the ambulatory


sorabji.com: Reasons to be cheerful: the ambulatory
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By droopy on Saturday, April 21, 2001 - 12:00 pm:

    i'm always hearing women complain about how men stare at their breasts. well, people stare at me 'cause i'm in a wheelchair. it's not like i go apeshit about it.

    however

    there's one thing that just kills me every time this happens - meaning that i think it's funny. here is some advice: if, one day, you happen to see a person in a wheelchair (could be a she, but let's say it's a he) getting out of his car, do not stare at him like a roadside attraction while he

    removes the wheelchair frame from the back seat of the car
    puts it on the ground
    puts on both wheels
    locks the backrest in place
    puts the chair in the upright position
    puts on the seat cushion
    gets into the chair

    and then walk up to the wheelchair guy and say

    "do you need any help?"

    it makes you look like an idiot.


By agatha on Saturday, April 21, 2001 - 01:00 pm:

    I'm so happy right now that I've never done that. I sometimes offer to help carry stuff for people in wheelchairs, but I wonder if that is annoying for them as well.


By sarah on Saturday, April 21, 2001 - 02:02 pm:


    what did you say in response?




By droop on Saturday, April 21, 2001 - 03:32 pm:

    i just said something like: "i'm fine. thanks anyway." it was no big deal.

    the above story happened at the grocery store this morning. as i was getting out of my car a guy with a bag of groceries stopped to watch me. he was about 55 with a big pot belly, wearing an old guayabera shirt, old pair of shorts, dirty sneakers, and a gimme cap. he seemed fascinated by the whole process. he also seemed a little confused; you could tell he was waiting for a chance to go over and offer some help, but i was doing everything in rapid succession.

    he looked to be disappointed when i didn't have anything he could help me with.

    it was just a funny, at least to me, little tableau.


By Bobby on Sunday, April 22, 2001 - 12:05 am:

    Is that worse than the people that refuse to even look at you, won't acknowledge your presence.

    One day, and one day only, when I had a broken ankle, I opted to rent a wheelchair at the state fair instead wielding crutches all day. What a humbling experience. I had more respect for the little children that would point and stare at me while tugging their mother's sleeve and asking "mommy, mommy, what's wrong with that man" than I did for all the "adults" who felt too awkward around the chair to even make eye contact, to accept me as part of their perfect world.

    But, I'm not telling you something you don't already know.

    So, in the above scenario, maybe I would offer to help you with your chair, maybe I wouldn't, but at least you'd get a "hello" from me.


By agatha on Sunday, April 22, 2001 - 11:53 am:

    yeah. people are truly freaks.

    one of my favorite customers at my last job was this writer, he had these hands that looked like pincers fashioned out of metal and he was in this hi-tech wheelchair. he was a writer with no hands, amazing. he was also one of the nicest customers i had there, and he had every right to be nasty. people who had everything going for them would come in and treat me like a nonperson, while someone who actually had something to complain about was just incredibly nice all the time. it blows my mind to think about it.


By sarah on Sunday, April 22, 2001 - 01:48 pm:


    i just had a memory of something from my childhood. when i was in 4th grade, there was a new student in my school who had lost his thumb in an accident. i can't remember how it happened, i'm sure it was all speculation. i'm not sure if people teased him, but he was definitely a curiosity and mostly outcast, perhaps because of the missing thumb in addition to being a new student.

    anyway, our 4th grade teacher made us tape both of our thumbs down to the palms of our hands for a day. it was a good lesson. have you ever tried that? life with no thumbs is a pain in the ass. after that we weren't as timid or freaked out about the new kid with no thumb.



    obviously not the same thing, but whatever.




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