is it just me or do you see any resemblance between this and this guy on the left?

It's not just you.

thanks sem. i was starting to get sad for a minute.

why is it that the french are the only european culture who gives americans a hard time even when they TRY to speak the language? funny that they OWE us from as far back as the revolution and we have never demanded payment. funny that when we needed to bomb lybia they said, "not over OUR airspace". maybe we shouldn't have liberated them in wwii. i'm sure they could have defeated hitler on their own!

i have a friend in paris right now who could just go on and on and on. actually, he does.

joe the french are objecting to the current Iraq matter in the UN because they have considerable business interests in Iraq. So does Russia. Their concern is primarily economic under theguise of civility and humanity. be assured we'd being doing the same thing if France wanted to attack....say....Japan. The business interest dictate polictical policy to an extent i think. While it makes them seem like arrogant, contemptuous ass monkeys, its really no different than how our actions, as a nation, politically and militarily present us as gun-toting, trigger-happy, imperialists. but since im not french, i will subscribe to the contemptuous ass monkey p.o.v. and invite them, as a nation, to suck it.

yeah, you're right, patrick. it seems to come down to the same thing no matter how we try to dress it up. we need to figure out how we can all get along as a planet. that's the only way we will survive.

and dave, your friend's web site is very impressive, as are so many web sites these days. i would challenge him to use his talents to make a real difference instead of wasting them on a site as complex as he has created.

i would challege you, to use your talents of influence and tact (hmm...?) to make a real difference instead of wasting them on people as complex as we that, or to stop being an annoying fuckwit

That in itself would be a real difference.

Now this has to be the most frightening cat I have ever seen. Joe, you should heed heather's last bit of advice. or just shut the fuck up

hey its Fluffah!!

I have to ask....does that cat's personality match its face?

heh. pretty much. he's an evil entity. i didn't know that picture was on there! joe, i shudder to think of what would occur should you and the creator of gogohobo ever meet, either face to face or in writing.

He looks like a cross between Chucky the doll and Hank the angry dwarf with fur.

he does kind of look like chucky. what really sucks is when you are just waking up in the morning, you open your eyes, and fluffah sneezes all over you. brrrrr.

He looks like the feline version of cujo

die it green and take pictures of it poking its head out of a kitty-sized garbage can. send them to sesame street and call a lawyer.

oh,...i don't know. why don't you just stick to the topic? people as complex as all of you should have something more to say about the french instead of trying to come up with the best goof on me.

we don't stick to the topic around here. it's our trademark. better yet, put fluffah in a snugli and let some guy i know carry him around the pike place market...

Hey, Joe, quit yo' whinin' an' listen to Agatha. You done picked on the biggest bully on the playground an' got yo' nose bloodied. Boo-hoo! What that got to do with fucking the Freyunch? What THAT got to do with the topic? Besides, I hear you shot your woman down and that ain't cool!

Like in " Hey Joe" ?

yeah, you're right. the biggest bully did respond to my post. is my nose bloodied? hardly. i just want to rag on the french.

Rag on the French, then hit the rest of Europe: http://exile.ru/151/materials/europeans-chart.html -- handy chart here!

Joe, can you clarify? What could dave.'s Friend do to make a "real difference"? This is a serious question. I am curious about the fact that you seem to think people are "wasting" their time, left and right. Don't you think you should be doing something really important right now, instead of wasting your efforts ragging on the french?

"French" rhymes with "Stench". Coincidence? I think not...

oh, c'mon gee, nothing is really serious here in sorabjiville, right? 'I am curious about the fact that you seem to think people are "wasting" their time, left and right.' wow,...that's a SERIOUS accusation (left and right, on top of it). please provide the list of people (you did use the plural) whom i have accused of wasting their time. look, the french hate us. france is the one european country that does NOT appreciate ANYONE (not just americans) who attempts to speak their language. they love to correct even the slightest mis-pronounciation. FUCK THEM. it's ok that we liberated them from the nazi's, it's ok that they loved us during the revolution because we were fighting their greatest enemy, but we can't fly over their air space when bombing lybia for terrorist activity. i guess they think this will make them the "nice guys" of the world. this makes their country the pussy of the world. this is the topic i wanted to discuss.

Joe, since you are so keen on proof when others make generalizations about you, would you please provide the list of people who love to correct even the slightest mis-pronouniation. Thank you. p.s. I saw Yvette Roudy speak yesterday. She kicks ass.

Short dark and dirty! Short dark and dirty! Also BAD BEER!

have you been to France Joe? I have. And I can say the French are delighted and appreciative to those who make an attempt to speak their language. Its annoying dopes, such as you present yourself, who get under the skin of the french with your gross assumptions and blanket generalizations. regardless of WHY the french have opposed USA's unilateralism and imperialism towards Iraq, thank god they are. The resolution regarding weapons of mass destruction and war with Iraq is a dangerous ticket. Thank GOD somebody is standing up to the war pigs at the white house. At least its putting a delay on making the world more dangerous.

I found that the people in Paris were by far, nicer than the people in Boston.

Boston is a mean city. Heh. Wouldnt it be funny, in the middle of January, in Boston, spunk and i are sitting on the porch Patrick: "I'll trade you a beer to fetch 'my' lawn chair thats sitting on the street, near the curb, in front of my hockey player/part-time taxi driver neighbor's house. Spunk: "DEAL!" You'd see some "Bostonian cheer" when my neighbor came home from a 10 hour shift to see his chair gone and a station wagon parked in its place.

especially if his name is...Sully

Dave Atell's Insomniac awas in Boston last night. It was funny.

Shut the fuck up, Patrick. (God, that felt good...everyone should give it a try.) Joe, you're absolutely right...fuck the French.

hey "feel good" at your own expense asshole.

Y'all fuck off. I live in Paris, so I think I will speak with some authority on the subject. Parisians are NOT "delighted and appreciative to those who make an attempt to speak their language". Bull fucking shit, Mr. Vacationer. Having lived here and having polled Parisians, I can tell you that not only do Parisians hate foreigners trying to speak their holy tongue, they also hate non-Parisian French people coming into town and speaking *native* (but non-Parisian) French. So hang your fucking pollyannaish altruism at your own door and, when you step outside, experience the harsh, cold reality of the French who hate *you*, right where you are sitting now, and stop your fucking preaching to those of us who know first hand. Also, Joe, boo fucking hoo about flying over French airspace to bomb Libia. If they wanted to fly over *my* airspace to bomb *you* the French would accede, so fuck off.

"You'd see some "Bostonian cheer" when my neighbor came home from a 10 hour shift to see his chair gone and a station wagon parked in its place." Um, no deal. And I do not drive a station wagon. I drive an Acura Legend, complete with a throaty V6 24 Valve engine, cd player and sunroof, and it gets about 15 mpg, thank you very much! Et "vont le séjour à enfer" la baise hors de l'Amérique si vous nous détestez tellement. Nous serons sûrs de renvoyer la faveur. Ah, et nous veillerons à détruire tous les papiers que nous avons imprimé pour vous dans votre tounge indigène pour faire à la vie plus faciles sur vous quand vous visitez ici, pour pour ne pas offenser votre non-se baigner, non rasant l'âne.

my post had nothing to do with you dumbass.

When I saw this, it thought it was? "Wouldnt it be funny, in the middle of January, in Boston, spunk and i are sitting on the porch" Or do you just enjoy fantasizing about me getting the shit kicked out of me?

oh. "contour fch" is you? i dont keep up with your alternate names. well then, let me readdress. it doesnt matter if you drive a station wagon. i wasnt a story seeking factual accuracy. nor do fantasize about you in any way. i had a fleeting thought, of you as my Norton, my Scratchy, my Curly so to speak. I just used you as the village idiot for a moment. Really. Just relax, it was in jest. God damn.

contour fâché is the closest to pissed trace i could come to en français (litteraly angry outline).

did you buy my acura, trace? is it red?

no, it is goldish brown (?). I am looking for another, this one is getting elderly. Like me.

i had 220K miles on mine when i left it.

damn, this one is only up to 162k, but I think it is ready for a new tranny and an overhaul.

why continue to buy half ass used cars? why not buy a certified used car with warranty and such as not to keep doing the car buying shuffle?

Les Français aiment les penser sont une culture tout l'essai de cultures à assortir. Ce n'est pas vrai. Cependant, il y a de bonnes choses en France aussi. Même une partie du peuple. So, just take it easy cher ami!

beacause i have found that a used car (have not tried certified yet) if you buy a used car that is new enough to cost enough to have to make payments, and full coverage insurance, then you are paying that plus repairs. or buy an older used car (i looked for a long time before I picked this one out, but I guess not long enough) and do the repairs as we go along...

Ce fait n'est pas un que je doute. Justes comme non tout l'Américain sont les garçons de vache. Nous ne sommes pas des overs de poussée non plus.

that makes no sense to me. new cars have little to no repair bills other than standard maintainence. my honda has only had 2 repair issues. one was a gas tank that was punctured due to debris in the road. the other was recently, i had a leak in my trans axle or something like that. otherwise its been reliable as fuck. this car is hitting 70k and 6+ years old. older used cars have reliability/worry issues. im pretty sure when we can get around to getting a new car, though the fact the mrs is getting a company car may stall that initive, we will go with certified used. that seems to counter the automatic depreciation a car aquires the minute one drives off the lot. there are warranties with certified used and considering there can be few miles on a certified used car, you are almost assured there will be no surprises. when you buy a hunker old used car, you never know. automobile worry is something i pay not to have.

that last line makes a lot of sense. Seriously.

two things i know. 1) my 1998 dodge intrepid es has 136k miles on it and is still running great. 2) a friend of mine who was married to a doctor and spent a year in france while he studied medicine and she studied music was confronted constantly by folks who would correct her pronounciation of "un" if it sounded even remotely like "en", "in" or "on". both of them felt that they were fluent in french and were maklng an effort to speak the language properly. no, i've never been there, but my friends weren't making this up. so, i have an opinion based in fact.

I'm still trying to figure out why Trace and Patrick would be sitting out on a porch in Boston in JANUARY.

because they enjoy the cold?

Joe, RE: A list Well, aside from "dave.s friend", there was also Mark. Do two people count as a list? I think, considering the short period of time that has passed since you accused Mark of wasting his time, that yes indeedy two people do count as "right and left". Will you answer my question, now? What could dave.s friend do to make a "real difference"?

*Paris, 1997* scene: wisper walks out of a cafe, with an unlit cigarette. Young man approaches on motor scooter. wisper- 'excuse monsier, j'mexcuse, avez-tu une...une....lighter?' (wisper doesn't know the word for lighter, and can't remember the word for fire, and asking for a candle seems stupid.) (wisper moves her thumb up and down, as the international symbol for 'lighter') (he laughs) young man- 'allumeur?' (she takes his lighter) wisper- 'oui! oui! yes, i guess. I'm sorry, i forgot the word. Merci' young man- 'tu est canadien?' wisper- '...oui?' (the young man leans over, and whispers in her ear) young man- 'don't worry, we ALL speak english here, we just don't tell anyone!' (he makes the 'shhhhh!' motion with this hand and drives away) ----- the french are brutally honest. They don't bullshit politeness like here. It's refreshing, but intense. Now, people from Quebec, they're just fucking insane.

briquette (sp) pronounced br[we]ckette I remember it, as that was in my list of 10 words not to forget.

Hé, wisper! Va te faire foutre et vos expériences de touristes! La réalité de Th est que 1 dans 10 ici peut lire un journal français, parlent encore moins n'importe quelle autre langue! La majeure partie du peuple ici ne pourrait pas donner la merde si vous avez voulu allumer une cigarette ou allumer votre gros âne blanc sur le feu -- elles diraient juste n'importe quoi vous fermer! Maintenant, si vous voulez un traitement plus approximatif, venez à Paris et essayez votre stupidité une fois de plus dans l'âge commun et nous vous nourrirons votre âne avec de la sauce bonne de la laquelle vous mangerez parce que vous êtes stupide. Va te faire foutre!

Actually, why don't you go fuck yourself while you're at it you extraordinary Parisian dumbass. I lived in Paris for 7 months, and I found people who were more than happy to help me with my French; I found people who forced the conversation to English because they wanted to practice their English -- and most of those people's English was just as bad as my French; and I also found surly assholes like yourself which one finds anywhere in the world. They're the ones who can aller se faire foutre. I also spent a lot of time in Strasbourg, which I'm sure you'll turn your nose up at as a backwards toilet of a city since it's not Paris, but the people there were great. En bref, manges-moi.

Tell 'em Dougie! I have found French whores who are willing to screw me in English in any among the various streets of Paris and found them very accomodating as you have, no doubt. Can you tell me, was the English they practiced on you "120 Francs for blowjob; 240 for full fucking"? Did that include the champagne brunch? You stupid, half-wit, stink-dog, hand-to-mouth, low-life, ignorant son of an afterbirth shithead, stinknose, buttface, bullet-riddled corpse of a dickhead!

right on cocksucker! LETS KEEP IT ROLLING PEOPLE!

c'est degolace. gee, i'm sure you can think of something.

Go away or I shall taunt you a second time!

Yeah, I was walking by Parc Monceau one day and your mother, sister, and girlfriend were giving a package deal for a pack of Gauloises and a day old croissant. I would've gone for it had they had some resemblance to human beings. I suggested they frequent the zoo wbere they could perform their trade on the poor lonely animals in return for some feed and a warm cage to sleep in. Last I heard, they were a real hit in the great ape house. Sadly, your mother was mauled to death and is now being used as Koko's rag doll. Even weeks after death and rigor mortis, with all her broken appendages, she still flops around nicely, although that one cyclops eye of hers hanging on by a thread is fairly disturbing, but Koko doesn't seem to mind. He amuses himself hours on end by swatting at it and watching it swing back and forth. It's nice that your family is finally giving something back to the animal kingdom.

ouch! that's our Dougie.

hey, step off koko.

Thanks Gee. Just telling it like it is, agatha. Hmm, I wonder where Monsieur Parisien Extraordinaire is? Probably out kicking around construction sites looking for a nice rock to use for his poor maman's headstone at Potter's Field de Paris.

uhhhh hmmm ermm.. suck an egg you smelly frenchy....... oui? it was suggested to nico while in france next week, while donning her professional attire, sport a little frog pin on her blazer and perhaps a mini american flag. that'll really sock it to em YEAH!

heh. i think i know our french friend. if so, he's just baiting for fun. he's kinda like that. of course, i don't speak french, so i don't know what he's even saying, but i'm assuming it's not polite.

hey Parisian IS THAT ASS SERVED AVEC BEARNAISE OR AU VIN! suck it frenchy!

Well, I can see that you all have a great deal to learn about being bitter, intolerant and hate-filled... To wit: This thread/topic is called "Fucking the French" for a reason. If you don't want to fuck or disparage the French (or talk about *cars* at least), I would suggest you start your own thread/topic. I have some suggested titles for you. How about, "Paris is for *Lovers*"? Or perhaps you fancy "Up with People"? If not that than surely you will find "Hooray for Everything" more suitable. And, Doogie...listen... Your little fantasy about gorillas and people's female family members probably plays out pretty well in your tiny little imagination and, had I not read a similar account elsewhere previously, I would give you a "C" (for cunt) on your efforts. As is, I say: Doogie, I don't know how to tell you this, but... I yelled at your mom not to bark and the fucking rabid bitch BIT me! So, we had to put her down. Please send me your address so I can send you a bill for the bullet, the garbage bag, and the Parisian lackey we paid to bury her. And now, a word from our sponsors...

Well I can see that you have a great deal to learn about posting on these boards...

...but maybe not as much as some

you are basketball fan have you ever seen how they play basketball in Holland? they use something they call a "kane and raquet" method never heard of it? no, they bring the sow out fter the game its not like american basketball in american basketball they eat the sow during the game

hey dzilla, why don't you translate your silly "insult" posted under "Parisian Extraordinare" for the benefit of those who don't live with someone who speaks fluent french. Also, answer my question cockmouth. Bearnaise or au vin!

In my country, a man who speaks words such as "cockmouth" is considered have experience with such matters.

oh oh,...big challenges!!

Cause toujours tu m'interesse Dzilla. *YAWN* It might've been fun had you come back with something original, and not just a reworked version of my post. Oh, and show me a link where you "had...read a similar account elsewhere previously" you french fuckstain.

Bad enough to be a fuckstain,but if it's french it's a stinking fuckstain.

All Hail J!

You know it, J! I betcha Monsieur Frenchy's probably bidet'ing himself after a rough evening.

so, has something changed and we're now defending the french? i feel like i'm in a p.k. dick novel where everything's changed but i can't quite figure out how. i just know that i'm the only one who has noticed.

the answer is in your cupboard.

perhaps the answer is posting a response to a challenge rather than a ridicule of the challenger.

I have a Peugot.......can I play,too?

monsieur dave. who defended the french? i think the challenger makes a fine target. i still wish the prick would translate his post directed at wisper about eating out of asses for everyone to read.

according to babelfish: "Hé, wisper! Get stuffed and your experiments of tourists! The Th reality is that 1 in 10 here can read a French newspaper, speak even less any other language! The major part of the people here could not give the shit if you wanted to light a cigarette or to light your large white ass on fire -- they would say just anything to close you! Now, if you want a treatment more approximate, come to Paris and once more test your stupidity in the common age and we will nourish you your ass with good sauce of which you will eat because you are stupid. Get stuffed! "

when nico read it, i asked her if it was accurate or a babelfish translation. she said it was either a babel fish translation (i.e. sucky) or really slangy french. either way, it was diffcult to read and pretty much sounded stupid.

I kinda like the "nourish your ass with good sauce" part..........

I liked "of which you will eat." That's making me chuckle. God, I hate that word.

BEARNAISE OR AU VIN???

Oh yeah,and just what kind of a nut goes around "polling" his fellow Parisians about how they feel about visitors trying to speak french? Are you a Professional French Poll Taker? What are your polling qualifications? I demand a recount of the ballots. Somethings fishy in Denmark.

oh shit sem, i'm going to die laughing here. babelfish is such a fun toy, so flawed. You know, maybe i WILL go back to Paris soon, so that they CAN nourish my ass with good sauce. i can't even type it, i'm going to fall over. really, the cat's looking at me funny, i'm crying and giggling. what was that originally supposed to mean?! ahahahahaaaaaa!!! "Get stuffed!" fuck me, it's too funny. but that's what i get for testing my stupidity in the common age ... !!! i feel like someone just set me up the bomb! *wisper rolls onto the floor*

one more example of why the French can suck my dick: a report from Chambery France: "fucking idiot sales manager.....the chauvinist guy. since he lives in the city just a couple blocks from my hotel, nicholas the trainer asks him to pick me up in the morning. since the chauvinist doesn't want to stop the car in front of the hotel, i have to stand outside the hotel in the rain (this morning for 20 minutes). just now he was supposed to bring me back to the hotel, which by the way he usually drops me off about 5 blocks away and i walk to the hotel in the rain, but tonight i just saw him run out. another guy here stops by and tells me that he doesn't mind to drop me off tonight since the chauvinist had to run. the chauvinist idiot didn't even stop to tell me he wasn't taking me home. un-fucking-believeable. it especially angers me in the mornings when i have to wait outside. since i'm quite different here, for work, i'm always on time. when nicholas asked him to pick me up in the mornings, apparently this idiot said OK but she should be waiting outside (which i think is unbelievably rude, to ask a guest, a woman, especially a pregnant woman). anyway it's no big deal. don't have to like everyone." F U C K THE FRENCH

What a fucking asshole that creep is,Nico shouldn't have to put up with that,she should make other driving arrangements,she should tell Nicholas the trainer that it's just not working out.

well the guy appears to be the boss of everyone...so, its best left alone. she'll be home soon and wont have to deal with him directly.

So in the meantime we should figure out how to fuck that bastard several months after Nico is home,is he married?

i remember hearing a news story about women trying to get elected to some local political office that is pervasive in france and dominated by men. i admit that i don't remember the details, but i do remember that the response of the men was, "listen, the vaginas are talking". right, this is a culture we should respect. sorry, i think they're assholes.

"right, this is a culture we should respect" you've, like, so missed the point joe.

it seemed to me that the point was that the men were making fun of the women,...plain and simple.

I am English and I have to tell you that the French with all their foibles, are a civilised people, which is more than can be said for Americans.

americans are all gay. not in a sexual way but in a retarded and pathetic way. CANADA PLEASE LET ME IN!

It was two years ago Paul, let it go. See if there were more kiwis here, they would be giggling as much as I am right now. There's an ad on TV for Molenberg bread (and how much kiwi's love it), they try and smuggle it in to the UK, they hide it in a pot in a kitchen, and the last one is a guy bitching, because his american girlfriend burnt some of his Molenberg. She turns to him and says the very first line in a very whiny, 'merican accent. Heh.

Joe never answered my question. bastard. I hate all of Quebec and everyone who spills forth from it's borders.

i agree with Gee. the french are just fine, but Quebec...*shudder*

I was just wondering,when a french person swears do they say pardon my english?

good question. it's well known that we say "pardon my french" because the first swear word was spoken in paris on the the famous street rue de remarque.

J

j,to even see you on line is awesome,so to compose a reply to your rip roaring postings takes me 24 hours to compose,but tell you what,WOW do I give you respect,you can dis-gut most Sorabjis at a stroke,kinda like "Cat-Woman"...I dont tend to dispute on that,,,Cat Woman,you only have one problem,you dont post enough.xxx

droopy,as allway,respect to you.