the mighty unicorn in texas


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THIS IS A READ-ONLY ARCHIVE FROM THE SORABJI.COM MESSAGE BOARDS (1995-2016).

By droopy on Tuesday, July 24, 2001 - 01:22 pm:

    my sister was in town last night. she's going through a break-up with the guy she'd been living with. so she and i and a friend of hers named mary jane all went to the oui lounge, which is up and running again after the fire. she tells me a story about her boss and his kids.

    jeremy, her immediate boss at the tennis ranch, is from zimbabwe. he's white. his wife is named debbie and i think she's american. this past weekend they decided to take their kids to the lake. it was their six year old daughter, 8 year old son, and a friend of the son's named beau or bo, also 8. they go to some secluded beach on the lake, and jeremy and his son strip down naked to go swimming. bo is not comfortable with being nude, being american and all, but jeremy tells him that in zimbabwe they always went swimming naked and it was ok. (every time i hear stories about jeremy, it makes me think of Swimming to Cambodia. "he's from SOUTH AFRICA.") so bo strips down and soon becomes comfortable with it and has fun.

    when it's time to leave, the two boys come straight out of the water, towel off, and get into the suv naked. on the way home, jeremy hears bo say "look, i am the mighty unicorn!"

    bo had an erection. apparently skinny-dipping was a real revelation for him. i'm assuming that, even in these modern times, the full implications of an erection are somewhat lost on an 8 year old. he's proudly brandishing it and waving it about and saying "i am the mighty unicorn!" and making sure that everyone is sharing the moment with him. even the six year old.

    jeremy thinks this is funny, but tells bo to "put that thing away" anyway. he has him put a towel on it for the rest of the ride home.

    my sister and mary jane don't know what to make of this story. women just don't understand erections.


By patrick on Tuesday, July 24, 2001 - 01:48 pm:

    thats a riot.


    heather your "boys are funny"

    comment is better suited here.


By heather on Tuesday, July 24, 2001 - 01:53 pm:

    yeah


    i like that story

    super for a film
    probably wouldn't go very very well, though


By semillama on Tuesday, July 24, 2001 - 01:56 pm:

    that's cute.

    It's also a fantastic line.


By Nate on Tuesday, July 24, 2001 - 01:57 pm:

    wow. my day has been fundementally changed.

    some day soon i too will be the mighty unicorn.


By patrick on Tuesday, July 24, 2001 - 02:11 pm:

    there's potential for new and improved come on lines in there somewhere.


By Nate on Tuesday, July 24, 2001 - 03:34 pm:

    come on patty.

    I AM THE MIGHTY UNICORN!


By patrick on Tuesday, July 24, 2001 - 03:43 pm:

    some day soon arrived well....SOON


    GooGooMuck


By patrick on Tuesday, July 24, 2001 - 03:43 pm:

    and stop touching me nate


By ANTIGONE on Tuesday, July 24, 2001 - 03:45 pm:

    I AM THE VERY MODEL OF A MODERN MIGHTY UNICORN
    I LOVE TO SURF THE INTERNET AND DOWNLOAD NASTY ANAL PORN
    I KNOW THE SITES THAT SICKEN, QUICKEN PULSES, AND ENGORGE THE HORN
    I AM THE VERY MODEL OF A MODERN MIGHTY UNICORN


By Spider on Tuesday, July 24, 2001 - 04:02 pm:

    He wasn't touching you, Patrick, silly. He was with me at the time.


By patrick on Tuesday, July 24, 2001 - 04:03 pm:

    ANTIGONE STOP TOUCH ME WITH THAT DAMN THING!!!




By fucko on Tuesday, July 24, 2001 - 04:03 pm:

    -ING


By Spider on Tuesday, July 24, 2001 - 04:04 pm:

    Ohhhhhhh, Patrick's touching himself.


By Cat on Tuesday, July 24, 2001 - 04:24 pm:

    hehehehe. You're all touched.

    I want to marry Bo when he grows up. That's too adorable.

    I wish women got erections (not just borrowed them). They really look like lots of fun to have.

    It must just be the catholic schoolgirl in me, but talking about erections makes me giggle.


By Cat on Tuesday, July 24, 2001 - 04:54 pm:

    Go to WAYD. Quick. Run. It's too funny.


By Cat on Tuesday, July 24, 2001 - 05:06 pm:

    The post by Atwell, George C.


By patrick on Tuesday, July 24, 2001 - 05:15 pm:

    erections can be humiliating sometimes.


    like when your loved one, arouses you right before you walk into the grocery store. just for fun, and you have to sit in the hot car and wait it out.

    you do get erections...sorta of cat.


By patrick on Tuesday, July 24, 2001 - 05:18 pm:


By heather on Tuesday, July 24, 2001 - 06:53 pm:

    that first very of mine was supposed to be 'over'

    wouldn't go over very well



    that scene would have vastly improved ai.

    the happy couple and their new robot son.

    every fairy tale needs a unicorn.


By Dougie on Tuesday, July 24, 2001 - 06:54 pm:


By wisper on Wednesday, July 25, 2001 - 05:46 pm:

    erections make me laugh like hell.
    it's so funny lookin'.

    how many times, in the heat of passion, have i burst out pointing and giggling "it's not you, no, i SWEAR, i do this every time hahahAHAHAHaha! Sorry! no seriously it's not you, you're just fine, really"

    lol

    the lack of control kills me every time. fun game.


By Antigone on Wednesday, July 25, 2001 - 05:53 pm:

    I know. I have the same reaction to women who get all wet and shit. They're so funny smellin'.


By Cat on Wednesday, July 25, 2001 - 05:56 pm:

    Your dates get all wet and shit?

    Kinkee Babeee


By patrick on Wednesday, July 25, 2001 - 05:56 pm:

    yeah thats a quick way to kill an erection thats for damn sure.

    i think Robin Williams said that in the great improv Live at the Met. Something to the effect of, the greatest birthcontrol: laugh at his monster.


By Nate on Wednesday, July 25, 2001 - 08:10 pm:

    LL Cool J To Star In Remake Of 'Dolemite'

    Rapper-actor LL Cool J has reportedly just made a deal to star in and executive produce the Dimension Films remake of Dolemite, the 1975 cult classic that starred Rudy Ray Moore in the title role. The remake is expected to loosely follow the original, with LL Cool J playing a flashy nightclub owner who exacts revenge on the rival who helped send him to prison on trumped-up drug charges.


By droopy on Wednesday, July 25, 2001 - 08:33 pm:

    the secret to dolemite's success?

    every day he took his penis aside and said: "you are a mighty unicorn."

    i am listening to john lee hooker.
    "my bumblebee's got a sting as long as my arm."
    his music is a mighty unicorn.

    and i am mighty drunk.


By semillama on Thursday, July 26, 2001 - 08:54 am:

    There is no way in hell you could every improve on the original Dolemite.


By Nate on Thursday, July 26, 2001 - 11:21 am:

    ll cool j is not rudy ray moore


By patrick on Thursday, July 26, 2001 - 11:39 am:

    thats messed up.


    the thing is, Ruday Ray More is still alive and well. In fact he sings in a funk band, they play around here from time to time.

    they can't even wait for the O.G. to croak.

    Im still waiting to hear about the Iceberg Slim movie.


By Spider on Thursday, July 26, 2001 - 11:42 am:

    I heard Rudy Ray Moore on the radio talking about the success of the Dolemite legacy. He attributed it to the fact that he *is* Dolemite. Like, that's him. It's real.


By semillama on Thursday, July 26, 2001 - 12:19 pm:

    It IS real. There can be only one.

    That gave me an idea for a blaxploitation remake of Highlander with Dolemite in the main role.


By heather on Thursday, July 26, 2001 - 12:36 pm:

    this thread needs another little boy penis story.

    so i told g your story. this is her's:


    her ex-boyfriend's cousin had a boy who was so large that even as a baby his mother was embarrassed to change him in public.
    they were at toys-r-us one day when he was seven and she turned around to find him standing against the store window. moving kind of funny.
    she walked up to find that he was rubbing his penis, [yes his pants were open] on the cool glass in full view of anyone outside the front of the store.


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