Bored. Help me.


sorabji.com: Surfwatch: Bored. Help me.
THIS IS A READ-ONLY ARCHIVE FROM THE SORABJI.COM MESSAGE BOARDS (1995-2016).

By
Margret on Thursday, August 26, 1999 - 11:21 am:

    Can't surf too much from work, yah know?
    I am looking to read short fiction by people who don't suck.


By Waffles on Thursday, August 26, 1999 - 11:59 am:


By Rhiannon on Thursday, August 26, 1999 - 12:02 pm:

    How about short non-fiction?

    Haven't you always wondered about the pros and cons of being a eunuch, or whether the old story about Catherine the Great and the horse was true, or why men have nipples?

    Then go to the link I posted under *ahem* "Boredom Antidote!"!

    It took me about 2.5 hours to read every question on that list. And there are three lists, plus loose miscellaneous columns = over a day's worth of time-killing.


By J on Thursday, August 26, 1999 - 12:15 pm:

    I also like that nerve.com on Waffles page.


By Waffles on Thursday, August 26, 1999 - 12:24 pm:

    yes they have really talented writers writing for them, including Jerry Stahl....also the Lisa Diaries are really good.. there is tons of shit there to read


By Jinafishes on Thursday, August 26, 1999 - 12:52 pm:


By Margret on Thursday, August 26, 1999 - 01:32 pm:

    Don't need to or want to read more existentialism. I can type "Nietzsche" correctly, drunk off my ass and blindfolded with no sensation in my fingers. I have read and written that much. Seriously. Ditto Sartre, Foucault, Heidegger, Hegel (though that takes me about an hour to get through a paragraph of, I am not a masochist, just filled with the ennui). Wittgenstein, um, Wittig, Deleuze & Guattari, errr, oh yeah that Wanker Derrida, ummm, Irigaray, etc. And, uhh, have no desire to interact with anyone about it, btw.
    Have read Godot. And quite a bit of Baudelaire and Rimbaud and Genet, lest one of you decide to expand THOSE horizons.
    And Spider Monkey, my friend, I checked yer stuff before sniveling. I am not lazy, just bored.
    Sigh. I was thinking more stuff like Craig of my boot's story. I have to pee again. Must stop drinking coffee.


By Waffles on Thursday, August 26, 1999 - 01:36 pm:

    she's well read, so what good are we


By Jinafishes on Thursday, August 26, 1999 - 01:37 pm:

    Well I tried looking up short stories, I just didn't see any, most is like fanfiction or some crap, you could look for Shirley Jackson, look for J D Salinger, he did a few, and well, I like Bradbury, no idea what kind of fiction you want, there's all kinds. If you can find Sandra Cisneros and haven't read her yet, go for it. Or look up the Illuminatus and read excerpts from that.


By J on Thursday, August 26, 1999 - 01:57 pm:

    Anybody hear anything about J.D.Salinger coming out with a new book after all these years?I thought I heard that somewhere.


By Swine on Thursday, August 26, 1999 - 02:08 pm:

    spackle your piehole with dirty snow.


By J on Thursday, August 26, 1999 - 02:41 pm:

    Swine has come to now,assuming a piehole is what I think it is,if someone wants to spackle my piehole,if they eat some yellow snow,I,ll let them.


By Waffles on Thursday, August 26, 1999 - 02:43 pm:

    im yer man..I think :-\


By Markus on Thursday, August 26, 1999 - 03:25 pm:

    I'm just afraid.


By Agatha on Thursday, August 26, 1999 - 09:19 pm:

    http://www.afterdinner.com



    and of course, my website, soon to be revived, featuring stories by droopy, swine, and our good friend nate. i know i keep saying it will be revived, but it really will soon.


By Margret on Thursday, August 26, 1999 - 09:38 pm:

    Sorry, A., been there and read that.

    Next.


By Rhiannon on Friday, August 27, 1999 - 12:04 am:

    Have you been here?

    http://www.rotten.com

    (Scary stuff there...this is only if you need the equivalent of a kick in the head to get you going in the morning)

    http://www.montyclift.ic24.net/index.htm

    (Yes, it's non-fiction, and about one of *my* favorite actors, but if you want to read a tortured-artist-misunderstood-loner life story, here's the place!)


By Swine on Friday, August 27, 1999 - 12:11 am:


By H on Friday, August 27, 1999 - 07:52 am:

    Margret: Craig (of My Boot) has a couple of fairly recent essays posted on his web page which you can access through the links button on My Boot. But I wish he'd get back to "She Hates My Futon," because I've enjoyed that so far. And just as a point of reference, there is no Taco Bell at Baxter and Clayton. That's 2 minutes from my house.


By Waffles on Friday, August 27, 1999 - 11:00 am:

    we should stop trying to help margret for it seems she is SO well read that our attempts prove futile......and H .....do you live in NC?


By H on Friday, August 27, 1999 - 11:36 am:

    No, Waffles; I live in St. Louis. However I do enjoy NASCAR, college basketball and barbecue, so I think that qualifies me for honorary NC citizenship.


By Waffles on Friday, August 27, 1999 - 11:51 am:

    do you smoke and drink Pepsi? If so your are indeed qualified


By Margret on Friday, August 27, 1999 - 12:02 pm:

    Don't be all sad because I rejected your links, Waffles. I would have enjoyed the existentialist ones if I wasn't a grad. school drop out, and I have to admit that I like to find sex sites myself, I am a bit of a freak like that.
    I read Swine's link he gave me, and if you didn't try it you should, because the layout of the page is just fabulous and I'm going to go back there and view code tonight and study it, because I loved it so much.
    I read Craig's silly little home page all the time. Last updated July 8.
    Thanks, everyone, for bustin' a move for me.


By H on Friday, August 27, 1999 - 12:04 pm:

    I haven't smoked since 91 and I have never had a taste for cola of any stripe, so I guess my citizenship remains exclusively tied to St. Louis, or as it is quickly becoming known, "McGwireville."

    Although I'm not much for Budweiser either.


By Waffles on Friday, August 27, 1999 - 12:14 pm:

    H you are NOT a good American my friend. Yes I took a peek at the site swine recommended. Its layout is indeed impressive. However on this infontainmentsuperhighwaymuthafucka I find at times random psychobabble boring. I read a few bits of the writing and was dulled immediately. What was the relation? The connection? The basis? The grounding? The foundation? Sometimes abstraction can be such a bore when the creator takes himself too seriously. No matter what any writer says...they write for others, to be remembered and to be heard...NEVER for themselves, so naturally when the writer alienates the reader....well it's all over from there....i need coffee...and I need it NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


By H on Friday, August 27, 1999 - 12:28 pm:

    Waffles, I assure you I am a good American. I pay my taxes, have season tickets for the University of Missouri football team, own a lawnmower and eat plenty of fat-laden foods. I also drive a Pontiac.

    Buy your comment reminds me of a funny anecdote from high school. I was acquainted with a guy who was about as "alternative" as a high schooler could get in 1984. One afternoon when the local Marine recruiter was holding court in the school cafeteria, Antonio sat himself down and engaged himself in a dialogue with the guy. Finally, after the recruiter believed he had closed the deal and gotten himself some fresh meat for the Corps, Antonio asked "Do you have to be an American to join the Marines?
    "Yes, of course. Are you not American."
    "No, I'm Un-American."

    I think Antonio later went on to work in a record store.


By Waffles on Friday, August 27, 1999 - 12:29 pm:

    http://www.heartless-bitches.com/

    http://www.virago-net.com/brillo/

    http://www.drudgereport.com/

    (sigh) My dear Margret in an ongoing effort to appease you, i have found a few more links ......(bow)......









    and if you offer any reason as to why you do not find these links of interest......such as....

    a) you have read them b) you wrote them c)you will never credit anything i offer you d) you hate me and parallel anything i say to a subsequent result of shoe horning my ass......(sigh).....

    .....well then...i will have to lunge this three hole punch to an innocent bystander...namely Joe..my suite mate....and proceed to beat him to a bloody pulp with other various office equipment while mumbling "margret REALLY likes me...margret REALLY likes me...margret REALLY likes me......"


By H on Friday, August 27, 1999 - 12:29 pm:

    "But," not "Buy." Serves me right for starting a sentence with a conjunction. Uh-oh. There goes that song . . .


By Waffles on Friday, August 27, 1999 - 12:34 pm:

    yeah H.....me an my buddies used to play games with those fucks in HS....that came as such a delight in our otherwise miserable senior year. Usually when I got the phone call...I would make up some story about how i have a scholarship for football to....say..UNC or UCLA or whatever and of course they would be asking me my stats and what position and I just fibbed my way through it all. Then the kicker came when I said I wasn't interested but I had a good friend who was...so I would give them my buddies number..tell em he always talked about driving tanks and blowing shit up. Of course minutes later he would get a call and passi ton to the next. One friend went as far as to invite the poor scmuck over for dinner only to split for the evening and have his hippie parents floored when Staff Sgt. Jones shoes up to recruit their son.

    women should be available for the draft


By H on Friday, August 27, 1999 - 12:39 pm:

    I still play that game, Waffles. Only now I do it with guys that call wanting to sell me insurance, I mean "peace of mind."


By Sorabji on Friday, August 27, 1999 - 06:19 pm:


By Jinafishes on Friday, August 27, 1999 - 06:52 pm:

    That is some fucking sick shit there.


By Saint eyebeat on Saturday, August 28, 1999 - 08:53 am:

    saint eyebeat is not sick. saint eyebeat has fervor.


By J on Saturday, August 28, 1999 - 10:44 am:

    I use to call my x-next door neighbor anus,to his face.God,I get along with all my neighbors,but this guy was just an asshole,I just wanted him to know I knew he was.He moved about 6 years ago,his wife was fucking half the people on the block,I miss them like a sore asshole.


By Margret on Saturday, August 28, 1999 - 01:02 pm:

    Umm. Thanks, Mark.
    I have to admit that I had never been to either of those sites.
    And a follow-up: it turns out I am squeamish, too.


By Margret on Saturday, August 28, 1999 - 01:11 pm:

    Waffles: off the hook. In keeping with having been terrified by Mark's burnt offerings, I decided to revisit my casual dismissal of the more seemingly innocuous ones. While I have read and read and read Also Sprach Zarathustra (read and read and read and read), I actually am enjoying the Scarlet Letters site. When you catch my attention with the disclaimer, I will give you a click through, dig? Anyway, so far the site is very pretty, and as we all know by now -- though I don't have the disease as bad as some (ahemcystcoughahem), I am total surface and style over substance twit anyway -- if you accept the dichotomy, which doubtless everyone is way too cool and deconstructive to do.
    I will be continuing my pretentious and self-important survey of the rest fo the offerings throughout the day. Also, just FYI for those of you what give a shit, I umm updated my site again.
    To build a temple, a temple must first be destroyed.
    http://www.peakpeak.com/~mebailey/index.html
    I don't do that tagging shit, I'm not a juvie, so cut and paste it.


By BigKevin on Saturday, August 28, 1999 - 02:03 pm:


By Swine on Saturday, August 28, 1999 - 08:28 pm:

    you've done horrible things to my head, you evil back-alley trick.


By J on Sunday, August 29, 1999 - 03:17 am:

    Ha!Swine is in charge of my Mom,Pimp her out,she won,t know it anyway.I talked to Mrs.Robinson(leslie the crazy nurse)I sent her a card from here)I thought she would be here by now.I told her how I could never have a boob job,think about being in the nursing home,and the attendent is feeling you up while he,s feeding you some potatoe soup.Then she told me about some of the old dudes that had the first penile implants,she said they were always up,and you couldn,t turn them on their stomaches,I guess you would have had to hear us,but I laughed till I cried.


By Gee on Friday, September 3, 1999 - 06:01 am:


By Simon on Friday, September 3, 1999 - 04:39 pm:


By Rhiannon on Friday, September 3, 1999 - 05:11 pm:


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