There is always a reason to be cheerful. Look around you right now. You can easily find something in any situation to give you reason to smile.

Are you gonna share those drugs?

*giggle!* Hey -- Prozac *will* brighten yr days!

the sun is shining and there is plenty of good water in the cooler. I did a web search on my last name and found some sort of cousin of mine (our great-great-etc.-grandfathers were siblings who were born in the late 1700s). he lives in bogota, colombia, and emailed me back. the mousetraps are working, even though you can't buy peanut butter in this country. I just bought about six meters of linen and I'm going to have a dressmaker make me lots of summer clothes. just got back from a debauched weekend in paris, and my next-up plane ticket, for next month, says "barcelona." it's my birthday and my coworkers just gave me a red tulips, one for every year old I am. so it's a huge, beautiful bouquet.

Happy birthday! Wish I could email peanut butter to you.

happy birthday, aries child! i wish to hell i could send you some of this leftover cake...

you are both very nice. another reason to be cheerful. today is also the birthday of queen elizabeth II, who is also away from home. the people in some little korean village prepared her a huge birthday feast, with something like 47 dishes traditionally given to monarchs. she didn't even taste any of it. but she's in her 70s. I guess she can be excused. here in ukraine I had pilmeny, compot, bulichka c masom, karl marx chocolate and sovietskoe champanskoe. (but later I ordered pizza.) I think finding that long-lost relative may become a reason to not be cheerful. he invited me to stay with his family in colombia, which I read in the paper yesterday is the country where you are most likely to be abducted. by far, the article said. I wonder if it would be rude for me to decline the invitation because tengo peor.

Fear is always legitimate. Tell him to come visit YOU.

tell him you don't have the money.

Fear not Cyst -- they only abduct the rich in Columbia. It's all business & the abductees are rarely harmed -- just like in Italy. No different than catching cab. (And the payoff figure is always negotiable.) But do correspond for a bit & exchange some phone chat before buying that plane tkt. M'kay?

I promise not to run off to columbia to meet some guy just because our branches of the family tree were one and the same back in deventer, the netherlands, in 1824. I don't think I want to rush into signing up for latin american-style familial obligations, either. god, what have I gotten myself into? me and the fucking internet. jesus.

sheeeeit. i got abducted in columbia all last weekend hanging out on the lower east. i highly recommend it.

Ingore Swine. He speaks 3 languages & probably negotioated his ransom in barrels of Patron. Plus I'll bet he had more coke on him than his kidnappers! Swine is like James Bond: Too many gadgets & always working an angle.

Like James Bond? What you mean misogynist repressed homosexual?

ooh yeah, baggy-poo. you look mighty sexy when you strut around like that. how 'bout i bend you over and take you for a ride? maybe later on we can paint you up in fuchsia and make you squeal like a pig. i need a manly man like yourself to beat the woman out of me.

Best offer I've had in MONTHS. Where shall we meet - be gentle mind you.

how about The Vault? mid 20's off of 10th ave. you dress up in black leather and fishnet stalkings and i'll walk you around on a leash. i bet you'd be perfect for the golden shower cage.

fishnet stalkings? Are those like really obsessed pantyhose???? Can you Freudian type?

somehow i doubt you're my freudian type. but i know some christopher st. boys who'd probably kill to tie you up and feed you some hot lunch love. ever munch on a poop-chute?

Are they like snickers bars or something?

god. the email from my distant cousin in colombia is getting insistent. or maybe it just sounds insistent because he writes in all caps (as justification for not using diacriticals?). examples (we both have the initials JVA): ME INTERESA MUCHISISISISISMO Y ME ENCANTE QUE ME ESCRIBAS, ... QUE HACE TU FAMILIA?? ESCRIBEME!!!!!! JVA HOLA JVA, MI DIRECCION ES: ... NO OLVIDES ESCRIBIRME PRONTO. JVA HOLA JVA, POR QUE NO ME CONTESTAS???? ESTAS BIEN????? ME PREOCUPAS, POR LO DE LA GUERRA DE KOSOVO, ESTAS CERCA???? ESCRIBEME!!!!!!! SALUDOS JVA ESO ES SOLO MALA FAMA, COLOMBIA ES UN PAIS MUY HERMOSO. BOGOTA ES UNA CIUDAD DE 10.000.000 MILLONES DE HABITANTES, CON LA INSEGURIDAD DE CUALQUIER GRAN CIUDAD COMO NY. DEBES VENIR PARA QUE CAMBIES DE OPINION; NO OLVIDES ENVIAR TU DIRECCION PARA ENVIARTE FOTOGRAFIAS DE COLOMBIA Y MI FAMILIA. COMO ES KIEV??? SALUDOS JVA Subject: CONFIRMACION!!!! Date: Wed, 12 May 1999 14:08:15 -0500 RECIBISTE MI ULTIMO MAIL?????? ME RESPONDES, POR FAVOR!!!! SALUDOS JVA

this guy sounds like a freak. be very afraid, girlfriend.

yeah, he does sound like a freak, doesn't he? oh well. he only has my work email address, and I'm leaving next month. speaking of, I guess I should be cheerful that the job interview process is now over for my latest attempt at gainful employment. I am in that hazy post-job interview depression. at least it was just a phone interview. at least I didn't spend $10 on a pair of nylons for this. what are you supposed to say when asked, "are you a self-starter?" I mean, the answer is obvious. I guess you are supposed to be quick with an example of a situation in which you didn't need to be prodded to work. god. I said, "yes." hahahahahaha. it was a long-distance call, so we couldn't both speak at once. and I asked my questions throughout the 50-minute talk. so at the end, when he asked if I had any questions, all the questions I'd written down I'd already asked. but after an hour on the phone, what more is there left to say? is there anything worse than trying to sell yourself to a potential employer? promoting the product? moving is the second-worst thing, but it's a long way behind. and if I get the job, I will have to move. and if I don't, I will get to embark on my fuck-across-europe summer '99 tour. so what am I worried about. ok.