bus talk


sorabji.com: Reasons to be cheerful: bus talk
THIS IS A READ-ONLY ARCHIVE FROM THE SORABJI.COM MESSAGE BOARDS (1995-2016).

By droopy on Thursday, December 22, 2005 - 12:54 am:

    interesting day on the bus. on my way to work, there was a comical problem with some blind people on the bus. but that's boring.

    on the way home we picked up a couple of guys who apparently knew the driver. they started talking about sex. it was great. their ages ranges in the 50's and 60's.

    "man, you're too old for young women!"

    "not if you think young!"

    "not if they sell viagra!"

    "viagra!"

    "they say if have a hard-on for more than 4 hours, yer supposed to call a doctor! i ain't never heard of anyone with a 4-hour hard-on!"

    "a guy told me he had a six-hour hard-on, once."

    "bullshit! I mean, maybe back when i was younger. when i took all them drugs and chased 'em down with booze. what do i know? maybe i did. but not now."

    "i'm worth about 3 minutes, these days. maybe five."

    "i tell women: 'look you want more than that, find a younger man.' i'm just her to get off, ya know?"

    "ha! ya know what someone told me last week? he said 'man, i did it 62 times last night!' i said ' man, you didn't do it no 62 times!' he said 'i sure did! i put it in and counted 1!...2!...3!...' hee hee! he was countin' each poke!"


    i love the bus.


By moonit on Friday, December 23, 2005 - 01:27 am:

    hee. Thats way more exciting than my bus ride this morning.

    Wait I didn't catch the bus today. hmm. Explains a lot really.

    I like wine. Andy bought me a bottle of tequila. Wheeee


By V on Saturday, December 24, 2005 - 12:47 am:

    moonit,is v,my poison is Sherry,you need to try....or if you have a real bad day,Polish vodka,blows your head clean off.


By droopy on Saturday, December 24, 2005 - 01:01 am:

    we make vodka in texas, now: tito's vodka. sounds frightening, but apparently it's pretty good.


By moonit on Saturday, December 24, 2005 - 07:08 pm:

    we make 48 below vodka.

    Sherry is an old lady drink V.


By V on Wednesday, December 28, 2005 - 11:29 pm:

    moonit,is not an old lady drink,if you do about 2 or 3 litres,it will blow your head clean off,try it,,,look,moonit,if it can wreck my liver,it can wreck yours.


By V on Wednesday, December 28, 2005 - 11:36 pm:

    moonit,how can I put this to you? sherry,its sweet,yummy,and can send you diabetic,so it must be good.


By V on Thursday, December 29, 2005 - 12:01 am:

    droopy,can you tell me more of "Titos Vodka",,,we cant get it in London,also,is it over 40%? ,,,in London most vodka is "Smirnoff",a copy of an old Russian brand.,is o.k. but to give all credit due,THE POLISH invented vodka,so we must all give the Polish credit for this,da?


By droopy on Thursday, February 1, 2007 - 12:29 am:

    i take the 2:15 from downtown to the southside. at the stop in front of the courthouse a young, african-american guy gets on. he has a pint of beer wrapped in a paper bag. the bus driver warns him not to drink it on the bus. the guy sits down across to me and starts talking to everyone in general

    "hey, i'm hated; that's the way it is. i'll be hated today and i'll be hated tomorrow and there's nothin' i can do about it. the dove flies on monday, the hawk flies on wednesday, the eagle flies on friday and on sunday the vulture comes and picks all their bones clean."

    he gets off a couple of stops on and i go on to work.

    i get off work. it's late; it's dark. i wait for the bus. as i wait, an old guy joins me. he is white, looks about 70. he's small, thin, scruffy, craggy, and, despite the fact that it's 37°, all he's wearing is a denim jacket. when the bus comes, and i'm following him on, i notice that there's something written on the back of his jacket, like it's written in pencil:

    i'm honest
    i'm trusted
    i'm insured
    i'm from montana

    on the bus he sits across from me. he has what looks like a small cardboard container that he has flattened out. i watch him as,with a ball point pen, he writes on every available space:

    senior from montana

    i care for my fellow man
    no drugs
    no rape

    no government [something]


    he asks to get off when we get to a denny's.


By Dr Pepper on Thursday, February 1, 2007 - 02:19 am:

    droopy, I have notice about the guy sit next to the curb next to the stoplight, he been doing for couple of years, do you think he is either homeless or just making money out from people? I have seen one guy from other town, after half of day with cardboard, then he hop in the taxi. I was kind of puzzled in my mind.


By Spider on Saturday, February 3, 2007 - 03:19 pm:

    There's no folk like Montana folk.
    the dove flies on monday, the hawk flies on wednesday, the eagle flies on friday and on sunday the vulture comes and picks all their bones clean.
    That's downright poetic.


By Spider on Saturday, February 3, 2007 - 03:24 pm:

    Did I ever recount the conversation I was able to overhear when I took an overnight bus from Billings to Spokane two years ago? This 50-something trucker from South Dakota sat next to this 30-something junkie on his way to rehab in Spokane, and they had the most fascinating conversation I have ever been blessed to hear. It lasted for hours and it was awesome.

    I wrote down what they talked about in my journal, which was fortunate, because now I can barely remember the points they covered. Except that the land around Libby, MT is beautiful but poisoned by the cyanide leeching from the mines, it's better to be eaten by a polar bear than a pack of wolves, and dying's easy -- living's the hard part.


By droop on Saturday, February 3, 2007 - 04:21 pm:

    actually, i couldn't quite remember what the downright poetic guy said, exactly. i didn't quite catch what he said until he got to the eagle part ("eagle flies on friday" is an old expression that appears in the t-bone walker song "stormy monday"; it means "payday".) i'm pretty sure a couple references to birds preceded it, and i distinctly remember that he ended with a vulture; but whether he said "pick their bones clean" or not i'm not quite sure. but it sounded good and i just wanted to record it. my memory is so bad these days. i remember the monatna guy's stuff because i repeated it to myself over and over until i could write it down on the back of a bus schedule. i need to carry a notebook around.


By Dr Pepper on Saturday, February 3, 2007 - 06:51 pm:

    Spider. Montana's too cold in the wintertime.
    Droopy, next time, carry a notebook in handy, try to pretend you can write it down like a reporter, my mom , she know "shorthand writing".


By TBone on Monday, February 5, 2007 - 07:29 pm:

    I'm in Montana. It's 63 degrees and sunny. My mind revolts and I can't do my work.


By Dr Pepper on Tuesday, February 6, 2007 - 01:55 am:

    TBone, 63 degree on Febuary 5 th ,2007? are you crazy?


By TBone on Tuesday, February 6, 2007 - 07:14 pm:

    No. Look it up, dude. Here's a zip code: 59601


By TBone on Tuesday, February 6, 2007 - 07:21 pm:


By semillama on Wednesday, February 7, 2007 - 03:21 pm:

    it's a little chillier today, though.


By Spider on Wednesday, February 7, 2007 - 04:50 pm:

    It's in the teens here (Boston) -- the other night it was 12 degrees with a steady ~20 mph wind blowing as I walked home from class.

    TBone, has it dropped below 0 yet this season?

    Where I lived in SE Montana, it could be -30 for a few days and then in the 60s by the end of the week. Usually, though, the weather was no worse than it is in Boston.


By TBone on Thursday, February 8, 2007 - 02:09 pm:

    Monday's chinook made for a nice walk to work, but it didn't even manage to melt all the ice buildup.
    It's been below 0 quite a bit this season. I'm not totally sure what's normal for Helena, though. I was spoiled in the warm little Missoula valley.

    However, I get to see the sun in the winter months now.

    It's snowing but good right now. It'll be good for cross-country skiing this weekend.


By Dr Pepper on Thursday, February 8, 2007 - 08:38 pm:

    Speaking of colder temperature, my car won't start, i had to call the shop to get my car towed and do some diagnosis. they said my carburetor flooded? impossible, it is E.F.I things and it won't possible flooded?


By droopy on Friday, February 9, 2007 - 03:18 am:

    don't let me forget a woman i met at the #11 stop this afternoon.


By agatha on Friday, February 9, 2007 - 11:42 pm:

    DON'T FORGET THE WOMAN AT THE NUMBER ELEVEN STOP. THANK YOU.


By droopy on Sunday, February 11, 2007 - 05:47 pm:

    the woman at number 11: it was a woman i've seen around town before. i thought she was homeless, but she must live in one of those houses past the train track, across from the pet food factory. she was trudging up the hill toward me. as she got closer, i recognized her by the big, knitted hat she always wore that looked the kind a rastafarian wears. it was about the size of a grocery bag, faded purple in color, and fastened at the hairline by bobby pins; i've seen her wearing it in summer in 100 degree weather. the big, faded maroon coat she was wearing billowed out at the sides like a pup tent. she joined me at the bus stop and we exchanged greetings. up close, she looked about mid to late 50's; she had a wrinkled and almost leathery look to her, but you could tell that she was once very pretty. she put down the black trash bag she was carrying - which she was obviously using like a purse; it was about 1/8 full of stuff and tied at the top - and started rifling through her pockets, pulling out bits of tissue. she smiled at me: "it's this weather; i've got the sniffles. but at least it's not blood, so that's good." she also had the good fortune to find a cotton glove she thought she'd lost.

    we chatted for a little while; there were only five or ten minutes till the bus was scheduled to arrive. she was intelligent and articulate as she spoke. she had a few opinions on the politics of water usage and conservation; i won't bore you with the details. despite her outward appearance, she obviously has an active and purposeful mind.

    the bus came and we got on. she sat with a woman she knew and they talked. i heard the other woman ask her how long her hair was these days: "down to my waist."


By Dr Pepper on Sunday, February 11, 2007 - 10:18 pm:

    Droopy, alot of Amish women do not cut their hair, that is wny they wore bonnet kind of thing to hold their hair. It is a tradional things to do, how ever for men, you do not grow mustache, but you can grow your beard if you are married.
    Unfortuneatly, the Amish do not ride city bus, they shun them. Ha Ha


By heather on Sunday, February 11, 2007 - 11:08 pm:

    ha ha!

    fuck you, city bus! take that!


By droopy on Sunday, February 11, 2007 - 11:37 pm:

    hmm. we don't amish in texas, as far as i know, but we do have lots of mennonites. i did a search and found that, in the past, mennonite women did not cut their hair (based on one sentence in "corinthians"). only conservative mennonites do it now.

    or maybe she just has a hair fetish. if i see her again, i'll ask.


By Dr Pepper on Monday, February 12, 2007 - 03:05 am:

    Heather, Ha Ha, uhmm, I don't like city bus, germs are all over..
    Droopy, Mennonite are similar to Amish. and I remember someone mentioned to me that he tought Amish drove the car, however I asked him about where he saw it, he Mentioned in western Illinois, so I drove for like two hours, and the detail are very skeptic at that times, his direction was correct on where I was driving. He misunderstood from what I saw: Amish and Mennonite are similar, see, Meonnonite can drive a cars and it was Sunday in their neighbor district, They parked couple of black car, no matter what kind of cars they are driving, as long it is black cars.They parked the cars in front of house, I believe it is church. this is Menonnite, not Amish, and yes they wore the traditional clothes and straw hat or bonnet. by that timeI looked at the other side of road. A menonnite riding on a tractor laughed at me? When I came back to work on the next following day and told him it was Menonnite, not Amish. it was close. I am not sure if I can be a friend with them, but I had rather back off on these people. I really don't want have anything to with them.


By Dr Pepper on Monday, February 12, 2007 - 03:09 am:

    Oh Droopy, sorry, Amish do not lives in big city, yes they shun modern stuffs and shits.


By droopy on Monday, February 12, 2007 - 03:28 am:

    i've been to amish country in pennsylvania and i once worked with a mennonite girl (who drove a car) here in fort worth. i know the difference between the two.


By heather on Monday, February 12, 2007 - 04:39 am:

    no you don't droopy!

    admit it!

    i think you should know i am currently watching "even dwarfs started small"


By Dr Pepper on Tuesday, February 13, 2007 - 02:19 am:

    Droopy, here is what I found on the website.
    Amish:
    Shit is good for the soil.
    This modern shit is worthless
    If you want a complete "Shit Happens" in various religion, I can sent you a list.


By patrick on Tuesday, February 13, 2007 - 04:05 pm:

    yopu havent rode a city bus until you ride the 333 from bowels of downtown LA to the land of beach gypsies called Venice. It takes upwards of an hour and a half to go 14 miles.


By patrick on Tuesday, February 13, 2007 - 04:05 pm:

    yopu havent rode a city bus until you ride the 333 from bowels of downtown LA to the land of beach gypsies called Venice. It takes upwards of an hour and a half to go 14 miles.


By V on Wednesday, February 14, 2007 - 12:57 am:

    Yes,you made your point.


By V on Wednesday, February 14, 2007 - 01:14 am:

    monit,sherry and port happen to be a superb drink,but as we all know,Jack Danials is the drink of Rock Stars.,v happens to have one close to hand,smoky,slurpy,awesome.


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