often when i'm on the internet and have run out of fun things to do, i go read the diaries and weblogs of anorexic girls. they're facinating to me. I have bunches of them bookmarked. The thing that gets me hooked on them is that they're all the same. While other people with other mental problems or habits have different reasons, every anorexic girl on the planet seems to have the same brain. People have different reasons to drink or do heroine or smoke crack all day, and they all have different thoughts and ideas about it. But ana girls (and they like to call themselves that too, screen names like *ANA-Angel* or ~P0lly_AnA~ or etc), they have only one brain, and one voice. One thought: We are Borg. We are fat. That's why i read them. It's like some weird reverse-addiction with them. You can make someone stop drinking, but you can't make someone eat. And even if their hair is falling out and you can see their bones through their skin, they still think they're 400lbs. And it's ALWAYS the same shit, entry after entry. And i must have read 100 of these journals by now. But they're ALL the same- Must loose 20 pounds this month. Must get to 110. Got to 110. I'm such a fat pig! Gotta get to 98. 98 pounds. I'm ugly. Try for 90. -Around this point they usually eat nothing but no-fat yogurt every other day and wonder why they feel faint.- Voyeurism, and maybe it's wrong, but i don't think they're stupid. They can't be stupid, they're always coming up with the most ingenious ways to starve themselves. they never think of it as suicide. They just want to look like a supermodel who probably weighs twice what they do by the end. But they won't belive that. They think the doctors that treat them are so evil. "How dare they tell me how i'm supposed to look! They don't control me!" they always talk about control. Must control weight, must control food intake, must control body. As if anyone can do that. They don't even consider normal healthy diet programs. They eat a cracker with no-fat cream cheese and then jog for 2 hours. It's spooky, how they can ignore their bodies like that. As if next they're going to decide never to go to the bathroom again. it's all spooky. i think if anyone looked at my web history list they would be worried about me.

i'm at my grandmother's right now, in florida, for the holidays. here in her room next to her computer there's a photo of me two xmas's ago at my mother's house in michigan, with my mother, my aunt, and my cousin. i was 140 lbs then and i look like i just got out of auschwizt. my face is gaunt and drawn. i have no hips, no thighs. right now i weigh 148. my step dad yesterday told me how much better i look than the last time i saw them. and here i am dying, just DYING, to get back down to 140. it's that one fucking pair of jeans that tortures me. well, not actually dying. i ate 3 1/2 of my gram's homemade xmas cookies after dinner last night. so yeah. i was down to 144 a few weeks ago. before the two parties in one week where mass quantities of white russian eggnog were consumed.

it's stupid really. clearly my body is most comfortable around 150. it's only when i try to get thinner that i start acting crazy and doing crazy things. annorexia baffles me. there are times, though rare, when i can endure long periods of hunger. by long periods, i mean a couple weeks. where the hunger doesn't hurt, doesn't bother, doesn't stop productivity. i can eat just barely enough to make the hunger go away for a couple hours, and it's fine. but most of the time when i feel hungry it's like the world has stopped spinning on its axis until i can eat something. but these girls who are annorexic, how can they ignore such a primal biological urge? it's not that they don't feel hungry, they just choose not to eat. they just live that way. i can understand feeling fat and needing control. i can't understand ignoring hunger, to the point of death.

"but most of the time when i feel hungry it's like the world has stopped spinning on its axis until i can eat something." i've been thinking about this recently. i know i'm all atkinsed up like a disciple of christ, but i think the desperation of hunger is carb related. at least for me. it used to be if i skipped breakfast i'd be pushing into acid flashback territory by 1pm. now i'm fine. i don't eat nearly as much, though. maybe that has more to do with it.

yeah, you're right. it's the cookies. any carb binge fucks me up for days afterward. and the only time i really carb binge is when i've been drinking. if i could only stop drinking. but fuck, despite being uninvited to xmas in florida by my mother a week ago, i'm in suburban florida hell with a pack of fucking crazy family people. i *need* alcohol. and chocolate.... because i ran out of valium. it's the only way i'm going to survive this week, until i can get to key west for new years. nate, are you having trouble avoiding carbs? do you slip at all? if so, what makes you slip? if not, why not?

god, i hope i can get a decent margarita somewhere around here.

Margaritas mmmmmmmmmmm. I can't drink like I used to, though. I am becoming a lightweight for the first time in my life. Sarah, how tall are you? I have a friend of mine who freaks if she is over 130 lbs, but at 145 she can still wear my clothes because she is so much taller than I am. She looks gaunt with anything less than 140. Even at 140. My mom and her twins are total opposites when it comes to their weights. My mom has always been the "heavy" one. She looks really good at 135 but usually stays at about 150-160. She doesn't look too big until she hits 180. My aunt (her twin sister) can weigh it at 135 and still be the same size as me at 105 even though we are the exact same height. She has always been too concerned with being skinny and taken extreme measures to be thin and looks old because of it. Sometimes an extra 5 or 10 lbs can mean the difference as to whether or not you look healthy.

so true, but it's so weird. i'm only 5'3", which means i'm "supposed to" weigh around 120-125, but i am peculiarly muscular, which is where a lot of the 150 lbs comes from, which is why i look gaunt and hollow at 140 lbs. at 150 i'm a size 8, 144-149 i'm a size six. once i bought a size 4 skirt, but that was a fluke. 150 seems to be where my body wants to be, where it stabilizes, but to me i'm just a little chubby. i guess 144 is ideal, 140 too little. yeah, 5 lbs can make a big difference. eri, let's try to get together in january so i don't miss you before you're shipped away.

i haven't had much trouble at all. i haven't been drinking (i had a chivas 18yr to wrap up my meal at fogo de chao in dallas last week, that's it this month.) and i mostly stopped drinking caffine. i understand that caffine causes carb cravings. atkins advantage bars help, i think. when i get really baked and i just want something sweet i can have one of those. my biggest challenge was when a lady at work baked this butterscotch chocolate chunk cookies. she is an excellent baker and she followed me around with them all day. 'one won't hurt, nate. look at what you're missing.' but i'm stubborn. i drink a lot of water. maybe 2 gallons a day. but really, i think it is just that i'd rather be eating meat. last night i cooked a perfect tbone. it was great. you never get tired of that. this morning, i'm going to fry half a package of breakfast sausage. i love sausage. fogo de chao is the epitome of nate eating. when i got home that night my piss smelled like meat. meat is king, so nate has no problems with carbs. i guess that's what i'm getting at. though i do get sad, sometimes. we went to this bbq and the whole way there my coworkers talked about how great the rolls are. i was sad i couldn't try them, but i didn't suffer any real temptation.

are you going to do this fovever Nate, or just to drop a few pound? Do you have a goal or anything? Or are you just going carb-free for the rest of your life?

i will do as dr. atkins commands. which is to slowly re-introduce carbs into your diet until you achieve a nice balance. that is, once you've acheived the ideal weight. this is 23 days in and i've lost nearly 20lbs.

Nate, you fucknozzle! In Dallas and you didn't even e-mail me for drinks. Sigh...must not be your friend no more. :(

i didn't have a minute to myself, tiggy. otherwise i'd have pinged you. i'll be out there periodically.

I may be out in the bay area some myself. I got a new job and one of my company's vendors is there. In fact, I was scheduled to be in Freemont last week, but the trip was cancelled.

20 lbs in 23 days. holy fuckamoley. if all i ate was tbones for the rest of my life i don't think i could achieve that. good on ya.

the slowly spreading vortex that is my ass is ashamed. fremont really isn't that exciting, tigster. don't be too disappointed that you missed out.

Hooray for you, Nate. At my family's Christmas Eve party, I saw my cousin Lisa for the first time in about six months and she's lost 52 pounds on the Atkins diet. She looks fantastic. And while the rest of has had to use crackers, she got to eat her artichoke dip with a spoon out of her own little bowl. My formerly anorexic cousin, Jen is looking good these days. She has been doing well for a while, but this is the first time I've seen her with hips and boobs since she was in high school. She just had a baby, Hannah. I tried to hold Hannah and gave up after about five minutes. I felt like I needed one of my aunts to supervise me like they do when the six year olds want to hold her. Maybe I am out of practice. Or perhaps I am not supposed to hold a newborn ever.

kinda like michael jackson. . .

sure, except when Hannah throws her tiny little fist towards my face, my nose can withstand the blow.

lol

My wife lost over 80 lbs. We thought it was do to the MS making her expend so much energy just moving around. Unforunately we were wrong. It was her Diabetes. For some reason her blood sugar went way way up. This caused the pounds to just melt away. But, it also caused her MS to flair up. The last several weeks have not been to good. But, her blood sugar is now better. And, she's getting grumpy. That's always a good sign. Maybe in a few weeks she'll have most of her strength back. I just hate filling the seringes for her insulin. I'm needle phobic.

what does your kitchen smell like nate?

at the moment, the shrimp shells rotting at the bottom of the trash can (i have to do something about that.) oh, and it kind of smells like bacon over by the stove. what does your kitchen smell like?

curry, at the moment. i just took out the compost, but that doesn't usually smell anyway. so, yeah, curry and saffroned rice. saffron is *really* expensive. this upsets/disturbs me.

im not sure. i love bacon but i fucking hate the stench that lingers for days after you cook it. same with most meats. meaty kitchen.

other stuff stinks too (curry, for example). food in general seems to make smells which linger in the kitchen, especially spicy/heavily seasoned food. of course, i haven't cooked meat in years, so i may have forgotten the intensity of the meatiness.

My kitchen smells like cat food and whatever is in the garbage bag that has to go out to the curb.

living in said meaty stench, i don't think i notice it so much. someone like platy, on the other hand, would probably think i stink like meat. meaty nate.

I actually don't really notice meat smell. Sometimes it makes your sweat smell weird, but so does a lot of creepy vegan food. (Curry being a case in point). Now my kitchen smells like puke. Thanks, Mr. Bell.

Art Bell's in your kitchen?

ahahahah. get it? Mr. Bell could be Art Bell. because Art Bell is a man and his last name is Bell. get it? huh? get it? that is funny as fuck, jack. funny as fuck.

smells like puke? funny as fuck! smells like puke? funny as fuck! smells like puke? funny as fuck! smells like puke? funny as fuck! smells like puke? funny as fuck! sort of.

works for me.

NOT REALLY CRUNCHY THOUGH

on account of the creamy little hands.

Mr. Bell has no hands. He has only toes.

YOU CALL THOSE TOES?

Hey,don't diss the toes!!! Jesus!

Tip on making bacon: When I cook up some good ol' greasy bacon, I don't fry it... I bake it. Frying it makes the kitchen smell like bacon for days after cooking it b/c the grease gets everywhere. All I do is put the bacon on a cookie sheet (that has a lip so that the grease doesn't spill out of course) and put it in the oven at 350 degrees and cook it for approx. 12 minutes. I usually don't time it, I just check on it every couple of minutes until it is the right color. Also, I find that Oscar Mayer bacon cooks better and tastes better than most other kinds. But the bacon comes out perfect. Not too crispy, but not all fatty and uncooked. Perfect.

that's a great idea. i'll try that in the morning. more bacon per batch and less work, too. but you can't fry your cornbread in the grease. i have a leg of lamb resting on my stovetop. when heather gets home, i will carve it.

I always save the bacon grease,I use it instead of oil when I make cornbread,and wilted lettace salad.

how do you save it? my ex used to put it in an old can, but then the biscuits and gravy always tasted metallic.

Put it in an old mug or somewhing. My dad mixes it wih birdseed.

the best way to save bacon grease is to save spaghetti jars or any glass jars really. Make sure you wash it once the contents are used up. The glass jar won't leave any funny taste in the grease, plus you can put the lid on it.

i drank well over 2000 calories each day in bloody marys, or pina coladas, or margaritas, or key lime shooters, or martinis, or gimlets, or sadly, a little of all of the above, while i was in key west. drunk ass drunk to the third power. starting about 3-4 p.m. every day. two (dozen) for the price of one oysters on the half shell. every day. conch fritters. hogfish steaks with key lime sauce. 1/2 pound chocolate chip cookies from street vendors. i also went snorkeling and saw an 8 foot white tipped reef shark. i've seen lots of sharks before but never one that big or that beautiful. i had two rides from two different strangers on the backs of their harleys. i have the photos to prove it to. i'd just ask them for a ride, hop on the back, and off we'd go. they never asked my name and always dropped me off wherever i wanted, and never saw them again. so, i just got home and need to dry out in a major way. i drank so much i often woke up drunk, and if not drunk, then with the shakes. so i've decided to train for the 1/2 marathon again this year, even though last year i said i'd never do it again. i'm doing it to force myself to stop drinking.

this is how stupid i am: after yoga class yesterday morning, which i had to drag myself to the 10:30 class when i'm usually up way before the 9 a.m. class, i felt like shit and came home and went to bed. i was in a lot of pain. a stabbing headache, my whole body ached, and i couldn't move. when i did get up a few hours later, i couldn't think straight, couldn't get my arms and legs to move properly, sorta stumbled around. i peed, ate some scrambled eggs (barely) and went back to bed. then the fever started. by 5 p.m. i was in the emergency room. i felt the same way i felt last time i had a kidney infection, and thought it might be the same thing. basically like i had a wretched viral disease, cancer, or that i was about to die. after pee tests, a catheter, blood tests, an IV, and god knows what else, everything came back negative. i barfed up the eggs in the trash bin. they had no idea what was wrong with me. but they gave me vicodin and some other non steriod pain reliever and sent me home. so this morning i feel okay. not great, but not like i was just about to die yesterday. so my guess is either i had some sort of very short-lived bug from eating raw oysters... or... what i truly suspect is that i just had one incredibly nasty delayed hangover. alcohol, folks. it's bad for you.

i had a bitchin hangover from cheap wine yesterday too. my head hurt so bad i was nauseated from the endorphines. we went to a bbq anyway as my usual MO is wake up, eat, take 4 advil and pass out from the ibuprofen. no can do. early bbq. (its 80+ degrees here, people bbq in Jan) i proceed to try and "smoke" the hangover out and "flood" it out with pacificos. no dice. by 6 im dizzy, seeing double and ready to go. i crash at 7. wake up at 1 a.m., with nico. she's scared. the wind is battering the house something fierce. 50+ mph winds, ultra clear skies, desert conditions and heat lightning are making for a pretty surreal night. i stay up until the witching hour watching Laura Croft tomb raider. I feel so much better, but yeah....bitchin hangover from cheap wine. god damn., oh....bacon tip....dice some onions. on a skillet with ultra low heat, lay your bacon on top of simmering onions.doesnt stink up the crib as much. cover the skillet to cook faster. at the end you have carmelized onions good for french onion soup.

I didn't drink much this holiday season. I didn't have time. It was one catastrophe after another. My mother decided to drink for me. Our last night in Missouri she was so drunk off of her rum & cokes that she was passing out in her chair upstairs. I made her get up and wake up a little and she almost fell downstairs. I have never seen anyone that fucked up in my life. I just knew she was going to puke half the morning away and have a major hangover. She slept (or passed out in bed) soundly and woke up as if she hadn't had a single drink the night before. Kinda scared me. It makes me wonder if she gets that fucked up so often it doesn't have an effect on her anymore. I dunno. Right now my kitchen smells like cleaners. I cleaned the oven yesterday (to the best of my Easy Off ability) and some of it hit my legs and I am covered in rashes and have a couple of open bleeding wounds from that crap. We didn't cook because my "friend" had her son come over unannounced so that I could stop my day and give him a haircut and then called and said she had a date with some chick she met at a club, but would be back early. She didn't get home until this morning and we didn't have enough meat in the house to feed her kid too so we ordered pizza. I stepped on a scale at my best friends house in MO and found that I am staying steady between 110 and 115 lbs. I am really happy with that. My ribs aren't sticking out anymore and I don't look anorexic anymore. Sarah, just email me when you want to come out. It looks like anytime in January will be good (except the 11th) and February looks good too.

i been so out of shape this past semester. i was used to playing sports basically every season in high school and then i started sitting around and eating lovely dining hall food (free ben + jerry's is great in some ways but terrible in others). but this winter i'm planning on losing those 10 pounds i gained and i started today with my first kickboxing class. i enjoyed the workout, but also felt sort of strange about it. i guess i still haven't come to grips with a culture that tries to lose weight while other people starve. its a part of society that i used to scorn, and still do, in threory, but i'm participating. its complicated. but anyways, it does feel good to make my body work, and i plan on skiing a lot too so hopefully i will be in better shape soon.

I went to the gym on Monday. Well actually, when I say went, I mean I sat in the office while my friend joined up. I need to buy gym shoes. Then I'm going to kick ass. Or flab. Or sumthin

I never have the gusto to go and work out by myself. I don't have anyone to work out with and so I get lazy. I should go work out something fierce, because gravity is really beginning to attack me and I am very out of shape, but I just haven't done it yet. Maybe you guys can enspire me to get off of my ass and excersize.

this time of year is absolute HELL for regular gym goers. it's a fucking zoo with all the New Years Resolutioners in there, jumping and peddaling and pumping and pushing and dropping weights on their feet. but once spring break hits, they are not so Resolute anymore, and suddenly it's back to normal and the true gym freaks have all the room they need.

home gym home gym! i went to fogo de chao again tonight. somehow, all this meat chased with ice tea can give my GI a twirl. now, this is gross, but it just freaked me out: there was a drip of shit on the wall behind me. about the height of my mid-back as i was sitting. i don't know how it happened. i can't figure it out. i'm sure it was mine, i would have noticed it as i came into the stall. it must have gone between the seat and the commode and somehow took an 85 degree turn towards the sky as it escaped. it makes no sense. but there it was. makes me wonder about the back of my shirt, but apparently i am safe.

you know, that is really gross. home gyms: the only advantage to them is that you're the only one who's going to use it. but i've never used one that was as versatile or effective as the various equipment in an actual gym. home gyms are also a little awkward to use. oh, and working at home takes a wicked kind of will power. there's so many other things to be distracted by at your house, but when you go to the gym, there's just you, the equipment, a thousand sweaty, agressive, steroid-pumped egomaniacs, and a burning desire to get it over with and get the hell out.

I finally got around to visiting the new campus gym once or twice a week this past semester. It was great. I guess I just needed to give my body an excuse to burn some calories, because most of that early college weight gain just fell off me like it was amputated.

i have a bowflex and a treadmill. and if i used them both, i'd be a cardio king with huge muscles. i know this to be true. i watched the bowflex VHS tape.

nate, have you still not had any carbs whatsoever? no sweets or bread?

i made atkins cornbread and he eats the bars. they're too sweet, really. oh, and he cheats sometimes.

he cheats with the bowflex or the treadmill?

i cheated in dallas. i ate half a roll with some bbq. i ate some bbq. multiple times a day.

bbq doesn't get any better than here. half a roll, does that even count? are those atkins bread products any good?

i've been doing lo carb. not a strict atkins (no pee tests). i've been trying to stick to 20 grams of carbs but i'm comfortable with going up to 40. no grains, no added sugars, no fruit. i was pleased to learn that ranch dresing has 1g per 2 tbsp. makes a nice addition to my spinach, feta, olive and bacon crumble salad for lunch.

do you make that salad or get it somewhere? do you like eating low carb dave? i remember you said once you kept falling off the wagon. hell, i wish i could keep food down these days. my sister got me an awesome cookbook for xmas called Chocolate And Baking. yeah baby. a nice addendum to my Chocolate Ecstacy cookbook. i already made 2 things out of it. the recipes are a little off because it's a british book, so you gotta kinda tweak them a bit. but man that's some good shit.

i was probably ok with the roll. you're supposed to avoid white flour, but i think i can swing it here and there. i think i can handle 40g a day. 20g is only the first two weeks with atkins, dave.. i weighed in under 180lbs this morning. i'm right at the weight i was when heather met me the first time, which i had achieved by a daily running routine over 3 months. i was back to the same starting point six weeks ago.

so are all the adverts right when they say you get lots more poontang when you look lean and fit? im thinking of looking lean and fit and i wonder about that.

pretty much. you have to smoke cigarettes and drink diet coke if you really want to be in the poontang zone.

patrick you always look lean. silly. tha atkins cornbread was A LOT better than i thought it would be. it has that aftertaste but the texture is nice and it rises really well.

i didn't notice the aftertaste. though i haven't been noticing the aftertase of diet coke lately, either.

lean maybe. fit never. i really just wanted to use the word "poontang". such a riotous word ya think? i drink diet dr. pepper and smoke cigarettes. im sorta in the poontang-hold-pattern-zone.

Weight isn't the only factor in fitness. You might weigh the same as you did while you were running, but you probably had more muscle then. Muscle weighs more than general flesh. I haven't weighted myself in over a year. I'm a large person, with a little extra stuff hanging around my waist and thighs. I don't get sick much and I've got strong legs, I'd rather feel good than be lean.

i'm cool with lo carb. the only carb i really miss is beer. which i want. RIGHT NOW! other than that, it's fine. i usually buy that salad at the salad bar and get a hunk of rotisserie breast and wing along with it if i have the cash. sometimes chicken is really good and other times it's plain nasty. right now, it's pretty good. nate, i probably weigh as much as you and heather combined. i was 180 when i was a skinny goth boy. what a goofball i was. size 31 levis and i could actually wear a L t-shirt. wierd.

what a boring little post that was.

No, it' snot. I'm still trying the reconcile "skinny goth boy" with "180" pounds. You must be very tall.

i cashed in a *gulp* Gap gift certificate yesterday and got a pair of cords off the sale rack for $12. They are 34s. Im pleased.

i can totally visualize dave as a skinny goth boy. but i prefer to visualize him as a version of Sully, from Monsters Inc. don't ask me why.

YES!

i've been fitting into 33's. comfortably.

i have really wide hips. always have. fuck nate, dont prompt me into a 48 hour binge/puke fit eh.

such a slender guy as you? you must look like a bitch from behind. don't grow your hair out.

are you TRYING to give me a complex. its a trade off. an x over here, means an o over there.

yeah, dave as sully is actually pretty fitting. except, dave is a little smarter and a little more grumpy.

i'm actually more like red on that 70s show. except that it's only funny on tv.

Trace says that Red is his hero and runs around quoting him to the kids all of the time.

hey eri, i have a long weekend coming up this weekend - we have monday off for MLK day. i just wrote my friends Kim and Chris who live in San Antonio to see if they had plans this weekend, and asked if i could come stay. i'm thinking of driving down saturday morning and driving back monday morning. if it works out, would you and trace and the kids be free this weekend to hook up? maybe lunch/brunch on sunday? let me know.

next stop: droopy, Ft. Worth, TX.

We don't have any plans that I know of, other than possibly babysitting for a friend on Fri nite. You are definately welcome to come over or go out or whatever! Email me and I will give you the address and phone number so we can get make plans when you get here!

13 lbs. 14 days. the goal has become to wink out of existence on halloween. nothing but a pile of clothes containing a partially digested rib steak. maybe i'll be driving at the time.

People will think you've been Raptured.

Maybe we can clone the ribsteak,by God Dave you won't go down.

Maybe that rib will make Eve,how about some 57 sauce? This is my idea.

i prefer stubb's beef marinade. when i was about 9, me and my brother got busted popping heinz 57 sauce packets all over the outside wall of a car dealership. you stomp on them and the contents go thbbbt! all over the place. the owner got a bucket of soapy water and a scrub brush and made us scrub the wall clean. he was hella pissed off and scary.

goddamn people i just have to say that i am downright skinny these days. this is totally baffling to me. i did nothing but chow down all day saturday and sunday. monday and tuesday i was "good" and then last night i commisserated with a friend who recently walked in on her boyfriend fucking another woman. i brought salmon, salad, two bottles of wine, and three HUGE brownies, and a box of chocolates. we went through most of the food, a bottle of wine, and then went out for a couple rounds. when i got home i ate ice cream and flank steak. for lunch yesterday i ate a substantial piece of crustless cheesecake. and then there are times when all i have to do is LOOK at a piece of pie and i gain five pounds or if i even think about eating a carb i gain ten. i bloat right up like a balloon. it makes no fucking sense. the only trend that stays consistent is that the more fat i eat, the less i weigh. it's almost as if i'm discovering that carb/protein intake can vary radically, but all that really matters is that i'm eating enough fat. skinny, i tell you. easy size 6, which for me is skinny. i'm going the road of dave. all that'll be left of me is a hip bone and dollop of fat from my ass, which no matter how much i weigh, will never cease from prominent existence.

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm ass does CNN make it a point to carry Bush's retarded speeches on the most mundane of topics all day long all the time? they never had repeated live feeds of clinton's speeches. god damn, need more cough syrup.

LADIES and GENTLEMEN, I'm a COOK. that shit is the best. woah shit, there's a resturaunt is austin. someone send sarah to investigate.

you know what i love about CNN's coverage of Bush's speeches? when they're showing it live and he says something moderatly important, then about five seconds later it scrolls by on the ticker. THANKS

god damn liberal media.

http://www.gnn.tv/redux/ watch the movie. i almost peed my pants.

all I got was like a screensaver with the audio.

do you have windows media player 9? or 8? depending on which you clicked? you might need to upgrade to a later version of this fine microsoft product.

yeh. that.

i downloaded the fullscreen version. "white america" is good, too. somewhere on that site.

damn

i want to be annorexic but i need help doing it. help me

i cant do atkins because im a vegetarian ....... but get this i am 5' 3" and i weigh 195, i NEED to lose weight, please help me!!

well, your brain certainly isn't weighing you down....

heh

Dammit, wisper! That totally wipes out the comment I was going to make about the easiest way to lose 10 lbs of ugly fat was to rest her neck on a train track!

maybe it's a him, not a her.

Jaybo,give yourself alot of enemas and make yourself puke after every meal,eat ex-lax every day.Good Luck!

"i cant do atkins because im a vegetarian" That's a load of crap. Eat firm tofu (like this) for your protein and avoid empty carbs like the plague. No pasta, no bread, only high fiber veggies like broccoli, cauliflower, and the like. If you're not vegan, eat more cheese. Definately eat more olive and grapeseed oil. Avacados are good, too. A high protein diet is quite doable while still eating vegetarian.

9 hours too late, semmy boy. ya gotta be quick!

I know that everyone always warns about the life-long, harsh effects of anorexia and bulemia, but I'm so tired of not seeing any weight loss. I've made myself puke a few times, but it takes too long, I want it to just all come up on it's own all at once, and that doesn't happen....what's the easiest way to wean myself away from *food!*?

How about coming to the understanding that *food!* is good for you and not abusing the hell out of your body. Hit the gym, not the vomitorium.