sex and me


sorabji.com: Sex: sex and me
THIS IS A READ-ONLY ARCHIVE FROM THE SORABJI.COM MESSAGE BOARDS (1995-2016).

By Kymmi on Monday, November 29, 1999 - 03:03 pm:

    i have never been understanding of what was diferent about me sexually.

    until it occoured to me that i am a submissive female.

    i think what makes it even more taboo is being a black female. then i have to be living in the south.

    i don't think i am aroused by the whole emancipation scenario or anything.

    i like white guys, i like to be spanked. but i don't really like anything deeper than that.
    but people assume this.

    i guess it would seem like a logial assumption. but it simply is not true.

    i think a change of location will give me more perspective.


By Patrick on Monday, November 29, 1999 - 03:25 pm:

    you are a welcomed addition to the other handful of freaks and whatnots around here.

    i am from the south and living in LA, i lost my accent long ago while growing up, I dunno why, I am a white guy who likes to spank my wife intermittently, a change of scenary will do you wonders, especially a place like NYC.

    where in the south are you?



By Sarah on Monday, November 29, 1999 - 04:54 pm:

    kymmical has been a sorabjiite even longer than i have.


    nice to see you reappear, girl.



By Nate on Monday, November 29, 1999 - 05:09 pm:

    me too!

    but then, i think sarah's been here longer than i have.

    someone post the sorabji.com chronology, pronto!


By Fetidbeaver on Monday, November 29, 1999 - 05:11 pm:

    Do you like to be tied up?
    Were you molested as a child?
    Were you raised in a sexually repressive enviornment? Feel free to answer any or none of my nosey questions.


By Rhiannon on Monday, November 29, 1999 - 06:28 pm:

    Pardon the ignorance....but why is it taboo to be a black female and submissive?


By Sarah on Monday, November 29, 1999 - 06:50 pm:


    well, my guess is that it would appear to be taboo to one who is in the (very bad) habit of mixing sex and politics.




By Kymmi on Monday, November 29, 1999 - 07:12 pm:

    thank you for the welcome...
    i feel bad i haven't been back sooner i see i have missed much...

    i am crunching the previous posts.

    Bowie also says hi. she is starting a modeling career in Minnisota.

    i have found it to be somewhat difficult to meet guys who are my taste. when i meet a nice fellow here anyway, he is very anxious. and they often draw out the whle meeting of his parents things.
    now to take that (which i have tried this with very poor results) and mention that you like to be spanked or what not. they tend to work with what they have seen on some cheap porn or on MTV. and next thing i know i am having to tell him that i really really don't want to have sex with his friends.

    it is all so very confusing. and here in teas right through the middle in the bible belt, there just isn't much resource for the culture i consider myself interested in.

    nate you were here long before me...or at least a little while.

    as far as the questions. oddly enough i grew up catholic. maybe that does have something to do with it. i have a great interest in psychology, and close as i can figure i amlooking for someone that was as strict as my father but more tender than he was.


By Patrick on Monday, November 29, 1999 - 07:37 pm:

    you'll find everything you want and need and more in NYC


By Sarah on Monday, November 29, 1999 - 08:45 pm:

    Sorabji.com Chronology:


    In the beginning was Sheila...



By Agatha on Monday, November 29, 1999 - 09:51 pm:

    i was here before sheila. nyah.


By Gee on Monday, November 29, 1999 - 10:47 pm:

    ahh. Now I see why you make me suspicious. I didn't recognize you, but you didn't seem "new".

    I am the psychic chicken!!


By Hayden on Monday, November 29, 1999 - 11:22 pm:

    I was here before God, and Agatha is sexy.


By Antigone on Monday, November 29, 1999 - 11:30 pm:

    My first post on sorabji was on Monday, April 27, 1998 - 06:33 pm. Can you guess where it was?


By Sleepy Rhiannon on Monday, November 29, 1999 - 11:46 pm:

    Look at you, you little brat!

    First you asked me to do actual research to find out your sister's name, now you're asking people to actually muster the effort to go combing over the boards *just to find out when you first posted.*

    You're so demanding!




    PS. In case you ever need to know, the male form of the name Antigone is Antigonos.


By Antigone on Tuesday, November 30, 1999 - 12:15 am:

    Oh, come on. It's not much of a stretch! It's a simple search...

    And, I'm quite comfortable with my feminine side, thank you.

    Now get busy!


By Agatha on Tuesday, November 30, 1999 - 12:28 am:

    how could you know whether or not i am sexy?

    i began posting as kelsey, which is my real name. that was eons ago.


By Sarah on Tuesday, November 30, 1999 - 01:58 pm:


    alright, let me set the record straight kids.

    as far as i can assess, the original sorabjiite is actually Hala (aka nelly). she dates back to the Atlanta days. i'd guess that kelsey, maggie, and PicoFarad are earlier in the timeline than jim, dani, ridin, RC, and joanne. but right after them came spiracle, me, nate, swine, chordata, followed closely by Sheila.

    this was still in 1997. while i was a regular visitor at The Old Site, i didn't get up the balls to post anything until a couple years ago, but it was definitely close to right after Mark moved to NYC.

    back then mark was more than just the (mostly silent) emperor that he is now, he was also a serf, like us.

    btw, before i knew better, i thought nate was like 17 or 18 years old and swine seemed kinda scary.


    Ha!



By Patrick on Tuesday, November 30, 1999 - 02:04 pm:

    so mark has not time for us chumps anymore?
    you used to live in ATL Mark? whereabouts?


By Nate on Tuesday, November 30, 1999 - 02:43 pm:

    for some reason i remember chordata's arrival.

    i don't remember much else on the chron.


    obviously.

    i could have sworn kymmi was here before me.


By Agatha on Tuesday, November 30, 1999 - 09:17 pm:

    i'm pretty sure that mark doesn't post on the boards because they annoy him incessantly. it's like he created a monster that he no longer has any control over. hala was here forever. the two maggies were here for a long time, too, but they don't really come around anymore. a long time ago, dani got really mad at me. i used to be more easily provoked than i am now. an example of this is the fact that i have restrained myself from posting on the racial issues thread as much as i am able.


By Hayden on Tuesday, November 30, 1999 - 09:49 pm:

    I think speech impediments and angular noses are sexy.


By Antigone on Tuesday, November 30, 1999 - 11:48 pm:

    Hmmm... If Mark doesn't like these boards, maybe I can take them off his hands. I've been writing this discussion board software...


By Agatha on Wednesday, December 1, 1999 - 12:59 am:

    i don't have either of those characteristics, i'm afraid. i like a good angular schnozz, myself.


By R.C. on Wednesday, December 1, 1999 - 04:02 am:

    But wait -- whazzis abt it being 'taboo' for a Sister to be 'submissive'? Some of the meekest, most reserved women I've ever come across were Sisters -- esp. from da South. And it seems to me that wanting to be spanked is quite the opposite of submissive. The fact that you dig that & can express it openly makes you seem very direct & uninhibited, Kymical. I bet most guys wd love for their woman to ask to be spanked.

    As for moving to NYC -- don't even consider it/unless you've got piles & piles of $$. The housing prices have soared there in the 4 yrs. since I've left. About a year ago/I saw an ad in the Times for an apt. in my old bldg. in Jamaica Estates (which is in Queens/not NYC proper). The studio I rented from '92-'95 for $675 (& $75 of that was for a garage space) was going for $800 bucks -- w/out the parking! Sure/the bldg. has a doorman & it was in a decent neighborhood/but there's no way that crib was worth $800 bucks!

    Just to be nosy/I called abt it after I saw the ad. (I was scouting condos for my brother at the time.) And the place was rented! With no a.c./roaches & all!

    NY has always been terribly expensive/but even in Bklyn. & Queens/there aren't any places you can rent for less than a king's ransom nowadays.

    I blame it on Guiliani.


By Kymical on Wednesday, December 1, 1999 - 07:46 am:

    i don't think that there is anything wrong with my sexual appitite. i don't belive the things i like and want are unusual or absurd.

    really i just want it to be a little easier.
    like i would like to be able to approach any guy that strikes my fancy and not stop and think "hmmm, will he have a violent response to my advances?"

    and by the same token i have to wonder how he will feel about my fantisies of being tied up and such.

    it is strange only when guys use the submissive thing as breakup ammo.

    i was breaking up with this guy because he had gotten to be stagnant and he and i really weren't progressing. while i am talking to him on the phone he is begging and begging me to reconsider.
    then he says
    "if you want you can tie me up. i know you like that. i will buy handcuffs or something."

    i guess i found it to be somewhat flippiant and i hung up on him.

    as far as paying for new york. i got this master plan. i go to school and tell my pops (who makes too much god damn money) that i am going to be a brain surgeon. but the dorms are so unsavory and dangerous (i am his only child and a girl no less) and that i want to live off campus.

    i am hoping it works. i think it would equate out to any school's room and board fee.


By SE on Wednesday, December 1, 1999 - 01:13 pm:

    I was there from the early times, when people were nice to each other, bwahahahahahah. The "dreamtime". Things were sooo much better then.

    SE


By Patrick on Wednesday, December 1, 1999 - 01:35 pm:

    as a guy, i think most fellas would agree if you asked us to spank you, none would have problem....abnd if they do, its their prob not yours. my wife calls me "daddy" every now and then, it's kinda of fun......perhaps i have said too much


By Patrick on Wednesday, December 1, 1999 - 02:05 pm:

    i hate to hear that about mark, i feel mostly responsible becasue he was still posting when i came around. being the blockhead i am, things seemed to get ugly at times and thats when he stopped.....thats a shame, and i feel bad considering i love this place and i appreciate the work he does for it.........sorry mark, despite what you may think, this place is still unique...


By Lucy Phurre on Wednesday, December 1, 1999 - 04:11 pm:

    Kymical:
    I don't know. Dorms are great if you're carrying a heavy courseload and don't mind having to work around a bunch of silly regulations and blowing off group activities.
    The other problem with dorms is noise, because people have these damned parties and they're on a football scholarship or something and don't understand that other people have to study.
    Dorms are easier to deal with than an apartment, though esp. in a difficult housing market.

    But the raciest group activity was a "getting to know you session" where a sorority chick described herself as, I shit you not, "boy crazy"

    I don't know what NY is like though.

    I don't know, I found the dorms a bit dull, and the damned frat-rats are irritating.

    They used to crank call me in the middle of the night. I'm sure you've seen the behavior before. If you don't fit in to their little world and don't care, they use petty harassment until you acknowledge them, even if it's by yelling at them.

    I had one crank call that was pretty funny though, and I thought I'd close with that, since it's my one good college story:

    Fratboy: Hi, I'm Seth Weber, and I want to go out with you.
    (Note, Seth Weber is apparently a famous basketball player, but I'm not sure I have the name right)
    Lucy Phurre: Who?
    FB: Seth Weber, the basketball player.
    LP(who tutored athletic study hall):Do I tutor you?
    FB: No. I'm *Seth* *Weber*, you know, the *basketball* player.
    LP: Do I know you from the cafeteria then?
    FB: No. I'm Seth Weber.
    LP: I'm afraid it doesn't ring a bell. Can you refresh my memory?

    The fratboy eventually gave up and hung up the phone in disgust.

    I learned the next day that the moron had bee pretending to be someone famous, when I recounted the conversation to a friend.

    So that's irritating, but it's also funny, because the guys that make the prank calls tend to be dumb jocks and it's not difficult to throw them off (I've done it while trying to, but never as well as I did when I totally baffled this guy unintentionally).


By Sorabji on Wednesday, December 1, 1999 - 04:58 pm:

    what the fuck, i never said i don't like the boards. i've never even thought it. i find them both fascinating at times and boring at other times, but it's not my idea to impose my personality on them or pass any kind of judgment. who would even give a crap if i did? i get enough crap as it is from strangers who tell me my site sucks and so do i.

    anyway, those feelings are actually kind of complicated, so never mind, but the only thing i ever wanted to do with sorabji.com was to have boards like these and to keep them spam-free. knowing that this is a place where people feel comfortable makes me, well, happy. if that's really possible. BBSes have been a hobby of mine since 1992. which is not that long, relatively speaking. these require a lot of work (in case anyone still thinks they're self-maintaining).

    SE has probably been around here the longest, except for possibly Christop, who has been around since the site was on Panix in 1994.

    Another person (who, coincidentally, works in the same office building as I) has also been coming around since 1994. He is the first person who ever recognized me from my website and introduced himself to me out of the blue by asking "Are you Sorabji?"

    some friends from college and high school have also lurked during these years. other then that, there are a few women who write to me when they're in-between boyfriends, and a cadre of others who say they've been along for the ride since 1995. for the most part during the last couple of years i've become more concerned with protecting my privacy and developing other parts of my life than with corresponding on-line. nothing petrifies me more than a stranger walking up to me and asking "Are you Sorabji?" or "Aren't you the guy with the website ... ?" because i never know what part of the site they're familiar with, or what they think they know about me.

    i guess it's easy to take someone's silence and project whatever you want onto it. but i'm expecting these boards to be around for a long time to come. assuming they don't implode under some undiscovered force. --bye


By Patrick on Wednesday, December 1, 1999 - 05:22 pm:

    YAAYYYYY!!!!!

    thanks for the clarification..........wish you could be around more.......


By Sarah on Wednesday, December 1, 1999 - 08:05 pm:


    i forgot christop. i'm so ashamed.



By Agatha on Wednesday, December 1, 1999 - 08:25 pm:

    yes, of course christop and se have been around forever, too. dave got a cell phone case, what a geek. mark posted, how neat. i guess i was wrong. it happens every now and again.


By Sarah on Wednesday, December 1, 1999 - 08:33 pm:


    how was your trip to NYC with cleo? you never dished.



By Agatha on Wednesday, December 1, 1999 - 09:53 pm:

    that's because it hasn't happened yet. i will dish on a day close to the end of december.


By Christop on Thursday, December 2, 1999 - 02:35 am:

    still here. like you care.


By Sarah on Thursday, December 2, 1999 - 03:18 am:

    i care. jeeezis you guys. what's your deal anyway? always scuffling around in the shadows, sending each other porn emails. come out and play more often, alright?






By Agatha on Thursday, December 2, 1999 - 12:18 pm:

    mwah, christop. i care.


By J on Friday, December 3, 1999 - 12:18 pm:

    Christop,this is the first time I,ve seen you post since I started coming here back last March,went to your site though.


By SE on Tuesday, December 7, 1999 - 01:14 pm:

    The internet is so pervasive compared to the early tripe. I love to fuck people up by overusing 'cyber' and making the finger quatation marks whenever I say 'internet' or 'web'.
    You can stop an entire meeting by blurting out,
    "I hear they have the internet on computers now" which I stole from homer, homer simpson that is.

    I walk up to homeless people all the time and say, "Are you Sorabji, that guy on the 'web'.", making finger " " marks in space. I just find the most derilict lice bitten mook, and figure its him.
    And I mean that in a 'nice' way.

    SE


By SE on Tuesday, December 7, 1999 - 01:18 pm:


By Patrick on Tuesday, December 7, 1999 - 01:22 pm:

    Austin Powers?


By SE on Tuesday, December 7, 1999 - 01:24 pm:

    on your right there wisenheimer


By Patrick on Tuesday, December 7, 1999 - 01:39 pm:

    nice skooters


By Alan on Sunday, November 16, 2003 - 11:39 pm:

    I found this page and thought I'd ask if anyone can help me figure myself out. Does anyone know of some research that determines what makes someone interested in any form of BDSM, such as spanking? Statistically, what makes a man crave being dominated by a woman? I feel bad because it's not like you can just put this out on the table when you date. "Well, before we get started, you wouldn't happen to like inflicting pain on someone, would you?" I find myself fantasizing every time I see a woman, sizing her up to try and judge if she has potential. I'm not even going to list those items that spark my interest; you'd probably find them pitiful. Or arousing, depending on your view, I suppose. Honestly, I try not to let that prejudicial feeling come into play, but the fantasy is always there; I can't deny or subdue it. Have you ever read anything, anywhere, by some professor or college study making a generalization on the typical want-to-be-spanked male?


By Lapis on Monday, November 17, 2003 - 12:53 am:

    Yo Mama.


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