nate, if i made you a little shrine with a spanish holy card and lots of sequins and glitter and gaudiness, akin to something you'd find in mexico around halloween, would you keep it? it would be maybe 6" x 8" and wooden. if the answer is yes, email me.

i would keep it, but i guess that wasn't the question.

Hey, do you want one? They're fun to make. Email me with your address. I made one for my mother for Easter. It had a Portuguese holy card of the Sacred Heart in the center with black and red sequins all around the edges of the frame, tiny fluorescent beads on the insides of the box (it was a picture-box wooden frame), and small rhinestones around the heart itself. It rocked, if I do say so myself.

if you make me one, i will send you a st. michael icon and holy earth from el santuario de esquipulas in the chimayo valley of new mexico.

It's a deal.

if you send me one, i'll send you...well, something. probably a couple of medals or holy cards. a pack of slim jims. a 1920s postcard. a walnut. an inflatable giraffe. something.

I wish my mail would come before my husband got home,I'm missing out on alot here.

How about a PO box, J?

Deal, Crimson. That's 3 so far. Any more requests? Speak before 5 pm EST tomorrow night or forever hold your peace.

absolutely, spider. but why me?

I bought a t-shirt in esquipulas, guatemala, at the gift shop of the church of the black christ. it's way too small for me, so john paul's face gets distorted when I wear it stretched tight over my breasts.

I totally want one. I'll have to come up with something cool to mail you back...

I want one too! How about I actually send the Kiwi mix cd rather than a shocking retro album and candy?

So that's six? Egads. OK. I don't know, Nate. I felt like it. Moonit, I still owe you American candy, so I'll stick that in your package, too.

Me too!I have the perfect spot for it. I have a dead,almost saint that lives in my neighborhood.Charlene.I will send you Charlene holy cards,and perhaps you could incorporate them into some of your future creations.If you would like,I can go to her grave,and take pictures,there is all kinds of gawdy stuff people leave all over her grave,I guess in hopes of the "barter system",kinda,I'll leave you something tacky,and now you can answer my prayers.

Czarina, would you like me to make you a Charlene shrine? Send the pictures to me in advance and I'll do it. I'm all for local saints. Email me for my address.

spider - i put the finishing touch on the shrine i made you with the skull of a dead possum. now i don't think i can part with it. or that you would actually want it. maybe i'll just send you a picture of it. john paul stretched over cyst's breasts. now that's art.

Give it to me. You keep the picture of it.

How about a shrine to St. Joey Ramone?

No. You can make that yourself.

Thanks Spider!I'll email you tonight.

Agatha, send me your address. I finished your shrine. Look, people. I need a confirmed list of who wants a shrine. I'm sending them to Agatha (done) Droopy ('cause he made me one) Nate ('cause he needs one) Crimson ('cause I have a cool idea for one) Anybody else - EMAIL ME your address. Thank you, and good night.

What about me? Wasn't I on the list once too?

Did you send me your address? Huh? Huh?