today I ate...

sorabji.com: What are you eating?: today I ate...
THIS IS A READ-ONLY ARCHIVE FROM THE SORABJI.COM MESSAGE BOARDS (1995-2016).
By Jeffrey Scott Holland on Sunday, March 8, 1998 - 11:22 pm:
    Breakfast: Pancakes and Syrup, Bacon, Chocolate milk.
    Lunch: Angel Hair spaghetti with swiss and parmesan cheese, Coke.
    Dinner: Fried Potatoes, V8.
    Late-night snack: bowl of Rice Krispies.
    Intermittently thru the day: Reese's Pieces Easter Eggs, Gummi Bunnies, Beer Cheese, Frappucino, and lots of bottled water.
By Spiracle on Monday, March 9, 1998 - 05:52 pm:
    breakfast..didn't have time
    lunch..toasted cheese and pastrami sandwich, bannana and a few bites of butterscotch pudding..
    dinner..haven't gotten that far yet..

    what's beer cheese?
By Jeffrey Scott Holland on Monday, March 9, 1998 - 09:55 pm:
    what's beer cheese??? WHAT'S BEER CHEESE??? Quickly lad, get thee to a cheesery! I can't believe you're not hip to nature's most perfect food!! (and you thought it was tofu.) Beer cheese is a Kentucky specialty.....cheddar cheese made with hot pepper, garlic, and lots of beer in it. Has a creamy spread-like consistency. Heavenly. The best offered commercially was at Johnny Allman's but it burned down. Now you have to settle for the close contender, Hall's Beer Cheese. Other brands of note include Southern Salads and Butcher Block. My own homemade beer cheese, however, rocks most righteously, as I often make it with Guinness.


    And today I ate:

    Breakfast - nothing. Except some Reese's candy eggs.
    Lunch - Angel Hair with Swiss and Parmesan. V8.
    Dinner - Fish and french fries.
    ...and probably a bowl of cereal later for a snack. Snacked on dry cereal out of the box in the afternoon, too.
By N on Tuesday, March 10, 1998 - 12:28 am:
    my only regret is the quantity of crab/artichoke dip.
By R.C. on Tuesday, March 10, 1998 - 01:19 am:
    Oohhhh NO, JSH! Now you GOTTA post yr recipe for making Beer Cheese here! I can't make any kind of cheese from scratch -- much less one with beer. (Do you use goat's milk or some other hard-to-get stuff like that?)
By Christopher on Tuesday, March 10, 1998 - 01:02 pm:
    Yes JSH. If I can post my meatballs and sauce recipe, the least you can do is share the beercheese.

    Which brings up a nasty memory for some reason. When I was a teen, I worked in a deli. In the meat case we had that wonderful stuff called "Head Cheese", which is stuff like pig snout and knuckles and feet all encased in a gelatinous aspic. No one ever bought it, except for this little old lady, about 85. The first time she came in while I was working she asked me "Is that Head Cheese fresh?". Since it had been there since I started 3 weeks prior, I told her that it really wasn't. She responded"Oh! I'll take a pound , then.". Brrrrrrr....
By Markus on Tuesday, March 10, 1998 - 02:43 pm:
    That was one of my horrid discoveries about Southern edibles when I worked as a deli guy as well. The other one was scrapple.
By Jeffrey Scott Holland on Tuesday, March 10, 1998 - 04:16 pm:
    I'm not a measuring cup type of guy, so the recipe is fairly subjective: I melt cheddar cheese in a pan, add a little Cayenne Red Pepper, a lot of garlic, and a lot of beer. melt 'em all together, and refrigerate. Some commercially bought Beer Cheese is a bit runny, like a dip, but I prefer to keep the cheese-to-beer ratio at a consistency thick enough that a cracker might break if you dipped with it; A light-bodied, dry beer is usually best, but I do really like it with Guinness, in which case I use hickory-smoked cheddar.
By Jeffrey Scott Holland on Tuesday, March 10, 1998 - 04:22 pm:
    Oh yeah - that was *powdered* Red Pepper, and Garlic *powder*, by the way. I suddenly had this vision of people dicing cloves of garlic and whole peppers and coming up with new chunky-style Beer Cheese....
By R.C. on Tuesday, March 10, 1998 - 11:28 pm:
    Awwww -- whadda ripoff! And I thought you were mixing curds & whey & antelope milk & secret spices together in big vats with renin & some obscure Yugoslavian lager & turning out these huge wheels of Beercheese that were aged to perfection before being served only to yr most discriminating guests. Pooh!
By Jeffrey Scott Holland on Wednesday, March 11, 1998 - 12:28 pm:
    Oh, you want the SECRET recipe, handed down by generations of the esoteric brotherhood of Cheesemasons...why didn't you say so?? Okay, here it is, just because I love you so much....

    1. Remove all clothing and cleanse the kitchen of evil influences with a smudge stick and a large rubber alligator. Do the Appalachian Voodoo Cheesemaking Chant, and draw the Appalachian Voodoo Cheesemaking Sigil on the floor in green chalk.

    2.. Prepare the milkbase formula : mix one gallon whole milk with two tablespoons of garlic juice and one tablespoon of kosher salt. If lactating, add 3 oz. human milk.

    3.. Pour the mixture into level cheese culture containers. Introduce a teaspoon of malt vinegar to each container, as well as one packet of lactobacillus. Do not use Rennet tablets or liquid Rennin.

    4. Refrigerate and curdle to suit, usually one or two days is sufficient. Upon removing the cultures from the fridge, solemnly make banjo noises with your mouth.

    5. Either with a professional separator or with a piece of cheesecloth stretched across a gallon container, separate the whey from the curds. Don't worry about draining every last drop of whey out, let a little remain.

    6. Add cornstarch to thicken to desired consistency.

    7. Add powdered Cayenne Red Pepper to taste, and a touch more garlic if desired. Add fresh urine if this cheese is for an Appalachian Voodoo Fertility Ritual, in which case you'd be doing it in a cave with a makeshift icebox anyway.

    8. Make a holy beer cheese offering to Appalachian Voodoo Gods such as Legba, Doraemon, and Emmett Miller. If you don't have a cemetary handy for this purpose, construct a simulated one in your back yard using cereal boxes as headstones.
By Jeffrey Scott Holland on Wednesday, March 11, 1998 - 12:34 pm:
    Yes, yes, "But what about the beer??", I hear you cry. That would be added in step 7 as well but I got sidetracked by the importance of urine. Beer cannot be added to the milkbase solution from the start, nor can the red pepper, due to an inhibiting chemical reaction, not to mention St.Gomer just plain tells us to not to do it in the holy scriptures.
By Christopher on Wednesday, March 11, 1998 - 03:16 pm:
    Shit! Now you tell us. I finished my batch of beercheese SANS beer about 2 hours ago and the whole damn thing got up and is running amok in downtown San Francisco destroying my "enemies". Maybe I shouldn't have quadrupled the recipe and shaped it like a giant ginger bread man, but I LOVE cheese. But enough for now, I have to figure out how to stop this cheese golum. Anybody got some saltines?
By Tucker on Sunday, March 15, 1998 - 01:50 am:
    everyone is required to like soy at my school. our soy burgerswon the award for being most unlink a burger of the whole state. we have soy tacos. whats worst is its not even real soy.......IT'S FAKE SOY! how bad can one thing be? then you can put soy cheese on the tacos and burger with soy sauce (salsa or tacos sause cause too much heartburn apparently). the soy milk washes everything down good. yum. the hair nets the lunch ladies wear are part soy to save money(food scraps). the walls don't have wall paper, but.....you guessed it......SOY SUBSTITUTE! like the wall if youre hungry and lose that appetite quick. the paint chips we used to have tasted better. soy desks, lights, teachers................FAKE soy. bad soy.
By Jeffrey Scott Holland on Sunday, March 15, 1998 - 06:43 pm:
    Soy Beer Cheese.....hmmmm....I like it. Hey, does anyone know the name of that Soy-obsessed performance artist who upstaged Dylan on the awards show? I wanna put him in a film.
By Markus on Tuesday, March 17, 1998 - 07:57 pm:
    Try this. He's from suburban Maryland, probably Bethesda, but lives in NYC now.
By Sarah on Tuesday, March 17, 1998 - 09:06 pm:
By Marti W. on Saturday, July 4, 1998 - 07:09 am:
    Ok, y'all ...re: Beer Cheese. You're RIGHT!! Johnny Allman's on the river DID make the best but we still have to settle for Hall's. (is that place STILL open?) I had a craving for this so I made some yesterday...grated the sharp cheddar and minced onion and REAL garlic (actually,almost pureed it). I couldn't find any cayenne so I used Tobasco. I found an old fashioned mashed potato masher-thingie and mixed with that. My finished product is now in a crock in the fridge. (It's yummy) I love your page :)
    Marti the misplaced Kentuckian living in Illinois
    7-4-98 HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY !!!!
By Kelsey on Saturday, July 4, 1998 - 02:49 pm:
    here's my beer cheese recipe:
    let me just add that all of my guests sneered last time i busted out the homemade beer cheese and my other specialty, homemade hot mustard over a brick of cream cheese, both served with crackers. by the end of the night, nary a morsel was left.

    beer cheese.

    ingredients:
    8 oz. hard white or yellow cheese (colby, monterey jack)
    8 oz. hard orange cheese (cheddar)
    half cup stout or porter beer
    half cup softened margarine or butter
    two cloves garlic, finely minced
    dash hot sauce
    three dashes each dill seeds and celery seeds
    two cups chopped walnuts (optional)
    fresh parsley or cilantro (optional)

    measure out beer, then pour the remaining beer into a glass and drink it as you work. grate the cheeses. in a large mixing bowl, cream together the cheeses, beer, and margarine/butter until it's a large mess, about the consistency of strawberry preserves. add the garlic, hot sauce, and seeds and mix with a spoon or rubber spatula. pack into crocks or coffee cups, top with walnuts and parsley/cilantro, and serve chilled. makes about four six ounce crocks, or four coffee cups. serve with whole grain crackers and apples.

    while we're at it, here's my mom's famous hot mustard recipe:
    ingredients:
    one cup dry mustard
    one cup cider vinegar
    two stirred eggs
    one cup of sugar

    mix dry mustard and cider vinegar, let sit refrigerated for several hours or overnight. put the mess into a double boiler, and add the two stirred eggs and the cup of sugar. cook over the boiling water for twenty minutes, stirring constantly, until the mixture is thick and shiny. serve over cream cheese with whole grain crackers.

    yum.
By Danny on Thursday, July 16, 1998 - 03:59 am:
    Today I ate several things:

    a Nutty-Buddy Bar
    Hot Rolls
    Macaroni and Cheese
    Beef!
    Navy Beans (woo-hoo)
    Potatoes
    Frosted Flakes

    (in that order)
By Carrie Ann on Thursday, July 16, 1998 - 09:26 pm:
    Bfast: Special K w/skim milk and strawberries, glass of Orange Juice
    Lunch: Vegetarian Pita sandwhich, mixed fruit bowl, bottled water
    Dinner: Grilled lemon/herb chicken, marinated arroz salad, pina coladas (Mmmmm!)
    Snax: Some frozen Grapes (take green grapes, put them in a bowl in the freezer and when they're frozen all the way through, take em out and eat 'em.. great for hot days - like today :p ugh and better for ya than popsicles/ice cream), dish of Hagen Daaz Zesty Lemon Sorbet


    I'm almost done packing! This heat is making it really hard to discipline myself and stay inside to pack though. Makes me wanna get nekkid and run around through the sprinkler. Course, I suppose that was a lil more acceptable when I was 3, rather than 20. ;p Hehe.
By Starchy on Friday, July 17, 1998 - 11:05 am:
    That all depends on where you live. Why, if you were to do that in my neighborhood... you'd probably be arrested, at best. Ah, well... c'est la vie.

    (Trying to pretend I'm not having similar urges... the air conditioning's out. Unfortunately, I'm also at work...)
By Carrie Ann on Friday, July 17, 1998 - 05:49 pm:
    Heh, and where might that be, Starchy?

    Actually I live in a neighborhood with a bunch of older people (50's - 80's) and at best I'd probably give 'em a lil wake up call. Heh.

    Well, they said it would get DOWN to the upper 80's today. No air conditioning, one fan, have to finish cleaning and packing... fun FUN fun!
By Quidam on Friday, July 17, 1998 - 06:37 pm:
    Freshly homemade Greek pasta salad.
    Vietnamese spring rolls.
    Pepsi.
By Starchy on Saturday, July 18, 1998 - 05:22 am:
    I live the only middle class neighborhood in the city of Boston. Not that I could be considered middle class... *grumble*
By Kuks314 on Friday, December 1, 2000 - 08:31 pm:

    does anyone have a recepie for cola?

By J on Saturday, December 2, 2000 - 04:49 am:

    Your kidding...right?

By sarah on Tuesday, October 21, 2008 - 09:55 pm:


    omgtlsw!






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