General update from Llama-land


sorabji.com: The Stalking Post: General update from Llama-land
THIS IS A READ-ONLY ARCHIVE FROM THE SORABJI.COM MESSAGE BOARDS (1995-2016).

By semillama on Tuesday, July 13, 2010 - 01:36 pm:

    I realize I don't post much anymore, and it sort of bothers me that I don't.

    So, here's a general update of sorts on goings-on in Llama-land (located in Columbus, Ohio for the last 9 years and counting):

    Went to a family reunion over the Fourth of July. My son was a big hit, but somehow acquired a slight southern accent to his babbling - may have picked it up from my first cousin once removed.

    Ian in general is doing well - not walking or talking, but we think that's probably because he's not feeling the need to, not because he's not capable. He's approached real words like "ball" but won't repeat them after you. He's otherwise a cheerful little boy, except for when he's a cranky little boy.

    Kazu is making steady progress on her dissertation, and may be going up to full time on a temporary basis at her copy-editing job, which will help out on many levels.

    Not too many work adventures lately. Going back to Massachusetts at some point for more fieldwork. We had a lot of office drama earlier in the year when the boss out of the blue hired some consultants to come in and observe our company and suggest ways to improve. unfortunately, the guy they sent was a complete asshole and I don't think that anything really good is going to result from it. On the plus side, not much has changed either since the boss has been too busy to implement much in the way of their recommendations!

    I guess that's about it. How are things with everyone else?


By Hal on Tuesday, July 13, 2010 - 10:01 pm:

    I hurt A LOT...

    I drink TOO MUCH...

    I don't sleep ENOUGH...


By platypus on Wednesday, July 14, 2010 - 09:01 am:

    I vaguely remember a time when I was not busy all
    the time, I think. That was around the same I used
    to socialise with people.

    I haven't seen posting on the boards much lately
    either although I do read and I think it's because
    the busymonster ate me. To think, I used to make
    fun of people who claimed to be 'too busy' all the
    time and now I am one of them.

    Among other things, editing right now for a client
    who is a complete nightmare.


By sarah on Wednesday, July 14, 2010 - 06:30 pm:


    in so many years i've very rarely not had time to visit the boards, to read and/or post.


    it appears that i'm using scrabble to replace the overall waning conversations here that i miss so much. when i post here, it ends up feeling sort of like talking to nobody at all. but in scrabble i'm almost always assured a reply of some sort. it feels more like a real conversation. i tend to blurt out all my life's happenings in 2-player scrabble matches.


    if you have time to play scrabble, you probably have time to type out a coherent sentence as you're taking your turn.


    well, anyway, nice to hear from llamaland. sounds like things are generally cool. td1 didn't talk at all until she was 18 months old, though she understood a lot. it's good you're not worrying about it. we didn't worry too much about it either, since at the time she spent most of her days in a spanish-speaking environment, one of the only caucasian kids in the company of BROWN adults and children - from Cuba, El Salvador, and Mexico. ahem. anyway, she speaks pretty good english now, though by far she is not as articulate as many of her peers.

    it's fun when they start to talk to you for real though. you're like, oh thank god, you can just tell me what it is you want and what you are thinking about!


    update from syrupland


    just got back from a two week kick ass trip to hawaii. took my eldest paddleboarding with me; she loved it. this is HUGE, because she is a shy, fearful child with far too much anxiety for someone her age. td1 also fell head over heels in love with hula dancing. so we're going to try mother-daughter hula lessons starting this evening. if she can persevere through her ongoing difficulty of trying new things, i think it will end up being very theraputic for her.

    oh and last night was her first sleep in her big girl bed. it went surpisingly well.


    td2 is totally opposite. her current nicknames are Chillax and Born To Eat. she was happy to sit on the beach and eat sand, or float around in her floaty.


    seriously toying with the idea of moving back to hawaii, if not forever, just for a couple years til the girls start school.


    more seriously toying with the idea of quitting my job. hard to justify, since i'm mostly working from home, work only 220 days a year, and make a good amount of money. also hard to justify because i've totally run out of the mothering hormone, and have finally started feeling okay about being my own person again, not wanting to spend 24/7 with my kids. not only that, but the mothering work is so much more arduous. does that make me lazy? whatevs.

    easy to justify because family life is falling apart. we pay double our mortgage in child care, and we all have very long days, which end by getting the girls dinner bath bed so that senor and i can eat dinner, part ways to get house stuff/errands done, then flop into bed. maybe quitting my job would help that? don't know. maybe that's just the way it is when you have two very young kids only a year and a half apart, no matter what you do. hard to say.


    came home to an overgrown jungle in my garden, caused by a week of rain here while we were gone. the housesitter got the best of my tomatoes, but the peppers are just ripening, still have tons of chard and kale too. next round of ripe figs also on the way.


    the stalker has disappeared, at least for the time being.


    i had a much needed death-like 3-hour nap today.


    guess that's about it.





By wisper on Wednesday, July 14, 2010 - 07:58 pm:

    divorced



    or rather, the 10-year committed commonlaw
    relationship version of. Really it's all the same
    it just doesn't involve lawyers.

    i haven't been around much here in almost a year.
    Believe me, i know.
    I miss you all and sometimes i needed you, but....
    you know.


By Daniel on Wednesday, July 14, 2010 - 10:09 pm:

    yeah, we are all too busy to respond to a...one another. but you and you and you and you know who you are, I miss each and every one of you when you are not here.

    so long as sentences do not need to be coherent we are okay, me n the goat.

    I glad heather that you tehter not at all and no one. that is good. but can you throw me a rope at times? or an email? coherent sentence writers need not reply.

    Keep yur job kiddo, you need some levity in your life.


By Daniel on Wednesday, July 14, 2010 - 10:14 pm:

    wtf, spellingk aside, it's "tether"

    no llngeer divorced but married over a year now. son is San fran and another in StL and two new subarus.

    my job/program just lost its' funding for the fiscal year so i am looking at converting all my clients (38ofthem) to self pay and watching them cringe.

    back from the gulf, suntanned, too heavy, breathing heavy, and bleeding. it don't get no better.


By platypus on Wednesday, July 14, 2010 - 10:32 pm:

    I'm sorry, wisper.

    Sometimes I creep onto the boards in the dead of
    night and write long things and then don't post
    them.

    I miss everyone.


By sarah on Thursday, July 15, 2010 - 12:05 am:


    me too, wisper. so sorry. hope you're doing okay. guess you got sorabji as part of the settlement?



By agatha on Thursday, July 15, 2010 - 01:31 am:

    Well, what the hell. Sounds like we're all pretty burned out- is this what getting old feels like? I love my job but it's seriously sucking my soul out of me. When I'm not there, I think about it and I spend hours in the middle of the night planning library programs and having anxiety about all of the details of my days. I fantasize about having a boring job again. I am also now on the City's Arts Commission Advisory Board, which means more meetings and more talking and trying to think like a politician and not just say what comes into my brain, which is really hard for me. Today I was interviewed by a reporter writing an article on the future of libraries, and I'm sure I'm going to cringe when I see the article and all of the stupid shit I probably said. Also, my work hours suck- 10-7 Monday through Thursday and alternating Fridays and Saturdays. Waah waah waah. Good things: I am growing a straw bale garden and it seems to be doing pretty well, Cleo is finally growing out of the phase where she hates me and is starting to be a reasonable person more of the time than she's an unreasonable person. I like my friends and my community. I rejoined a letterpress collective that I was a part of a long time ago, and am starting to take some baby steps towards making art again. The weather has been nice here.

    That's all I've got.

    Wisper, I'm sorry. xoxo

    PS- I'm a little worried about Droopy.


By la on Thursday, July 15, 2010 - 02:04 am:

    Funny, checking the boards for the first time in months (years?) and there's a recent update thread.

    I hear things via twitter and facebook every so often, mostly from Agatha or tbone.

    Was fired a year ago, after walking my legs off (funny, a week and a half my workers' comp claim was decided in my favor.......) which got the fire under my butt again to go to school. I'm not quitting this time. Perhaps majoring in environmental science, definitely minoring in dance.

    Still riding a bike, learning how to unicycle and tap dance.
    Still single. My mom's starting to talk about grandchildren but if she's getting them from me it'll be at least ten years. What with school and wanting to join the Peace Corps after.

    I've got an appointment on Tuesday or Wednesday to talk to a counselor about things. I want to lift this weight I always seem to drag around in my chest.

    It's good to hear about the denizens of Sorabji-land, even if bittersweet.

    I'm sorry to hear of the end of wisper's relationship.
    What happened to droopy?


By ... on Thursday, July 15, 2010 - 02:31 pm:

    i got out of a 15-month relationship recently. maybe got out isn't the best way to say it, but it had to end eventually and it's all good. she was 25 when we met, and i was 41. she's been reading and following my web sites since she was a little kid. someone linked her here when she was 12 or 13, but to the best of our combined memories we can not remember communicating in any meaningful way until about 2 years ago. she is a muslim girl, and mostly on account of that we pretty well knew from day one that the reckoning would come. muslim women, it seems, are never free, even in america, and for the duration of our time together her family basically never knew i existed. that didn't bother me so much at first but over time it got depressing. i got sad and even angry when we'd be walking around the neighborhood and suddenly we'd have to change direction, walk the other way, for to avoid being seen by somebody who might report back to her family the they saw her with a white guy. i've never been "the white guy" in a relationship. there were lots of these incidents, and other things as well. in the end she just couldn't maintain the balance, and i let it go without question, though in the back of my mind i can't help thinking that things changed when she started taking the pill. none of that leads to bad feelings, though. she is the only *nice* girl i ever dated, and i think we both brought a lot of good things into each other's lives. the altar is not the only destination in life, and we'll always be friends. in fact, she came and worked for me recently, doing some web site stuff for my so-called business. now she's in the mid-east for a while. it was strange for me, letting someone in to this little world of mine. i've never shown anyone so much of what i do.

    my mother died in december and, as is normal for me, the sadness did not catch up to me for months. perhaps predictably, i've found myself re-evaluating my directions in life. i've cut a few cords and dropped some distractions but i suspect that my inner laziness will draw me back into my routines.

    i am 42 and both my parents are gone. is that early? i don't know. there is no standard but sometimes it seems early to me.

    i do not understand the prestige of becoming old. have you noticed how unbelievably elderly people get a round of applause just at the mention of their age? "meet mabel, she's 102!" (applause). why? i mean, i understand the spirit of the gesture, that of congratulatory kindness, but to me the ritual of applauding the living is equivalent to booing the dead.

    i read that in italy it is a customary sign of respect to applaud when someone dies. i think humanists do the same at funerals. the night my father died, before i knew of either of those customs, i stood alone in my living room and clapped my hands, applauding his life with a "bravo" that i hope he heard.

    anyway, life marches on, i'm keeping busy, and if this sounds like a lot of sad news then it does not reflect how positive i feel about things these days. life is good, and i feel very lucky. it seems like everyone i know has either been fired from a job or expects to be fired. some of these folks have been with their companies for 15 years. one of my friends just got whacked from the job i got him 13 years ago. i have not had a "job" since early '02 but I can't say i miss sucking the corporate cock or reporting to work for someone else. i get lazy though, and i could probably use new challenges. i sometimes wish that greed was among my character flaws, because i could make a lot more money than i do. but i don't care. sometimes i think i should. people do not seem to believe me when i say that the pursuit of money (beyond subsistence) is of no particular interest to me.

    i've been writing a lot of poetry, most of it bad, but once in a while i think i arrive at a decent string of words.

    i often forget that i play the piano, but last week i found a piano on a pier by the east river. it was there as part of a public art installation in which pianos were placed in parks and public spaces all over town. i think it was the first time i played in front of people in about a year (except for when i played for my ex here) and it felt kinda nice. i felt like i was ... communicating.

    i've re-visited my ambition to do radio, buying up some quality audio gear and collecting some hours of pre-recorded material to use either on its own or as background sounds. i also got a DSLR, as much as i have always loathed the DSLR, and i've invested some coin into a variety of other projects, in the spirit of my current philosophy of life, which is that if i am going to bother doing anything i might as well do it right, or at least give myself the best resources to work with.

    i feel boring, rambling like this, but i have to go out into this beautiful day for some outdoor summertime beers with a friend.




By Semillama on Thursday, July 15, 2010 - 03:17 pm:

    I'm sorry to hear about the break-ups. Seems like life is a lot tougher these days for Sorabjites, but then again, look how many of use were young and dumb and seemingly happy. Of course, that was pre-Bush, pre-9/11, pre-recession - an age of Innocence, perhaps?

    Still, I wouldn't trade my experiences in the last ten years for anything.


By Daniel on Thursday, July 15, 2010 - 04:35 pm:

    from 50 to 60 ( I am at 59 1/2 which as beautiful a phrase as "eighteen" is for young fuckers. The last ten years been great great great. I am getting slower but not older. My body is breaking down from the years of neglect. My mind still toys with the idea of a rum and coke, a little hash, and a younger woman.

    acceptance is a path to serenity; resignation only leads to resentment.

    Sorry to hear about the deaths, break ups, dismemberments. I too am worried about Droopy, though I sense he reads us like we read each other in the dead of night and then delete, as was already said, the post so lovingly crafted and easily discarded.

    Some of us have family and kids to occupy play time now. I would like to think that life is no tougher except at the airport. i would like to think that we are tougher.

    I would like to meet each and every one of you before I exit. I've met but one of us, a joyful memory. And Muslim women are never free in the sense that no one of us is free here. How DO we keep going? we take a break from making babies and raising them and make another form of art again.

    You all are so good with the written word; don't stop. You give me air when I can no longer breathe. You give me vodka laced recipes when I can no longer drink. You give me wholesome food for my mind that is isolative and likely degenerate.

    Art. let's raise the banner. And candy. And hope to hold someone's hand, see into another's eyes behind those glasses! and trace the features of a face blocked out of view in pixelated censure. Art.

    He was my uncle, a bettor, a track hound, a rail bird.

    It is said that one's parents are no longer living we children get a chance to grow up. I lost mine early on; it has never been the same. It is so long ago now that I rarely even think of either of them.

    I had to think only and solely of myself for such a long time. I remind myself I have adult children who occasionally need their father for something. This is the one and only reason I refrain from walking westward in the surf at sunset. I am not ready yet.


By la on Thursday, July 15, 2010 - 05:12 pm:

    Speaking of vodka, it's great with cold limeade in the summer. A shot in a jelly jar, filled up with limeade. Drink while gardening.

    A friend of mine died last Friday, the day before her birthday, longboarding on Mt. Seymour in Vancouver. I didn't know her very well, but she was one of those shining stars you can't help but like. I can't go to her funeral even if I had the time to go, damn needing a passport to get in these days.

    I've been feeling the urge to bookbind lately. Anyone want one? I found my instructions for coptic.

    There's so much that helped me grow before and since I left my parents' home, Sorabji-land (those that inhabit) is one of them.


By Antigone on Thursday, July 15, 2010 - 05:41 pm:

    Just got an offer for a new job today. Going to work
    hopefully slightly less mindless and frustrating software
    development at another fortune 500 company for a bit more
    money. Can't complain. I've been trying for the past year to
    have enough energy to work nights on interesting side
    projects, and I think I'm about there. Somewhere along the
    way I lost the ability to concentrate after 8pm, though I still
    can't get to sleep until 2am.

    Ada is almost 3, and is the light of my life. The best part of
    my day is coming home. She's talking up a storm, singing up
    a symphony, and telling stories all of the time. It's all Marci's
    fault. :) She continues to pour more energy than she has into
    taking care of Ada, and for that I am eternally grateful.
    (Though I worry often that she's spending too much of
    herself.)


By moonit on Thursday, July 15, 2010 - 07:33 pm:

    my news is

    I got promoted in December. Its a semi-promotion though, not like a big one, and because of the recession they payrise was laughable to go with it. I've been working crazy hours due to someone resigning and not being able to find a replacement, I'm tired and kind of grumpy and my baby plans are on hold again and I wonder if they will ever happen and its scary to think I never wanted this and now I do... andrew is not keen but I think thats because we are so used to being on our own, yet he treats the dogs with such love and like kids that I know he would be awesome as a daddy...

    I won a trip to tahiti, I leave next week - its for three days. flights and breakfast and two dinners and a lunch are paid for. I got some french pacific francs yesterday and they are weird. I am not good at the money conversion math thing, so this could be interesting...

    We are getting married in NZ on the 26th of March. I have booked so much stuff and on Wednesday found a man who will hire me a slushy machine for frozen margaritas - my only really WANTED thing. I am trying not to do a full on traditional wedding, or be a bridezilla - everyone has a fucking opinion though - I got bagged the other day for wanting to wear bright orange converses with my hopefully 50s style tea length dress. One aunt was horrified that we want hot pink and bright orange as our colours... but hey its my day not hers, my other aunt gave me some money towards my dress and my very very absent father (growing up) has so far chipped in a grand and he wants to pay for catering which is freaking me out (because why now, why not when I was a kid and needed a school uniform or new glasses or you know a DAD)...

    and thats all right now...

    You guys are all amazing, I wish I could meet everyone, I am determined to get to the US eventually - but who knows when. Andrew is talking about a ski trip to canada before the wedding, I said only if he brings home heaps of mini reese's and hershey's kisses so we can use them as favours at the wedding. I'm sure I'm not getting the best deal because he wouldn't come back until a week or so prior... but we'll see.


By sarah on Thursday, July 15, 2010 - 08:48 pm:


    i really, really, honestly was hoping to attend your wedding in vegas. best wishes in any case. andrew's a lucky dude.


    if you sent me an invite, i'd seriously consider attending your wedding in nz. i've already got your gift. word.



    oh, this is so nice. thank you everyone.






By moonit on Friday, July 16, 2010 - 12:49 am:

    heh seriously Sarah if you want an invite you can have one :) I am sure I can even find someone for you to stay with if we've got people crashing with us :)


By Daniel on Friday, July 16, 2010 - 01:32 pm:

    I'd be there Monnie, and not just because I am working with an Aussie firm now long distance over the internet. It is wonderful free to live in your shorts next to the pool and make $150 an hour while the guys at the office wonder "where is he?" and "Why does he not care that the State of Misssouir cut his funding?"

    That's the reason I suppose, and I am not telling them.


By J on Friday, July 16, 2010 - 03:38 pm:

    Well you don't have to shove your arm up a cows ass to know it's beef.


By Antigone on Friday, July 16, 2010 - 08:03 pm:

    But it's so fun!


By TBone on Friday, July 16, 2010 - 09:32 pm:

    I just took part in the firing of my boss. By which I mean for
    the last two hours. I will be taking his position -- a job title
    with the word Director in it. I only found out that this would
    be happening a little over 24 hours ago.

    So, a mixed day. I liked my boss. He didn't take it well.

    I just has some surgery last week to correct a deviated
    septum. Not fun but the drugs are good. Next week I get my
    stomach scoped.

    I'm sure other things have happened prior to last week, but I
    can't think of them right now.


By Daniel on Saturday, July 17, 2010 - 11:22 am:

    hot humid Missouri. Pool anyone?


By sarah on Saturday, July 17, 2010 - 05:01 pm:



    delete delete delete.







By Daniel on Sunday, July 18, 2010 - 04:34 pm:

    delete what friend? Glad your trip was successful. I welcome your move back to the islands because then I would have an excuse to go there..


By J on Tuesday, July 20, 2010 - 02:29 am:

    I have a pool but it is so hot here it's like bath water.I'm sorry about the break-ups,but they say everything happens for a reason,I wish you two great new beginnings.


By heather on Tuesday, July 20, 2010 - 02:31 am:

    i self-medicated with sugar and friends tonight.

    an obvious but not-predicted-because-i-wasn't-thinking-about-it consequence of living my decisions with integrity is more alone-ness to add to the i am an alien pile.

    what i mean is, when i don't play into a dynamic there is yet another place where i don't fit. i am no more alone than anyone else, sitting here just makes it so apparent.

    oneness, what?

    </whine>

    i just noticed this 2010 penny. it is strange.


By J on Tuesday, July 20, 2010 - 02:44 am:

    It.s one of those new coins Heather,you are beautiful to me hon and you are just too high above the common folk.One day your prince will come.It will be all good. Remember I said this.


By Daniel on Tuesday, July 20, 2010 - 04:03 pm:

    pool hot. hot tub hot. air hot. and humid. It has been said that Heather's prince will come along, and J has decreed it.

    that's what i like about this place, the walls and wallpaper so familiar, a fairytale place run by a piano weilding composer of receipt scans and cemetary photographs.

    Don't be glum Heather, the weather will change soon enough. What do you find strange about the penny?


By Dr Pepper on Wednesday, July 21, 2010 - 02:28 am:

    Yes, I have noticed the 2010 penny , the tail section of penny has a new facelift..


By semillama on Wednesday, July 21, 2010 - 02:08 pm:

    I love it when they redesign coins. I think it's neat.

    Can you imagine what it would be like if, like with monarchies, we had to put the face of our current leader on our money?


By Moonit on Wednesday, July 21, 2010 - 03:24 pm:

    All I can say about that Sem is Queenie is looking OLD!


By Dr Pepper on Thursday, July 22, 2010 - 01:52 am:

    Semillama, you not from England?


By patrick on Thursday, July 22, 2010 - 02:42 pm:

    *sigh*

    I want to open up but Im a little scared of that flood.

    i worry that regret will swell as I get older. Regret for decisions I
    made. Such as the one to ever agree to move here. While I love
    my home and enjoy a lot of details, i would gladly trade it for my
    life in SoCal back.

    Though I've gotten remarried, had another lovely child, met
    some great people and had some interesting experiences, i've
    also been put to the brink of cutting my parents off (it was easier
    to blow them off 3000 miles a way), and forced to drag my
    exwife back to court for being nothing more than a resentful,
    angry jackass who refuses to play like an adult and work normal,
    manageable problems out.

    So I'll stop there.

    its nice to hear whats happenign with everyone. Like sem said,
    sometimes it seems like a greener pasture to be dumb, young
    and naive.

    my life is in need of some sort of overhaul, Im just not sure what
    that is yet.

    I wish I had a hot tub and a prize trip to tahiti.


By platypus on Thursday, July 22, 2010 - 07:17 pm:

    Me too, Patrick.

    I am coming to a growing realisation that if I
    want to buy property I can't do it here, in my
    hometown, not even if prices drop because of the
    economy, so I need to go somewhere else, but I
    don't really want to do that. Or maybe I do. I'm
    watching everything I like about this town get
    chewed up and swallowed.

    My friend Andrea is trying to convince me to move
    to Virginia. She's seducing me with ridiculously
    low real estate prices. Seriously, a reasonable
    house. On five acres. For $135k. Meanwhile, the
    only stuff here I could even *afford* is shitholes
    on cramped City lots for way more than that.


By Daniel on Thursday, July 22, 2010 - 11:46 pm:

    3 bedroom two bath on two acres on private country road full basement tuck under two care garage with outbuilding of two car size but without doors, fireplace, ca heat all electric less than 20 years old maintenance free exterior...59,900 Missouri.


By Dr Pepper on Friday, July 23, 2010 - 01:40 am:

    Words of wise: if this is affordable to buy a house? what about the job market in the city or town, where the housing price are affordable? is the area a crime ridden?


By agatha on Friday, July 23, 2010 - 05:05 am:

    Is the area a crime ridden? I'm laughing so much right now!


By Dr Pepper on Friday, July 23, 2010 - 11:09 pm:

    Seriously, in some case, when it comes some small town, and not much of a jobs or workplace. When it comes to a unemployment that is high in a small town, people do tend find something to commit crime such like a meth lab or burglary in order them to makes $$ for their livings. So the question is: is the area where the housing market is cheap due to crime ridden ??


By Daniel on Saturday, July 24, 2010 - 03:24 pm:

    No. Unless you are speaking of Downtown Detroit.

    It's a foreclosure. No crime. But some of my neighbors are sex offenders, meth lab technicians, oil rig roustaboluts, superwomen, and strippers. I have Hitler the puppy mill guy, Bud the 96 yr old snowplower, and Elzona the 86 yr old vineyard tender and interior decorator. (No kidding, I couldn't make this shit up now could I?")

    Pepper does bring up some real issues: crime in the country, police roundups of marijuana growers, and small time meth entrepenuers. Rural amerikan offers quiet unmatched splendor at a bargain price, if you don't mind shoot outs at the ok corrale.

    I think Marco Island florida is a good place to buy too now come to think of it. And the swampland outside Gran Isle Louisiana has some bargains these days.


By Daniel-lost on Saturday, July 24, 2010 - 06:22 pm:

    oh fuck I just looked atan Ek=lkonevada property. Other than desert, it has ts redeeming properties including water.

    Just another Saturday afternoon at the pool without Sarah and heather.

    I'm gonna look for Droopy


By Dr Pepper on Saturday, July 24, 2010 - 08:48 pm:

    Daniel, we have sex offender in our city, and so on. I was else thinking about living in a city that has least, I mean least population like city of 200 or less. I found one in Oklahoma (western) and Brewster county Texas. What do you mean "Superwoman" a lady who think or dress like a superwoman?


By Daniel-lost-lost-lost on Sunday, July 25, 2010 - 11:26 am:

    dresses that way. She's 86, rides her John Deere without the appropriate guards in place, lives on the wild side, and makes a mean pickle. Still rides that tractor terrorizing the neighborhood.

    I live in no-town, just a Googlespot, but still have plenty of felons and sex offenders around. City vs Country?? It's Disney everywhere: the more people in an area, the more crime. Kissimmee Fl found that out. virtually no crime except philandering alligators til Walt moved into town and brought his hoardes of people with his enchanted amusement parks.

    Who wants hoardes of people? THe insecure? The faceless? the whatevers of this world. Republican corporate Anarchi$t$?

    Life is here, without a beach.


By sarah on Monday, July 26, 2010 - 11:26 pm:

    so we came back from hawaii to find our yard blanketed by the beige hollow shells of cicadas. they crunched underfoot, and hung limply from the underside of the leaves of my japanese maple tree, fig tree, and most of the shrubs.

    we found one dead cicada out of its shell, whole, and seemingly preserved. i put it in a plastic baggie and sent it off to preschool with td1 for show and tell.


    everything seems really magical lately. like the weather, we haven't had anything over 95 degrees all summer.

    i woke up at 2:11 a.m. last night to the sound of the moon. it was shining so brightly i could hear it, so i got up out of bed and went out back to look at the sky. so bright i couldn't see a single star.


    while we were on vacation i joined a newly founded women's Sutra study group. we're only on 1.6 but the studies so far have been surprisingly transformative. i've been practicing 4 of the 8 limbs of yoga for... well i don't know... somewhere in the vicinity of 15 years. but studying the Sutras has almost instantly opened my world up to a better state of being.

    like, maybe, i'm going to soon be able to give up the pursuit of moving back to hawaii because it's inconsequential.


    there is so much left to be uncovered.


    in the words of Swami Rama:

    So many thoughts come and you call it the thinking process. There is a space between two thoughts. But if there is no space between two thoughts, then what will happen to time? Time will not exist. If there is only one thought, what will be the condition of space? There will be no space at all. Time and space are variations of the same thing. If there is only one thought in the mind, then time cannot affect the mind. One cannot attain the highest state of samadhi without gaining freedom from the conditionings of the mind. When mind can fathom the boundaries of time, then mind can realize the subtler levels of consciousness and transform itself. Then, it can lead you to a state of peace, happiness, and joy. If mind is free from imagination—I am not talking about creative imagination—and from the memories of the past, then mind can be brought to a state of now. If you learn to train your mind to be here and now, you will know everything. There is nothing to be known beyond that. Now is part of eternity. When a teacher teaches you, first learn how to be here and now, for you have completed the preliminaries. Now, learn to understand the word now.




By Daniel on Tuesday, July 27, 2010 - 11:14 am:

    only the beach, breathing
    only the sail, ruffling
    only one thought in moonrise
    only moon in window
    here, now


By patrick on Tuesday, July 27, 2010 - 01:38 pm:

    platy, we desperately miss culture here. not saying that would be
    your case. then you again, you live in the sticks of nocal, but the
    sticks of nocal have to be more interesting than the sticks of VA.

    Out of curiosity the wife and I put fake craigslist ads for jobs we
    are seeking and the respondents were eye opening. where
    charm and personality opened doors in LA for us, having a 2nd
    or 3rd MBA opens doors here. We can't compete when folks with
    multiple doctorates are vying for 40k/year jobs. The job rate is
    pretty good here relatively speaking but the pool is rich.

    I was very fortunate to land a job in the very trade I've spent
    over a decade in with one of the few publishers here in the area
    that arent a shitball newspaper publisher. The only problem is I
    have a boss who doesnt value my skills, is childish and overall
    threatened by me so my talents are squandered and I'm the
    reason for most of the failures around the office. Seriously, I've
    never contemplated beating my bosses ass, but he is given me
    pause. He is embodiment of douche-dom.

    I'm looking to make a jump to the service industry. I have one of
    my first interviews today as a matter for a fact. If successful, this
    could be a step in the right direction as I can service work
    anywhere.

    We need to get out of here. We're culturally starved, feeling very
    isolated. To do that however will require a fight with Eva's
    mother as she will not negotiate a custody arrangement that has
    Eva with me for either the school year or all holidays and
    summers. She won't do it. So i will have to fight.

    I need to read some shit like that sarah, clear my mind, turn
    down the static and breath a little. but its hard.


By sarah on Wednesday, July 28, 2010 - 12:48 am:


    colbert is going on about The Gap Kids ad for skinny jeans for toddlers. that makes me want to puke.


    patrick, if i can learn to live contentedly in Austin Fucking Texas, certainly you can learn to live contentedly in NC. seems like i know a lot of people lately who live in places where they don't have any sense of connection or belonging. i don't know. i think the key is to just be where you are. comparison is the root of all suffering.



By heather on Wednesday, July 28, 2010 - 01:48 am:

    <3 sarah


By patrick on Wednesday, July 28, 2010 - 12:24 pm:

    i've never been to Austin but Austin seems to have a lot more of
    an interesting culture there. your beer culture for one is stellar,
    but also the music culture. its the headquarters of whole foods
    for god sakes....surely that means something. no?

    do you know how often people Durham still talks about the
    fucking movie Bull Durham?

    aye. i digress.

    i think being extremely tight financially is really turning the
    screws. if we had more opportunities to jet up to nyc or dc or
    savannah for the weekend, we might not feel so disconnected.



    and see heather, when I see that <3 symbol I think of tits? Why is
    that? tits out to sarah?



    Speaking of tits, lil one is starting to release the tata's back to
    dad. thank god. i missed those fuckers. but then again, they are
    part in parcel as to how we got into this whole mess to begin
    with.


By heather on Wednesday, July 28, 2010 - 01:57 pm:

    i think you answered your own question. but sure! tits out to sarah.


By la on Wednesday, July 28, 2010 - 08:57 pm:

    A place being HQ to Whole Foods doesn't mean anything. Whole Foods is the Kroger of organics and has the worst morality in the business (re: monopolies, greenwashing).

    I like tits out to sarah.


By semillama on Wednesday, July 28, 2010 - 10:28 pm:

    i eat babies


By sarah on Thursday, July 29, 2010 - 12:02 am:


    NOM NOM NOM




By Sarah on Thursday, July 29, 2010 - 12:05 am:


    i'm pretty sure i've seen heather's tits.




By sarah on Thursday, July 29, 2010 - 12:18 am:


    oh you are so wrong about the flagship store of whole foods.


    if i could take the blindswine anywhere here in austin, it would be the there.


    and john mackey walks his talk, and therefore in my opinion, is beyond rebut. his corporate and retail employees enjoy exemplary benefits by any standards. he's vegan. he's a billionaire who owns an 1800 square foot house and drives a honda civic hybrid. whole foods invests in local agriculture and local organic farm raised animals.


    patrick, i really can't argue with you. austin is a really kick ass place to live all considering. i'm just a spoiled brat. also, now that i'm married with kids, i just don't enjoy the opportunity to enjoy what austin has to offer in the same way i used to when i first moved here. seeing live music is a luxury, which we pay for dearly not only in the price of admission, but also in the price of babysitting. mostly homebound, and mostly consumed by everything oriented for 2-3 year olds, i might as well be living next door to you in a cultureless southern sinkhole.


    ok. that's a little extreme. but still.


    stop comparing. stop agonizing about money. just be where you are for a while. those little girls depend on your happiness, fluidity, and flexibility. give love.








By sarah on Thursday, July 29, 2010 - 01:02 am:


    in the span of 10 days in september we will be ssing live the drive by truckers, the black crowes, and michael franti/spearhead.


    we're gonna have to save up some coin.




By la on Thursday, July 29, 2010 - 02:11 am:

    Huh. Didn't know that about the CEO, but with a company that size he obviously can't control every facet.

    Here in Portland, there's smaller companies that are more in tune with my morals and more convenient for me, so I choose them over WF.


By patrick on Thursday, July 29, 2010 - 12:44 pm:

    i love my whole foods and agree wholly what sarah said about
    how they treat their employees, that they purchase local
    whenever possible. as a business they are a gazillion more times
    responsible than 90% of the companies we are forced to deal
    with on a day to day basis.

    you're most right sarah. i've got a lot going on emotionally and
    pretty raw these days and don't have many outlets. i miss my
    shrink. putting it in such a way as to say the the girls need my
    happiness just like they need food and water is helpful.


    recently the new pornographers were in town and tickets we're
    $20 a pop. factor
    in a baby sitter, dinner, drinks and we were looking at a $120-
    150 evening.

    you know what blows? going out to see music and getting really
    impatient the headliner doesnt start till after 11 and the yawns
    start around 9:30 and I start longing for my bed.


By heather on Thursday, July 29, 2010 - 03:17 pm:

    i have to say that the can't stay up late enough for music thing (that i also experience) kind of cracks me up.

    there is a scrabble game that needs a third.


By kazu on Thursday, July 29, 2010 - 05:44 pm:

    We do sitter swaps with other families so we don't have to pay for baby sitters.


By Daniel on Thursday, July 29, 2010 - 07:04 pm:

    I can't get into scrabble though sarah had asked that someone send me a password. HGowever, I don't know how to play, and am word challenged.

    But I am still willing. Ditto on whole foods but if there's something smaller and locally owned I go there.

    Love the eating babies threadSSSS.

    <3 = or no= >3 ??? just curious.


By sarah on Friday, July 30, 2010 - 10:40 am:


    the whole foods flagship store downtown is an epicurean's wet dream. and it is actually one of the top tourist destinations is austin.

    in addition to regular ol' grocery shopping, inside there is a chocolatier, bakery, a specialty cheese kiosk, a bbq restaurant where you can sit and eat, a fresh fish restaurant where you can sit and eat (with a menu!), a sushi restaurant, a pizzaria, a trattoria, a walk in beer cooler, a crazy extensive wine selection, and a vegan and raw foods deli. just to name a few of the extras.

    prepared foods include an east indian bar, a chili bar, a chowder bar, a soup bar, a tex-mex bar, a dessert bar.

    oh and a (not Jamba Juice) juice/smoothie counter.

    the people who work there obviously love their jobs and know everything about their department. the meat guys know where the cows who produce their steaks are raised and what they eat. the fish guys know where their fish come from, what's in season and what's not. none of the staff are allowed to being any fast or convenience foods into the store. if they want to eat fast food for lunch or whatever, they have to it off premises.


    the prices are expensive, no doubt about it. i don't shop there often. but when i need just the right ingredient for something, i can find it there, no matter what it is. a whole squid? no problem.

    also, i never feel ripped off. their quality standards never fail, so even though it's pricey, i always feel like i got what i paid for.


    lastly, it's just gorgeous inside and out. the inside is spacious with gorgeous lighting. outside they built a little stream that runs through the outdoor seating area. on the rooftop there is a play scape for the kiddos, and in the winter they have ice skating on the roof.


    rumor has it they are building a newer, bigger store here in austin, that will end up being about 2.5 miles from my house. it's hard to imagine how they could possibly out-do the store downtown. we shall see.


    do i think whole foods the company is perfect? no. it's a publicly held corporation whose business it is to make money. but at least they practice conscious capitalism.


    i do 80% of my grocery shopping at the sun harvest (henry's brand retailer) that i can walk to from my house. but when i feel like eating a rosemary mint truffle with grey sea salt, or a round crusty loaf of whole grain spelt raisin walnut bread, or chipotle lime glazed salmon and caesar salad for dinner, and i don't have time to make it myself, i drive up to whole foods.





By patrick on Friday, July 30, 2010 - 11:36 am:

    the last i checked the beer cooler in the austin store had a
    magazine slot with our publication was being dropped in which
    is pretty fucking amazing considering how expensive such real
    estate is in the retail sector and the extreme high performance
    standards whole foods has.

    about 1/3rd of our grocery dollar goes to WF. The other two 3rds
    are divided between TJ, and Kroger, and a small percentage to
    the farmers market. Kroger here is getting a lot of better about
    the stuff we like to buy at whole foods in their organic ghetto.
    then when it doesnt sell, they slap these "manager's special"
    stickers on them for like 50% off and we swoop in and buy in
    bulk.




    i used to play scrabble and havent in years, but would love to get
    back in so email me the password if you are inclined.


By patrick on Friday, July 30, 2010 - 11:38 am:

    do they have a chocolate fountain at that store sarah?

    when they opened this two level gargantuan store in pasadena a
    couple of years back, they installed a big fucking chocolate fountain
    that was mesmerizing. me and the kid would just stand there,
    comatose watching it.


By la on Friday, July 30, 2010 - 02:41 pm:

    The WF around here pale in comparison.

    When Wild Oats bought Natures, Natures' higher ups got kicked out of the business. They started another chain, just local, called New Seasons.

    New Seasons isn't as luxe as your Whole Foods either. But they do have more affordable brands on the same shelves as the things I'd rather spend my money on, when I have the money. And because it's a smaller, local chain, that money is more likely to stay in town or be passed along to a small producer.

    A few years ago, WF was involved in some sort of a lawsuit and subpoenaed New Seasons' records, including business projections. Rumor had it that the subpoena was just so WF could see the business projections and the records weren't necessary for the hearing.

    I've been in the WF up in NW and it is a nice store. Just not in my neighborhood and not enough reasons to justify my shopping there. Most of the WF around here started out as Wild Oats or even Natures and they're smaller (for instance, only three aisles of dry goods so they have room for everything else) and often poorly laid out.

    The only WF built in the area since they took over Wild Oats was built in a neighborhood that has huge traffic problems on the day they have their farmers' market. Coincidence, I think not.

    I try to spend most of my food dollar at the local co-op (I volunteer there once a week for an additional discount) and supplement it with New Seasons and TJs. I eat out a lot too, it's my major luxury.

    I try to support smaller businesses when I can. I feel that, as a customer, my business is a greater boon there than at a larger chain. Smaller business don't need their producers to be as large, and don't require huge distribution centers that add miles to the food on my plate.

    Oregon is one of the last states with a larger proportion of their farms family-owned. It's important to me to support that. There's a large variety of locally-grown produce (even rumors of an olive grove further south in the state) and I could bike to a worker-owned grain mill in an hour.

    Perhaps I've read too much Michael Pollan, but I care a great deal about where my food comes from and how many steps are made between it and myself.


By sarah on Friday, July 30, 2010 - 04:20 pm:


    i've read too much michael pollan too, and i'd wager that when shopping for animal proteins and produce, i get the most nutrients per dollar when i spend it at whole foods.


    the exception of course being shopping for it at the farmers markets.


    and actually, me and some folks in my neighborhood have started taking turns placing orders and driving downtown to buy grass fed red meat out of the back of a truck from a couple of guys who drive it in from just outside the city limits. and man the price is right!


    yes, they have a gigantic 6 or 7-tier chocolate fountain. it is totally mesmerizing.




By Daniel on Saturday, July 31, 2010 - 10:45 am:

    George Carlin's Final Words To The World George Carlin on "The American Dream". The greatest 3 minutes of his career, and I think the final 3 minutes of his career. The PTB are aggressively trying to keep this video off YouTube and Google, so I thought I'd upload it so it can't get deleted as easily. Everyone needs to watch this!
    Length:3:12


    I can't get the link to load properly. But go to you tube and enjoy.

    Conscious capitalism? a rare treat, humor and reality tar tare.


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