. but his brother had one he could give them. and that he needed a place to live for a while. could he move in even though his renter contract said he couldn't move anyone else in? what the fuck. just get my dishwasher off the side of the road.

I've heard that before, too. It's at the end of something. The end of a phrase or name. Right? The Simpsons?

the burners on my dishwasher don't work, either.

the afterburners crapped out on my refrigerator recently too. pretty soon i'll loose hyrdaulics all together.

http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=%22purple+monkey+dishwasher%22

Yeah, it's from the Simpsons, but I think it's also the standard answer from that game played in elementary school (I think it was called "I've got a secret") where the teacher gives out a seed phrase to the first child and he whispers it to the next child etc. around the room to see how the original phrase gets transformed. In the Simpsons episode, it's the one where the teachers are outside striking and Bart whispers into the first teacher's ear that Skinner says the teachers will crack any moment. When it finally gets to Krabapple, she says "Skinner says that the teachers will crack purple monkey dishwasher."

RIGHT now i remember.

That was on a few nights ago. Ralph Wiggum, how I love thee!

i meant to say oven in that last post. fuck.

I remember a beauty salon in Baltimore called "Curl up & Dye" 2nd hand cool Crop circles Rejuvination National Collective

Curl up & Dye -- that's great! So is 2nd Hand Cool. My favorite out here is for a pet groomer: "Snip Doggy Dog". Also, there's "Realistic Dreams" for a beauty salon -- the single women who go there probably also use "Lowered Expectations Dating Service" from SNL. Yeah, I was wondering about that droopy. So what happened, did you let the guy's brother move in? I subletted my apartment one summer -- I couldn't find anybody, and finally, right before I was leaving, this girl called saying she and her girlfriend could only afford like $200 less than I was asking. So I let it go at that. I get back and learn from the neighbors that there were like 6 people crashing there the whole time. Plus they trashed the place. So I kept their 2 month security deposit. HA! Take that, you fuckers!

Oh yeah, there's another beauty salon called "Inner Citi" with an accent on the last "i" instead of a dot. First of all, this is about as far away as you can get from the inner city, and what the fuck's with the accent?

i've been so confused lately, dougie. the dishwasher reference in your post made me remember that i had an uninteresting major appliance story to tell, but never managed to subsitute the names. yeah, i let them move the guy in. i like these two renters - james and charlene. nice, clean cut kids, i'll tell yah. they've been there two years and it's been great. james has even fixed the place up. the last two were 30-something salvatore and his 40-something bottle blond wife with a non-working 19 year old son who had an illegitimate child somewhere. not to say they weren't good people, but the other two are better. and charlene has breasts that defy credulity - female friends of mine even remark upon this. when she stands in front of me it's like being in a 3-D movie. wasn't "lowered expectations" from mad tv? i used to watch that all the time to see corky and the juice pigs. we have a resale shop around here called "sunny and share." there's also one called "mudpuppy" and one called "coyote" something. i don't know about the beauty shops.

Oh shit, that's right, I think it is from Mad TV. That show used to be good -- it's gone downhill IMO the last couple of years. Plus they haven't had Corky and the Juice Pigs on for a long time. Sunny and Share is pretty good too. Hell, as long as your tenants pay the rent, and have 3D hooters, sounds like a good deal to me.

Next Time Round (get it? round... circle...)

there's a store in town called "dumpster values". i like that.

How about Crap Circle?

i was thinking along those lines agatha...something to do with dumpster diving. The Dumpster Dive or something like that

heh. mik asked me if i knew any literary references with "circle" in it. all i could think of was brecht's "the caucasian chalk circle." the caucasian crap circle. probably not. i think i was too leading in my original post. mickie doesn't seem be too receptive of names with junk, crap, dumpster, etc. in it. 2nd hand cool was good, though. but i think she wants something more obscure and misleading like "get 'em while they last purple monkey dishwasher." but less words. pretend you're naming a band. happy birthday sem.

"mickie doesn't seem be too receptive of names with junk, crap, dumpster, etc" well thats what happens when you ask sorabji. Im surprised she didnt go for the ambiguous "Junk-tion" suggestions i made. I thought that quite clever purple monkey dishwasher.

i think it's just insecurity. this isn't l.a. or seattle where there's a dumpster chic. it's a traffic circle in cowtown near a very greek college where all the kids wear the latest fashions. the names of resale shops here tend to fall into three categories: thrift, tradin' post, or whimsical. she's going for the third. if'n it was my place, i'd call it circle junk. but it ain't.

Me too. Hey, if someone walked in snickering, you'd know they got the joke and would treat them well. Band names, huh? I like the Black Heart Procession. How about Black Heart Possessions? You've got your shrine market built in. Ah, but then you'd get idiots interested in the black arts coming by. Man, this is tough.

Mickie Sells Texas (One Coole Piece At A Time) Raindrops On Roses and Bright Purple Monkeys Tiffany's Odd Lots The Cows Came Home To Roost (whatever that means) Recycled Nation Ye Olde Coole's Bitchen' Stuffe Decidely Dreck & Detritus My Stuff's OK, You're OK Shit, I had some better ones last night, before IE took a dump. I know these are too stupid and wordy to use, but the Raindrops on Roses from My Favorite Things is kind of catchy.

dougie is the only one who understands me. hey spider, dig this: mexican tin. it's a place down in austin.

Yes, that's what I was talking about! They'd be cool to use, though your space to decorate would be limited. About the store....who's the target market? The college kids? The town people?

Ye Olde Coole's Bitchen' Stuffe ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ That made me laugh out loud.

target market? i don't know - the flea market crowd. part of the inspiration for this store is all my time running flea market stalls. when i did that, i had people come all the way from chicago to buy the stuff i had from the 100 years my family have been in this state. and just people like me. my dining room table was salvaged from a bbq place that had burned down. my coffee table is the trunk my grandparents had brought from ireland. all the stuff i made your shrine out of were literally lying around on tables and shelves. you know that little iron cauldron? a friend of mine has one like that about 3 feet tall. he converted it into an outdoor grill last week. maybe it's the old west pioneer spirit. we just can't let this stuff go to waste. to us it's all just raw material.

OK, then, see, you're talking about adults who are serious about what they want. So you want a name that will appeal to antique hunters, not 19-year-old frat boys. My work here is done. :)

Anybody remember that thread where somebody asked people here to name a band? It was a while ago -- at least a year. There was a lot of good stuff there -- maybe one of them would work, or could be re-worked into something that would work. Glad you liked Bitchen Stuffe, Spider.

It was the "Ye Old Coole" part that got me. The thought of a young woman referring to herself like that made me giggle.

what about crap shoot? anything with the word bazaar is always good, too.

i would call it "September 10th"

So Droopy, did your friend decide on a name?

last weekend the wine-soaked estrogen brain trust came up with "shaggy chic." when i did a word search on the 'puter, i found that phrase in a lot of carpet ads, so we dropped it. mickie skipped town this week; maybe she'll decide on something while she's gone.

Plus they may think every thing in the store has to say "Zoinks!"

maybe that could be the name of the store: Zoinks!

I like that. Zoinks! I'd go in.

"Zoinks!!" makes me think of those mall stores called Gadzooooks!

theres a store in new hampshire called "Vacman and Bobbin" that sells vaccuum cleaners and sewing machines.

Coveted Cache Chronological Cache Catalytic Cache Connoisseur Cache Good Cheap Stuff

hey! look what i found!!

There's a fruit and vegetable store out here called "Biggest Banana" which never fails to make to snicker when I pass it.

Somebody thought this was trash.

there is a store here called "the Merchant of Tennis" which always makes me laugh, it sounds like it's right out of the Simpsons. That and this big fancy meat store down in the rich area of town called "the Butchery". lol call it Sept.10th oh god, that made me laugh.

A new bar on Sunrise Highway I saw the other day: Effen Gruven. Betcha there's some farvegnugen going on there.