THIS IS A READ-ONLY ARCHIVE FROM THE SORABJI.COM MESSAGE BOARDS (1995-2016). |
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Thank you and have a nice fucking day. |
hahahaaa...... leave work at 2, to go back home for a walk-in clinic. Could have gone here, asked around "uhm, there's one down the street actually." "where?" "you don't want to go there." "huh?" "they don't speak english." fine driving home. Giving up quitting smoking. Too much bullshit, too fast. Need smoke. Have smoke. Have smoke and crazy mix cd. Have the Doors and Organised Rhyme. Blood and my love in the terrible summer....fuck yeah. I hate summer. I hated it as a child and i hate it even more now. Check the O.R., ya like is so far? home. Waiting. Waiting. Went to highschool with the receptionist. The hell is her name? Waiting. Waiting. Health Card. Form. Waiting. Doctor humour. Pee in a cup. Hillarity ensues. Hillarity quickly crashes and burns. "yes, you do indeed have a urinary track infection." (again) GOOD FUCKING GOD, WHEN WILL JUNE END AND STOP FUCKING WITH ME. JUST KILL ME. i take my Rx note. mmmmmm...more pills. Yes always more pills. i walk next door. i buy peaches. Canned peaches because i want them. Down the street is the pharmacy. Chicky is getting a makeover at the makeup counter. Looks me over. The great thing about looking this way is that no-one ever expects you to be happy, so me being in this foulest of moods confirms her. Fuck you fuck you SHEEP! ugly capri pants! My run in with the happiest pharmacist assistant in the land. I am quiet. He is flirty. Where do they keep those vitamins i used to take? should i take them again? it's been months. Buy an N*Sync birthday card for the sig.other. He'll hate it. Done, out, $40. Ten pills, $40. Ten big white pills. I look for a second at the condoms on sale. I shudder. It's all their fault, anyway. Cross the street, on a payphone. Mom is the only one around. Need to phone people, need to stay away from the car, the highway, the work, the desk. I can't go back there. I won't go back there. It's too too much. She comforts the much frazzled daughter. Take pills, buy drinks, love you sweetie, goodbye. How the fuck is anyone a mom. Grocery store. Drinks. Big drinks. 2-4 of iced tea. Wander. Not going back to work yet. Not like this. Next time around, web design is right up there with prostitution. Never again. Fuck you cranberry juice, you failed me. You all fucking failed me. Walking around looking at pita bread with the burning, hopeless kind of feeling you get when you keep getting shit thrown at you. Nature is a woman, nature is a giant fucking bitch. You take shit for a long time, then your own body decides to fuck you over. It happens every time. I leave. Perfect. Politician is standing with flock outside the store shaking hands. Big red Liberal party sign. Talk to me. Talk to me fucker. Talk to me today, of all days i dare you. I will hurt someone. "I don't vote. I'm a communist. Eat a dick." i wish. eat a fucking dick, oldy. Dirty delivery guys and a mail man. All will die. in car, on highway, back to the city. I will not work. I will type this out and fucking leave. This is me when i'm beyond angry. This is me after a bad day, bad week, bad month. Bad summer. Terrible summer. Expencive pills. I need a tuna sandwich like no other human has ever needed a tuna sandwich. Thank you and have a nice fucking day. |
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Woke up late for work this morning, don't quite know why either, I went to bed at a reasonable time, hadn't been drinking, I'd set all 3 alarms. Fuck I need to somehow rewire my alarm clock(s) in to one of those portable refillable airhorns. That way when they went off, it would either kill me, or wake me up either way I won't be sleeping. I think tonight I'm going down to the market to pick up some sake'. I'm in the mood to drink, but not at a bar, and NOT with any fucking people. Unless their in as much if not more of a shitty mood as I am, and we'll sit and watch bad movies and sit and bitch about the movies and then the world while drinking tiny cups of fine sake'. And sushi sounds good too, although again I'm too poor right now. Don't get paid till Friday. Guess this is the shit I'll have to deal with, after all I only get paid once a fucking month. The only upside to this month after all the shit thats happend is when its over I'm going to order the parts for my computer. For the last 4 or so months I've been forced to use the computer at work, or TBone's machine to access my email and sorabji. I've missed out on a lot I'm sure... Anyway I'm going to order my computer parts, should take a week for them to all get here. Assemble, get DSL hooked up and the world will never see me again. Bwahahahahahahah. Well now I should probably get to working other wise showing up at all today was pointless. Fuck. Have a nice fucking day asshole. |
sushi sounds super. ( i got a phone call right after i posted the above rant, it was a plea and a demand and a question, void of falseness or wanton lust- 'come home to me, please, i need you' i left and i went to him, crying happy the whole hour drive there. I did not go to work the next day. I don't mean to ruin the mood in here, but i left and i had probably the most gorgeous 24 hours in recent memory. No insanity. No guilt. One of those days where everything fit and nothing collided. The supertwins. his warm skin his smell his dirty messy hair the colour of his nipples wonderful everything i love everything but i'm not there anymore. And we had communication. Not just talk, but C O M M U N I C A T I O N like a door opens and you see things clear and he understands and he doesn't mind and he gets it all and he knows and i know and i'm sorry and he says it's okay. and he demanded i marry him, for the 4th 6th or 12th time.... we don't count anymore. Nor do we really care if we ever get married at all. But we know we would. Everyone knows that. We just don't care. uhm...return to bad day ranting ) Hal, i always liked you. buck up there, mister! Or drive around finding politicians to give the evil eye to. That works. So do bad movies. Do you have a teddy bear to sleep with? |
*smile and shake my head* I'm now going to try sleep deprivation on a major scale. Starting last night and continuing till I pass out probably doing something like driving with my luck. In any case the fun starts now. You'll just have to come up to Montana for a visit wisper, I've got this great cot, you can take my bed I'll sleep on the cot. I'll take you out for sushi and some sake', and then we'll rent some really bad movies, get a 12 pack of some good kettle house, or Big Sky brewry beer and get plowed. Sound like fun? Email? |
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I'm talking like 5 or 6 days here. |
Most people who are insomniac think they don't sleep *at all*, but they usually sleep a little. |
Have been for a while, about ever 24-36 hours I would end up sleeping something like 5 or so hours. What I'm going for now is a complete sleep deprivation track, NO SLEEP FOR HAL. |
We could go drink espresso until we start hovering. That generally thwops depression for me. Sleep deprivation can be unfun though. I need a good reason - somthing that's actually keeping me up. I can't just do it for the sake of doing it. |
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But I seem to be sleeping better now, waking up at the right time, even before the alarms. Maybe i just needed to reset the body system or something. I guess my BIOS was off? |
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Or so I'm told. I happen to be impervious to the stuff. |
Hold my calls. |
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hot water on poison ivy the boys that fell out of the tree swore by it. said they almost passed out. |
It can't be good. So ah, what does poison oak look like again?? |
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I'm very disappointed to return and find that there is no thread where the above statement would have segued nicely. Please don't allow this to happen again or there will be much smacks. |
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dicklicious |
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pube-nifique! |
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