Stupid things I didn't say...

sorabji.com: Are you stupid?: Stupid things I didn't say...
THIS IS A READ-ONLY ARCHIVE FROM THE SORABJI.COM MESSAGE BOARDS (1995-2016).
By Warner on Thursday, May 4, 2000 - 01:45 pm:

    I have a book of stupid headlines and stuff...
    Found this one, (Headline from the New York Times, I don't know the date):

    NEW YORKERS ARE BUSY, BUT NOT TOO BUSY TO IGNORE THE PROBLEMS OF SOCIAL NEEDS OF FOREIGN GUESTS.

By Warner on Thursday, May 4, 2000 - 01:52 pm:

    I have another one... it's not so much stupid as it is confusing..
    The Setup: (CBC Radio broadcast of the King and Queen of England's visit to my city [Winnipeg], way back in 1939. The Prime Minister at the time was of coures Mackenzie King, and the Mayor was Mr. Queen....)

    Here comes the Royal Family now. The automobile has now stopped.... Oh, theres the King--he's stepping out, followed by her Majesty Queen Elizabeth, nattily attired in a silver coat. Mr. King is now shanking hands with the King, and introducing Mr. Queen to the King and Queen, and the Mrs. Queen to the Queen and King. The are now proceeding up the steps to the well decorated City Hall, the King and Mr. King together with the Queen being escorted by Mrs. Queen. The King has now stopped and said something to Mrs. Queen and goes to Mrs. Queen and the Queen and Mr. King and the Queen laughed jovially. The King leaves Mr. King and goes to Mrs Queen and the Queen and Mr. King follow behind......

    It just goes on and on and on.

By semillama on Thursday, May 4, 2000 - 09:10 pm:

    But Queen Elizabeth's husband isn't a king, he's a prince.

    here's some real headlines:

    Woman Flushes Toliet, Then Catches Fire - Rocky Mountain News, 5/20/98

    Deadly Centipede Chases Postmen - Daily Telegraph, 11/1/90

    Chaos as a Dead Rat Makes a Break For It - Manchester Eve. News, 7/9/98

    Man Fights Ravenous Moth with Sex - Victoria Times-Colonist, 7/14/98

By moonit on Thursday, May 4, 2000 - 09:55 pm:

    Deadly Centipede Chases Postman?

    I'd pay good money to see that.

By on Friday, May 5, 2000 - 10:09 am:

    Deadly Woman Fights Ravenous Man with Sex as Centipede Flushes Toilet with Rat who tried to Make a Break For It with his mouth fully encrusted on Queen Elizabeth's leg, as Prince Philip follows along down the Toilet while the Postmen looks on-Can you say End of the Monarchy? moonit-we should no longer pay for this kind of news. Theatre should be for free!

By on Friday, May 5, 2000 - 10:13 am:

    i second that - moth

By Warner on Friday, May 5, 2000 - 10:33 am:

    semillama, The post on the royal families vist took place in 1939... I don't think the current queen elizabeth was more than a small child at the time. The story was refering to Queen Elizabeth I and her husband King George VI, not Elizabeth II and Prince Philip.

    Slogan found on a pair of Japanese overalls:

    DRUG STORE BODY. Let's get the Good Shape and have a sexy body just like a pig.

By Warner on Friday, May 5, 2000 - 10:36 am:

    Ok, Elizabeth I was a teenager in 1939, what ever.

By Warner on Friday, May 5, 2000 - 12:38 pm:

    Pentagon Definition:
    PEACE: Permanent Pre-Hostility

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