Gimme enough rope....'nuff sed?

Come on Pug,you got something to spill?

Moslem or Christian, Mullah or Pope, Preacher or poet who was it wrote 'Give any one species too much rope And they'll fuck it up' Roger Waters - Amused to Death

Have ye been hoist 'pon yer own petard? or have ye been moist over yer own retard?

...And the Monkey didn't get the joke.

That's cause all the monkeys with senses of humor are in New Dehli.

see?

Good God! Who trained that monkey?

damn it damn it damn it, when the HELL am I going to learn NOT TO HIT LINKS AT WORK!!!!

Hey, that wasn't remotely pornographic, buddy. I've been following the monkey problem inNew Delhi for a while. It's growing increasingly hilarious.

Ooops wrong link, I had dumped my browser so i could clean out my cache as soon as that other link popped in.....

I wonder if that monkey hires out?

I think I'll quit bitching about pigeons.

Gorillas eat monkeys for breakfast. THey have no regrets. Take no prisoners; leave no evidence.

i like gorillas. as for regrets, i regret that i didn't plan a b-day party for myself. less than a week left and i have work and an essay to write. i haven't eaten brekkast for a few weeks. there's no time to fix a real brekkast in the morning. just gimme a muffin and scrambled eggs and be done with it! bah. who's listening, anyway?

Speaking of gorillas, i never realized that Dian Fossey had it coming before.

of course she did. didn't you read gorillas in the mist? she had a vibrator. it was a given to her as a gift.

My birthday is on Monday. It may not be a rocker, but... who knows? Pez, give us the BoyFriend Report?

The gorrilla turns fifty One week from today. Ha.

Are you the gorilla?What do you want for your birthday?

ooh...i'm having the big 1-9. as for the boyfriend report, (maybe i'll have to do a newsletter or something...nah.) d's still around. i see him once or twice a week. and he doesn't like to hear about anthropology while making out. he's the "uncaring boyfriend" (his term, not mine) when i do that. i came up with a nickname for him, which has not reference to his height or looks. mowgli. a gorilla? me? no. though the odd banana is a highly enjoyable experience. as for ma b-day, i'd like a portable cd player so i could study away from home (i can't pay attention if i hear coughs, papers rustling, pencils, etc) or for my camera to stop hiding.

hrm. that's another january b-day. d's is on the 1st, my uncle mike has his around the 14th or so, my cousin jeff has his on the 18th (the same day as chissie g's, the little sister of a member of my sister's "group") uncle donnie on the 23rd, mine the 24th, a couple of old elementary school friends on the 25th, and an ex-boy on the 27th. whew. tom, are you working at the gresham library?

nope. Are they hiring? NEat. I might get this job doing tech support at Powells. everybody wish me luck. Speaking of Libraries, check this IP, so Trace will know I'm not a liar. Bitch. I waited 2 hours in the airport, ended up hitching into Lawrence, instead. Right. So now I'm at the Kansas University Computer Lab. It's really cold here in the middle. Someone should've warned me. Yeah, okay, you did warn me. still. I thought "it's really winter here," and it just didn't get through. 40 in Portland is too cold for me. single digits here. bleh. Right. That's the Kansas Report. Later, all. Pez: Consider. You just found a boyfriend, and you're posting things like "the odd banana is a highly enjoyable experience." hrm.

Sorry Trace stood you up, Tom. I'm sure he was just worried about his wife being jealous of the unspeakable passion between the two of you. But I was soooo looking forward to the wild whacky happy snaps of you and Trace grinning madly. It even sounds good doesn't it? Tom and Trace. Trace and Tom.

k i s s i n g. get the fuck out of kansas, you nitwit.

As long as you don't go to Nebraska. has anyone heard of the time warp on I-80 there? My friend at work was talking about it, like it's an hour's drive from like, i can't remember, let's say Lincoln to Buttface, but sometimes it takes two hours under the same driving conditions.

Shit. I did that drive at night once. From Cheyenne to Buttface, or thereabouts. I was coming back from a backpacking trip in Wyoming, most of us took the van back east. After dropping one of our leaders off at the Cheyenne airport, my friend Liesl and I traded off the driving through the night, and got pretty damn far across Nebraska. She told me stories for a couple of hours, to keep me awake and alert. After that, I pretty much slept until Scranton. Except, when we got off the highway in Indiana, ended up in Michigan. When we went to pull into a Mister Donut to change drivers, the militant feminist of the group said very sleepily from the back, "Can't we please stop at a non-gender specific donut shop?"

You have to be joking.

I can't let this go. So this woman would refuse, hypothetically, to eat at Tim Horton's, a donut shop named after a guy? Even thought that have teh best donuts in the universe, probably the same donuts God ate on the 7th day? I get along with a lot of different types of people, but those with no sense of proportion are not among them.

Ahem. She may have been a lesbian from Wesleyan, but she's got a sense of humor. Props to anyone who can crack a joke like that at two in the morning. Although most of us missed it until the light of day.

Deer Tracks (deer tracks) Beautiful, sobbing high-geared fucking and then to lie silently like deer tracks in the freshly-fallen snow beside the one you love. That's all. (brautigan)

breautifrul Brautigan. you are too much Cat. And J, I is the gorrilla. Have you ever spent time with them? I mean, not just Gorillas in the Mist time, I mean real time with them. My son and I spent two or three hours once at the Albuquerque zoological park (which isn't much but they have nice gorillas) ... watching and communicating with the old ones there. There's a huge contingent at the StL zoo, and even a lifesize bronze of a local gorilla who was so very friendly with folks here...that the whole city mourned his passing. The odd banana, Pez? somedays! Tom I warned you it would be cold here in the middle...hitched to Lawrence? A full report is expected. Hope your weekend was as magical as mine. There wasn't a lot of time. I leave for a week and look what happens. So...What do I want for my birthday? Red crystal clay, plant spirits, the small of someone's forearm around my neck, and ... more Brautigan. I already received more than I could hope for.

So i've been awake for the first 7 hours of my 22nd birthday. On the downside: no check from the lazy employers. I won't do freelance anymore. An overdue phonebill. a rejection notice saying I didn't get the job. I'm sick. No Trace. 22 doesn't mean shit. On the upside: I had 22 email messages waiting for me on my 22nd birthday, 1/22. Like Daniel SSSSaid: "It was a magical weekend." and "I already received more than I could hope for." I've now been in Phoenix and Las Vegas, if only the airports. I got to see a time warp, and danced on the side of the highway outside of Kansas City. My adopted mom called, probably not even knowing it was my birthday. A good looking job in the classifieds. So we'll see, huh? Yeah. I got a towel and pixie sticks and a mountain dew and bunches of fast food meals. Lemme see. the full report. I was already getting sick when I landed in MCI (which they call KCI, r some weird reason). Head throbbing, throat sore. No Trace. I got a ride into Lawrence with a girl I met at the airport. She was really sweet. We ate dinner at... Perkins? watched the first half of "Small Time Crooks." Went to bed. got up late. Saturday was a blur. I don't remember plenty of it. Ate at ... Runza? fast food. Hamburger and veggies baked inside a rollWe missed a play about unicorns and magic, got stood up by my friend in Witchita, went out drinking with her friend(it took us three tries to find a bar that wasn't at capacity), had minor issues, went home, dealt with issues, slept. Sunday: got up, ate at Sonic, met people I hope to get to know better, got caught in a time warp. (We went to a lake. The lake was frozen over. but the waves and ripples were frozen in place. Does that really happen? It was CRAZY.) Eventually, she drove me back to the airport. She pulled the car over, randomly, on the side of the highway, so that we could dance. I'm one of those stuffy people who doesn't really understand crying. It doesn't work for me. But I lost it on Saturday night, and she took care of me. I hate the idea of someone taking care of me. Standard abandonment issues. Good lord. I fell in love with her once every 5 minutes. She gave me a towel, and pixie sticks, and apologized profusely about not having a cake. Somehow, I didn't mind that little detail. and then I left. Flew back, and my head was still hurting, and my throat was still sore, and I had a little heartache, too. Got in at 3:30, but didn't get home until 6:45, thanks to public transportation. That was my weekend. Trace, you're forgiven, but I don't love you anymore.

Hey, I don't let arsonists in my car. Besides, it seems you found a nice lady... Happy belated birthday, Tom

Dancing. I need to go dancing. You think of everything?

What's on the radio, yo?

erk! i can't believe i wrote that! i was talking about bananas. not my boyfriend, who seems to be mia. i saw someone working in the library who could be tom, just w/ slightly different hair. for my b-day, i'd like to be able to stand without wiggling in ballet. that'd be pdc. on saturday, i want to go swing dancing, since i somehow managed to get the night off. but there's nothing at the crystal that's listed for the 27th. bah. if only i were going to be 21 rather than 19!

Zeitgiest: Thanks! THAT'S what I want next on this weirdest of Birthdays, besides employment or a million dollars. I want snow cones. With plastic forks. And a paper plate, of course. Crystal. mm.. I'm gonna go see Southern Culture on the skids, if I have any money by then. it's... feb 8, I think.