Such a holiday is upon us. Bombs, burgers and Black Cats and a fire coming to a forest near you soon. Im positive some dumbass wants to reign CA supreme...my fire is bigger than yours so take THAT Colorado, and Arizona. It won't be me. Im going camping at Lake Cachuma but first a stop will be made to "Zambodia"....this being the third annual get together at a place close to here camping at Russell's house. Here the fireworks will be viewed on a dark beach. Where will you be American? What will you be burning in celebration of this country's independence? |
to take the 5th off instead of the 4th. so what. No 4th will ever match the one when i was 4. The Bicentennial with the boat parade, all sorts of humongous Lake Superior ore carriers all decked out with lights and fireworks going off over head. It's my earliest clear memory. I want to see a boat parade again. |
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I'm thinking of getting some buffalo meat to grill on our balcony. Has anyone ever had buffalo? It's something I would try from someone else's plate but I'm leery of getting a large amount for myself flavor untasted. I had alligator at a Creole restaurant a few weeks ago. It had a nice flavor (and it was seasoned, of course) and the texture was interesting. Not as fibrous/stringy as poultry, and not as chewy as beef. Mountain lion is supposed to taste very good (from the things I've read) but bear is supposedly gross. My uncle has had bear and confirms this. |
In California i have wild bear/mtn lion fantasies. The first time i really went out in the wilderness i had been here for 3 months, i was unemployed but i had some dope. The wife was at work and a bloke said "Lets go to Pinos". Wtf. We drive an hour outside of town, off the freeway, up a small mountian road to about 7000 feet elev. Im convinced im going to be mauled by a mountain lion. Im convinced they run ramapant just in off the road, into the bush. We come to this parking lot, and hike about another mile to this The whole time i carried a rock in my hand and sorted out ways to fend off an attack from a mtn lion that i was sure was tracking us....waiting till we reached the crest of the mtn. Now, this weekend, when we go camping, im convinced im going to wake up and a bear is going to be sniffing around our tent. The wilderness just seems so much more 'wild' here than it does in Appalachia or in the Southern pine forests. Its steep, with jagged rocks, pointy furs and pines. Its almost scary. |
I've also read that if you encounter a mountain lion, you should make yourself look as big as possible (hold open your jacket, etc.) and make loud, low-pitched noises (but no high-pitched screams). Just so you know. |
i have a feeling at that point id already be in the clutches of their massive jaws and ripped by their razor-sharp claws. |
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things like "don't fall down" and "strike it repeatedly in the head". yeah, right. they should probably also advise people to avoid stepping on their own bowels when they're all piled up around their ankles. |
a mountain lion is the opposite. you should try to scare it off. if it attacks you, fight for your life: if you play dead it will drag you somewhere and you will be dead. |
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A year ago I was on the beach in Florida. Two years ago I was moving into the Ozark foothills cabin after spending some of June in Aruba. Three years ago I sat in my Sunset Hills backyard and watched fireworks over the Arch downtown, and four years ago I watched contrails overhead from a campfire a hour west of here. Five years ago I was in Aruba. Six Years ago, hell, I dunno. But twelve years ago in 1990 I set off my last fireworks. Remember children, hold the burning end Away from you. |
Mountain lions (and bears) DON'T LIKE PEOPLE! They will be as unhappy to see as you will be to see them. Sheesh. |
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bears will go out of their way to destroy you if you're stinking the crimson flow. |
Yes, hold the burning end of the child away from you. See Burningman.com for details. |
and they will stalk humans. especially short humans. or joggers. |
there is also a weimeraner named delores. i love her. |
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spider, i ate buffalo meat often when i lived in montana. good stuff, i highly recommend it. i bought deer meat the other day. i froze it. maybe i'll make shishkebobs this weekend. i just went for a 90 min bike ride on the hike and bike trail. then i'm going out to lake travis. tonight they symphony is playing a free concert by town lake, which i might try to go to. maybe i'll bring my hoops. mmm maybe not. holidays here are lonely affairs. at least there's sangria! |
i'm trying to make plans to go to the zine symposium. money is a little tight, but i'm having a yard sale this weekend, so maybe i can swing it. sarah, what happened to the party? |
Teriyaki. It were good. |
i'm the monkey. |
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there were a lot of people at the party. the ones with whom i've been aquainted were all folks from kickball. kickball isn't being played in the summer since most folks have scattered. i talked to two guys (one a painter, one an MBA student) from Peru. another guy from kickball who told me he is 32 years old and recently divorced after being married 8.5 years. he invited me to come to his improv comedy show at The Hideout tomorrow night. R showed me his chickens. he has six of them in a humongous coop in his backyard; they all have spanish names which i can't recall now except Dora, which was short for some spanish word that means "golden". he liked the cake and was sorry later that he forgot to take a picture of it. everyone liked the cake, it was a big hit, as were the fresh figs that someone else brought. they were cut in half laying on a plate surrounding a round of soft cheese. i think they were supposed to be garnish, but i ate them. i never had fresh figs before. they taste nothing at all like dried figs, which i also like a lot. also there was lots of beer. there were A LOT of people there. like at least 100 or so came and went throughout the night - all different ages, races, sizes, shapes, and sexual orientations. i hit on some girl before i realized her girlfriend was there too. whooops, oh well. beteween R and his housemate Eva, they know like half the city of austin. Eva has a reputation for being perfect - 23 years old, runs her own nonprofit do-gooder business, a triathelete, dedicated girlfriend, beautiful, way above average smart, and an artist. i hate her. i had a nice time overall. i have a real hard time connecting with people here. everyone is very polite and small talky. also, there seems to be some sort of aesthetic i'd call "glamorous alienation". in any case, at least it was good to get out of the house. p.s. i was reading your website and that email from darren makes me want to move to paris. i wonder if not knowing french would matter? |
especially if you eat too many of them and don't drink water. but fresh figs in general (especially right off the tree) are great. |
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truly. you'll find your way. 4ths are always a bang. Wed night there was a party. a big one. parties at this place always turns out to be a boon. no different. enter same patrick spiel of hundreds of people, coke being laid in front of me and the wife makin out with some girl. blah blah blah. even im getting tired of it. the best part was being under the ghetto birds squaking halogen. Don't those dumbasses realize that when they try and communicate from the chopper, it sounds like the teachers in Peanuts? The cops we're actually very cool. Most of them were my age or younger, I suppose the rookies get the bitch holiday duty. There were indeed just too many people in this house adn we were glad to have them cleared out. Flash Express was shut down after 5 songs. Last time it was 2 sets, and the time before that 3 bands before being shut down. The address is becoming more and more prevalent in their black and blue database. Even one of the cops said he had been to a party at that house before. Coke makes me do dangerous things. Really. Im going to be a daddy soon if I don't cut it out. But i think Im more angry about that other woman at the party than Im letting on. Enough about that. Im secretly getting tired of it. But thats not whats memorable of this 4th of July. On to Russells in Goleta. My head is splitting logs at 10 am. Just 4 hours sleep. We always end up at Russells hung over. Even though it was overcast...the beach never seemed more beautiful. We had to move our camp twice due to the rising tides. Mushrooms wiped my hangover out and we put corn in the fire so juicy it practically gave me a facial. This is what the fourth is about i think. Sitting around a fire, thinking your tent is going to be a cozy little love den, your ass tickling in the lawn chair from a mild dose of hallucinagens. A stump so big in the fire it takes on the form of a woman's haunches...we called it the 'erotic stump' and proceeded to burn bottles in its flaming womb. Crazytalk no TV firetime. No, really, there were peeps there sober for whom this shape took on. We burned glass all night like some sorta of cosmic artisians...whatever, assfucking the erotic stump. Its womb burned until 7 am Im told by Russell who was up to tend to fields. The tent is never as comfortable as you imagine it to be and you never sleep in. We balked at Lake Cachuma. Last night was the first night without a drink in way too long im embarrassed to say. Somethings have to change. Im too tired to detail and you're too bored to care. But I had a nice fourth though. Our tradition steadily digging its feet in. |
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i didn't want to cheat by googling "deviled figs", because i just kinda made that up in my head yesterday, and today it occurred to me that i could probably actually make deviled figs. but i wanted to see what i could come up with on my own. so how does this sound? halve the figs lengthwise, scoop out the love and put it in a bowl. then using a little heat, soften up some goat cheese. not chevre. the softer, fattier goat cheese. very finely chop up some of my garden mint. add a splash of tawny port? no. white wine? a pinch of salt. mix it all up, and spoon back into the figs. now taking comments or suggestions. but don't cheat and google it. |
figs and mascarpone. |
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mascarpone would have been far better. i made them last night as described (minus white wine) and they tasted undelicious, weird. lost between sweet and savory. next attempt: mascarpone, honey. that's all. currently resting in the fridge are chopped figs with lemon juice and sugar, for preserves. |
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I'm waiting for the ripest tomatoes to make tomato ginger jam with. In November I'll make cranberry chutney. Need to start another batch of limoncello, as last years' was finished. I want to have a dinner party of delicious handmade Italianesque foods: hand-cranked linguine with sage, salata caprese and pounded (not processed) pesto. Though for my own sanity, I'd have to keep it small. And now I'll need to finally get over my fear of piecrust. New beau loves pie and volunteered his fancy rolling pin. I found a glass pie plate in one of the dumpsters at Reed. |
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pie crust tips use butter flavored crisco and put it in the freezer for 15 minutes beforehand. use lots and lots and lots of flour when rolling it out. and Dougie, that sounds divine! i wonder when the next time will be that you and your wife enjoy dinner at one of your favorite restaurants? hah. sorry. that's newborn humor. |
Use a pastry cutter. Keep things cold. Use more water than they say if you need to. The best part is that you should practice. A lot. You could come do that at my house if you want. |
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thread. |
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want to trade fig preserves for limoncello? maybe an uneven trade. i could throw in a local beer and/or vegan chocolate. hi dan. |
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jars with the thingamagig lever top sealer thingie? what about using a plain ol' piece of rubbermaid? i'll just send you fig preserves anyway. i can't even keep up with the figs this year. The birds get about 20% of the bounty even if i'm out there picking at sunrise. right now figs are on the stovetop simmering in a tawny port. |
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*sigh* My domestic skills and urges are totally wasted on this life. |
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my sister and i regularly send each other small batch vodka whenever we come across some. it's become a family ritual. but um, we send it in usps flat rate boxes and package it up ourselves and use the self serve machine at the post office. it may be illegal, i really don't know or care. but i have yet to caught or penalized in any way. |
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oh and have it on good authority that a great vegan alternative to crisco for pie crusts is coconut butter. not milk, not oil, coconut *butter*. it comes in a jar. i've not used it myself for pie crusts so i cannot testify. if i were to use it, i'd measure out the amount needed, then put it in the freezer for 15 minutes beforehand. |
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due to motherfucking useless heightened security, i cannot use the self service machine at the usps to post anything weighing in excess if 13 motherfucking ounces. motherfuckgodamnshitforbrainsassponies |
I had trouble trying to sent some stuff for ebay. |
from a post on the Daily Beast.... ""We learned the other day that Michelle likes to lounge on the beach reading up on Austrian Economics between passages of the Old Testament. Color me frightened. "" remember this : Sept 11 was never determined by NATO to fall under Article 5 of the Washington Treaty, primarily because no one can dispute that GWB was not intimately involved, perhaps, just sayin. Bachmann makes Romney look like a liberal. and this: "those who would have security over liberty (freedom) will end up having neither" (to paraphrase the lecherous old fuckwit Ben Franklin) Hope everyone enjoys fathers' day. I hear there's going to be a cyberattack over fourth of July, from an Australian hacker who will be in Boston that previous week. Anybody else speculating? |
Plans for this fourth? I will be in Washington DC Saturday night and safely back surrounded by guns and barbed wire in the Ozark foothills by Sunday for the holiday. I wonder if the computer glitch at United airlines had anything to do with a dry run of the cyberattack? And I am flying...you guessed it, United back from Washington.I think things are about to get a lot crazier. Hunker down folks. What you gonna burn this year Patrick? |
Sarah, I'm so jealous you just have figs growing in your yard. What I wouldn't give for any fruit bearing trees, particularly figs and cherries. |
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i have some 15 jars of fig preserves sitting on my kitchen counter. if your address is on the sorabji address spreadsheet, you'll likely be receiving some. except mark, but only because i don't think he cares about fig preserves. contents include 80% fresh organically grown figs, 5% fresh organically grown strawberries (just cuz i had some that needed to get used up), 10% organically grown sugar, 5% tawny port. something like that. |
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heather, how about trading for some pottery? making pottery is kinda domestic-ish. |
I'll be making some limoncello soon, though after this week is over. I'll keep y'all updated. |
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it was created for anything goes exchange. but it looks like it has been heavily edited since then. |
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