Antlers and Santa Hats for Pets


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THIS IS A READ-ONLY ARCHIVE FROM THE SORABJI.COM MESSAGE BOARDS (1995-2016).

By
Margret on Wednesday, December 15, 1999 - 09:33 am:

    I bought some. Everytime I put the antlers on any of the cats' or the dog's head, I laugh myself stupid, then let the critter take out it's humiliation on the offending headgear. But they should definitely be outlawed. I'm too weak not to be cruel, but the cats REALLY hate it and the dog is less than perfectly happy (but more of a good sport, being a dog). Heh heh. I am a bad person.


By agatha on Wednesday, December 15, 1999 - 11:37 am:

    have you ever noticed on the halloween outfits for your pets how totally pissed off the animals on the package look? it makes me feel bad. it is funny though, kinda like putting a piece of tape on your cat's foot and watching it cha cha cha.


By Patrick on Wednesday, December 15, 1999 - 01:22 pm:

    the thought of dauschounds (spell?) aka weiner dogs with those silly antlers makes me laugh, otherwise it's pretty damn cruel.

    My mom used to put bells on Sir Dudley Dooright the Dalmation at xmas time, despite my protests, the other mutt, Buster always had them on.

    thats *NOT NICE*


By Crimson on Wednesday, December 15, 1999 - 04:01 pm:

    i can't really groove on the whole clothing-the-animals thing. if animals were meant to wear clothes, they'd come out of the womb wearing fucking designer suits.

    but then again, so would humans.

    never mind.


By Isolde on Wednesday, December 15, 1999 - 04:12 pm:

    Baby Gap?


By Margret on Wednesday, December 15, 1999 - 04:41 pm:

    PetSmart, where I bought the antlers while on a bulk wet foods buying binge, actually had what made my mother chortle up deep fried food when I told her about it -- zebra and leopard print capes/sweaters/coats for dogs. My mom just couldn't get over the notion of covering up the animal's real fur with FAKE FUR. It slew her.
    I almost bought the dog one, again out of an impulse to torture. Heh. I was scared off when a toy poodle owner with trembling aforementioned toy poodle in the seat of her cart started making conversation with me while browsing the same items. If it was not immediately clear that I was there to shop instruments of ironic torture then I wanted no part of it. The clerk and I had a good snicker over the antlers at the checkout area, though. I should join some sort of pet torturing recovery group. You should see their FACES, though, when I put the antlers on. They're so incredibly TOLERANT while conveying with absolute unequivocality that SOMEDAY I WILL PAY. But I am the "giver of wetfoods" and their revenge must be subtle.


By R.C. on Wednesday, December 15, 1999 - 07:38 pm:

    I've seen those annoying little dogs in sweaters while they were being walked on cold days in NY. They seemed to appreciate the protection against the cold. I wd think fur wd be enuf protection/ but small dogs usually don't have very thick coats.


By Gee on Thursday, December 16, 1999 - 01:24 am:

    My sister bought a Santa Suit for her dog, Dustball. He's a small dog (sorry RC) and she's always liked dressing him up. He really likes it, though. Everytime she pulls out one of his sweaters (he's got a ton of them) he gets all excited and starts dancing around. That's nice because he's an old dog with only one eye, so he needs some happiness.

    When I was younger (not much younger) I used to have a lot of fun dressing the husky up in human clothes. I'd put a tee-shirt and shorts and socks on him and then laugh when he tried to walk around. He doesn't like clothes quite as much as Dustball does. He has a little blue hat and everytime my sister puts it on him he sits there with a mad look until someone removes it.

    That's okay, though. I have two Santa hats, one elf hat and a pair of antlers for Myself, so they always get the last laugh.


By Rhiannon on Friday, December 17, 1999 - 11:26 am:

    Far down the river
    Out in the darkness
    Something's out there
    Soft red heart

    Chorus:
    Aye aye, my merry lads
    It's a lively tale, this to tell
    give it a taste, it's worth bottling
    We'll do some dancing here!

    Black spot, white wigs
    Sophistication
    Lace cuffs, thick fingers
    Test the fine steel

    Chorus

    Gently the blade slides
    Thru sweet white flesh
    The warm blood falls
    Fills the glass up

    Chorus

    Tracks in history
    Like piss in the snow
    Poxy lips foul breath
    Just get up and go!

    Diseases epidemical in this country
    Are tyrannical oppression
    and the want of necessities of life
    No. A Merry life and a short one
    shall be my motto. Woooo!


    --J. Langford


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