Wax on, Wax off


sorabji.com: The Stalking Post: Wax on, Wax off
By Karla on Friday, March 17, 2006 - 01:42 pm:

    My husband, son and I are going to the Bahamas for spring break so I went to the salon for my first bikini wax of the season. I usually get waxed during the summer months because it lasts longer than shaving and doesn't leave ugly red bumps and ingrown hairs. For the uninitiated, a bikini wax removes the hair that falls outside the line of the standard bikini bottom. I've had several over the years and though they sting a little, I've never had any problems.
    This time I went to a salon that I've never used before because they open at 9 a.m. and I could still get to work at a reasonable hour. Everything was fine at first, then I noticed that she was moving a little further inward from the bikini line than I am used to. I thought, maybe she's just being thorough and said nothing. Then she starts in on the perineum and surrounding area, waxing and ripping with a vengence in places I didn't even know I had hair, places that will definitely be covered by my bikini bottom. Fearing there was some confusion due our differing languages (most of the salons in this city are operated by Vietnamese) I said, "I want a bikini wax, not a brazilian wax" and she nods and says "yeah, yeah, yeah."
    After a few more minutes of that, I sat up and said "I think that's good enough." She gently pushes me back down and says, "No, No, No. Not finished. Must make it even."
    To make a long story short, the woman freakin' scalped me. All that's left is a skinny strip of hair down the middle. It looks like someone stuck a fake sideburn on my crotch. I certainly won't have to worry about any stray pubes for a while.
    My husband laughed his ass off when he saw it, then he wanted to give it a test run. For the record, it feels as different as it looks. I don't know if I'm more ticked at her for scalping me or at myself for letting it happen. Either way, I'm never going back there again.


By Dougie on Friday, March 17, 2006 - 05:24 pm:

    Sounds like a hairowing experience!


By heather on Friday, March 17, 2006 - 06:52 pm:

    waxing is awesome

    i do it myself and i just learned to make my own sugar-wax


By kazu on Saturday, March 18, 2006 - 02:25 pm:

    how?


By wisper on Saturday, March 18, 2006 - 05:12 pm:

    is it tasty??


By heather on Saturday, March 18, 2006 - 05:18 pm:

    i wasn't sure what you were referring to, so:

    1 cup of sugar
    2T water
    2T lemon juice

    boil to 250

    let it cool to a smooth, sticky, non-skin-burning temperature

    slick on in direction of hair growth
    [occasional contortion required]
    press cloth strip on
    rip off in opposite direction
    [do a very small area if this is new to you or you're working in a sensitive place]


By heather on Saturday, March 18, 2006 - 05:19 pm:

    it is as tasty as sugar and lemon!


By wisper on Saturday, March 18, 2006 - 05:22 pm:

    regarding pubes, i don't understand brazilian wax jobs. I figure it should be all or nothing (and i prefer nothing, though i've never had the nerve to go for a wax). Leaving that little bit at the top looks hilarious. During my old figure drawing classes, 2 or 3 of the female modles would go for that look.
    I always refered to it as "The Hilter".


By heather on Saturday, March 18, 2006 - 07:48 pm:

    yup. all about nothing.


By Karla on Saturday, March 18, 2006 - 11:12 pm:

    When I was a kid, I used to have a long-haired cat that we let outside and she'd get all matted, so every six months or so we'd take her into get shaved. she'd act all embarrased afterward. now I know how she feels. I think I'm gonna try heather's recipe next time.


By Karla on Saturday, March 18, 2006 - 11:12 pm:

    When I was a kid, I used to have a long-haired cat that we let outside and she'd get all matted, so every six months or so we'd take her into get shaved. she'd act all embarrased afterward. now I know how she feels. I think I'm gonna try heather's recipe next time.


By Karla on Saturday, March 18, 2006 - 11:12 pm:

    When I was a kid, I used to have a long-haired cat that we let outside and she'd get all matted, so every six months or so we'd take her into get shaved. she'd act all embarrased afterward. now I know how she feels. I think I'm gonna try heather's recipe next time.


By Karla on Saturday, March 18, 2006 - 11:20 pm:

    sorry about the reptition. my computer's acting funky (and I'm a little buzzed.)