No regrets at all...well, maybe just 1 or 2..


sorabji.com: Do you have any regrets?: No regrets at all...well, maybe just 1 or 2..
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By Always His Danigirl on Friday, March 13, 1998 - 11:04 am:
    I dont regret any of things we said or did together. I regret that I wouldnt allow myself to look at him much. But then again I dont. My unwillingness to look into his eyes was my way of trying not to get to close to an impossible situation. Our relationship was like a dead end street. Could only go so far. Looking at it now after some time has gone by I realize that fact. I think I did then too but my determined side just thought that love could overcome any obstacles. Thats not true. When the actions you take could/would hurt innocent people, those actions must stop. I also regret the fact that I have lost probably the best friend I ever had. I was able to talk to him about anything. No one made me laugh as much as he did. No one ever made me feel so happy inside like he did. I miss him being a part of my life. Not only did I lose the love of my life, I lost a friend of a lifetime. I try and talk to him to let him know that its ok for us to communicate after everything that has happened but my efforts are useless. What I shared with him I will never regret or be sorry for. I would do again in a heartbeat. Yes I have some bitterness for him. Maybe because things didnt go the way I wanted them to go and because he didnt feel for me the way I wanted him to feel about me. But in the end, my memories of him are good ones. This poem is for him. One day, maybe he'll see it, maybe not. Dont really matter if he does or not. Just makes me feel good to get it out I guess.
    One Special Guy...

    The older, the wiser I get,
    There's one special guy I'll never forget
    the tears I shed, the memories held here,
    Are locked in my heart year after year
    I'll remember as the days go by,
    him I wanted to be my guy
    I'll remember the time he held me so tight,
    As we made Love under the moonlight
    You live for today and hope for tomorrow,
    praying that it's good and not touched with sorrow
    Remember the dreams and how long ago it seems
    Remember the tears I cried that night,
    As he tried to make me see the light
    I'll slowly get over the heart-broken pain,
    But I still cry when I hear his name
    And in my heart there's a special place,
    the memories, good times and his sweet face
    As I remember, the days will go by,
    But I'll never forget you were that one special guy.

    Sure seems and feels like years, thats for sure.


By Sugarbaby on Tuesday, March 17, 1998 - 12:24 am:
    Thats a very touching peom. It sounds like you went through alot! I think we all have those times when we go out with someone, and you think that that someone is "The One", you make up names for your future children, decide what kind of house to live in. Fantisize about comming home to him after a long day at work. And then something happens. You fall apart and everythings lost. And all your left with are the memories of the good times and bad.
    We all have those things happen to us, its called going up. At the time, when it happens, the world it seems is so unfair and cold. Nothing matters but this long lost person you cant stop thinking about. But time heals. Sound cheesy, but its true.
    And you know what, Id rather go through all that pain and frustration than to not go through it. It makes us all a little wiser, stronger and more aware of who we are. And in the long run, you know it was never ment to be anyway.

By Always his Danigirl on Tuesday, March 17, 1998 - 08:33 am:
    Yes, Time does heal all wounds. Some days the missing and the wanting and the aching for him are worse than others and I actually wish at times I would like get hit on the head or some shit and totally have that chapter of my life erased!! But we all know that wont happen so your stuck with it. It defidently was a learning experience for me, thats for sure. What I learned most was that loving someone was more work and hurt and aggravation then it was worth when deep down inside, I knew it really wasnt being fully returned. But hope has a nasty way of taking over your every thought when the big picture was right there in front of me all along. I'll always love him and my biggest wish in the world is that one day, he will find someone he can love so he can feel how incredible it is to love someone and have that love returned completly. Then again, maybe I dont wish that. Who knows.


By
Brian on Friday, November 17, 2000 - 06:45 am:

    IT's a paradox... where part of you wishes it never happened... and another part is thankful that it did. For the pain, you wish you didn't have but for the experience and for the words to write that poem you are thankful for.
    Maybe you wish he finds someone who he can love and loves him... that's not what hurts... what hurts is your wish to be that person... It's a small world... but I'd give it all up for one more day with Lynn....


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