gOOD CHEESE

I didn't know there was a King of Cheese. I am aware of a certain Mayor McCheese, but not a monarch. Fascinating.

Cheese is evil. Avoid at all costs.

I wouldn't share that view with a whole lot of folks if you're moving to Wisconsin. I would venture to guess that much of the public infrastructure you will use while you are there has been financed, directly or indirectly, by cheese. Just don't buy the foam hat. It's not a residency requirement despite what you might hear to the contrary.

i love cheese. i especially love extra sharp wisconsin cheddar. gouda is yummy, too. i could go on and on, but i will refrain.

About the time people find out i can't stand cheese is when they figure out i'm a weirdo. The cool people deal with it. And I won't be in cheese land, but rather Army-land. Which will probably be just as annoying. as to why I don't like cheese, well, I think it has to do with mouth-feel as much as taste. About the only cheese I find edible is parmesan, which is more like a spice than a cheese. I tell folks it's my personal geis to not eat cheese, if i eat it, something bad happens.

I am the King of Cheese. I grow it between my toes. I like kasseri on saltines with a porter or a brown ale. Cut off my extremities, gouge out my eyes, burst my eardrums, cover me with chickenfat and drop me on a hornet's nest, ridicule me, confuse me, betray me, pity me. Just don't take away my cheese. And goddammit, don't touch my beer either.

Euuuwwwww -- Dave! I KNOW Agatha is not having that shit in her house! (Good lord/he's so peverse...) I am absolutely wild about Boursin. It's the only cheese that goes w/lobster. And Brie. The semi-soft spreadables cheeses are the best. But only as a treat/since I can't indulge in them w/out some crusty French bread. Which I usually eschew/becuz of what the carbos do to me. I love Parmesean too. But I haven't had any really great Parmaggiano-Reggiano since I left NY. Damn -- now I'm hungry!

fresh mozzarella insalata di caprice drool

Oooohhh, yeah baby! But I haven't had any fresh made-on-the-premesis Mozarella since NY either.

I like a good grilled-cheese. Damn Frank.

Oh my god, this reminded me of my celebrity brush I forgot to post. So, a coupla years ago my girl Kate's getting married and I'm a bridesmaid, 'cept she's not and she calls us all maybe a month and a half out and says I ain't marrying him let's just have a party instead, and since I already had my plane tickets we did just that. But first, I flew into Baltimore to hang out with Alan and Kam. So we go to look at the Fresh Fields in Mt. Washington that's putting all the homegrown health food industry out of business, and I think Kam needed some lemongrass to make me Thai food or some shit, and there's this totally hot guy hanging out in the personal products aisle, and then checking out the the free range organic dead animals flesh. So I'm circling him like a shark, checking out his butt, looking at his t-shirt (it was black, but I don't remember what else might have been interesting about it anymore), and I do my predation thing for about 15 minutes, wandering to the frozen entrees and wandering back, wandering through bulks grains and wandering back, when it hits me: it's fucking Kyle Secor. I have been cruising Kyle Secor. I go running back to Alan and Kam, we make a quick plan to kidnap him and secret him in the trunk of Alan's crappy car, and we giggle a lot (Alan and Kam are both pretty damned straight, this is how star struck we all were with Kyle Secor), and then we jettison the plan and hightail it out of there. Kyle Secor is, in person, incredibly yummy. I only wish it hand been Andre Braugher. But him I would have recognized instantaneously.

sometimes i wonder how you all can survive without san francisco bay area sourdough. for your cheeses. except semillama, who wouldn't have cheeses with it.

i don't like sourdough. gimme a good rye or crusty italian any day. who is kyle secor? another one of the delicious cheese categories are those mini bonbel cheeses that come wrapped in red wax, or in cube form in foil like a boullion cube. yum.

I like cultural cheese - like troma films. or the Godzilla movie. Comedy of the year. Yum.

Kyle Secor. Yum. Stupid name. My hound is named Bayless.

I believe spells is BAYLISS. But soon he won't be spelling it atall *sigh*. So Margaret -- you didn't ask for his autograph? You scoped out A "Homicide" cast member & walked off w/no signature? Girl -- you're slippin'!

I was, get this, too humiliated by the fact that I hadn't known who I was scoping. If I'd known it, I coulda been happy with it. If I'd never figured it out, I woulda been blissful with it. But, y'know, I lived in Baltimore. I narrowly avoiuded being in a scene of that show at Penn station. I drank coffee where they all drink coffee. The Kyle Secor, thing, though...what's that minutemen line? Oh yeah: I must look like a dork. 3 words to say about cheese, baby: Gor. Gon. Zola. It is the stankest. Crumble a little bit of that over your field greens, add some rosemary and just a hint...a tiny hint...of basil and dill and thyme each (more than a hint and yer doing an herbal wrong to yer flavours) put in some sliced pears (oh), some of the green but none of the whites of scallions (oh) walnuts and/or sliced grilled chicken in nibble portions, drizzle with raspberry vinaigrette with SEEDS LEFT IN FOR YOUR DAMNED CROP...and have a slice of crusty any kind of unseasoned loaf (I like sourdough, but a big yank off a loaffa french or italian is good to) and oh man...oh...I can't go on.

Oooh Kyle! We love him! As long as he isn't sporting that skinhead look. ugh. Wear a hat, man! I always thought Timmy looked really cute with Chris Rawls. Mmmm...manwich!

I had a salad like that at a restaurant here (minus the thyme/I think). Cost me fifteen fucking dollars! It was great. And huge (I took half of it home). But damn... $15 bucks for a salad w/out seafood is a bit much.

Well. That is steep, since this is what I generally make (and it like NEVER gets eaten) for office potlucks. I dress the greens with the herbs and vinaigrette first, then I slice up my pears and make a pretty little pinwheel on top with them, then I grumble Gorgonzola and spinkle scallions greens and walnuts across the surface. And they all eat fucking Pizza hut that some manager guy brought in because he couldn't browbeat his wife into making something. Hah on him. But looks like it's hah on me, too. Except me and the sekkitaries mow on it for a couple of days. I don't do it with the chicken, though, because I'm lazy.

There's a chemistry thing with cheese. As a child I couldn't stand anything but pasteurized processed American cheese. Cheddar smelled like paint to me. Then one day I could eat cheddar. Then I loved it. My body chemistry had changed. So there's hope for Semillama. I'm still not wild about the moldier varieties but my cheese horizon has expanded a lot. The best cheese I ever ate: My family subscribed to cheese-of-the-month club for awhile. One month it was yogurt cheese. This was back when people didn't know what yogurt was. Ewww - yogurt! Sounded disgusting. So we almost didn't even open the package. But we tried it. I've never been able to find a cheese like that again, but that cheese was like heaven. A little burst of heaven in your mouth.

How I pity you poor people having to eat horrible american cheese made from feedlot cattle that produce milk so insipid that butter and cheese turns out white! Real cheese is so delicious, regardless of the variety, when the cows get to eat GRASS, not grain (or each other - but thats in britain mostly). My favourite is made in Marlborough, by a company called Koromiko. Their Monterey is fabulous, and they do a mean vegetarian Cheddar too (made with vegetable rennet). But here even cheap ordinary cheese tastes great. Currently I have a block of edam in the fridge, which I find a good all-purpose cheese, plus a local camembert which is also very fine.

Uh. I buy my cheese at the Health Food store. Organic. Mostly imported. I like this sage derby a lot, but it's no Gorgonzola.

Mmmmmmmmmmmmm.....cheeeeeese

king edam III rocked!!!!

Colby

really good organic extra sharp cheddar from vermont, with apple pie. mmmmm.

I love brie,a whole lot.

The King of Cheese lives here: http://www.marscheese.com/

Goats cheese with the charcoal on the outside. In a salad, drizzled with balsamic vinegar. I'm in spasms.

I think that is what they serve in Mexico on refried beans,it's not that yellow cheddar cheese they serve on this side of the border.I like it,love it,yes I do.

I am abt to go grab the last bit of smoked Gouda from the fridge right now! Ummmm!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!! Is that a raccoon?

hm, this tissue smells like brie too.

r.c., you need a cracker to go with that?

Is it brie or camembert that has that mushroom (fungus) smell to its skin or both? I like any cheese except goat cheese. I especially like blue cheeses, but not when they're too too salty. Smoked gouda is gooda. Stilton, cheddar, havarti, what have you, it's all good. On Carr's water biscuits.

i love those crackers

Yeah, they're the perfect canvas for the cheese, or anything else, such as hummus, or that Boursin spread, or foie gras. What's that Italian Olive spread that's kind of spicy, with chunks of olives and tomatoes -- muffalata or something that? That's good too. Damn, I ready for lunch now.

tapenade? i think muffelata is a sandwich made with such. the bistro where i live serves something they call muffelata which is salami and olive tapenade on that chewy itallian bread that begins with an "f". anyone?

focaccia?

no. really chewy. dense. loaf.

They sell muffelata in a jar at Trader Joes so I think it is the filling not the sandwich itself.

Yeah, exactly Dinner Lady. That's where I got the stuff from -- really good.

they got trader joes on the east coast now?

All the recipies I find on the net are for sandwiches. maybe trader joes is just offering a muffelata kit-in-a-jar. i know that the "olive salad" is called tapenade. they sell it as such all over the place. Muffelata 3 cloves garlic, crushed 1 cup pimiento-stuffed green olives 1 cup black olive, chopped 1/2 cup roasted red peppers, Italian 1 cup olive oil 3 tablespoons fresh parsley 2 tablespoons white wine vinegar 1 loaf Italian bread, round 1/3 pound Genoa salami, thinly sliced 1/2 pound provolone cheese, thinly sliced 1/2 pound Havarti, or other mild white cheese 1/3 pound prosciutto, sliced The day before serving, combine garlic, olives, peppers, olive oil, parsley, and vinegar. Cut bread in half horizontally. Scoop out some of the center and drizzle with some of the olive oil from the olive salad; use plenty. Layer salami, olive salad, provolone, cheese, and prosciutto. Top with remaining bread and slice into wedges.

Yeah there's one in Long Beach and one in Hewlett -- more in Jersey & Connecticut, I figured Trader Joe's was an east coast thing. I like the place, but usually end up buying a lot of extra weird shit I don't need and never use.

Nate, that sandwich sounds SO GOOD. They have 2 Trader Joes in Boston and they rock out. I love the Pirate Booty and other dorky good for you snacks. They do totally sneak that lots of their stuff isn't as 'good for you' as they make out. When you check out the 'serving size' sometimes it's super small. Like those (yummy) calzones are like 750 calories (half a day of food) because there are 2 servings in a box (which contains one 8" calzone). They're certainly not the only ones guilty of such madness tho.

Dinner Lady, how'd you get your posting name? I wanted to ask that a while ago, but you haven't been around much lately. Just curious.

the first time she posted she was talking about making dinner for some guy. dude, pay attention.

On that basis, my name should be Buttfucking.

on that basis alone?

On that basis, my name should be Satan's Severed Head.

there really is no basis. i just recall her first post.

That would make me the protagonist murderess.

that would make me Dave.

Ya'll should just up the shut fuck!

And that would make me the Dwarf?

Paying attention makes my brain hurt.

Yes, Nate is right, I was having some deeply pathetic dilema about making dinner for a date which I would like to apologise for now. But I still like the name anyway because I do love dinner parties dammit.

who doesn't?

Go find your severed head,and behave yourself.

that would make me the king of cheese. there's some white stuff with hot peppers in it from Jay's international foods which reminds me of provel and nearly moldy mozerralla in a white cream sauce. My mym ymmyyy! goat's cheese in charcoal, I do declare! or that would make me Cz's parrothead, and I will not behave myself.

"The Dinner Lady" as a moniker evokes an aura of British elegance. It makes me wish I was a Dinner Lady, too. I once found a severed goat's head in the park. I took it back with me, but couldn't figure out what I wanted to do with it.

"The Dinner Lady" as a moniker evokes an aura of British elegance. It makes me wish I was a Dinner Lady, too. I once found a severed goat's head in the park. I took it back with me, but couldn't figure out what I wanted to do with it.

Anything worth saying is worth saying twice?

Anybody got a good recipe for jalapeno poppers, with some kind of real cheese, instead of that gluey "American cheese" they use in those frozen things? What the hell is "processed cheese food" anyways? One thing I tried once was stuffing jalapenos with ground pork sausage -- fry up the sausage, then stuff into the jalapenos and bake for a while, until the jalapenos wilt a bit. Very good.

Dumpster Boy, it would be confusing if you were a Dinner Lady here on this board, but I hope you will be a Dinner Lady in your heart. You could cook the goat's head. I knew this Greek guy and they would eat sheep head but if you found it in the park you don't know how fresh it is. Speaking of which, what makes meat Halal? What makes it Kosher? Just a blessing or more? In England last month I had an awesome goat cheese with ash on the outside. It was amazing.

kosher: a sharp knife. the idea is to kill the beast by letting it's blood run out, but without it releasing all those fear hormones. so the rabbi-butcher walks up to the cow, scratches it behind the ear, and slices it's juglar with a razor sharp knife. a bunch of blood pours out and the cow collapses. probably a steer, not a cow. a rabbi charges a fee to do any kasrut work. the aryan nation calls this the "jew tax", since it is wrapped into the cost of the product. that's kind of rediculous, though. by the same note, flashy marketing campaigns would be an "idiot tax", the cost of which more than offsets the "jew tax", and is, in general, directed at dumbasses like in the aryan nation.

Isn't salt involved too, and washing the meat? And some blessings, don't they say a couple of jewish hail mary's over it or something? Ughh, I always thought that having my throat slit would be one of the worst ways to go, just watching helplessly as your life ebbs out of you. Makes me queasy to think about it. I've got a big scar across the top of my throat where they removed lymph nodes when I was a kid. I hate looking at it.

I do think kosher meats taste better. Hebrew National are fab. Those Rabbis must know something. There is a Kosher Chinese place in Boston called (and I shit you not) "Shalom Hunan" There was also a kosher pizzaria but I don't know how they made it kosher. It's closed down now.

it also needs to be cooked in a kosher kitchen to remain kosher. i just finished reading a book about a woman who converted her kitchen to kosher. it's a ton of work.

two sets of everything. you can't eat meat on a dairy plate. you can't make a kosher pork roll egg & cheese.

oy vey

nate's story sounds almost cute. but in the kosher butcher during a show on mad cow disease that calm ol' cow was hanging by it's hooves.

alive? my story comes from the class i took on judism. we watched a film of a rabbit killing a steer.

I remember waiting for a bus in the middle of the night in some little town in southern mexico, and I watched a couple of guys butcher a cow. they had it hanging by its hind hooves, and they slit its belly side open, and the blood flowed in a stream through the dust.

I just figured out nate meant "rabbi," not "rabbit."

whoops.

there was a matzo crisis here in honolulu last weekend. seriously. it was even on the news and in the paper. all the stores ran out. my friend kim called me from her cell phone at various grocery stores, where she was shoving aside little old jewish ladies to get to the gifilte fish and had to settle for over dated boxes of egg and onion and whole wheat matzo. i am not making this up. (i am, however, trying to avoid the shower by surfing the sorabji boards)

dougie's right about the washing and salting. you have to remove all the blood - blood is nicht kosher. y'all could probably go on a word search for "kashrut" and find out all the specifics of kosher killing.

it was alive. the heart has to pump the blood out or something.

maybe that's the next step?

I love the matzoh crisis story. But no one seems to know what makes meat Halal yet do they?

FOr Christmas, I'm getting my dad cheese. (Cheese is the only gift he likes....he's an unusual man.) The thing is, what kind of cheese to get? I usually get him strange cheeses I don't think he's had before, because he'd rather try new cheeses than get a bunch of the old favorites (viz., Manchego, Edam, and Parrano). The Fresh Fields down the street has heaps of different blue cheeses -- my dad loves blue cheese, but I don't, so I don't know which kinds are the good ones. Any suggestions? Any other kinds of uncommon cheeses to try? He likes stuff that you could eat on its own (not cheese you'd grate or cook with), if that helps.

I love cheese balls and logs... oh god, shouldn't have said that

I have a big food encyclopedia that lists all kinds of things in the cheese section. It also talks about consistency, flavor, how it should be eaten and so forth. When I get home I will check it for you.

This one is a good creamy cheese: http://www.cheese.com/Description.asp?Name=Reblochon And this one is firmer and really tasty: http://www.cheese.com/Description.asp?Name=Tomme%20de%20Savoie

Cheese Alarm Robyn Hitchcock Roquefort and gruyère and slippery brie All of these cheeses, they happen to me oh please ... Rough pecorino and moody ram hall Stop me before I just swallow it all oh please ... Somebody ring the Cheese Alarm oh please ... Somebody ring the Cheese Alarm Goats' Cheese cylinder, tangy and white Roll over me in the flickering night oh please ... Chaume and jarlsberg, applewood smoked "The pleasure is mine", he obligingly joked oh please ... Somebody ring the Cheese Alarm oh please ... Somebody ring the Cheese Alarm Hey now Fletcher, don't keep me up late I cant even fit into size 38's oh please ... Juddering Stilton with your blue-blooded veins You can't build a palace without any drains oh please ... oh please ... oh please ... Half the world starving and half the world gloats Half the world sits on the other and gloats oh please ... Truckle of Cheddar in a muslin rind Would you give it all up for some piece of mind? oh no!

I had this sandwich yesterday that was better than anything I could possibly describe. It was my birthday on thursday, and I went up to Seattle to have a birthday. I left Cleo at her best friend Austin's house, and went out to some bar where drinks kept appearing in front of my face. I got pretty loaded, and told the waitress that she was cute. I was supposed to have breakfast with my sister the next morning, but I woke up far too late. Anyhow, I really wanted a greasy egg breakfast due to the hangover, but my friend convinced me that we needed to go get these sandwiches at this rather generic looking internet cafe on Broadway. I was doubtful, but her zeal about these food items convinced me that maybe she had a reason for feeling this strongly about a sandwich, so we went. I had this gorgonzola cheese, mixed greens, pears, and walnuts with a little drizzle of some delicious dressing, on a crusty square roll that was grilled in something delicious. It was like manna from heaven. We brought our friend Vaughn, Austin's father, some kind of salami sandwich to thank him for watching Cleo, and he was making so many noises while eating this sandwich that it was almost like a sitcom scene. Then, I went downtown and found my sister, and we did a little shopping and went on the holiday merry go round. Then Cleo and I went back to Tacoma, where we missed the last connecting bus to Olympia due to foggy weather, and Dave had to come and get us. I also got some awesome new slippers from Dave, a mug from my favorite Connecticut breakfast place, and a nice frame with a picture of Napoleon in it with a talk bubble that said "I love Kelsey". Also some money, and some homies wrapped in tissue paper from Cleo. Also, many many alcoholic beverages. So, like I said before, I love cheese.

Happy Belated Birthday Agatha!

That's ditto from me girlfiend:)

i got some smoked fontina. first time ever. it is so good.

Cheese is good, but whenever I have an opportunty to eat some I get sick.

We got some smoked gouda at BJ's that was pretty kickass. Also tried a goat cheese brie last week that was really good too -- had a little more bite than your usual brie.

Gjetost is the shit.

i gathered that by it's appearance.

happy belated birthday agatha. sounds like you had a totally bitchin birthday, wish i could have been around for the festivities :)

yayyy Homies!

Spider, I'm sorry I forgot to look that stuff up for you...it's that time of the semester.

That's okay, Kazoo -- http://www.cheese.com should have plenty of info.

PS. Happy birthday, Agatha! I was so bent on my quest for cheese that I didn't think to say anything earlier.

thanks, everbuddy! i'm really old now. cyst, you should go to this sandwich place. it's on broadway, in that strange little area where supercuts or hairmasters or something like that is, kind of across the street from the walgreen's or whatever that drugstore is on the corner of broadway and john, i think?

I had a dream about cheese last night. I dreamt I ran through a cheese shop while eating a grilled chicken sandwich, and the owner yelled at me for contaminating his cheese with the odor of grilled chicken. The shop was huge and had tunnels underground lined with cheese. The owner chased me through the tunnels as I ate and ran.

cyst? i thought Lapis was Pez. crap.

c = cyst. Lapis = pez i eat sharp chedder, sometimes extra sharp white canadian cheddar cheese with pretzles for a snack. often. usually in the same bite.

Happy belated birthday, Agatha! Which breakfast place in CT would that be? O'Rourke's by chance? I had a yummy goat cheddar yesterday, and there's a goat gouda in the fridge. I'm a big fan of anything goat these days; lactose is not quite my friend any longer.

the yankee doodle! it's a little tiny hole in the wall in new haven, with the best egg and cheese on a hard roll sandwiches ever.

i got this crazy sharp cheddar awhile back. it had salt on the outside. not a lot, though. just a grain here and there to crunch between your teeth.

ooh thanks for the clarification patrick...i was wondering why pez hadn't posted for a while, starting to worry a bit that she had disappeared... i love cheese. all kinds. YUM!!!

I like cheese.

Agatha, I think I've eaten there--classic little diner, near a Charette store?

What's Charette?

just say NO to milk.

well, ok. a while back i had one of the best restaurant steaks of my life. it was a medium rare ny strip dripping on top with a gorgonzola butter sauce. fuck all mighty that was good.

sarah did you happen to catch the daily show's segment last night on the milk conspiracy? its genocide you know.

no, i don't have a TV. but yes, of course it's genocide. like, duh. milk is the reason that little girls mature too early and political leaders have become increasingly aggressive neofacist warmongers. it's also the cause of cancer, depression, obesity, hangnails, and the common cold. unless you are a baby (human or other mammal) sucking on a tit, milk is just WRONG.

woo-hoo Sarah! Finally, someone who shares my sentiments toward milk who is also not a militant vegan* *and yes, I know that not all vegans are militant (kazoo loves you Platylady) but I find few who can resolve my aversion to milk with my addiction to sushi

Agatha, Charette is a chain of art supply stores, founded by a high school classmate of my dad's. I only remember driving around New Haven once, seeing a diner and charette in close proximity, and I believe I ate at that diner. I think I went into the Charette as well, but my memory is pretty fuzzy.

you're thinking of the copper kitchen. i love that place.

Move aside plebiens I am the godess of the cheese packing corp.But there is only one question to ponder. Did you eat all this acid?

Cheese is great, yes it is. Even if it smells like a foot and has green mold growing everywhere. Love the cheese still. just please don't eat it, just hang it on your wall.