| THIS IS A READ-ONLY ARCHIVE FROM THE SORABJI.COM MESSAGE BOARDS (1995-2016). |
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I'm a pretty private person. Yet I post here. I find it hard to be me in front of people I don't know well. I don't open up much. I don't know if its healthy or not. I think I can post here because honestly theres not much of a chance of any of you turning up in my little city. Sometimes I wish I could be you. |
I think we're all exhibitionists in our own way. Not nesc with pictures...but with words... Grrr. I know I am anyway. I do my online journaling, and I guess maybe a part of me really digs the fact that there's people reading it, people interested in my life. Then there's the other part that just does it because well, I'm a geek and I like that sort of stuff. I think it's healthy, if you aren't someone who opens up easily, to find a means of expression..and this works... bleh. I need to shower and go to work. |
annonymity makes it easier to open the pipeline to your mind....and all the talk about meeting one another is like flirting with danger. Its the same kind of thrill i think...to think about anyway. |
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Here,I care what you think.I'm sincerely interested in what goes on in your lives.Sometimes I worry,and I share your fears[those of you who have made moves to different cities,and I can read your fear,hidden between the lines of your posts]. And,of course,theres that ever present battle we all indulge in......love,or perhaps better said,our feeble attempts at love. But its nice to know that we have this safe place.A place where we are accepted unquestionably by our peers.A place where we are loved,simply for who we are.Not for something we pretend to be,or for something someone else wants us to be.But just loved because we are "us". Well,enough of this snivelling drivel. Fuck you all,you asses :} |
I know I am much more accentuated here, both good and bad sides displayed with more abandon. But I am dishonest with you about some things that matter, partly because I have other people's secrets to keep and also because I couldn't stand for you to tear apart what's precious to me. Someone posted the other day that we were just "typing", but it's more than that. This is very real. Discount it as fantasy at your own risk. |
i also want to know who moonit wishes she could be. "Sometimes I wish I could be you." |
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ok, um nate, this goes back to those mpegs you posted. im pretty sure moonit was talking about masterbots....seeing as how they control this outpost now. |
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spider, gee and droopy will be automatically spared when i take over. it's not too late for the rest of you; righteousness and cash money can earn your redemption. i even offer sliding scale plans on both. |
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dumbass. i'm writing this down. |
cocksnot. |
asswipes |
dickwrinkle. |
cuntdrip |
crackjam |
Buttworm. |
>I'm in high school and I really dig Phish. But I've got a problem. Can >any of you guys help me with this: > >My dad was a serious Deadhead. He saw the Dead from like 79 to 95, and he >says I was conceived on the banks of the Hudson River after some great >show... he says he and my mom were inspired by the Scarlet that night to >get their groove on, or something. So anyways, when I was a baby and a >little kid and stuff, I guess I went to a lot of Dead shows... a lot of the >time we would snag a good spot, and then when the acid would kick in Mom >and Dad would sort of space out and I met the coolest people when I got to >go off on my own. So I have nothing against the Dead at all, I loved Dead >shows! "There is nothing in the world like a Grateful Dead concert", those >bumper stickers said it right, lol. > >But I also love Phish. When I was 10 dad wanted to check out this new >band, so we went and saw the boys at Red Rocks. Man I dug it so hardcore. >So now I'm all into Phish and I even went to Big Cypress with some older >kids from school who had this car that we slept in. My parents didn't know >about that one till after I left, lol, but they were cool with it. They >know they did the same thing. So here's my problem, I'm totally nuts about >Trey. I think his playing blows my fucking mind, the way he does all that >shit in YEM and Tweezer and First Tube, holy shit Jerry Garcia could never >do THAT. But when I'm listening to Phish and my dad's like "cool tunes who >is this" and I tell him its Vermonts Phinest, he's always like "That Trey >is no match for Captain Trips, the fat man could play like anything" and >I'm like, well dad, dead shows were cool and all but I don't think Garcia >is in the same league >as my boy Trey. > >That's when the problems start. If my dad's had a lot of acid that night, >like if its a weekend or he doesnt have to go to work too early the next >morning, he gets all crazy and he'll do anything to prove Jerry's better. >He takes my phish tapes and throws them out the 2nd story window(!!) and >then locks me in my room and starts blasting the Dead so I can't get out >and I have to listen! If it's 77-79 I can dig it, but sometimes he puts on >this experimental stuff from the 60s, or these shows from the 90s with >cheesy songs and effects and all this space... those are the times I just >want to kill myself. I scream and shit but he just yells that i need to >learn that jerry is the best and turns up the music even louder. i'm >talking fucking loud here, like the volume if you were at a show except in >your house. then >if he's really tripping hardcore he'll come back into my room in the middle >of the night and whisper shit in my ear about how the dead rule and i >should stop listening to treehugger pigfuckers (that's what he calls phish, >and really all people from vermont). he thinks i'm sleeping but one time i >started crying when he said that trey should die and make room for jerry so >jerry can come back, and that's the time he made me stand up and write on >the wall in marker that jerry garcia is the king of music and then he >turned off the lights and turned on just the blacklight so all his >blacklight posters were making me dizzy and then he said i had to read what >i wrote a hundred times, until i fell asleep, but i was like dad i'm >standing up how can i fall asleep and he said listen you fucking kid when i >was at dead shows i fell asleep standing up, you just haven't taken enough >drugs and then i'm like ok and he gives me more acid and we trip together >and once we're both tripping everything is a lot better and then we pretend >trey is >jerry and i'm like see dad jerry is still alive heheheh and usually he's so >fucked up he believes me and then he's like ok now that's more like it and >then i get to go to bed and life is cool. but i'd rather not have to do >this 4-5 times a week. Anyone have any ideas? > >peace, >heady nuggets |
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fuck. |
Ok, the truth is sometimes I want to kick you in the nuts, but for some reason I can't get the T1 to reach out and do it for me. Fuck you, you ass. |
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What the fuck is wrong with me? I'm having the urge to run away, but I have too many responsibilities, to my job, my family, the boy, the bills.... grr. I feel so sad and lost and I don't know why. |
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Run away this weekend to your bedroom and do something totally naughty involving sweet-scented oil and chocolate and scarlet wine and candlelight and stars and no one else but you. Look at the "You, Me and a .." thread for other ideas. Except don't even think about Czarina's suggestion, because you have to put in a lot of practice before you can hope to attain that level of naughtiness. |
It's still there but not as bad today. Weird. mmmm recreational drugs. I got 'merican candy this morning, and drew told me I had pretty hair. That kind of makes me feel better in a strange way, but prehaps its just the sugar rush. |
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I love you because you sent me some awsome friggin music, and some NZ candy, and a whole load of stuff... (Which I might add, as soon as I get my computer I'm going to compile a list of songs, burn a CD get a whole skew of Montaninana stuff and ship it out. Sorry for the delay but the move kinda put things to a screeching halt in my life.) |
heh no, thats cool. I can wait. Later on in the year I may have to make KiwiMix2 and you'll be on the list to get one Hal. Apparently Shihad have been roaming your country, so if they come near you promise to go see them for me and wave at that spunky John (lead singer). |
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sorabji has very much affected my life. perhaps not in a positive way, but it's affected it. |
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started a zine. started reading independent publications. left home in the middle of the night. gotten myself addicted to smints. amoung other things. |
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Tee hee! |
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i just discovered peach the other day. yum. |
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Pez I got it all on thursday, but my computer died so I couldnt do the many thanks email, Loved the zine! and loved that weird candy... took the green apple thingys to work, and they went down good. drew got mad cause i ate all the grape ones YUM! and I especially like my new nose! |
nothing like fruitheads. |
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Send me your address... |
all my emails to you keep bouncing back dammit, so buggerit, i'm just going to go wild, and post you whatever comes to hand.... |