How have you changed?


sorabji.com: Who are you?: How have you changed?
THIS IS A READ-ONLY ARCHIVE FROM THE SORABJI.COM MESSAGE BOARDS (1995-2016).

By Cat on Sunday, September 30, 2001 - 08:56 pm:

    I just read Mark’s story on the front page and he crystallised my feelings about September 11 being like some kind of birthday milestone. Almost like a BC and AD transition.

    I was playing Scrabble with a friend and referred to September 11 as "it" and he knew what I meant without having to ask. It is a day we all share, not matter where we are in this shattered World.

    My life seems to have moved and shifted since "it". Before I was afraid of saying things like "I love you" and now I’m afraid of not saying them, of not having the chance.

    The World I grew up in had an endless future. Apart from minor skirmishes and far-off tragedies, I knew everyone I loved would keep on spinning around and around on the planet with me until they peacefully dropped off. Now the axis has been bumped and the future is shaky at best.

    I feel the urge to check every day if the people I love are still here. Little trivial annoyances have faded to the background, and the very idea of making plans seems ludicrous. Sentences I speak are embedded with more meaning and friends seem so much closer. It is as if the core of me has arisen and I’ve found a new crispness to the art of living. I am certain of only one thing now - that love is all we have when everything else shatters.


By Eri on Sunday, September 30, 2001 - 09:26 pm:

    It's amazing how this horrible tragedy affects everyones lives. I have found that I appreciate my kids a thousand times more. I hold my husband when I sleep. I savor every page of every book I read. I spend a lot more time doing things with and for my church. I am even looking for work, for the first time in 2 1/2 years. It is like I am reshaping myself, in preparation of the new world to come, even though I have no clue what to expect.
    When it comes to the bottom line all we have are love and faith.


By Czarina on Sunday, September 30, 2001 - 11:53 pm:

    Sometimes,love is very confusing.


By dave. on Monday, October 1, 2001 - 12:04 am:

    i don't think 9/11 has really changed me at all. i find that it
    fits perfectly with my observation of the world and the way
    people are.

    i'm as displeased now as i was before.

    this is the way the world is. this is how we learn. this is our
    curriculum.

    welcome to kindergarten.


By Czarina on Monday, October 1, 2001 - 12:19 am:

    Again,I have to admit that Dave's thinking is in concurrence with my own.Myself,ever the fatalist.

    I never expect much from mankind.And I am seldom disapointed.


By J on Monday, October 1, 2001 - 12:42 am:

    As fucked up as I am,as fucked up as spawwn is,I always looked for the best in people,to quote a little girl who was wise beyond her years,"I still believe that all people are good" Ann Frank


By dave. on Monday, October 1, 2001 - 01:04 am:

    individually, good for the most part.

    en masse, not so good.

    i accept that many people feel the way i do. regardless, i will not join their ranks. groups are bad. groups require an enemy. groups are intolerant. i prefer to go it alone, questioning even those who feel the way i feel. question the way i feel; i'll tell you it's personal.


By Czarina on Monday, October 1, 2001 - 01:07 am:

    Thats an excellent point,J.That someone in such a hidious situation,could still look for the goodness in humanity.I wish I could be more like her.


By pez on Monday, October 1, 2001 - 02:50 am:

    it gave me the initiative to go on with what i'd been planning.

    no offense mom and dad, but i'd rather spend time with people i can talk to.


By Spider on Monday, October 1, 2001 - 08:44 am:

    "individually, good for the most part.

    en masse, not so good."


    Dave, I whole-heartedly agree.


By Spider on Monday, October 1, 2001 - 09:33 am:

    I don't think I've changed much. I have some sort of mental quirk in that I never feel like anything applies to me. I don't feel a new sense of solidarity with my neighbor. I don't think my life might end prematurely. I'm not patriotic, really, and I don't feel any anger about the situation except in some abstract way. On 9/11 and 9/13-14 I had lots of anxiety, probably because I was forced to confront the fact that I personally could be in danger, but now I'm okay. I feel great sympathy for everyone who lost family and friends.


By crimson on Monday, October 1, 2001 - 09:38 am:

    i changed by becoming even more cynical. the only difference between my worldview pre-9/11 & post 9/11 is that i'm even less impressed by my fellow humanoids than before.

    wave a flag & everything will be ok. do what the nice people on TV tell you to. belt out a chorus of "god bless america". well, that'll fucking show 'em, nimrod. people are acting like such sheep that it gives me the willies.

    quick, citizens, turn off your brains.

    however, having said that, i'm not sure i'm coping much better than the average flag-waving joe. i refuse to buy into the jingoistic bullshit...but that doesn't mean that i have any answers hidden up my sleeve.

    in the end, we're all the same. right wing, left wing. none of us are fucking bulletproof. i can be blown to cinders by a bomb, just like my next-door neighbor w/ the 200 little flags taped to her car. the threat of death eradicates all party lines. i loathe right-wing republicanism & have since my childhood, but in some weird way, it's finally hitting me that we're all in this together.


By semillama on Monday, October 1, 2001 - 09:46 am:

    That's the funniest thing about this. All the folks we despise, we're the same as them in someone else's eyes, because we're all Americans. No terrorist is going to distinguish between Jerry Falwell and Crimson because they are both Americans. You know?

    Still, I have to wonder at how much of the security measures being inacted will in the long run make us into another Israel.

    Although, I flew last Friday and experienced all those safety measures, and everyone was calm and actually upbeat about it, smiling actually. Why couldn't they have done this long ago?


By patrick on Monday, October 1, 2001 - 11:54 am:

    bluntly, Ive been invited (and of course wholeheartedly accepting) to come inside.

    too much information.....maybe. but its a huge huge huge huge HUGE change for us. I don't know what will come of it. And the practice may stop. It should stop. We just need a few more months. Yeah, another 6 months.



    Im disgusted at the behavior of many americans. Calling someone who questions our leaders as "unpatriotic". Bollocks! I love my land, I love being an American. I DON'T love my leaders and firmly grasp my right to think they are fucked, and embrace my right NOT to fly a flag, hell, even burn one.


    I, like crimson, look at them all as sheep.

    Media dissent is severely being reprimanded. Look what happened to Bill Maher for saying we were the cowards lobbing missles from 2000 miles away. The pussy came back and apologized. Im glad the network at least stood by him. Im afraid the masses will use situations like this to fragmentize the left, the antiwar movement, as it attempts to build steam. I was reading a bit in a local rag, they remarked how the extreme right and the extreme left, the Buchannans and the Nadars are actually for once one.


By droop on Monday, October 1, 2001 - 12:42 pm:

    "The disconnect between last Tuesday's monstrous dose of reality and the self-righteous drivel and outright deceptions being peddled by public figures and TV commentators is startling, depressing. The voices licensed to follow the event have joined together in a campaign to infantilize the public. Where is the acknowledgement that this was not a 'cowardly' attack on 'civilization' or 'liberty' or 'humanity' or 'the free world' but an attack on the world's self-proclaimed superpower, undertaken as a consequence of specific American alliances and actions?...The unanimity of the sanctimonious, reality-concealing rhetoric spouted by American officials and media commentators in recent days seems, well, unworthy of a mature democracy."

    - new yorker magazine. susan sontag is just plain sexy.

    she doesn't watch TV, though. she completely missed it when bill maher made her wishes come true.



By semillama on Monday, October 1, 2001 - 03:03 pm:

    I caught a bit of him on Stern, who is worth listening to for how completely retarded he is, yet funny, unlike say, Limbaugh, who's just pathetic.

    Anyway, I didn't catch enough to figure out what was going on, but I pretty much agree with Maher. It is cowardly not to risk troops. That's what they train for, that's what they want. THat being said, what we risk troops for needs to be assessed as well. Hopefully, our leaders will keep in mind Somalia, where armed thugs kicked the Rangers' asses.

    Where's G.I. Joe when you need him?


By patrick on Monday, October 1, 2001 - 03:09 pm:

    Maher was responding to our claim that the attacks were cowardly, and he said "no, in fact these guys dying for their cause is not cowardly, us lobbing missles from thousands of miles away is cowardly"

    Yeah Stern is a boob on the matter, but like you said, thats why i like stern. He's calling for just nuking them off the planet.

    I met a guy, come to find out, who was in the Special Forces, who took part in the Mogadishu raid. In fact when they stormed the beachhead there, he sawa CNN camera crew with their lights on. He took the butt of his gun and knocked they guy out and smashed the light. They say Mogadishu was partly a disaster b/c of the media. Thats part of the reason they arent talking now.


By Antigone on Monday, October 1, 2001 - 05:09 pm:

    I have been changed.

    My manager started a conversation last week about a recent incident on a Northwest Airlines flight. Three Arab men were on the plane, and the rest of the passengers became nervous. They asked the pilot to throw the men off, and he did. The Arab men are suing the airline now for racial discrimination.

    My manager was angry that the Arab men would sue. She said that Arabs in America should just expect to be treated badly and should accept it. "We're at war, after all," she said.

    At first I didn't want to discuss it with her, but after she brought it up the third time I lost my cool. :) I told her that racial discrimination is wrong, no matter what the circumstance. While the pilot of a plane has the right to take any action necessary to ensure safety, the targets of the actions have a right to contest any decision afterwards, especially if those actions break laws. She didn't see it that way, though, and that people should change the way they think "because of the times we live in."

    But that's not what changed me. Later in the conversation, another coworker brought up the stories of survivors from Sept 11th, and said that we should listen to every story, however gruesome they may be. He said that this would help us personalize the loss we've all experienced, help keep us focused on how horrible the event had been. My immediate response was, "Maybe we should personalize the starvation of thousands of people in Iraq due to UN sanctions as well."

    until that moment I hadn't personalized the human effects of America's foreign policy. I'd considered it "terrible" that so many people had to die, but that there could be a reason for it, and I didn't know all the details. There was no feeling behind the "terrible" label.

    But now that I've seen six thousand people die, I know what I should feel. If I want to know how to react to the horrible actions of our leaders all I have to do is recall the towers falling, thinking my best friend was inside.

    That's how I should feel. That feeling has changed my life. I want to understand why people like my manager have not been changed in the same way. I want to know if they can be. And if they can, I want to find a way to make it happen.


By The Watcher on Monday, October 1, 2001 - 05:42 pm:

    Your manager was wrong the airline is guilty of discrimination.

    The arabs were thrown off the plane simply because they were arabs. Unless they posed a threat to the other passingers or committed some other offence they had every right to be on that plane.

    Although the actions of the pilot and passengers are understandable. They are still wrong. And, this is the objective of the terrorists. Divide and conquer.


By semilllama on Monday, October 1, 2001 - 05:50 pm:

    The terrorists want a backlash against arab-americans, just so they have that to hold against us.

    Antigone's right. Who stops to think that everytime we drop a bomb on Iraq, some one never sees their family again? Hell, if some country was dropping bombs on me, and the seemingly main concern of that country was a TV show, well, I'd be a little pissed off too. Not to the point maybe where I would go strap a bomb to my chest, but still, the anger of a Middle Eastern person against the West is understandable.

    All I know is, 9/11 marks the start of either a new era of cooperation between nations, or a descent into a new Dark Age, and you can guess which is more likely....


By sarah on Thursday, October 4, 2001 - 01:11 am:


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