that damn air conditioner scares me. it sounds quite spooky. I keep on getting mad bombing headaches. like right now. I want some motherfucking swedish fish, NOW DAMNIT! I want to kiss someone. I want to go back in time and DESTROY D.H. Lawrence before he writes any of his crap books. what an ass. I hope his death hurt. I have no clue what I'm talking about. If someone was enceased in cement, like, had liquid cement poured all around them, and they were dead, would their hair grow and eventually make cracks or even break up the cement like the roots of plants? I want to go buy a small amount of that nifty red carpet, of the flavor that comes in rolls that people always walk on... and cut out 2 good sized squares and attach them permanently to the bottom of a pair of shoes. that would fucking rule. walking on red carpet! sigh the UK Subs have a song called "Here comes Alex" my favorite damn song in the world...sorta. I want a shirt that has a speaker sewn into the front that plays that continuously, and on the back i want it to say in readable letters "There goes Alex!" hahah everyone thinks I am so completely fucked up on drugs today im not. but if this is what I'm like without drugs...::shudder:: I tried on a dress today that i found in the half of my closet that my family uses for storage. it's a size 10. didn't fit. fuck. i think i wear roundabouts a size 31 waist in pants, but more like 32-33 length...any help here? I like dresses. they're neat-o I want some video games. ooh...! i want nifty email! i am so eager for monday, roundabout 12-1...the mail's gonna come! huzzah! I actually rounded up a small amount of money and stamps so i just need time and i will send people stuff. just you wait... ok. I'm not done now. but I'll stop while I'm miles behind.

I want you to fuck the shut up!

Everyone, let's give a round, warm of applause to Zephyr...

Hole ass complete a being just am I. Sorry.

fuck apologies. it's better that way. just say it and let it stand. discomfort is cathartic.

Nah I wanna see Antigone grovel.

finally rained in tejas last night. you'd think antigone would be in a better mood. saw my mother last night. she'd just been in new mexico. she brought me holy dirt from el santuario de equipulas in the chimayo valley. all latino catholic churches stuck out in a desert have a miracle or a relic or bleeding jesus or a crying madonna or vice versa or whatever else. this one has holy dirt. saw my sister last night. she'd driven up from new braunfels. she brought me a bottle of scotch called pig's nose, because it's a smooth as a pig's nose. it was pretty good. i ended up drinking most of the bottle last night. i didn't get them anything. last night when i came home i parked in my usual spot. there was a drag on the ignition when i pulled my key out. when i got out, there where two white lights on at the back of my car. i've had alot of electrical problems with my car, and i was really drunk, so i started messing with the hand controls underneath my steering wheel thinking that was the problem - sometimes it sticks. also, the engine wouldn't turn over. i thought maybe it was the battery. i was pissed. but the bright lights were still on at the back. this morning at 9:41 i lay in bed with a massive headache and thought about my car. i got out of bed, went out to my car, and took it out of reverse. miraculously, the engine turned over. back in the house i went into the bathroom. something scurried across the floor. a lizard - a baby gecko. i smiled. i like leezards.

droopy, you're a pretty interesting man.

He is. Droopy rocks. He's one of my favorite sorabjiites.

Droopy, still have that gecko? I've always loved geckos. damn neatest little buggers ever.

Your hair doesn't grow when you die, your scalp recedes. Or that's the version I heard.

Well...it's quite a common myth that it does when you die...oh well...anyone have a clue about this?

i've heard what tired heard - that the scalp shrinks after you die and it looks like the hair grew. saw another gecko in the house last night, zephyr. don't know if it was the same one. gecko(e)s are all over the damn place where i live. why, thank you isolde. but i think that gee just found a tactful way to say "you're weird, droopy."

Oh, so I said it so politely you didn't notice? Damn. I'll have to try harder next time. I saw a frog last night. He was huge. And your scalp does shrink.

i assume everybody thinks i'm weird, amiga.

Ah. Bon.

I couldn't use the toilets at the reservation campground to "deploy some troops" as apparently there was some sort of daddy-long-legs cnvention going on in there - yick. My friends call them "Humpty-Dance Spiders."

That's awesome.

i remember going to camp and learning the humpty dumpty rap. sorta dorky. daddy-long-legs are the most poisonous spiders in the world. but their fangs are so soft that they can't break any skin. they're scavengers. don't eat that daddy-long-legs!

weird is not the same thing as interesting. weird is a dime a dozen. does anyone know who Rocky Raccoon is?

it's a beatles song. from the white album. my apartment seems to be overrun with geckos tonight. everytime i turn around i see another one (or the same one) zipping across the floor or up a wall. makes a house a home. i'm ten cents a dance.

Why would anyone think your hair grows when you're dead? What would be the energy source?

maybe the hair follicles don't like dead bodies any more than the rest of us. maybe they're trying to run away.

Point well taken,thats a perspective I'd never considered.

I think he must be right.

who? maybe it's the same reason why men go bald.

You think the hair runs away because it has some kind of a sixth sense that the guys gonna die?If you could calculate a time frame on this theory,you could put the phone-a-psychics out of business,and start a life insurance company---with a 900 number,and not have to work again,at least till the keratin corps caught up with you,hell,I'll man the phone lines for you,and I feel sure I can include J in this also.

great. more physics and biology classes for me. phone a physic! how does the theory of relativity effect YOU? "by phoning a physic, i found out that i was about to die...so i made this commercial!" (dies) teeheehee!

i got the solution take ample amounts of psychoactive drugs and then have this conversation. the answer will be there, in your hair, trying to get away

speaking of the daddy longlegs thing, what happens if you have an open cut and they don't need to break the skin?

what are the chances that they'll be crawling on you leg and drooling in the first place? think about it. they know we can crush them in about half a second. the poison is probably to avoid being eaten.

Nah, it's for their prey. If it was defensive, the fangs would be strong enough to break skin.

what do they eat, anyway?

Well, considering I'm out cold 8 hours or more a night and they inhabit my apartment (not in any record-breaking quantities), pretty damn high. Well, I dunno about drooling, and fortunately I don't have any open cuts at the moment, but still, has anyone been killed in this manner?

Daddy Long Legs are not poisonous.

down in austin, at my family's farm, there's a wooden box sitting outside next to a shed. probably been there for a hundred years. since i was a kid it always had daddy longlegs in it...a mass of them all bunched together like a giant hairball (or, as i noticed later in life, a huge pussy). when we were kids we would open the box and watch the big spiderball squirm and throb. my sister fell in it, once. she freaked. but she didn't die. today's gecko sighting was this morning in my bathroom. he was on the side of the bathtub. apparently, lizards will just freeze when they see a threat. i sat there for while and checked him out. he kept his tail and head held up high. when i first started seeing them, they were pink and the skin had a wet, rubbery look like a salamander's. now the skin looks dry and the pink is paler and rings are forming on the tail. growing up fast. soon he'll be gone.

something i dug up about the: daddy longlegs

Droop,we have the geckos here,but we also have alot of chameleons.Something fun I do with the chameloens,is wear them for earings.When you catch them,their mouths pop open,and I stick them to my earlobes,and their little mouths clamp down immediatly,and they hang from my ears,this is especially fun for me,if someone unexpected comes to my door,I just answer it and act like nothing is amiss,and watch the poor stranger try to not look at my ears.Unfortunately,they only hang on for short amouts of time,like 5 minuets tops,so I can't wear them to town,which I think would be dandy fun.I have never seen the little geckos mouth pop open when I catch them,or I would wear them,too.

Ah, now I feel safe. Plus I won't have to worry about anyone wanting to visit me.

I really dislike spiders. We've recently reached an agreement that as long as they don't touch me, they can exist peacefully in my house..that was a big step. But daddy long-legs wierd me out.

i had a strange burst of insect compassion the other night. As i was preparing to hang some negatives to dry in my bathtub, i noticed a moth. I made a mad swat at it with no luck, although i probably injured it. AS he fluttered and doged in my tub, i realized what terror he/she may have been experiencing....so in a fit of compassion, i captured it and released it out the door.......

...where it was promptly devoured by a bat. That was a truly enlightening article on daddy-long-legs, btw.

i remember one morning in edinborogh, i found a spider on my suitcase. my best friend had the room next door, and she's an archniphobe. so i found a kleenex and coaxed the spider onto it, which i promtly threw out the window into the wind. felt much less guilty about that than flushing it down the toilet.

there was a roach crawling on my hand. I flung it off and stomped on it with my shoe.

*shudders* I haven't yet seen a roach here...THANK GOD!

I hate roaches