| THIS IS A READ-ONLY ARCHIVE FROM THE SORABJI.COM MESSAGE BOARDS (1995-2016). |
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SOOOOOO... I have been seeing a new lady friend since new years. We haven't yet slept together, although we are going out of town together this weekend (so heres hoping :) ) but things seem to be going very well. we have a lot of similar intrests etc... last night over dinner, Joy asks if we are exchanging gifts for valentines. my initial response is WTF?? presents? on valentines? what is this xmas all over? but then of course I think for a second and say 'well of course i was thinking of getting you something. but that doesn't mean you have to reciprocate.' Now, i have to get her something that says i care abt her, but with out making her think A: that i'm cheap B: that i'm not attentive C: that i am rushing (or trying to rush) her into commitment, or whatever..... <sigh> why is this so hard for me :( So any help is appreciated, and please feel free to ridicule me first. i do it all the time so it won't offend. |
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oh god. valentines day. what a fucking waste. get her flowers. end of story. |
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This is where you take the female at her word and not get her anything for v-day, and then O my god, look out!!! |
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You know how I feel about this holiday. I have always hated it. I loved what you got me last year, but I wasn't with you. The year before you were being offered the "sweetheart special" at Applebee's with Darren away on a business trip. I have so many BAD, HORRIBLE memories of this holiday and it just seems like a money making scam for card companies. I like flowers, but you got me two new ones recently. I need to re pot them....get me some potting soil for Valentine's Day! I figured we would get some chocolates for the kids and leave it at that. Besides, you got your present last night! |
Hence the post(s) asking for advice, I need it. But i do believe flowers is the way to go here. |
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bake her a pan of brownies and present with a single rose. Little pointless teddy bears are classic, too. or not. Boycott. It's such bullshit. |
Make every other day better. |
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if only i lived on a desert island. |
another is "i am wrong". maxims are contrived bullshit. |
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actually, i was starting to get excited about valentine's day when your post began with "go to your local butcher and get..." honestly, if my boyfriend/SO got me a big thick juicy hunk of meat from the butcher for valentine's day, i'd say that's a holiday worth celebrating. otherwise, forget it. i'm boycotting it like i do every year. i bake myself a fudge cake in a heart shape pan, open a bottle of wine, and lay in bed and watch a movie. if any man, woman, or child attempts to make plans with me that night, they are out of luck. |
im, generally absolved from the holiday itself because im already pouring on the love. for her birthday, i got her two Mark Rothko prints. Not originals sadly (got bank?) but nice prints that she wanted to have framed for the house. |
Dave, you feel that the day is contrived, how, by whom, to what end? and please have something better than the usual corporate greed gripes. if anyone can come up with a better reason it will be from the Sorabji crowd, i am sure. |
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I also know she says she doesn't celebrate V-Day and doesn't like it, but there is that little man-instinct that says that maybe you shouldn't really fail to acknowledge it somehow. It's harder when the lady says she doesn't want anything special done, but the guy doesn't want to be a dick who can't read between the lines. Somehow it seems easier when the lady DOES find Valentines day to be special. I don't know, this is the first Valentine's Day I have ever been dating someone for. |
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And I say bake her special brownies. Guaranteed booty. |
last night we went out to a sports bar with some of the boy's old pals. Two of them are engaged, and later the chicks showed up. All's well until one of them thumps one of those huge bridal magazines down on the table, and the two of them go all hen-tastic and start clucking over dresses and comparing rings. WHAT THE FUCK Who brings a damn bridal mag to a sports bar? on hockey night, no less. those things are the size of a phonebook! Which leads me to think- where else do they take that thing? I bet they wondered why i didn't even pass their table for a full 5 hours untill i left. All i could do was slink back into a dark booth with C and this other guy and laugh about how lame and strange it all was. We bonded over it. These girls terrify me. Anyone within reach was sucked into their marriage vortex. I got to hear all about their cakes. "Omigod, don't you just LOVE this hemline? Who's doing your cake??? Don't you just love these gloves for the bridesmaids?? MEEE TOOOO!!!!" in the middle of a bar. fucking creepy bitches. |
I used to hate it. I had an ex that flipped out on me for not staying home from a youth group ski-trip he knew I was attending since the previous November. Even though our birthdays and anniversary were in February, he called me up the night before I left for my trip and screamed at me because I hadn't changed my mind. When I got back he told me how awful his weekend was because he had to sit around with all his single friends and listen to them whine. Now it just seems silly...I much prefer the random gifts given for no particular reason. If there is anyone who has no business expecting anything, it's yours truly. |
that'll learn 'em. |
It's just the thought. By no means buy anything expensive. You'll either freak her out ("Where does he think this relationship is at already?") or make her feel bad that she only got you somthing small. And you'll up the stakes for the next holiday/birthday/anniversary. |
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I have no business expecting anything because of all the random stuff I get, not because I never get anything. There you go. |
that's the kind of shit that if i DID say anything, which i never would, or if they noticed that i was avoiding them like the plauge, they'd probably assume i was just jealous. That's how girls like that are. Also, their weddings are 2 years away. 2 years! Better start planning without pause now, girly! Because the 3 or 4 hours that you're going to be wearing that dress will no doubt be the single most important of your entire life. And i NEED to be a part of it! I already went to one of the showers. I went for the food. It was an engagement party. I didn't even know people had those. How much money do they have to spend before they're content that they really truly do love each other? and convince everyone else of it? we'll see... it's a fun ride for me, anyway. With shrimp at every turn ;) |
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Funny thing was once this guy saw that she was that kind of girl he dropped her. When she didn't go away he told her that he decided that he was gay, just to get her off of his back, and made sure he brought other women to the house when he knew she was going to be there. It was funny from the outside looking in. Since then she got pregnant while in college and married the man in a quick ceremony in the courthouse and they have a daughter and she is teaching elementary school, so it is Tawfik, Denise and little Sabrina. I sent her some clothes for Sabrina, but I haven't seen her or heard from her since my grandmother died. She is just never around when I try to call. Too busy thinking we are all jealous I guess :) |
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ha! that rocks! yesterday i heard it referred to as "Singles Awareness Day" which i thought was pretty accurate. when i saw kevin yesterday he reminded me that we actually had a nice valentines day last year. i think i cooked dinner at my apartment, we drank wine, and fucked. but it wasn't unlike any other random night, except he brought me a shitload of chocolate from Dr. Chocolate (but then again, he always was good about supporting my chocolate habit - not just on that wretched holiday) and i baked my famous fudge cake. |
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happy valentines day, suckas. http://www.bathroom-mania.com/urinoir/kisses.html |
http://images.icnetwork.co.uk/upl/mirror/feb2003/1/8/00010A29-9D0C-1E4C-9CC180BFB6FA0000.jpg |
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so, a colleague dressed up as Dr. Love (heart shaped shades, red and white checkered pants, pink shirt, heart pins, etc etc etc) just dropped my office with a huge basket of dark and white chocolate covered strawberries. my boss made me go with him out to the lobby for a photo opportunity. i only pretended to eat it. i actually threw it away later. not in protest or anything (i did wear red today, afterall), but just because i'm gaining weight again. i got cocky about my weight for a while, and therefore have been way overindulging - eating and drinking way too much. two weeks ago i was loose inside of my red velvet pants. now i can barely sqeeze into my fat jeans. ugh. i know it probably doesn't look like it from the photo but the scale doesn't lie! from 144 to 158! in two weeks! |
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oh i know. but you have to understand small town texas school district mentality. people here do all sorts of gooby stuff like that all the time. that guy used to be an elementary school principal. on the other hand, he and his wife both ride big, fat Harley Davidsons. he's actually a really cool guy. |
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that's what i'm saying! people here are not so serious about themselves. they enjoy being goofy to the extreme and don't care if they look silly or like "tools". besides, the pants are actually red and white checked. heh. |
need this toilet! |
