AS in, We Should Talk. That Talk. I know it's coming, and I have this sick feeling in the pit of my stomach that I know what the outcome will be. I tried not to fall for her, really I did. I tried HARD. to no avail, aparrently. But I know the Talk is coming, and that has always not been a good thing for me. If ever I needed psychic backup, now is the time.

Well, it's not that bad. It still ain't a good feeling though. I don't want to go back to feeling like a schmuck all the time, though.

you know the talk is coming because, in your experience, enough time has passed that the talk is just around the corner...? or because you see indications that it's falling apart? you start down this road you'll drive it to conclusion.

Miss E. is going home for the summer.

Plus, she said "we need to talk." That's pretty obvious. Miss E. is not coming back to Columbus, either, and may have an "issue" with LDRs, which my secret super power of persuasion and desirability, which I hope to have emerge fully developed by, oh, four o'clock today, will assuage. we'll see. hopefully I will be very pleasantly surprised.

LDRs? Lesbian Daughters of Retards? Oh wait, Long Distance Relationships. I see. Good luck, sem!

what the fuck are you people talking about. what Talk? the breakup Talk? The "We Should Think About Our Future" talk? The birth control talk? What? Who is Miss E. ?

keep your dignity. when time comes to talk, tell her you don't think LDRs are great options and that you think the best idea would be to break it off. then: a) she starts bawling- hold on to her until she calms down and then suggest if, after six months of happy, progressive LDR, you'd look for a job near where she is. b) she is neutral and accepting- suggest that you keep in touch and maybe your paths will rejoin in the future. c) she seems relieved- it was never meant to be. (advice is easy to give when you're not involved. whatever happens, good luck.)

Patrick, you are endearingly clueless sometimes.

he called you a cute moron.

sem. tell me, in your very first post of this thread where is there ANY clue as to what the fuck you are talking about? where? The Talk? You speak of it as if everyone has gone through it. Like its the conversation about the birds in the bees. No matter. I get it now. Are you warmer nate?

everyone else got it. and since when does anybody ever give a background when starting a thread?

"everyone else got it." so thats the measurin stick? actually. I have to confess. I knew what you were talking about.....for some reason I felt it necessary that because not everyone has had this "Talk" I wanted to take issue with the presentation of it...as if everyone had. Im sorry. Im finding out I subconsciously play dumb more than I like to admit, for unknown reasons. Possibly attention. nonetheless. Carry on. When will the TALK proceed? Transcripts please?

"and since when does anybody ever give a background when starting a thread?" Well, I try to. That said, I like Nate's plan.

well, i'll iceskate in hell.

oh jeezis. that girl better know what's good for her. i really don't want to have to come up there just to kick some Little Miss E ass.

No harm no foul patrick. (I confess to grinning whenever I read your posts, because now i have a clear mental image of you in one of nico's sweaters, hunched over a keyboard with a sort of goofy yet intent expression on your face) I have many reasons as to why a LDR is viable, especially if I'm one of the people. I think she recently got burned on a LDR but the situation from how I understand it is completely different. Don't worry, folks, I am an adult (most of the time) and I'll handle whatever happens with grace and dignity. At least in public.

I had a really LDR with my first wife -- NY to Paris. It worked out, although I almost bankrupted myself with phone bills & plane tix. Ah, young love, I remember it well. Wait, I guess I still have young love -- my fiancee's 27. Probably why I remember it well.

Dougie, is this the same woman you told us you have little in common with because of the age difference? (Didn't you or someone else describe it as being really good at watching TV together?) Or is this another young woman? You salty dog, you.

Yes Spider, same woman. I was trying to find excuses for not getting married and not committing, as opposed to trying to make it work. Long story short, we're fine with our differences, we love each other very much, and it was time to move it to the next level.

LDRs. Bah. I thought I might have something helpful to say, but alas. I do not. Aye me. LS

Move it to the next level. Dammit that nearly made me cry.

Yeah, I can be pretty romantic when I want to.

Seriously, Sem, you should make the first move. Aren't you tired of being the one who has to react to the situation, rather than the one who sets it in motion? Be neutral and let her reaction inform your next move.

OK, I am such a dork. I really am. You romantics out there will really like this one: (the dialogue before we fell asleep last night) E: "Andy?" me: "Yes?" E: "I love you." Me: "I love you, too." E: "That's all we really needed to talk about." And that's why I just can't work today. Fun fact: that's the first time in the history of the world that I've had that particular conversation.

WHOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! ROCK ON!!! this totally made my day.

Yay!!

whoa. you guys are moving right along. you big lug.

i guess we won't be kicking any asses. that's good.

Don't sound so disappointed. We're about due for another annoying fool to start carpet bombing the boards with inaneties. I can't remember the last time I felt this good without chemical enhancement.

well, not to be a cynic, but love is a chemical enhancement.

Congrats Sem. Sounds like things are really looking good for the two of you. I hope you are happy for a long time to come!

You're so cute.

Hmm, that's not how I pictured it, mine was more like: E: "Sem?" Sem: "Yes?" E: "I love you." Sem: "I love you, too." E: "That's all we really needed to talk about." Sem: "Ok sweetie. Mind if I watch a little WWF?" But I was close! Congrats, dude.

You should take her to see Spider-Man. Great date movie.

awww. that made my day.

I did take her to see Spider-man. We were both pumped up to see it. When we got there, the next 4 shows were sold out, but hten a guy standing in front of us turned around and GAVE US TWO FREE TICKETS. prabob! She's making Pad Thai for us tonight and we're going to watch Margaret Cho.

yay! Slack comes to those who slack! LS

Sem, dont' give up on her so easily. Just keep in touch w/her & see what things feel like once you're both apart. Im not saying you're honor-bound to get into an LDR. But you've waited sooooo long to meet someone you really dig. Don't let the naysayers keep you from trying...