| THIS IS A READ-ONLY ARCHIVE FROM THE SORABJI.COM MESSAGE BOARDS (1995-2016). |
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1. Short, black business-type skirts. 2. Tight jeans on females, especially navy/black ones. |
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Here's a tissue to wipe that thing off!!!! |
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2) They're booooorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrring. Condition yourself until you can't come unless you're sucking on the ear of a stuffed rabbit while your partner is wearing white gym socks, and then tell us about it. |
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i'm proud. |
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"the road of excess leads to the palace of wisdom." - blake, proverbs of hell |
i don't have a fetish. |
You can have "things," though. Like I have a "thing" for preachers. T'ain't nothing wrong with that. Yay, I didn't take home my 16 Horsepower CDs after all! |
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I don't think I would say that people shouldn't have fetishes. I just don't. |
You think Harold, who likes to lick the Steve Maddens of women on the toilet, shouldn't call it a fetish or Harold shouldn't be doing that to begin with? |
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if you need diapers to get of, you need help. |
I know people who consider themselves leather fetishists for example but im pretty sure they wouldn't say they "NEED" leather to get off. Which brings us full circle to why the notion of "fetish" is pretty retarded. NEXT!!!! |
No, and that's where they're wrong when they call themselves fetishists. That's what a fetish is... a *need,* as in, you can't do it any other way. It's not a retarded concept at all, when the term is used correctly. It's just like someone, you know, feeling a little crazy one day and deciding to call themselves schizophrenic. Wrong! Or gosh, I have a bit of a cough: I have tuberculosis! Wrong! |
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fetish: >n. an inanimate object worshipped for supposed magical powers or because it is considered to be inhabited by a spirit. •a course of action to which one has an excessive or irrational commitment: "he had a fetish for writing more opinions each year than any other justice." • a form of sexual desire in which gratification is linked to an abnormal degree to a particular object, item of clothing, body part, etc.: "victorian men developed fetishes focusing on feet, shoes, and boots." * patrick has a fetish for writing more opinions on a message board than any other sorabjite. spider has a fetish for psychological terms and their correct usage. guess what my fetish is. |
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*this has been an opinion free post* |
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A large Transvestite in a purple wig,heart-shaped sunglasses, and thigh high vinyl boots 2 large salmon fillets Me. In the bathtub. quivering with the jello. The bathroom door is kicked in by the hideously large transvestite. She is holding the salmon fillets, 1 in each hand. I begin to scream uncontrollably as she climbs into the tub with me. She is smacking me with the salmon filets, while simultaneously stepping on me, pushing me deeper into the lime green jello. As I am being asphyxiated by the jello, not to mention her formidable weight, She begins to sing the aria from "Madame Butterfly": "Un bel dí, vedremo Levarsi un fil di fumo Sull´estremo confin del mare..." Her screeching, lovelorn wails keep me from passing out as her 5 inch platform heels drive me down, deeper and deeper.Silver skyrockets explode across my field of vision as I climax, and succumb to blessed unconsciousness. I awake filled with an awful sense of regret and self loathing. I go out to the all night coffee shop where I insult the waitress until I am thrown out. |
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Oh god. I didn't mean that. |
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Just for the recortd, I've always had nose hair, whpose function was to clean the -- oh well never mind. It was only after fifty that I named each one of them. |
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though it seems nose hair proliferates with age, this is not the case. the nose hair is always there. what happens is the skin changes around the nose with age, revealing the nose hair, hence scenes like those old jewish men i see everyday on the bus with more nose and ear hair than I have on my body entirely. |
Where's Droopy, so we can tease him some more? |
i knew it. that's not quite the way i heard it about the nose hair thing. i've heard that, when you get old, the distribution of moisture in your body changes - while you're young, it's evenly distributed everywhere, but as you grow old it sort of recedes. this is why your skin gets dry and wrinkly and you're hair gets grey and falls out and grows more slowly. but where some of the moisture goes is in or around your ears and nose, stimulating the growth of the hair that was always there. this may or may not be what actually happens. all i know is that i've got a couple of balding, dry-skinned great-uncles with serious nose hair problems. |
Hence, the plucking action. |
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Antigone, I have an anti-fetish, which involves me pointedly ignoring skillfully placed non-sequiturs, unless they involve some very clever play on words. Now dance for me. |
I'm very phobic of heights and think I might possibly be phobic of marine life in general....does this mean I have a fetish for these things? Are phobias fetishes? Or vice versa? |
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Just promise me you'll throw little pickles at my feet. |
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mmmmm pickles. that's my fetish. |
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what isn't wrong with me? |
other than that, i love pickles. |
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thanks spider. i know you were just kidding. i was feeling sorry for myself and being a big baby. can't seem to get out of it. good thing i convinced my gyno today to give me a scrip for 10mg sarafim. aka prozak. uh, yeah. maybe it will get me to stop praying to god for death. |
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kosher? spicy dills? bread and butter? |
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Restraints and Depends, a little thorazine goes a long way when you pretend to be sane. |
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LS |
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