i'm not sure if i've disclosed here that i have a personality disorder. one thing this means is that i am sensative to the way people perceive me. i read people, and fear that they won't accept me so i try to be what i think they want me to be. i was walking along thinking about my ex-boyfriend and cursing the fact that he has found new love in this woman who has the appearance of perfection. i was angry with myself for crying for being sad while i was with him. if only i hadn't cried. if i had been stronger... what... i would still be with him... pretending to be someone i wasn't. trying so hard to be the perfect girl, and failing so miserably. trying at least once a week to die because i could not be what i knew he wanted. who am i? i don't know. i've been being what you want me to be for so long. i told, once, the story of how i hated _the bell jar_. another reminder everyday when i post here of how i am nothing. a crazy girl. fed full of you, i vomit, i look around to see. has anyone seen this, you coming out of me? i try so hard to hide it, to keep it from the world. i am a mindless drone, nothing is my own.

A bowl is not useful unless it is empty. Become who you are.

On the other hand, a bowl that is incapable of holding anything isn't a bowl at all. Then again, who wants to be a bowl?

I have several old bowls i must try to re-fit in my future... So far, no massive buzes or headaches from sniffin' glue. I don't use it a lot anyway.

Hey, you fuckos, I wasn't joking!

i smoked a couple bowls last night?

and thinking about it, those bowls aren't useful if they are empty. they are used.

Damn, I remember smoking bowls. And when I was out of pot I'd scrape the resin out of the pipe and bong with a paper clip and smoke that. Now that's gotta be healthy for you. Seems like forever ago.

ahhh the college days, brokedickcar ....i was a master at scrapping, the great part about it, the resin almost recycles it self....after each resin bowl, you get more resin, i think i stayed high for weeks on end , on the resin of the resin of the resin

Speaking of resin, any Greeks out there? A long time ago, I had this really great wine, I think it was called Resinata, they put the resin from pine trees (I think) in the wine. It's very interesting. Anybody know it or drink it? Is it very common/popular in Greece? I'm going to look for it at my local booze purveyor.

Retsina. Hard to find good retsina in the US. The bad stuff'll blind you. Stick with ouzo. Only the Greeks, Turks, and me are crazy enough to drink retsina. And yes, it's from pine.

Thanks for the info Isolde

De rien.

Antigone: I wasn't joking, either. Let's go start a thread on Koans and whatnot. "Become who you are." You don't have a choice but to be who you are! Stick that in your pipe and smoke it.

Koans? "I YAM THAT I YAM" -JHVH-1 to Moses/Popeye