I am eating a ripe cunt. It's delicious.

Come on, do you realy expect us to believe you could be eating a cunt while cruising the internet? I think that you should be paying more attention to one of those activities. Just remember ol' Rev. semillama's sage advice: "When in doubt, eat pussy."

it seems as though that would be totally impossible, but yet fun to try!

This J+2 is not me,I just want to make that clear.

"Ripe" is not exactly the word I would use to describe any cunt I would be exited about doing anything with, let alone eat! "Ripe" is better used to desribe a *really* *nasty* fart. "Wow! THAT was RIPE!!!" Of course, if an old bag is YOUR bag, then have at it Je

(clap clap) Don't you people have work to do?????

Nope, we're all eating ripe, delicious, juicy cunts, and posting our feelings while doing so. Don't mind the maggots.

Speak for yourself Dougie,all I ate today was a half a cantalope.

i almost ate my heart out

Half a cantaloupe? What kind of lunch is that? Must have mucus and fur for lunch.

Maybe if your a cat.

you can get salmanilla from cantaloupe.

No way, salmonella from cantaloupe? I know people who are allergic to the mold that grows on the skin. I love all melons -- they keep putting out new kinds I've never seen before at the grocery, presumably from South America. Honeydews rule.

My cat is chewing on my toe. But I am not eating anything. I haven't eaten in a while. I should do that. I keep forgetting to and then going to work and then...*poof* I haven't eaten in a day or two. And I haven't had genitalia in a while, let alone ripe.

I was enjoying this girl's "melon" the other day when she said, "Hey, that's where my dog was licking me..." Kind of makes you wonder...

i'm eating another beer and listening to the rain outside. dinner was 2 pork chops and canned corn. lightning. thunder. supposed to rain all night. one of my kitchen cabinets has 5 cans of vienna sausages, 3 cans of corn, 1 can of creamed corn chowder, 5 cans of soup, 5 things of nissan cup-o-noodles, 4 boxes of spaghetti, 1 jar of spaghetti sauce, 2 cans of hormel chili, and a thing of mazola cooking spray. i can't remember the other cabinets. it's raining hard as ass.

Hey,I had a pork chop too.A big old shake and bake with the potatoes with cheese,it was all good.It was in the 100,s today and it,s only May,I hope I,m not gnawing ropes by Septemember.

I like pretty much every food I've ever tried except cantalope.

Cantalope is good Cyst,it,s supposed to prevent cancer,plus it,s mostly water.I drink alot of water because of all the booze I drink.it,s a yen yang thing.I hate yams,even rhough it goes against my southern roots.

Sorabji, I have to say that you make me laugh. Does anything get under your skin? .

the staples of my diet are tomatoes and broccoli. if I don't die in a car crash first, I'm going to succumb to cancer, I bet, but it's not going to have much to do with what I've eaten.

it is all in the hip-waist ratio. something like 19 people in the past something like a month or something have caught salmonilla from cantalope in the bay area. you need to wash your hands after handling the rind. even if you've washed the rind. always. period. because in nature cantaloupe are shat from giant birds.

Uh huh. Is "shat" truly the past tense of shit?

nate, you are special

It's salmonElla. You don't pronounce "vanilla" like "vanella," do you, by any chance, Nate?

Sam & Ella

I ate it and lived,but is that true Nate or are you just kidding,trying to give me another food phobia?

Guess so according to Merriam-Webster: Main Entry: shat past and past participle of SHIT

no, i pronounce salmonella like salmonilla though. eatass. http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/2000/05/24/MN47115.DTL

christ. I have fucking 40-inch hips. I did not need to objectively, quantitatively know that. I want 39-inch hips. that seems a lot smaller. 40-inch hips, 26-inch waist. 1.54 ratio. does that mean I'll live forever?

or, the other way around, 0.65. Stacey Martin and Boris Palameta. Psychology 1995 Male Perceptions of Female Attractiveness: The Importance of Waist-to-Hip Ratio Presented at the Human Behavior and Evolution Conference, June, 1995, Santa Barbara, CA ----------------------------------------------- Human males may have been selected to evaluate potential mates on the basis of cues that honestly advertise health and fertility. One such cue may be low waist-to-hip ratio (WHR). 77 male university students rated the attractiveness of female figures with WHR's ranging from approximately 0.65 - 0.80. The figures were derived from photographs of three volunteers from different weight categories (normal weight, overweight, and underweight). A computer program was used to darken the photographs and to manipulate WHR's. Six different figures were produced for each volunteer model. Each participant rated all six figures from one randomly selected weight category. Normal-weight and underweight figures were rated as more attractive when weight was removed from the waist rather than the hips; the reverse was true for overweight figures. Despite their lower WHR's, figures with enlarged hips were not rated as more attractive than figures with enlarged waists. The importance of WHR as a criterion of mate choice may vary with local conditions.

i found a deck of naked lady playing cards in a honeydew patch in tampa. i get salmonella from grocery store salmon once. i ate the fish, then took the A train to the World Trade Center, where i thought i was going to die. now i have the hiccups. goddamit. holding my breath. not breathing, purging the hiccups. i can hear the upstairs neighbor moving things around, the cars whizzing past. now i'm yawning. now i'm breathing normal. i feel like belching. i need a glass of water, and a bowel movement. got rid of the hiccups.

you people have to stop saying salmonella. you say salmonella, I see semillama.

hey semillama... wanna come to hawaii?

oh crapola. he's on vacation already. wah.

9 out of 10 people get rid of the hiccups by eating a spoonful of sugar.

Yeah, and the other 1 out of 10 persons has to eat 9 spoonfuls of sugar

I'd like to come to Hawaii. But I guess I'm not sem. Damn. I get rid of hiccups by focusing intently on something else. Unless they become painful. Which happens.

If someone wants to pay for my flight, I'll go anywhere. I am considering going back out to the Pacific Northwest around the 4th of July, visit some old friends there, maybe get another tattoo. Where I'll be depends on if my best friend will still be in Portland. If I go, I will probably start out in Seattle and then maybe go down to Portland, then back to Wisconsin, hopefully with some new ink. If I do go to Portland, I can be found somewhere in Powell's Books. Or, you-all can just go to Albequirky Oct. 21. I'll be there, and I will be disappointed if there is a low Sorabjite turnout. Margret will be busy, and I'm going to need at least one other sorbjite to hang out with and enjoy the scenery.

we should meet up in portland or seattle, sem. let me know when you know what your plans are.

what sorabji? no denty moore beef stew?

well, it's abad time for those friends, and I think my Portland lpals are all moving out of the city soon. ( I am really fucking hating this computer now - it has spontaneously reset itslef again!) So, i think I may go to Detroit, instead.

sem i'll buy you a ticket to portland