The Sorabji Melbourne Cup


sorabji.com: Are there any news?: The Sorabji Melbourne Cup
THIS IS A READ-ONLY ARCHIVE FROM THE SORABJI.COM MESSAGE BOARDS (1995-2016).

By Cat on Sunday, November 5, 2000 - 04:27 am:

    Paul Hogan, Fosters, Waltzing Matilda and the Melbourne Cup. The last of these Aussie icons is a horse race. But not just any old nag gander. This one brings the wheels of our fine country to a grinding halt. In schools, pubs, churches, offices, everyone stops to watch or listen to the Big Race. And being a country of punters, we love to take a little gander on the Cup.

    You'll be delighted to know Melbourne Cup Day is on this Tuesday, or Monday night if you're on the dark side.

    Now there's another great tradition around Cup Day...and it's called "The Sweep". Basically you pick a horse's name out of the hat and if it wins, you've got yourself a free beer or two.

    So you're not left out just because you're 7,000 miles away...here's your chance for a piece of the action. Just pick a horse and post your choice. Winner takes all. I'm not sure what the winner actually takes yet...maybe a percentage of all the Sorabji.com profit...or maybe a stuffed koala, a sample of drain hair from Mark's shower, or some equally valuable artifact.

    The horses are...

    1. Enzeli
    2. Far Cry
    3. Arctic Owl
    4. Diatribe
    5. Free Mason
    6. Lightning Arrow (the only US horse)
    7. Second coming
    8. Coco Cobanna
    9. Kaapstad Way
    10. Mardipour
    11. The Hind
    12. Yippyio
    13. Bohemiath
    14. Our Unicorn
    15. Pasta Express
    16. Skybeau
    17. Hill of Grace
    18. Citra's Prince
    19. Majestic Avenue
    20. Mr Nelson
    21. Pravda
    22. Celestial Show
    23. Maguire
    24. Brew


By Isolde on Sunday, November 5, 2000 - 09:13 am:

    That's a huge field! Damn!
    Is this the gate order they're starting from?
    I choose Diatribe.


By Antigone on Sunday, November 5, 2000 - 06:10 pm:

    Number nine...
    Number nine...
    Number nine...


By Z on Sunday, November 5, 2000 - 06:25 pm:

    Antigone, did i send you that questionairre?


By Nelly on Sunday, November 5, 2000 - 06:39 pm:

    Gotta love Pasta Express...


By moonit on Sunday, November 5, 2000 - 08:05 pm:

    Yippyio. woohooo.

    New Zealand also stops for this race.


By Neds cousin Daniel SSSS on Sunday, November 5, 2000 - 09:48 pm:

    23. Maguire will win it without a struggle. If there is a struggle, I have instructed the jockey (Ned "Loose " Spincther) to spray Mace out the horse's ass into the faces of the other other horses just out of the gate.

    Should be a shoe-in. I'll donate hair from my shower drain too.

    Dark side. Huh.


By Cat on Sunday, November 5, 2000 - 09:58 pm:

    Wasn't Ned Maguire the funniest movie? Practically every time I see a moped, I think "thin nakey irishman with saggy bits".

    Excellent choices. But I thought "Brew" would go earlier because you're a mob of bloody drunks.



By Cat on Sunday, November 5, 2000 - 09:59 pm:

    "Ned Devine" was the movie...Damn. Sorry. Total bloody idiot here. I'll shut up now.


By jusmiceelf on Sunday, November 5, 2000 - 10:37 pm:

    The devil will take The Hind most


By Antigone on Sunday, November 5, 2000 - 10:59 pm:

    Z: No. I have no idea what you're talking about.

    Send it.


By Z on Monday, November 6, 2000 - 02:24 am:

    hindmost

    but why? usually, the hindmost are the least motivated, or the ones with less-than-wholesome intent, say you not? So why would the devil take the souls of his supporters? of those that agree with his values?

    right.

    eep. sorry, antigone. its a bit late, but i'll try to get it to you anyway.


By Tom on Monday, November 6, 2000 - 04:20 am:

    My hair's on Citra's prince.


By Isolde on Monday, November 6, 2000 - 08:35 am:

    It's on Tuesday? Excellent, I'll be watching the computer for the elections and for the results of the cup....


By Daniel ssss on Monday, November 6, 2000 - 10:04 am:

    Yes there are horse's asses running in the election too.

    Didn't see the movie. Ned's a hermaphrodite jockey who wears his Hanes on his head. No telling what Gore and Bush are. Nor what they wear. Horse races are so much more honest than American politics.


By Cat on Monday, November 6, 2000 - 10:37 pm:

    Ok it's only an hour till the race and there's still some nags up for grabs. So I have just been a big bossy britches and allocated them out:

    Mavis - Coco Cabanna, because it's the only horse trained by a woman, and she (the woman, not the horse) wears absolutely divine hats.

    Sem - Lightning Arrow, because he's probably always digging up arrow heads. I know it's a bloody stretch, shut up.

    Nate - Brew. I would have gone for Hind, but that was taken. I figure this would be his second favourite thing.

    Patrick - Enzeli. I can't think of a reason.

    Sorabji - Skybeau. I don't need a reason.

    Tom - Free Mason. Cause Tom's an anarchist and is always supposed to be trying to free something or anything.

    Rhi - Hill of Grace. I always imagine Rhi to be quiet and graceful and very sweet.

    J - Mardipour. Cause I know she likes a drink.

    Czarina - Citra's Prince. Both quite regal names.

    Dougie - Far Cry. Um...Dougie lives a long far way away from me and I was running out of horses.

    Gee - Arctic Owl. She lives near the Arctic and works in a library (I think) and is supposed to have that owl-like look. Easy peasy.

    Droopy - Bohemiath. Again, no big correlation and I need to go drink so I can't make any more up.


By Cat on Monday, November 6, 2000 - 10:54 pm:

    I almost forgot..dave. and Agatha get Second Coming in honour of the beautiful Cleo.


By Cat on Monday, November 6, 2000 - 11:27 pm:


By NZA on Monday, November 6, 2000 - 11:29 pm:

    I had Kaapstad Way in the sweep. Must go see who won....


By NZA on Monday, November 6, 2000 - 11:31 pm:

    damn, 4th. Never mind, always next year!


By Daniel ssss on Monday, November 6, 2000 - 11:52 pm:

    Postscript:

    "and out of the jungle of liquored bodies come the lucky lady and her entourage, like horses and jockeys themselves, humaned by the fullness of fresh ice cold shrimp deveined and ready, and of too much expensive red wine, all laboring to see the final sweaty panting of creaking leather and lathered hide, all running together in the darkness, uncontrollably, as if one excess led into another the paddock refreshed and giddy from the experience.

    and so it was with her once he left, her hand grazing such a late night memory..."


By Cat on Monday, November 6, 2000 - 11:54 pm:

    I put 5 bucks on Kaapstad. My entire pocket money gone down the drain in a tubful of buttfucking grandmothers. Oh darn.


By J on Tuesday, November 7, 2000 - 12:23 am:

    You know,if I'm tanked enough,I don't care if I lose,but I have to be really,really gassed.


By patrick on Tuesday, November 7, 2000 - 12:09 pm:

    what the fuck is this and why am i involved? im so outta the loop.


By Gee on Tuesday, November 7, 2000 - 03:06 pm:

    at least You don't look like an owl.


By Cat on Tuesday, November 7, 2000 - 05:12 pm:

    Oh Blossoms I just didn't want you to be left out. I'll never ever give you a horse again even if it could mean you winning some fabulous limited edition drain hair. Promise.

    And sorry Gee, I'm very sure you don't look at all like any form of poultry. It was just the library thing. It made sense at the time, but that's what cheap champagne does to you.


By Isolde on Tuesday, November 7, 2000 - 06:01 pm:

    Are owls classified as poultry?


By Poultry on Tuesday, November 7, 2000 - 06:23 pm:

    Well I know in America, "poultry" only refers to domesticated fowl. However, in my language "poultry" is a noun that can be substituted for any other noun.

    For example: "The cat sat on the mat" could become "The poultry sat on the mat".

    Or "a tubful of buttfucking grandmothers" could become "a tubful of buttfucking poultry".

    It's hard to fully explain unless you understand the writings of W.L. Manure who maintained that poultry was the universal truth.


By moonit on Tuesday, November 7, 2000 - 07:43 pm:

    i knew i should of tried the new tab online betting service.


By Daniel ssss on Tuesday, November 7, 2000 - 10:53 pm:

    oh


By agatha on Wednesday, November 8, 2000 - 01:16 am:

    i was an afterthought, patrick. an after-afterthought, even. so don't feel bad about being involved.

    i'm crying over here.


By Cat on Wednesday, November 8, 2000 - 03:30 am:

    Agatha you are my first thought in the morning, and my last thought at night before I lay me down to sleep. I just didn't want to say anything before because I'm shy.

    I feel better now it's out.

    (Mark, I'll give you my firstborn child if you'll delete this thread before I have to grovel anymore. Please.)


By J on Wednesday, November 8, 2000 - 06:34 am:

    What was Cleo for Halloween ?


By patrick on Wednesday, November 8, 2000 - 11:42 am:

    i still don't know what the fuck any of this chit chat is about....

    like i said, with my trip to nyc, the parental visit over the weekend, my birthday (im 26 danke schon) i've been unable to read everything...but thanks for the consolation agatha...


By agatha on Wednesday, November 8, 2000 - 12:02 pm:


By J on Wednesday, November 8, 2000 - 12:27 pm:

    How cute,she looks pretty happy with it,I only had about 20 kids come here on Halloween,must have been cause it was a school night.Wish I had bought reece cups instead of snickers now.


By Isolde on Wednesday, November 8, 2000 - 12:50 pm:

    She looks very smug in the second picture.


By Gee on Wednesday, November 8, 2000 - 02:53 pm:

    she has a right to look smug.


By J on Wednesday, November 8, 2000 - 03:44 pm:

    When your Cleo's age and in costume,you just know your the bomb.We got to take Jonathon to a Halloween Party on Oct.27th at my husbands work,they have a costume contest for the kids and games and pumkin carving.The contest is according to their age,so when the 6 and 7 years old's went up there,the band was playing a song kind of like the hokey-pokey,the kids were supposed to clap and turn around etc.Poor Jon just wouldn't do it(I don't think he could see well out of his mask,but he wouldn't let me fix it).It was funny,he was the only kid not co-operating,he got mad when he didn't win.I don't know where he gets his temper.


By Isolde on Wednesday, November 8, 2000 - 04:02 pm:

    I didn't say she didn't have a right to. She just looks smug. I look smug sometimes. Not today, though.


By agatha on Wednesday, November 8, 2000 - 07:30 pm:

    she actually looks smug a lot of the time. at least she's confident, for now. i hope the confidence sticks around until she makes it through the evil teen years.


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