| THIS IS A READ-ONLY ARCHIVE FROM THE SORABJI.COM MESSAGE BOARDS (1995-2016). |
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Ready or not, here I come, you can't hide Gonna find you, and take it slowly Ready or not, here I come, you can't hide Gonna find you, and make you want me You can't run away From these styles I got, oh baby, hey baby Cause I got a lot, oh yeah And anywhere you go My whole crew's gonna know You can't hide from the block, oh no found out yesterday morning, confirmed with a blood test yesterday afternoon. it's official. i'm knocked up. ready or not, here i come. you can't hide. |
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thanks! if it's a girl we're going to name her Agatha Spiracle, if it's a boy we'll name him Sorabji Blindswine. |
Love the names! |
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[My name can be used for a girl *or* a boy. Just saying...] |
When should we start giving you unsolicited advice? |
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pineapple lumps! yes! unsolicited advice! yes! abolutely! i know fuck all about pregnancy, about motherhood... i don't even know what i need to know about. the day we found out, senor RACED home from work in record time, arriving at 5:35 pm. he never gets home before 6pm. i was standing on the front porch locking the door getting ready to drive to the gym to go to spinning class when he peeled int the driveway, jumped out of the car, ran up to me and hugged me and kissed me like you do when you're first dating. he was the one glowing. when i got home from spinning he was in the office on the phone w/ creditors, already getting to work on his finances and consolidating debt and doing budgets and stuff. periodically throughout the evening he would call out to me: "Honey?" "Yeah?" "YOU'RE PREGGERS!!" "Yes, I know." then like 10 minutes later: "Honey?" "Yes?" "YOU'VE GOT A BUN IN THE OVEN!!!" "I know, honey." and so on. yesterday morning senor pops out of bed 30 minutes before his alarm and races straight into the kitchen where i'm drinking my morning coffee, and he was singing a song that goes something like Oh my honey's got a bun in the oven, she's knocked up, she's knocked up, Oh my honey's got a bun in the oven.... UH OH! BAMBINO! after doing the math and recounting when we had sex in February, senor came to the realization that he knocked me up on Superbowl Sunday. so he is VERY proud of that, and said he's looking forward to being able tell his buddies. he was only half joking. man, i'm tired. |
Hopefully you won't be dry heaving every day for three months like Marci. My baby updates: Girl name: Ada Susan Elizabeth Barton Boy name: ? Finis David Barton (No decision on first name for the boy yet) We need to have a "spawn of sorabji fest" |
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Trust your instincts. Pay no attention to people who tell you scary pregnancy stories. (And they will.) Consider hiring a doula. Remember that there are a lot of different ways to be a good mother. Be kind to yourself. Let people you trust help you. Sleep when you can. Don't be afraid to give yourself over to the experience - your priorities may change for a while, but you will still be you. Keep us posted! Congratulations! |
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i can't wait to see a sarah baby, what a great mom you will be! |
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thanks Dougie! heather, in my experience the best way to have a baby is to talk all the time about how much you're afraid of it and not ready for it and how adoption seems like a better idea. next thing you know... PREGNANT! |
also, I have been told that you shouldn't bother buying cute outfits or anything like that, because your relatives will shower you with them. And this: Flickr is a great way to share baby pictures with far flung friends and relatives. |
I have to admit that when I had the girls I got TONS of clothes from everyone. And medical supplies (the funny side of having preemies, how many bulb syringes do you need?). So my traditinal gifts are a bit different. |
I've noticed that the guys at the showers I go to usually go off in a corner and do something macho like talk about sports during the gift opening phase of the party. But they're all about the drinking beer from a baby bottle game. |
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if my sister and brother in law decide to not have a 3rd kid (it would be his 4th!) then i get to have all their shit. but if they do decide to have one more, then i'm screwed. senor is already sending me crazy links to all these cute baby and toddler clothes. he is out of control. i don't think infants need cutsie stuff, they just need stuff to keep them warm and something to throw up on and diapers. right? maybe a basinette? seriously. isn't half that shit people get just unnecessary? i mean, i'm sure the thoughtfulness of the gift is appreciated, but do people really use all the infant crap they get? like this gadget i saw that warms up the wet wipes. come on! oh god. please let none of this crazyness get to me. please please please. i think i'm going to go out tonight and buy myself a bunch of punk rock maternity clothes and get my nosed pierced and dye my hair in streaks of red and purple. HELP! |
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oh my god oh my god oh my god we need to move back to hawaii. HELP ME |
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SARAH. Look at it this way: Unlike your ancestors, you will almost certainly never have to worry about Harpy Eagles swooping down from the forest canopy and carrying off your baby with its talons stuck through its eye sockets. You will never have to skin a hyena to acquire the material for baby clothes. See how easy you have it? Piece of cake! |
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gee kazu, i wonder what your cousin would have done without that wipes warmer... thanks sem. that doesn't really help, but thanks for trying :) |
with an open mind like that; I'm sure you will be a fantastic mother. |
Anyway, good luck with your pregnancy. |
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I'm sorry. |
As for the wet wipes warmer thats just freakin wierd. I think kids today are too pampered. Warm fucking wet wipes - its a cold thing for what - a minute? geez. |
WITH MY ASS. Oh, yeah, and fuck you sarah for stealing my sorabji baby limelight. |
If it's PMS, I'm right there with you. I think I've gained three pounds of water weight in the five minutes I've been sitting here. |
Even at work. Then I have to pretend like I'm joking. BUT I'M NOT. okay I am. I am the world's biggest wuss. |
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i'm not stealing the baby limelight, tig, you're gracefully sharing it with me. remind me. when is your baby due to arrive? my brain doesn't work anymore and i'm too tired to go back and look it up. i don't suppose you guys have a midwife, by chance? next week i have an intro appointment with one who was recommended to me by one of my best friends here. |
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also, does anyone else think this is weird? when i called my ob/gyn's nurse to tell them i took a preg test and it was positive, she was basically like, "great, what we do is schedule your first appointment during your 6th or 7th week, where do the first ultrasound. when was the first day of your last period?" me: uh, January 22nd. nurse: okay, so that means we'll see you in 3 and half weeks. me: but hey now, this is my first time. is there something i need to know between now and three and a half weeks from now? nurse: oh, well, are you taking a prenatal vitamin? me: no, i just did the pregnancy test an hour ago. nurse: okay, well go get a prenatal vitamin, and we'll see you in 3 and a half weeks. not to mention i had to talk her into letting me come into the lab to do a blood test to confirm the results. since then it's been up to me to figure everything else out, which seems awfully strange to me. i don't blame my ob/gyn or her nurse, we barely know each other. i've seen her only five times in my life - once a year for 15 minutes. but if that's the hospital's procedure for newly pregnant women, that makes me immediately doubtful of their practice. what if i didn't know any better and continued to drink alcohol and play a contact sport or whatever? so that's what made me curious about midwiffery. ya know? oh, and kazu, i don't know what to say, except, no worries. what you posted did not come off to me as genuinely offering real advice, otherwise i may not have posted what i did in response. but whatever, it's cool, we're cool. why do you think you probably will never have kids? |
mother adored them. |
No midwife has been discussed. I'll ask the wifey. And she had the exact same experience, sarah. The nurse basically said, "call us when you've been pregnant for a month." I guess it's standard procedure. |
i've been reading that obesity in toddlers can cause early puberty. ration your kid's food. |
The absolute worst are those frilly lace elastic things that people put on their girl baby's heads before they have hair. It looks like the poor bald thing is wearing a garter. It would be funny if it wasn't so sad. I shudder every time. |
A basinette is a GREAT idea because cribs are big and scary for a newborn. I learned that the hard way. Practicing swaddling - it's a seriously useful skill. You will create you own unique definition of motherhood. Trust your instincts and ignore advice/instructions/etc. that don't sound right to you (including mine.) Some links you might (or might not) like: http://www.hipmama.com/ http://punkparents.tribe.net/ http://www.punkrockparents.com/parentsinbandsindex.htm http://www.oldpunks.com/oldpunks3-3.html http://www.alternativebaby.com/online/catalog/AlternativeMomsToo.html |
some context. My cousin got one of those things from her mother-in-law and made fun of it and vowed she would never use it out of principle. So yes, I'm sure she would have managed without it, but it turned out to be one thing that made her (and the wee bairn's) life a little easier. If babies are overpampered it's probably not a bad thing, especially when their newborns and everything is so new and strange and scary for everyone involved. I wish I could blame my mood on PMS. I'm just frustrated. There is a chance that Sem and I won't even live together after we're married. Then with everything that needs to happen in the next few years, the likelihood of having kids is pretty much non-existent. Some baby clothes are cute. As long as they are more practical than decorative. Those headband are just plain awful though. And if I do have a baby, s/he is absolutely going to have a trogdor and a teeny tiny girl squad teeshirt. |
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Tig, this is the one i have an appointment with: http://www.newlifebirthservices.com/ so that means you are due two months before me. if you can remember, try to post all good things on sorabji and no scary things, so i don't have a heart attack. and Karla? bless you a million times over. those links have saved the day. |
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An example: http://www.preemiesrus.com/catalog/images/130SSRedDotnHeart.jpg I'm gonna stop talking about this stuff now because I'm having flashbacks. |
Sarah, go with your gut, a basinette is great. It's what we used with Micki for the first few months. It makes it so that baby has a place to sleep, but within arms reach (cuz they fit next to the beds nicely) which makes nightime feeding eaiser and cuts back on the lack of sleep when you are all so close. Cutesy clothes.....my in laws....insanity. And I hate those stupid garter things on the head, but I do have a pictures that my former in laws took of Hayley in one of those things and a frilly pink dress and pearl necklace when she was like 3 months old and couldn't even sit up. I call it the torture pic. I personally went for practical comfortable clothes (lots of cotton, no ruffles or frills). Onesies, and sleepers (like blanket sleeper pajamas) until they were older. FYI, so no one steals my idea.....I'm making Sarah and Tiggy baby blankets....an old family pattern. Kinda lame, but this pattern works well for all seasons so you don't need 50 baby blankets. If you have color preferences, let me know hahaha. Also, we all know that I once was the absolute QUEEN of pregnancy problems. If you have fears/questions I would be happy to help, but I don't want to give any broad advice on pregnancy/childbirth, because my experiences (and those whom I have been close to) have not been "normal". So I guess I'm trying to say if you think something you're going through is abnormal feel free to ask me, and I'll be honest and give whatever I can to help your fears and worries. I just don't want to add to them. If it can go wrong, it has with me, even recently, so I know tons about the worst, and have studied teh best wishing that just once that could be me. Sarah, your health in recent years is a million times better than mine was prior to pregnancies, so I don't worry about you. I really wouldn't worry. Having temporarily gone through the midwife situation, I must say, the ones I have met are extremely well educated and probably know their shit better than most doctors. And if there is reason to worry, they usually refer you to a doctor within a safe time frame. I don't want to scare you guys. You shouldn't be scared, but excited and happy. Just know that I am here to answer questions if you are worried. I don't think I made sense at ALL here, but hopefully you guys get my drift. Geez, and to think that my oldest baby is discussing boys and sex and how to not dress slutty and make up and hair and shit like that with me........I'd feel old, no wait, I do feel old!!!! Somebody buy me some hair dye to hide the grey!!!!! |
And I'm gettin' myself a onesie. A biiiig one. Fuck yeah. So, Kazu, what's the story? Why no livie with semmie? And yes, you must tell since you let the cat outta the bag. |
move up there after the wedding and finish my dissertation in Ohio. But then a fellowship opportunity emerged, one that is perfect for me and would be really good for me professionally, which would mean good things for our future. The work required of the fellowship would keep me here for another year. I think part of me will be relieved if I don't get the fellowship. Finishing my dissertation within the next year will also mean good things for the future. I know that if I get the fellowship and stay, it's a choice I made and need to live with but that doesn't make the time apart any easier. Andit sucks watching everyone around me get to start their lives with their wives/husbands. I wish I knew some military wives. That'd give some perspective. |
Still, it's been about 5 years of living apart and it gets seriously old. it's all been about the delayed gratification, and now that the gratification part is getting really close, the delayed bit is getting more frustrating. Also, I want to bring back cradleboards. Best baby accessory ever. Just strap the kid to it and hang'em up on a peg while you go about your business. Hey, if it worked for Sitting Bull, it can work for you. |
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eri, you are so sweet, thank you. colors? can you choose for me? i'm not good at that stuff. yellow. yellows would be good. |
Cradleboards. I think they still sell those out here. You can find them at garage sales once the kids in the house hit school age. Kazu, Sem, I wish you both luck. I wish I had some wonderful advice to give on balancing education, career, and family, but I am afraid I don't. I was a single parent by the time I was 20, and then a stay at home Mom by 25, and have not had the opportunity to try for that education. I don't really know what you guys are going through, but I hope that things will work themselves out, so that you won't have to be apart for too much longer. Babbling again, making no sense again, maybe if I had a good stiff drink I would make sense. |
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seems like it's the majority by far, not the minority, of women i know who have had babies have had trouble. a woman who works with me and a friend of mine, one of her best friends, they had their first babies at 33 weeks. that's about 6 weeks early, and about the maximum you can deliver early without a good chance that the baby won't make it. the woman i work with, one day she noticed that her baby stopped moving around as much as usual, so she went to the hospital, and they did emergency cesearean because the baby's heart rate had dropped to a dangerously low level. he just got out of the NICU about 3 weeks ago. the other friend, she delivered vaginally at 33 weeks. her water sac got a leak in it and they put her hospital bed rest immediately, but the same day she went into the hospital, they tried to sedate her and give her steriods or something to keep her from having contractions, but it didn't work, and out popped the baby. two pushes, out he came, she barely broke a sweat. her baby is still in the NICU. i was at a friend's bday party last night, and one of her friends was telling me she was in labor for 39 hours at a birthing center and finally asked to be taken to the hospital to be given pain killers. they ended up doing a cesearean. the baby was healthy. my sister had to have a cesearean for her 2nd baby. she had to schedule the day she was going to give birth, because her first child, we was too weeks overdue when she went into labor, and he got too big. his shoulders were too wide at that point and he almost didn't fit coming out, and they nearly dislocated his shoulder trying to get him out. so they wanted my sister to deliver a week early so that her 2nd baby didn't get too big and would fit coming out. they induced labor, and she was in labor for a day and a half and she wasn't dialating, even though they were trying to help it along by giving her more and more labor-inducing drugs. it just wasn't working. so they cut her open. my first cousin got gestational diabetes and toxemia, and had to have an emergency cesearean. these are just 5 examples of a dozen or more people that i know of personally where things go wrong, and women deliver prematurely or endure some whacky labor issue and end up having cesearan, or the baby ends up in NICU. out of all the friends and distant relatives i know around the country who have had babies in the last five years, i can think of only two who had "normal" pregnancies and deliveries with no complications. this is utterly terrifying. |
Micki was born at 29 weeks. When they came in to discuss early delivery with her they gave her a 97% chance of survival without major complications. She was an emergency c-section, but now she's a perfectly normal 7 year old now (though still skinny). Hayley was born at 36 1/2 weeks (only 3 1/2 weeks early), and I had toxemia, but again, no problems there aside from her weight. And I was able to have a natural delivery. I was only in labor with her (hard labor I should say) for 8 hours. And I have had a total of 6 miscarriages to boot. My issues are not that of normal people. My sister on the other hand (knowing that a lot of the problems I have had are handed down in our family) has had NO problems with having babies. Pops em out like candy. Her ONLY issue is that after having Matty she didn't take care of herself and still has her baby fat (and still fits into a size 1). So she's jiggly still. That's it. Same with my cousins J Lo and Lizzy. Neither of them had issues and LOVED being preggers. C-sections are a little harder to recover from (physically) afterward, and the scar is annoying, but they really aren't THAT bad, more odd feeling. I would recommend going as natural as you can in delivery from personal experience, but neither is that bad. Seriously, though, this is a wonderful little miracle, and you are fortunate to be able to this, to carry a baby and have one. It seems so commonplace, but it is amazing. Take this time to enjoy it. Relax a little and allow yourself to feel just how amazing this is and you are and be happy about it all. You're an amazing woman and I have no doubts you will be an amazing mother (I keep using that stupid word amazing, but I mean it). This could be one of the greatest moments/experiences in your life. I just want you to really truly enjoy this, and be happy. In spite of all of my difficulties, and how miserable I was pregant, I had some truly beautiful moments. One of my favorite things when I was pregnant with Hayley was freaking out my coworkers. When she would kick it was big. She'd hit my work ID hanging around my neck and it would just fly up in the air and then land on my belly again, and the guys sitting around me would squirm. I loved it. It made me laugh. Laying in bed and she'd kick/hit and seeing the outline of the little foot or hand on my belly was so powerful. I guess I'm trying to say that this is a wonderful thing you are doing, and I hope that you can embrace it more than fear it. There is so much awesomeness in your near future. I'm so excited for you (and Antigone of course). Boy, do I keep babbling or what?!?!?!?!?! |
Sarah- here is my list of crucial baby shit: 1. a good breast pump (if you're going to breastfeed) 2. a snugli or sling (sooner) 3. a baby backpack (later) 4. a wind-up swing (save your life! get dishes done! make the baby fall asleep!) 5. diaper service 6. a joanie jump up (we renamed this item)- I recommend strategic doorway placement in front of a wall mirror http://tinyurl.com/39akrj That's all you need, in my humble opinion. |
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*i* want a joanie jump up for ME. those things kick ass. two evening ago, "morning" sickness set in. it's been getting progressively more intense and more frequent. i had to come home in the middle of day from SXSW to lay down and just... whimper. i'm so pathetic. so far on a scale of 1-10, i rate being pregnant about 4. i'm thinking that number will jump around quite a bit depending on how i feel and my mood. senor is in oklahoma city this weekend for the NCAA men's big 12 basketball championship. one of his best/oldest friends works as a sports statistician for CBS and ESPN, and gets senor and another friend of theirs press passes for the playoffs every year. they get to sit on the floor. is that cool, or what? today they sat right behind the Kansas bench, and you could see him and his other friend on tv. |
rechristened it? I loved my wind-up swing, or so I have been told. I also like Sem's cradleboard idea, but that's probably because I'm pining for the |
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i'd love to see that photo! what has happened to me? i'm turning into my sister. i got up this morning at watched two shows on TLC. the first one about this woman giving birth, and they pretty much showed everything but the crotch shot. she was in the hospital and they gave her pitosin to get her labor going. then they gave her an epidural. but everthing took forever, and she and her husband were exhausted. but then she was having the baby, and when she was in labor and pushing and all that, with her huge belly sticking up, and she was looking so tired and scared... there i sat watching, balling my head off. she looked like she was in total shock when the baby came out and they put the baby in her arms. she just looked stunned. following that, there was a program where all these mothers with infants and toddlers meet at a coffee shop to talk to each other about what kinds of troubles they are having. and i watched that show with such intensity, just soaking up everything they were saying. the coffee shop scenes were interspersed with shots of them at home or doing whatever with their babies, and also interludes with a child psychologist explaining the issues from a professional point of view. it was super. both shows gave me all sorts of new things for me to worry about. just a few weeks ago had i seen those shows listed in the tv guide, i wouldn't have thought once let alone twice about tuning in. christ. sorry you guys... i need to start a journal. |
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My son LOVED the door jumper thingy. We called it his Boinga-Boinga. (sounds a little dirty, doesn't it?) I used to worry he was going to launch himself into the ceiling. He had the thighs of a gymnast by the time he was a toddler. |
Mavis has already recommended books for me to read: ina may's guide to childbirth and birthing from within |
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sweet, sweet baby jesus. after our appointment thursday, i now worship my OB. it just so happened that our appointment was set for what turned out to be 6 days of pure "morning" sickness hell. she asked me how i was feeling, and i was like, "i feel awful. like i have the worst flu of my life, minus a fever." bless her heart, she prescribed me some insanely expensive anti-nausea drug typically prescribed for cancer patients. it costs over $500 for a 6-day supply. 75% of that cost is covered by insurance, so i paid $110. i would have paid the $500 though. shit works like a charm and yesterday i was up up off the couch for the first time since last saturday. i had no idea this was an option. i thought i would just have to try to live through it. apparently some women get nausea so bad that they are put in an intravenous pump of this stuff, so they say it's safe. i'm hoping it is, because i'm taking this stuff for as long as i need to, hopefully only a few more weeks. hey tig, why didn't your wife take this drug if she was so sick for so long? forget the midwife. the day before my OB appointment, we met with the midwife. her solution was to have me eat a little something every two hours. including getting up in the middle of the night to eat. i complied with this for less than 24 hours (until prescribed the magic drug) and it was hell. eating when i already felt full, always having the taste of food half digested food in my throat, *barely* staving off nausea, still feeling like i had the flu. fuck that. it sucked so bad. anyway, we decided to refuse the 1st ultrasound and wait until we see a genetics specialist in a few weeks. the doctor admitted it was basically for amusement purposes anyway, and not a medical necessity. because i'm over 35, i qualify to go see this dude who has super dooper special ultrasound equipment and they can not only detect the heartbeat (if there is one), but if it's a viable embryo, he can measure the thickness of the skin on the back of baby's neck to see if it has Downs. they also do a super dooper blood test to check for other genetic abnormalities and stuff. my ob said that while unfortunate, it's a good sign that i feel so shitty. we'll see. |
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Without getting into any scary delivery stories, take an old ob nurses advice, and make sure you are on the monitor while you are laboring. I worked ob for many years and have worked with both Mds and midwives. All midwives are supervised by Mds, although midwives are somewhat kinder, I wouldn't trade them for the expertise of an Md in an emergency. You'll do just fine. You're embarking on a wonderful adventure.Spawn make it all worthwhile! |
About a year later a friend of mine (or my Mom's to be honest) was preggers and she had the iv with the meds you mentioned. It was a miracle for her and probably helped her in more ways than she could tell you. But she did have a normal, healthy, term, 8 lb daughter. So my experience (through a friend) says it is safe. That blood test they do for abnormalities rocks. When I was preggers with Micki I didn't pass the AFP (Alpha Fetal Protein) test the first time around and they decided to got as super duper as possible on my testing (high risk). Nothing was wrong with her at all. Although it can sometimes feel miserable, it sounds like you are doing really well. Congratulations. |
Has your sense of smell become heightened yet? That happens sometimes. |
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oh totally. i can smell anything from 5 miles away. everything tastes and smells much stronger than usual. no, it is no picnic. it's Me vs. the Alien Tadpole in the battle over my body, and the Alien Tadpole is winning. it is overwhelming and tiring. every day i am utterly dumbfounded over how everything about your life changes radically from day to day. it's not like aging, a process where you lose control over your body very gradually over time. this is a process of losing control over your body instantaneously. very unnerving. besides the fatigue and nausea, there's been so much food weirdness. not so much cravings as aversion. vegetables: i cannot even think about eating any kind of vegetable whatsoever, unless it has been cooked to mush, and seasoned or sauced beyond recognition (e.g. eggplant in indian curry). if it tastes, crunches, or looks like a vegetable - forget it. fruit: the only fruits i can eat - and i eat a lot of them - are cantalope, pears, and blueberries. chocolate: chocolate tastes a little bitter on my tongue and holds little appeal right now. speaking of which, i haven't sent my candy in yet, but i have it all right here! pork: nothing pork. no chops, no loin, no bacon, no sausage. i did eat some chicken sausage and that was really good. white meat chicken: i can do dark meat chicken, or white meat chicken if it is fried chicken. i have not eaten fried chicken in probably over 15 years, but i had a piece of senor's the other night and loved it. but no bbq, baked, or otherwise cooked chicken breast. hummus: get that garlicky goopy shit away from me. liquids: i cannot drink any liquids except coffee in the morning (half decaf), during the day fizzy water with a splash of pure cranberry juice and a splash of pomegranite juice and a squeeze of lime, at night a cup of herbal tea if needed, and only if it has lemon in it. here is a list of things i've been eating a lot of: turkey, turkey, and more turkey. can't get enough turkey. also, cottage cheese, yogurt, eggs, cheese, toast with peanut butter and jam, above mentioned fruit, peanuts, brazil nuts, almonds, sometimes tuna fish, sometimes salmon, tomato or creamy soups (nothing brothy), and white rice. i have so many friends with kids (not here in austin, but other places) and including my sister, nobody ever told me about these things. do pregnant women only talk to other moms or pregnant women about this stuff? they never told me any of it, and i remember times nearly begging them not to spare me any details. i guess it's just a little different for everyone. |
Your body will be your own again eventually, although if you breastfeed, it may take a little longer. By that time, it'll feel weird not to have something attached to you. It sounds like you're eating a good diet. I seem to remember something about avoiding certain kinds of fish, so you might want to check up on that. It could've been an old wives tale. Has anybody given you "What to Expect When You're Expecting?" If not, I can mail it to you. Lord knows I won't need it again. My baby's 6-ft tall and shaved his moustache today. |
There are so many scenarios of what could go wrong that it gives TONS of nightmares. It's got some good information in it, but it can be vague and create fear. OK, Guys stop reading now...... As far as breastfeeding goes, that is a woman's choice and I loved it, but that's just me. One thing is that it naturally shrinks your uterus back to pre pregnancy size. If you bottle feed formula, you have to take pills to do that. So personal experience...nursing, back in old jeans in 1 week (though a touch tight)...bottle feeding back in old jeans in a month (took 9 months to lose all baby weight). Just info, your call. |
It's hard not to stress about pregnancy, but the important thing to remember is that most of time, everything turns out just fine. |
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senor went to the library to get that book the day after we found out. my sister is bringing me her copy of the book when she and her family come to visit at the end of april. so i'm all set, thanks Karla! reading the book when you first discover you are pregnant and before you see a doctor is *very* scary. but also important and informative. i especially like the nutritional guide. for the record, Karla, it does say to avoid eating more than 2 (or 3?) servings of fish a week, and don't eat fish known to have high levels of mercury like albacore tuna, swordfish, etc. overall though, i'm not crazy about that book because while it tells you everything to expect, it doesn't really explain *why* these things are happening. so i ordered a book called Pregnancy, Childbirth, and The Newborn: The Complete Guide, which explains everything. for example, it says not only that heartburn and constipation are common and normal and what you can do about it, but it also explains *why* these things happen. in this case, your body is producing gads of progesterone, which acts to relax your muscles, allowing for the expansion of your pelvis and separation of your hips. but it also relaxes the muscle between your esophogas and stomach - thus the heartburn - and it relaxes the muscles in your colon so they don't contract as well to push the poop down - thus the constipation. in other news, i found out yesterday that the husband of a good friend of mine has tuberculosis and she has dormant tuberculosis. i always thought that people of my generation were required to get TB vaccinations as children, but after she told me this, i was reminded that i don't have that TB vaccination scar on my arm like most people i know do. what the hell is tuberculosis anyway? i'll look it up. |
Scary but TB is making a new and scary resurgence. There is now a strain in Africa that is untreatable, all they can do is isolate the poor victims. sarah, don't drink any rasberry tea, it is a natural ocytocin, meaning that it will induce contractions. Also, turkey will add to your feelings of being tired. After your first trimester, you should perk up. It's normal to feel VERY tired those first 3 months. Things will get better, you'll start feeling better. In my opinion, being informed is always the best policy. Keep reading, the more you know, the less frightening the pregnancy will be. Watch your caloric intake, its really easy to gain unwanted pounds while your gestating. Nature has an evil plan for pregnant women, things that didn't use to put weight on, will now make you gain, almost by just looking at them. Czarina is a nice name for female spawn. |
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thanks for the info. i'm going monday to get a TB test, since i initially declined it at my first prenatal exam. but now i probably should. the weight gain has already begun, but i don't know how to stop it really. it's a huge concern of mine obviously, considering i have fat genes and a natural propensity to put on weight (as all formerly fat people do). but i *have* to eat every 2-3 hours. before being pregnant my blood sugar was so low i was borderline hypoglycemic, and now i get the shakes immediately if i've not eaten anything in a few hours. so i try to eat a little protein and a little fat and little carbs each time. it's hard enough to eat as it is. i am NOT sticking to a high protein, low carb diet. in fact, i've decreased my protein a little and increased my carbs a little and try to watch the fat intake... but the past 3-4 nights i've been having to get up in the middle of the night to eat too, which sucks. i wake up to pee and try to go back to bed, but my stomach is growling and i get the shakes and can't get back to sleep unless i have a snack. i don't feel like i'm over eating, i'm just listening to my body and eating when it tells me to eat and stopping when it tells me to stop. i'm not sure reducing my calorie intake at this point is a good idea if it means i'm going to feel so shitty. i really don't know what else to do, but will talk to my doctor about it. very scary though. |
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and when i say like shit, i mean like i have the flu. waking up with my head in the toilet, despite the meds. sleeping all day, getting up only to pee and suck on saltines. achy, dizzy, sore. the worst constipation of my life. not to mention i can't get happy. i am sad, crying, and depressed every day. the weather here is beautiful, perfect. and i can't do anything but lay in bed, lay on the couch, and sleep or cry or whimper quietly to myself. if this sounds like exaggeration, believe me, it's not. i feel so bad for senor. i am unconsolable. he is an angel, doing everything. he's taking care of everything. meals. housecleaning. dog walking. bill paying. plumber calling. he runs interference with anyone calling on me for anything. work? hah. i'm lucky if i get there at 10 a.m., lucky if i can stay until 3 p.m. today i didn't even go. i couldn't move my body until about 2:45 p.m. i am so miserable. i was hoping that i'd be able to somewhat enjoy pregnancy and the miracle of life and all that shit. fuck it. some days i wake up and wonder if i can keep doing these even one more day. please. someone tell me it gets better. or at least tell me you felt the same way. |
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It does get better. The sickness does ebb if not dissapear altogether (it's different for every pregnancy). You get to the point where you can function much easier. The depression lightens. And the feeling of when the wee one moves inside of you is funny as hell. Don't be suprised if Senor goes to feel it and thinks you've got bad gas or something. But it's great in its oddness. You don't have a whole lot of "feeling like total shit" time left. It's not going to dissapear overnight, but it does go away. You might be somewhat like me in the fact that I never "blossomed" or "glowed" in my joyful bliss while having a baby. But I can't say I totally hated all of it. Thinking back, as miserable as I was at times, I still smile. You'll get there too. |
And the sky outside is dark grey with rain off and on, and the buds in the trees are bright green so it is a very odd, very striking kind of beautiful outside. A stunning contradiction of nature itself. I'm feeling a bit contemplative right now haha. |
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Although, from a scientific standpoint, I did find it interesting. And it is fun to produce a new being. You really should start feeling better soon.And its not unusual to have bizaare mood swings, your hormones are all out of whack. Its wonderful that Senor is so attentive. Just hang in there and know that you are loved, and cared about, and have many concerned friends from near and distant lands, pulling for you. And baby stuff is fun and entertaing to look at and pick out. And the educational toys are interesting and fun to explore. And here's some good news!!!! Later in your pregnancy, sex becomes awesome----------double, triple maybe even quadruple orgasms!!!!!! So, see, theres always a bright spot!!!! You'll feel better soon. Enjoy your mommieness. |
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50% of us boys in the 50's were exposed to it. government shit i suppose. i've had so many xrays i glow in the dark now. still kicking and coughing at 56. papa had it too. he died of drinking though. not the contagious kind either. just the killing kind. get a test please then ignore it. |
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The only active sign is the cough which I only developed as an adult, and only in the last prolly ten years. My father had the same cough. there are no other active tb symptoms, there is no contagious component. I am very clear about this as I have worked in health care and in hospitals since 1989, and every six months there is a severe monitoring of active tb symtoms and so on. ...and it is unlikely since Sarah has not visited me when she comes to the big Arch city, that I could contaminate her, senor, or her spawn or anyone else for that matter. And just for the record, it is the endocrinologists at Wash U Med Sch who say another ten years would be a nice thing, and it has nothing to do with tb. So I have been gone dealing with things, like the endocrinologists. I think too that the appropriate verb is "tolerate" rather then "accept" bullshit. Doesn't sound like you at all, Mark. Where is my "welcome back you have been gone for so long pardner??? And I do think that the government had a hand in exposure for the others who in my youth were in the same testing program. How the hell else would a group of isolated kids in the mountains get an odd strain of tb, all at the same time, and all treated at the same time, in the same way, without any adverse results as life continued? And why did some of those boys get a free pass out of Appalacia like I did? |
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hi Daniel. i've missed you! what have you been doing? i'm not worried about having or contracting TB. i either have it or i don't. i'm more concerned about contracting a simple cold. five more days until what senor calls "Bambino Thursday" - the day of our first ultrasound and results of the genetic blood tests. we'll be able to know the sex of the baby, if we want to. we have a plan now. we're going to puerto rico to get married the first full week of may. we're not telling anyone but one friend of ours and our employers that we're going away. when we come back we'll send out 2-in-1 wedding and baby announcements. that is, if everything goes well at the ultrasound appointment on thursday. there's always the chance, however small, we'll have to terminate. i'm still sick. i've tried to switch off the nausea medication to a tincture called ipacaca or something like that. it seems to work, even if it's only all in my head. it doesn't always work, but neither does the costly medication. i can't drink plain water anymore. it has to be a mixture of 3 parts bubbly water, 1 part limeaid or lemonade. for a while it was 1 part pomegranite juice, but now pomegranite juice makes me sick. can't eat turkey any more either. still no vegetables, except every once in a great while i can eat a green salad if it has lots of dressing on it. i can eat tuna packed in oil, some cheeses, and lots of dry crackers. oyster crackers, graham crackers, saltines. i can eat eggs, dry toast, and still the fruit i could eat a couple weeks ago, but i've added grapes to the list. green grapes only though. then there's the milk debacle. the unpregnant me hates milk. it is disgusting and vile and unsuitable for human consumption. but the pregnant me drinks milk like it's margaritas. i get up in the middle of the night to drink a glass of milk. every night senor asks me what i want to eat for dinner, and my answer is always "nothing". i never WANT to eat, i only HAVE to eat. it's a matter of figuring out whatever it is that won't make me sick to my stomach. today i got up at 9 a.m., ate breakfast at 10:30 a.m., and went back to sleep from 11:30 a.m. to 1:30 p.m. with an old friend from hawaii staying with us this weekend (planned before i knew i was pregnant...) i had grand ideas for what we would be doing this weekend. sleeping most of the day trumped it all. currently she's out with some other friends. and luckily she's a new mother, so she's more than sympathetic and knows what i'm going through. mostly i want my life back. i'm often times furious or frustrated that nothing seems to be in my control anymore. i don't control when i sleep or when i wake up. i don't control when or what i eat, when i take a shit. i don't control when i'll have it in me to go for a walk or a bike ride, or when i'll lay on the couch all day crying. being pregnant often feels like a mental illness, not just a physical illness. it makes me wonder why, with all the reading about pregnancy and child birth we've been doing, there isn't one book, not ONE website, that explains or prepares you for any of these experiences or feelings in any accurate or meaningful way, neither scientifically or anecdotally. it makes me feel like i'm the only woman in the world who's having this degree of difficulty being pregnant, and that's very troubling and isolating. the best i can do is keep my eye on the goal: the quadruple orgasms. hell, i can't wait for my sex drive to come back. |
That woman's aunt was the one with active TB, and she was one of the cafeteria workers at the school we worked at. Every preK-12 student and staff member had to have two TB tests (the subcutaneous needle one, not the tine test). Since I was a volunteer in the kindergarten, first, and fourth grades, my principal elected me as the designated screaming-child-wrangler and I got to be the one to hold dozens of terrified children in my lap and pin their arms down while murmuring, "If you hold still, this won't hurt a bit," in their ears. I felt like an accomplice in female genital mutiliation or something (except, uh, not). But it was unnerving. |
Hormones are the tool of the devil. It's a fact. |
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PS- you know you don't HAVE to get married. At the very least, you might want to wait until you feel a little better, so that you can enjoy the experience. You'll get through this, girl. xoxo- kelsey |
kazu, i had never heard of that book before, but i reserved it at the library, and the other called Pregnancy Sucks for Men, since i'm sure senor could use a laugh too right about now. thanks for the tip, i appreciate it. i also reserved Operating Instructions too, thanks agatha. i guess i was sort of waiting until i was big enough to start taking prenatal yoga classes, hoping to commiserate with other women in the class. i'm just so tired all the time right now that it's difficult to put energy into anything other than just getting through each day. a new mom group sounds like a great idea, especially because none of our close friends here in austin have kids. our neighbors across the street had twins in december though, so hopefully we can hang out more with them down the road. we don't feel like we have to get married, we want to get married. when we finally do it, we'll have been engaged for almost a year and the only thing that is changing about our wedding plans is the date we're going to do it. we moved it up two months so that, well, i'm not obviously showing. not that there's anything wrong with that, of course. it's just that we really want the story of our wedding to be about the two of us, not the two and a half of us. it's kind of the last thing that's going to be just between the two of us for a long time to come. we made our reservations last night - with cancellation insurance, just in case i'm still too sick to go on vacation. we still have to get rings, i need a dress, senor needs a shirt and pants, and we need to find someone to marry us and take a couple photos. it'll be fun, i'm looking forward to getting away, sitting on a beach for a few days with a good book. even aside from getting married, it'll be good for both of us to get a break from everything. |
I hope that you wedding is amazing and you really enjoy getting away for a little bit. I hope you start feeling better soon, but I have a feeling you will. Everything seems to be moving in a better direction for you. |
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After our renewal of vows ceremony, I highly recommend elopement. What a nightmare that turned into. |
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It gets better, sarah, it does. Marci is eating regularly now and doesn't have constant nausea/heartburn/insomnia. |
I am not licensed to perform marriages in PR but would take the pictures... |
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yay, congrats Antigone! i am really happy for you both. it's interesting that it seems like as an expecting mother, i'm so much more empathetic with your pregnancy too. i mean, i'm super stoked for you, stoked you're having a girl. and it is great to hear that Marci was once a pregnant puker like me and isn't anymore. they keep telling me it'll go away, but somehow you telling me about Marci makes me more hopeful. you guys can come to our wedding. it'll be in Rincon on the beach on either the 8th or 9th. we still gotta find someone to marry us, so i guess it mostly depends on when they can do it. we're staying at www.sunsetparadise.com and there are two other villas available (out of four total). so if y'all want to join us, we'll be in Rincon from the 6th to the 10th, then we're spending a couple days in San Juan before we come back to Austin. sem, tell me all the fun stuff to do! besides surf... i'm not allowed to surf :( but i can snorkle and hike in the rainforest and do some other fun stuffs. |
San Juan is pretty cool - some pretty good restaurants, and the architecture is really interesting. Check out the old spanish forts for sure. I'm guessing that Mojitos are out of the question, which is too bad, some really good mojitos there. I recommend picking up the Lonely Planet guidebook to Puerto Rico - it really helped me when I was there. One thing I didn't get to do but would have loved to have seen is the bioluminecent seas: http://www.gotopuertorico.com/puerto-rico-bio-bays.php Boy, would I love to take you up on your offer to come, but there's no way i can even think about anything but my own wedding right now! |
Don't tell anyone. Sem didn't even invite me to come for his trip. |
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sometimes you gotta let 'em do their own thing. but yeah, come down to PR with us and get revenge anyway! so i'm TOTALLY FUCKING FREAKING OUT right now. two hours from now i'll have an ultrasound device wandering over my belly. holy fucking shit! i hope everything is okay. i hope the Alien Tadpole is healthy and normal. if not, man, i am going to be so pissed off. all these weeks of hell for nothing. and senor will be bummed not just because he wants this baby so badly, but because he knows i'll be damned if i ever let him get me pregnant again. so this first time better make it, otherwise he needs to get out the adoption manual, because i'm getting my tubes tied. sorry if that sounds harsh, but it's true. the Pregnancy Sucks book said that "it's okay to hate being pregnant!" which, btw, i got the book last night and read 3/4 of it before bedtime. i laughed my ass off. so much of the author's experience was eerily exactly like mine. reading it was just what the doctor ordered. so thanks again for the tip. |
Not in this case. I'm glad you like the book. I have been advised not to read it before getting pregnant, however. |
what is that song at the beginning of this thread? based on one line, i always had it in my mind that it was an old captain beefheart song: i'll let a train be my feet if it's too far to walk to you if a train don't go there, i'll take a jet or a bus because i'm gonna find you, you're gonna see my shadow around you and my head is my only house unless it rains |
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I've been up to teaching and writing and growing orchids and tending to hostas when it is not snowing here. When you come to StL you have to come out to the gardens that have run rampant. The One Sorabjite who saw the place...wouldn't recognize the old wreck. I've been up to new windows, doors, stained glass, screen room, pool and hot tub, and the best: tore out one of the fireplaces in the living room and put in a gas stove remote control and floor to ceiling wall to wall bookcases.... still have one wall of logs to chink and seal... that's what i have been up to. And spending time with the boys, both of whom are in and out of the country. Last summer japan, this year for oldest one in germany teaching there. Now younger son is here in town staking his fortune. Just up to life. thinking about minature horses in shrevesport or somewhere like that, torcs from the danube, quantum physics and featherlite travel trailers, and consulting with counselors all over, and more of the same exciting stuff. Okay, enough suspense, how did the ultrasound come out???? |
i had an ultrasound in the summer. It was painful, they push fucking hard :( And she wouldn't let me see the pictures, that bitch. |
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wisper, i'm so flattered that you even considered it! i know, travel is so expensive. but because... well, for a lot of reasons, we decided to have a spare-no-expense holiday in lieu of a wedding. yesterday after the ultrasound we went straight to the jewelers and ordered our wedding bands. and the appointment yesterday went better than i could have hoped for. it turns out we have a healthy, low-risk, 2-inch Alien Tadpole. so we're going to start shopping for a good fish tank. just kidding. anyway, it was a super modern facility. they projected the ultrasound onto a 50" high-def TV mounted on the wall, and WOW you could see everything. it was utterly amazing. the little sucker was in there totally rockin' out to its own little tune. between the dancing and my laughter, she had a hell of a time getting any measurements for the first 5 minutes or so. after we both calmed down she was able to do her job. it took her about 15 minutes total to take measurements and give us all different views of what's going on in there. the ultrasound didn't hurt me at all. then she left and plugged in her measurements into the computer, which calculated some algorithm along with the results of my blood test. she came back to inform me that we have a 1 in 1,9886 chance of carrying a baby with a birth defect. that's *very* low risk, about the same statistic as a 20 year old pregnant woman. so, we don't need to have any invasive procedures, we're comfortable with what we found out today, and are moving forward with the idea that come October, we'll have a healthy baby. |
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droopy, the song is called Ready or Not by the Fugees. |
October, perfect time of year to have baby out there. The weather will be awesome, so you don't have to leave the hospital to awful weather (I had tons of heat and only sweats to wear as fat pants, it sucked). You'll be able to be nice and comfortable as you two and baby adjust to life at home. It may seem like a small point, but just thought of it and the thought made me happy. I wish I knew about that book when I was preggers. It might have helped. Good luck on the wedding and all of it. So sorry we can't be out there for it! |
more scrabble? i never got to finish my answer... |
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thanks, eri! heather, you got to back into scrabble and click the "finish game" button. after you do that, then the screen refreshes and you get a new button that says something like, "play again". so you gotta go in there and do that so we can start a new game :) we don't know when we're getting married exactly yet. but sometime between may 6th and may 11th in Rincon, Puerto Rico. i'll give you a call back this weekend so we can chat. oh, and get this. i feel pretty good today! like, i may even go to the gym and push some light weights around! YAY! even if it's just one day that i feel good, and tomorrow i feel like shit again, that's fine, i'll take it! |
hurray for feelin good! |
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well, it's been exactly a month since i posted on this thread. i'm a little over 16 weeks pregnant , and my belly is *really* starting to poke out now. it's high and hard as a rock and is nearly poking out as far as my tits, which is saying a lot, because my tits are huge now. but this didn't start happening for real until just last thursday. i literally woke up the day after senor and i were married (the first time... we also ended up getting married again the next day, but that's another story...) and there it was, my belly, large and in charge. it felt big for about 3 weeks, but it turns out it was mostly just abdominal bloating as well as just generally feeling pregnant. but as far as everyone else could see, i didn't look pregnant, i just looked like i was gaining weight. which i was. i am. and i'm kinda okay with that, and kinda not. i feel like i've gained too much weight too fast, and there's no going back now. and all these books i read have photos of these perfectly slender women with huge pregnant bellies. and i feel like i've been gaining weight everywhere BUT my belly. instead there are fat stores where fat stores have never been before, like on my back. i've also gained weight in my arms, ass, and thighs. we had an appt with the OB yesterday. she always offers us an ultrasound and typically we decline it, but this time i needed to see the baby. because my belly wasn't growing til last thursday, i thought something was wrong. nothing was wrong. the baby is now 4" from head to ass. the ultrasound equipment at my OB's office isn't nearly as sophisticated as at the specialists office, so the images looked like The Return of Scary Squished-Up Fetus Skull. but it's our Scary Squished-Up Fetus Skull and we love it. we saw and heard the heart beat, and my fears were assuaged. after that i had to get my blood drawn at the lab, which was a disaster. two technicians were unable to get any blood out of me, after poking and re-poking me about 5 times in the same arm. finally i told them to stop, and that i'd come back another day. i've never before had any trouble getting my blood drawn, so i don't know what that was all about. in any case, things feel much different than they did even a month ago. i wouldn't say that i'm experiencing that amazing surge of 2nd trimester energy and feelings of well-being that everyone tells me will happen. but i'm not nearly as nauseated as i was, and i do have more energy. today after work i was able to walk for 45 minutes with Lulu and then ride my bike for about 20 minutes. i didn't work up a sweat or anything, but it felt good to be able to and want to get some exercise after a day at work, instead of falling asleep straight away. most significantly the other thing that has changed is the way i feel emotionally. i still cry, but for the most part i feel much happier. also, the thing i didn't expect to happen is exactly the thing that everyone says does happen, and what an amazing and indescribable thing it is. to feel so attached to this little being inside of me, to love it so much already, and feel so excited for its arrival. the fear is still there, and the doubts and the worries. but bigger than that is a feeling that this is the most important thing in the world, this is THE meaning of life, and i happily accept the challenge. |
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bigger than your brain. so really, not all that big, but still... |
I'm so glad you're feeling better. Are you going to find out the baby's gender? |
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i don't know. we both want to, and we both don't want to - for various reasons. we probably will, because we're just too excited, even though a big part of me wants it to be a surprise. |
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so i'm 4 and 1/2 months pregnant now, and things have definitely taken a turn for the better overall. there are still things that are gross, uncomfortable, and strange, but at least i'm not puking and nauseated 24/7. mostly the nausea is gone, although there was a throwing up incident last week on the asphalt in the parking lot outside walgreens. i'm still taking the medication about 3x a week. so here are the pros about being 4-1/2 months pregnant: 1. everyone is unconditionally nice to me and patient with me. 2. i can flake out on any occassion for any reason and nobody gets mad. 3. i have a new respect for the power of hunger. 4. food never tasted better in my life. 5. each time the baby flutters, i fall in love with it a little more. 6. i can relax whenever i want to. chores and tasks don't get done and nobody complains. and so here are the pros about being 4-1/2 months pregnant: 1. gross substances are almost continuously leaking out of my pussy. 2. i have to get up 3-4 times per night to pee. and not just tinkle, i mean like pee as if i hadn't peed all day. 3. i have pain deep in my hip joints and in my middle and lower back that never really goes away. 4. i can't sleep on my stomach anymore and have to surround myself in bed with pillows. 5. i'm often out of breath. it gets worse after i eat, and at night senor can't snuggle me because any compression of my body causes me to become short of breath. 6. i can't find any bra that feels good or fits right. and one last thing - maternity clothes. yes, they are cuter and more stylish now than they ever have been before. a friend mentioned that she was clothes shopping at target and found a cute shirt, when she looked up to find that she mistakenly had wandered into the maternity section. well, yeah, that shirt is really cute on the rack, and probably would look cute on her. but the fact is, no matter how cute the clothes are, you've gained 15-20 lbs and your belly sticks out, and therefore you never really feel like you look cute or stylish, you feel like you just look fat and pregnant in a cute shirt. |
Being pregnant is pretty damn uncomfortable, for sure. Messy too. But you get used to it. Kinda. Just about the time you don't think you can stand it another minute, you'll go into labor. |
despite what you think, you *do* look super-cute, beautiful |
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funny, so many people have been commenting to me about how great i look these days. well, it's not because i'm pregnant. it's because i'm no longer drinking or taking drugs, i'm getting a lot of sleep, and i'm taking my vitamins. also, blood and melatonin production are up. i look like i have a tan all over my body. it's very strange. i can feel the baby flutter for sure. it's an unmistakable sensation. and i can feel a hardness in my lower abdomen on one side or the other, where ever it happens to be hanging out at the moment. nobody thinks i look pregnant. it worries me sometimes. several have asked lately, "when are you going to start looking pregnant?" and i just look at them like they are crazy, because i feel enormous. i guess to the untrained eye i've just developed a fuller marilyn monroe-esque type of belly or something. but when i lay down, there is a hard bump that sticks up where there was never before a hard bump. there are too many things to worry about. i really only have one goal right now, and that's to go full term. i don't care if that means gaining 5 pounds or 100 pounds, or if i never look pregnant enough. whatever, it's all of no consequence. i just want to go full term and have a healthy baby. we find out monday if it's a boy or a girl. we're going to find out, but the problem is, we don't really want anyone else to know. |
I am so pleased you are feeling good! You even read good (you know what I mean). Yay! |
Isn't she adorable? I love babies. |
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awww, is that your granddaughter? she's absolutely precious! |
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true, but that's what makes the photo so adorable. |
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I'm sorry about your mom. J, what's your granddaughter's name again? |
[IMG]http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y121/scjdcarter/carsonsbirth58.jpg[/IMG] Here's a picture of her with her cousin Kaylie. |
[IMG]http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y121/scjdcarter/carsonsbirth20.jpg[/IMG] Here is Orion who is 6 and getting his first permanent front tooth. http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y121/scjdcarter/orionandkaylie.jpg Jonathan 13 http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y121/scjdcarter/JonathanAug_2005_jpg4.jpg |
life is good here in the hills. you come visit when visiting your in laws? |
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yes, i will, i promise, i swear. we probably won't be visiting them this year however. maybe in the spring. i can't believe i'm going to squeeze a human being out of my vagina. there are two little feet inside my body right now. what a fuckin' trip! it truly is a miracle that *this* is how human beings are created. |
Is your dad excited? Will this be his first grandbaby? I hope that baby has your nose. Do you live close enough to Tiggy to have playdates? Czarina is out here and she told me to tell you,Woo Woo,Congrats! |
I absolutely loved the fluttering of baby in belly, but the greatest part was last trimester when baby would kick and you could see hand/foot imprint on my belly. I wouldn't worry about people looking at you and not realising that you are preggers. People didn't acknowledge that I "looked" pregnant until about 7-8 months with Hayley and about 6-7 months with Micki (I gained a lot more weight with her). I was back in my old jeans one week after giving birth (though they didn't quite fit the same). When I first started reading this thread I got a serious case of baby fever. I'm over that now. I have a new mission. Hayley had a slumber party (that ended up lasting 4 days) for her birthday this year. One of the girls is a foster child who has been in the system for 10 years. She's in a house with 10 other kids and some of them are into drugs and violence and such. She's really unhappy there. She's a good kid, don't get me wrong, so a teenager, but a good kid, smart, edgy, and well behaved at the same time (though the bedroom was a total disaster with clothes everywhere hahahaha). So my mission is clear, get back to work (still waiting on my start date), get finances a bit ahead, finish step parent adoption of Hayley and then adopt this girl. I already have a good set up for her as far as adding her into our family. The larger of the bedrooms for the girls has bunk beds, so they the teens could share the larger room. She wears the same size shoes as me (and she loves to borrow my shoes) and clothes will be relatively easy as she is right in between Hayley and I on sizes. So now I am all about getting things in order so that we can get her here with us. Am I crazy or what?!?!?!?! |
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no, you're not crazy, you're a beautiful human being for adopting her! that's awesome, eri. i'd love to be able to do the same thing some day. J, say hi to Cz for me. i don't think Tig and are close enough for regular play dates, but maybe once in a while if we ever make it into each other's city. i have been writing a journal but it's not published for public consumption. i'd absolutely DIE if my mother or her family found it. the last thing i need right now is family drama. my dad is so excited, he's lost brain cells and gone retarded. it is his first grandchild. he started sending me little girl's clothes well before we knew it was a girl, just because he wants a granddaughter badly - he thought he could hope it into existence. lucky for all of us, otherwise if we'd had a boy, i'd have to simply hope he looked good in pink dresses. i get mass emails from nate, occasionally personal notes. i think he's busy with writing and art projects. |
thought of sarah. then i thought about road tripping to vegas. |
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But all in all, I am not pregnant but look like it. And glad that i can plan on a springtime visit perhaps. Pool is open if anybody wanders this way. |
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bitchin! what's your official title at Hardline Design? are you the head of archeology? is it fun digging for stuff? what was the coolest thing you've found so far? |
I'm a "principal investigator" which means I direct projects and co-direct the department with another principal investigator. It is fun digging for stuff, but most of my job these days is me sitting in front of a computer. |
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lately i've been referring to myself as Princess Pregnant Braindead Exhibit A |
Queen Pregnant Braindead.....I think I held that title for a while myself! Wait, I think I still do (except for the pregnant part)........ |
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26 weeks pregnant now. 27 weeks on monday. i can't say too much has changed. being pregnant is just as difficult as it has been from the start. in some ways, in different ways, it's getting harder. i wrote in my journal yesterday that in every way imaginable, i feel like i'm stuck in limbo. i never feel quite right physically. i'm either uncomfortable or nauseated or exhausted or trying to catch my breath. other times i feel stuck in time, like i'm waiting forever for something to happen, meanwhile there's always something to be thinking about, or something to get done, and there can't possibly be enough time to do it. the trap, perhaps, is assuming that after the baby arrives these feelings will suddenly disappear, the spell that has been keeping me in limbo has been broken, and it'll feel like i've walked out of a long dark tunnel. while it's certainly going to be different once our baby is here, i fear that while it might no longer feel like limbo, it'll simply be a different kind of struggle. we spend too much time lately doing tasks. lots of house-related tasks. plumbing contractors, electrical contractors, drywall contractors, general handyman services. making lists, making calls, doing research. by the time all the tasks are done, i'm too tired to go out or do anything fun. and for certain this window of opportunity for going out and having fun is quickly coming to a close. i already feel huge and uncomfortable. my job has become somewhat of a lifesaver, the thing that keeps me focused and centered. it diverts my attention away from baby related things, keeps me stimulated. when i get home, i become maddeningly absentminded, to the point of blatant stupidity. i can't remember shit. i walk into a room only to forget why i'm there. i pick things up and carry them around with me until i realize there's something in my hand and wonder why i'm holding it. i forgot to mail our bills last month. i forget to call people back. i left the door open to the garage, and Leroy took the opportunity to sneak in there and "clean" out the litter box. every last poop. then he spent the next day puking. i leave the refrigerator door open and leave the house. i can barely stand myself. poor senor. he stays so upbeat and cheerful, never angry with me, never revealing the frustration he *must* be feeling. he's just there, scrambling to take care of everything, scurring around cleaning up the wrecks i leave in my wake, never complaining. i try not to complain, but it's hard. everything is so hard. it's utterly remarkable to me, when i reflect back to earlier this year. life before pregnancy was so simple. easy. predictable. nothing like it is now. |
M was walking into the bathroom late last night, 8.5 months pregnant, wearing nothing but mismatched socks. I thought I was going to die with love. She is the most beautiful woman and a half I've ever seen in my life and I thank my lucky stars every day that she married me and that she's having our child. We went to an all day parenting class a couple weekends ago. Part of it was relaxation exercises. Like I need relaxation exercises. I'm the god of being relaxed. But as we were laying there together I had one of those "life flash before your eyes" moments, except it was more like "our lives flash before my eyes." So if senor is experiencing even a tenth of the happiness I'm in now you can understand why he's so laid back. |
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that's so sweet. you both are lucky. 8.5 months eh? wow, i bet you both are getting so excited. is M handling it okay? is she ready to be done with it or how does she feel? are you nervous? |
We went to the doc today and he said, "Right on time, about 2-3 weeks." She was like, "One week? Could you make that one week?" :) I'm not nervous, really. Standard anxieties, and such. Been ready to be a daddy for quite some time. |
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can't believe i started this thread six months ago. it feels like years ago. i'm coming up on the tail end of this journey, and still, even now, i have mixed feelings about it all. physically, i feel completely betrayed by my body. which is sad, because my poor body is only doing exactly what it is supposed to do, perhaps just about 5-10 years later than when, physiologically, it would have been best to do this sort of thing. emotionally i feel taut again. not quite as bad as during the 1st trimester, but the highs and lows are unpredictably close to one another, triggered by the most random things. i keep coming back to this place where i'm counting on things generally getting a lot better after the baby is born. in reality it may turn out to be just as hard, but at the very least, my body will belong to me again. if i'm exhausted, it will be due to lack of sleep, as opposed to being exhausted even after 8, 9, 10 hours of peaceful slumber. the past few months have been a little disappointing. i never did get the 2nd trimester relief that everyone promised. additionally, i don't think senor and i did enough to take advantage of the last of our child-free life together. most of the time has been spent "getting ready" for life with baby. this, to senor, has meant plumbing work, drywall work, an impossibly long list handyman type projects. installing shelving in the utility room. cleaning out the garage. selling our unused stuff. a never ending list of house-related projects. he had been wanting to do this stuff, but the baby increased his sense of urgency. he thought it would have been too disruptive to do it after baby. perhaps he's right. meanwhile, the guest bedroom, which is supposed to be the baby's room, remains a guest room, except the closet is now filled with baby clothes, and baby gear, bought for or donated to us by friends and family. last week i bought a bassinet for $45 off craigslist, then bought a mattress for it, sheets, and pads. i set it up, tucked a receiving blanket around it all, and it sits next to the guest bed. my old surboards are still in there, my guitars, an extra television, and some random art work on the walls. overall, it's not a room that makes me feel like we've put any priority into making room in our lives for a baby. we've made our house more convenient, but nothing about it bespeaks of an infant on its way to our home. it's kind of depressing and whenever i go into the bedroom to look at the bassinet, i am often overcome with anxiety and start to cry. so i do small things to make myself feel better. i tweak the gift registry. i buy diapers, and breast pads, and diaper rash cream, and nipple soothing cream, and i've tried to arrange somewhat decoratively the baby toys and books we've received so far. senor has promised me that from here on out we'll start to do more to make ready. but for him, this means, selling his old stereo components (we don't need them anymore). this will make room in our bedroom to move some stuff out of the guest room. it means getting screen doors installed on the french doors. this is so that i can sit inside during the cooler months with the doors open and the bugs won't get in and bother me or the baby. to me, all this seems like just more house related projects. meanwhile, i'm starting to get my bags packed and ready for the hospital. i'm trying to find a used dresser / changing table to buy (they go super fast on craigslist, it's been an impossible feat so far). i'm scheduling interviews with doulas. i'm picking out potential new paint colors for the baby's room. i'm practicing using the car seat. i'm washing and folding baby clothes and blankets and towels and sheets. rearranging and evacuating the linen closet to make room for baby stuff. in the meantime, i bemoan not being able to go see the Black Crowes last night. it got trumped by our 2nd (out of 4) childbirth class. which is not necessarily a bad thing. the childbirth class is good, and last night we got to tour the birthing center and see the rooms and stuff. which did a lot to put my mind at ease. but it's also just a sign of more baby-related sacrifices to come. it seems so. grossly adult. i've given up rock and roll? for how long? is it being replaced, even if temporarily, by something better? that, seriously, remains to be seen. everything in my bones tells me, yes, it'll be the best thing ever. i love this baby so much already. i can't wait to meet her, and hold her, and feed her, and watch her grow up. and i love my husband even more than ever, and our family to be. but i can't help, at times, to worry about my capacity for motherhood, and missing the things being left behind. and that's the truth, the whole truth. |
To summarize, all of your feelings are completely normal. And yes, you'll be able to go see music, it will just take a little more planning. PS- you really don't need a changing table, but get one if you feel so compelled. I'll make you a bet that you'll never use it, and it will become yet another surface to pile stuff on top of. Maybe that's just our household, though. |
Your life will be baby centered for a while - but with each passing week, month and year, you get little piece of your life back. And you'll appreciate it even more when you do. It's going to be OK - and maybe even amazing. |
How cool is that? I don't come out much anymore; butI want you to know I am thinking about you all. |
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thank y'all. about half the mothers i talk to love and use their changing table, the others never use it or don't have one at all. i guess i could go either way, but i think i'm the type of hyper organized person who will want a "station" to do that sort of thing. the one i wanted originally was &75 and you could roll it from room to room, which would work great at our litte one-floor house w/ wood floors. but whatever. that's just stuff, i guess. sometimes it all feels completely overwhelming, and other times i feel really relaxed about it. sometimes too relaxed, and then i get nervous that i'm taking it seriously enough. so there's always somewhat of a swing effect going on. i know it'll be fine. i know it'll be an ajustment that we can handle. in the meantime, i'm sore all over and sleepy all the time, and i wish i could just lay down and rest for the next 7 weeks, or until she gets here. |
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sexy mamma. emphasis on mamma. today i am 37 weeks pregnant. 3 weeks away from my due date. it's hard to believe i've made it this far. it's been the longest year of my life, and also one of the most eventful. i got pregnant. i got married. i took a trip to puerto rico and pennsylvania. my sister came to visit. my friend autumn came to visit. my friend teresa came to visit. our friends from st. louis came to visit. leroy had an ear infection for most of the year. two of our friends here in austin got married. two of our friends here on sorabji got married. one had a baby. now, to top off the year, i'm giving birth to a new member of our family. and a new mother will be born, along with the baby. i can't imagine another year, past or future, being so transformative. |
you should do one nude. |
It tires me out just watching the amount of work Marci has to do, adn the amount of sleep she (doesn't) get. But it's worth it for the kid. They end up being much healthier and smarter as a result. And there's no better way to bond with baby. |
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Entering the home stretch, eh? One of my co-workers just had her second baby, and named him Ian Cornelius. Which I think means he's destined to be a DJ. Think about it, "DJ Ian Cornelius" - has a ring to it. |
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http://youtube.com/watch?v=fjDojEOiMcE |
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mommy's lil' pumpkin. that is what baby is wearing home from the hospital. it was a gift we got at a baby shower they had for us at work. i lerv it. makes you want to have a baby too, doesn't it? 12 more days til my due date! |
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However, these days I am far too busy getting my head around the idea of not having children to let anything that cute warm my uterus. |
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in time, you will have babies. |
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so tomorrow (today) will be day Three of maternity leave. on day One, i had a doctor appointment. then i ran errands all day. on day Two, i got a 90 minute massage, went to ikea to return some crap and bought a big purple rug for our dining room (the dogs puked on our old run so many times it was totally ruined... i'm sure baby will do the same to the new purple one). then i got a smoothie, came home, took a 2 hour nap, then sat on the back porch and watched the sun go down. so for day Three, i'm getting a bikini wax, then a pedicure. later in the afternoon i was wanting to see a matinee with my preggo friend Rita (due the day after me), but i'm having a hard time deciding what movie to see. nothing seems that gripping. already saw the Borne movie. i'm only a little bit curious about the Darjeeling movie. it seems tolerable because it is a mere 91 minutes long. there's the valley of ellah, but perhaps depressing? the jane austin book club? gah. |
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i'll go see Darjeeling. i'm just afraid that anything after The Life Aquatic will disappoint. haven't seen Stardust. we saw Michael Clayton last weekend. senor liked it a lot. did i mention i've reupholstered our dining room chairs? the fabric reminds me of Good N Plenty candy. |
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today is my due date. but no signs of baby on the way. |
Don't worry. The baby WILL come. :) |
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i'm not worried, but i wouldn't mind if she came out pretty soon. if nothing else, i'm getting a little bored. platypus sent baby the most awesomest baby blankie ever! it's bright orange and the softest blankie ever. she also sent a pink plushie teddie bear that rattles. thank you thank you! pray for labor! |
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Charlotte Johanna was born at 9:26 a.m. on November 3rd. she weighed 8 lbs 9 oz. (today she weighed 8 lb even, and when we left the hospital tuesday afternoon she weighed 7 lbs 14 oz). she is 20 inches long and she has 10 fingers, and 10 long toes on two relatively large baby feet. my labor and delivery were a level of hell that, while inexplicably horrible (and a story for another time), i would do 100 times over just to have my baby in my arms. i have never loved anything or anyone as much as i love her. it is so huge, so deep and pure, there is absolutely no feeling like it. she is sweet and beautiful and perfect. senor is absolutely retarded over her too. he feels the same way i feel. it's hard to imagine that both of us, before i got pregnant, were unsure about whether or not we wanted kids. it seems ludicrous to us now that we would ever want it any other way. that we might have missed out on this experience, and the greatest love there is. we definitely made us a sleeper. we have to wake her up ever 3-4 hours to feed her, otherwise she will sleep up to 6 hours without eating. she barely even makes a fuss. the only time she cries is when we change her diaper. she gets furious, but as soon as the diaper and her clothes are back on, you pick her up and she immediately settles down again with no other soothing required. i'm aware her demeanor may change as she is only 5 days old today, but even if she gets colic, i would love her all the more for being such a fragile, sweet girl. |
i'll post photos soon. if you want to download a 65 second movie of her with the hiccups, you can do so here. |
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moonit, thank you so much for the package! okay, i gotta go pump my titties. bye for now. |
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Bravo! |
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charlotte is my mom's name, too. |
I'm so glad to hear that you are doing well, and thanks for taking the time to keep us posted; I imagine it's pretty crazy when you first bring a kid home. |
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Is she allowed to use the Internet yet? You didn't name her after Blindswine? |
A friend of mine had her baby this past weekend. She was going into her 43rd week. Her baby was 11 pounds, 1 oz. And was 24 inches long. |
I like the name Charlotte because it is pretty and distinctive but not weird. My cousin just had a baby and named him Runyund or some sort of Raymond/Riley/Reynold/Rudy hybrid. I asked if she was still using the wipey warmer. She made a new one out of a ceramic-candle-bowl thing. Her babes don't stop crying when the diaper change is over. Eventually babies want to be naked all the time. If anyone were to look in our apartment s/he would assume that I am either pregnant or trying. I take prenatals (for the folic acid) and have the following books in my book case: Ina May's Guide Pregnancy, Childbirth and the Newborn The Ultimate Breastfeeding Book of Answers The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth Gentle Birth Choices The Doula Book The Birth Partner They were for a course I was going to take this fall, but didn't. I'm trying to decide what to do with them. For someone who has never been pregnant, I know an absurd amount about pregnancy, labor and delivery, and breast-feeding. |
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we solved the cold wipes dilemma before it even started by not using wipes. for poopy butt, we use disposable, dry gauzy pads that we run under warm water. for wet butt, we use baby washcloths that we run under warm water. since we got about 50 total washcloths from our two baby showers, might as well put them to use. she still never fusses, except when she's naked or getting her diaper changed. it's amazing. she sleeps sleeps sleeps and has a little more alert time now. also, she eats a lot more, even one week after birth. we didn't officially name her blindswine, instead we named her after his mom. but her nickname is blindswine sorabji, and we call her BS for short. here are some more photos. |
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that didn't work, did it? try this link instead. |
sticking out. I'm obsessed with birth stories so I hope you post yours soon. I wish we had a better chance for a surprise at the end of this month. Don't tell Sem I said that. |
Sorry I was awol for a bit, in a reese's coma (thanks Sarah!) I hope Leroy doesn't steal the kiwi - Reese stole the first one I bought and carries it round making it peep. |
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moonit, we LOVE the kiwi! the peeps it makes actually sound a lot like the coqui of puerto rico. and the onsie is awfully hip. senor was STOKED about the pineapple lumps. i gave him his own bag, and hid the other one :) kazu, you should read Spiritual Midwifery by Ina May. i liked that one better than the Guide to Child Birth. i'll tell my birth story in short form: my water broke at 9:30 a.m. on Friday. i was actually peeing when it happened, so that was lucky it didn't go all over the place. we went to my OB's office around noon, after getting some stuff at home taken care of finishing packing our bags. she tested me to make sure it was my water that broke, and yes, it was. so senor and i walked 2x around the outside of the hospital to get some last bit of fresh air before being confined to a hospital room. but also in the hopes of getting my labor started... since i was only having a very mild cramp-like feeling once every 30-45 minutes. by 7:00 p.m. that night, i had had only one contraction of any significance, so i let them induce me. at that point i wished i had just stayed at home, but they put the fear in me that baby would be at risk for infection since my water broke. contractions started by 7:30 p.m. i was getting through them fine with help from senor and our doula. but by midnight was only dilated to 1 and the contractions were hitting hard and fast, bone crushing pain. i was begging and screaming for an epidural, which i didn't get until 3:30 a.m. (i don't believe i would have needed the epidural if, by midnight i was dilated to 6 or 7, but anyway...) the nurse wouldn't even ask he doctor if it was okay, because she was convinced that he'd say "no" simply because i wasn't dilating. doesn't make sense to me, but that's what happened. between 3:30 a.m. and 7:30 a.m. i was on the epidural, and i had only dilated to 3 centimeters, and the contractions apparently were not coming strong enough or close enough together. then my blood pressure dropped to 70/30, and baby was starting to go into distress, so they cut her out of me. while prepping me for the c-section, the nurse nearly put a syringe full of epinephrine in my IV, but i caught it just in time. i'm allergic to epinephrine, and if you remember when i had my ovarian cystectomy in 1999 i think it was, they did the same thing in recovery, and i had a seizure. in that recovery, they gave it to me because my heart rate had dropped to 32 or 34 or something, and they did it even though i begged them not to. i spent the rest of my labor in utter terror that the same thing would happen - that my heart rate or BP would get too low and they'd put epinephrine in my IV even though i was allergic to it and send me into a seizure, and put both me and my baby at risk. so the whole time they were cutting her out of me, i was shaking from head to toe uncontrollably, as if i had parkinsons or something, and grabbing onto senor for dear life, and trying not to pass out. after they got her out, and she cried, and they wrapped her up and put her on my chest, suddenly none of it mattered. but, like i said before... i'd go through that hell 100 times if i had to, just to have my baby, who is so beautiful and perfectly healthy, and the best thing to ever happen to me. |
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you're home now and resting and bonding. |
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yesterday CJ was 3 weeks old. i'd like to say it has gone by so fast, but really the last three weeks seem like three months. it's been such an amazing time. day is night, night is day, dogs sleeping with cats, pineapple cakes right side up. it's fun playing with her, watching her eyes come into focus more and more, seeing how much she has grown. getting more comfortable with breast feeding. worrying less about everything in general. she's such a joy. a miracle. she's so beautiful and pure. it's really just unbelievable. but senor goes back to work tomorrow, leaving me home alone with baby for a whole day. i know it'll be okay, that i'll manage, and maybe it will be fun. but i'm mostly dreading it. it's been awesome having both of us to do the work of caring for her. but now... nobody to hand off the baby to when i have to pee or take a shit or eat, and there's only so much that can be done during nap times. it also means tonight is the first night that i'm the only one getting up to feed her, so senor can sleep and be rested for work. i feel ashamed in a way to admit this, but for the first time, today, i realized that going to back to work isn't going to be as hard as i imagined it might be. i'm already starting to look forward to it. to having some semblance of a normal schedule. having help (nanny? day care? we don't know yet...) with CJ. having time to myself to go to a yoga class, or having time to myself at all for anything. then again, maybe when the time comes, by then it'll be very different, and i won't want to go back to work. maybe caring for CJ will be a lot easier. i'm hoping it will be. i'm not saying i don't love her or that i don't enjoy taking care of her. i do. but how can anyone be expected to do one single thing 24 hours a day, every single day? it's hard. that's all i'm saying. i love it. and it's very, very hard. |
One of the hardest things I ever did was drop my son off at the sitters that very first time. And of course everyone was asking about him him when I got back to work, which made me cry. I had this dick of a boss who thought it was funny to walk behind me and whisper, "Karla, I think I hear a baby crying. The whole work/family balance is so hard. |
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just goes to show how much happens...all the things that are missed.. congratulations sarah! |
sarah, kind of a weird feeling to catch up on 9 months in one sitting... i have a feeling if/when i get pregnant i will have the same feelings you did...it's good to know the power of nature is so strong to have it all be so worthwile in spite of the tough journey... i have dreams of being able to have a barefoot, t-shirt and diapered baby with no accessories..in a simple umbrella stroller.. but then we got a puppy, and one weekend away and the trunk was full of puppy related "things"..i panicked about not having the right thing when i needed it..i don't have the personality to pull off the hippy baby..that makes me sad..i might be able to but it would take restraint.. take care and have fun with charlotte |
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wow, thanks spiracle. i'm happy to hear from you and appreciate you taking the time to catch up. karla, thanks so much for the gifts!! fucking kick ass! |
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today is my baby's 7th day at day care. the first 3 days she was only there for 4 hours. these last four days, she has been there for 6 hours. it is 2:26 pm here. at 2:30 every day this week my heart begins to pound in my chest, i shake, and break a sweat. i can't eat or concentrate on work. so i bolt out of my office and drive as quickly as i can while still maintaining safety to where she is, and i take her home with me. and i try my best not to cry when i see her, but i am washed with relief and joy and it's too overwhelming for words. and when we get home, we play together, and i feed her, and if she's sleepy i rock her or take her for a walk in the stroller. she loves when i pretend i'm eating her toes. just recently she's learned to sort of point her little feet in the direction of my mouth, to indicate that i should begin the game of pretending to eat her toes. i can't take her to day care. senor has to drop her off, i can't handle it. the other day i had an early meeting and as she sat in her little bumbo chair, she watched me as i bustled around the kitchen and living room, getting ready to go. and i watched her watch me walk out the door. and i spent the rest of the day in a state. and except for the very first day back to work, every other day since then has been nearly unbearable. people have been telling me, you'll adjust. it'll get easier. i don't want it to get easier. i don't want to get used to being away from her. this isn't right. this isn't how it's supposed to be. i never thought i would feel this way. i mean, i always assumed it would be hard to go back to work, but i always assumed it wouldn't be THIS hard, and that i'd just go back to work, and she'd be in day, and life would go on just fine. and that is not at all how this is working out. i don't mind being away from her for a few hours, while i run an errand or go to the gym or something. but 7-8 hours a day? fuck this. fuck this fucking shit. i want to be with my daughter. i'd be happy to send her to day care when she's older and can interact with the other kids and learn stuff there. but she's too little to get benefit from day care. fuckity fuck. here are some recent photos of my daughter. http://www.syrup.org/cj/happiest_baby1.jpg http://www.syrup.org/cj/purple_fleece.jpg http://www.syrup.org/cj/bumbo_chair1.jpg http://www.syrup.org/cj/bumbo_chair2.jpg http://www.syrup.org/cj/happiest_baby1.jpg time to get out of here before my head explodes. |
I'm sending you good vibes. |
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thanks. here's another great photo of her: http://www.flickr.com/photos/bluishorange/2242467648/in/set-72157603342868282/ |
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stuck in OKC for a few days. looking for dinner tonight if any sorabjite local in OKC. call me on my cell, girl. you look great as a mom. glad all is well. sorryso distant from everyone the last year. oh yes, some news: getting married June 21. y'all invited. |
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believe it or not, bluishorange actually works with me now. i hired her last june or so. she's awesome. not to mention, we've been friends for years. never been to OKC, but senor was there this time last year for the big 10 ncaa men's bball finals. he says the steak house Joe Dimaggio's was great. btw, we'll be in st. louis this summer, so senor's mom can meetin cj. maybe we'll make it for your wedding... |
bluish orange is an awesome photographer. how cool. there's a Mantle restaurant, and I ate yesterday at Pearl's Crabtown, which is owned by a friend of my friend here. cedar planked trouts with a remoulade sauce, garlic mashed taters, and kickmypants gumbo. Highly recommended. Went to some killer meetings over the weekend, and visited the OKC bombing memorial. fantastic museum, horrifying memories. Now in Norman for a few days south of town. travelling back toward memphis before Omaha, then Souix city then Minneapolis, then home for a few then onto to Wisconsin for almost a week. Most sane people go south in the winter. Not me. Glad you are well. |
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I would go to Ecuador anytime, volcanoes or no. Do any of us live near green Bay WI? |
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my daughter is the coolest thing ever. yesterday she turned 5 months old, and she is still such a sweet, happy, smiling, easy going baby. and i have never been happier. as time goes on, every day with her is more and more like a day in heaven. not to say that it's not hard. godalmighty, it's hard. at this stage, the hardest thing is no longer the work. she's easier because she's more predictable now, and our lives have adjusted pretty well to the day to day work load of having a baby. the hardest thing is the love! it's the greatest thing, and the hardest thing. some days i feel like a teenager - my emotions all out of control spinning every which way. such deep sorrow being away from her for 7 hours a day. such worry for her well being. such hope for her life. tremendous effort to be a good parent, now, and preparing for being a good parent as she changes and grows older. difficulty falling asleep at night. overwhelming joy and love and happiness when we are together. disbelief and amazement at her beauty and purity. the highest highs, the lowest lows, all wrapped up in such a perfect package. another great thing about it is that all that stupid shit i used to spend my time doing or worrying about, i can see it for what it is now - just stupid shit. how much time was wasted on what now seems meaningless BS. motherhood feels like a calling to me lately. if only i had known before how much motherhood would change me, make me a better person, how much i enjoy the work - i would have done this way earlier and been one of those insane people who end up having way too many kids. i hated every minute of pregnancy, but it is so worth it. if i thought my body could take it, i'd love to have two more. in all likelihood, we'll have one more. maybe adopt the third. i don't know, it's just something we talk about. i do know that my daughter is the happiest accident of all time. i'm going to go listen to her sleep, and then hopefully fall asleep myself. |
my sister - who is having her first baby at 37 - has been getting worrying news from her obstetrician, lately. first they told her that the baby not come to term (she's supposed to be due April 20). Now they're telling her the baby's weight seems to have "plateaued" at 5 1/4 pounds - she's not gaining any more weight and might not be getting all the nourishment she needs from the placenta. i don't know nothin' about birthin' no babies, so it's got me worried. |
but the good news is that the doc can can go in and get that baby out now if necessary, since it's only a couple weeks before her due date. (some babies are born way more prematurely than that and still make it...) so if there's anything nutritionally deficient, they can probably supplment the baby's need in the NICU. i hope everything goes okay! |
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i landed at PDX on monday night after 48 hours of exhausted madness in PA/NYC. Argon and The Fuzz showed up at the baggage claim just in time to catch me falling asleep standing up and saved me from the embarrassment of going TIMBER! right into the baggage carousel. i was in pretty rough shape-- so i'd probably have ended up in the lost and found rather than be claimed by anybody interesting, but whatever. i met Little Fuzzball in the morning with Mom and was blown away. little fuzz is only seven months old and is already possessed of a full-blown personality. you might not understand the words coming out of his mouth but he makes damn sure you get what he's trying to say. sometimes he'll just fix you with a look. and for a seven-month old, his looks are Serious Business. there's nothing myopic or frivolous in there, either. when he's looking at you-- you know it. he gives you the feeling that you're being estimated, analyzed, measured up. the first time i held him i thought he was gonna take a swing at me, so i quickly gave him back to Mom. but he decided i was a friendly after i started playing the rhodes and let him jam on the high keys. he'll go from a "i've altered the pool!" look to ripples of pure laughing buddha joy in the blink of an eye. and when he's happy, everybody's happy. today little fuzzball got the green light from the cardiologists-- surgery fixed his heart condition so now he'll be able to continue his plans for world domination without any worry or concern. i love the little fuzzball. and he loves me. |
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there is nothing more addictive than the laughter....i mean the really deep laughter that truly resonates from the belly of a baby or toddler. Eva is close to being a kid now, not so much a toddler but her laugh is still infectious to me. I have to give her a good belly tickle at least once a week to keep it fresh in my mind, so fresh that when I hear other kids out in public laugh like that it makes me smile ear to ear. droop it will be good to meet your niece sooner than you thought. good thoughts to texas. |
My favorite baby noise is that weird little snort-breathing they do. It can't be typed out, but I'm sure you know what I'm talking about. |
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Droopy's an uncle. I love that. |
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congrats Uncle Droopy! glad sara is healthy. how much did she end up weighing? |
there seems to be some kind of confusion about her name, now. my sister picked the name sara helen (sara after our mother (who goes by sally) and helen after our grandmother) but has announced that she will never call her daughter "sara" - a name both my mother and i prefer. so now we either call her by both names or by her initials: shy. |
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if it turns out that this kid has my sister's personality, then i will definitely call her "shy" for the shear irony of it. which would make her name "shy yoe". |
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patrick, you're right. things definitely have turned a corner at 5 months old. she is an alert, bright, happy baby. she smiles and is practicing making laughing sounds. she smiles with her whole body - wiggling with glee. she smiles and wiggles a lot. we'd like to think that it's because we smile and laugh a lot - that it's in some part a result of being born into a happy, upbeat household. though i'm sure a lot of it is simply her disposition. she grabs for things constantly. the other day she grabbed Lulu (our 75 lb black lab) by the fur on her forehead and crammed the dog's head into her tiny little mouth. then she made a terrible face, but didn't cry. apparently Lulu doesn't taste that good. Lulu didn't care, she's always happy for any kind of attention. we started rice cereal two days ago. i think she managed to swallowed some of it, even just accidentally. that was a lot of fun for me. she seemed only mildly interested in the process and definitely a good bit confused. she also needs A LOT of stimulation, so day care is working out well after all. she seems to get a lot out of it now. i only wish it was for 3-4 hours a day instead of 7-8 hours a day. i rush home every day after work to get her, so we can hang out. she loves to go places - anywhere - out to a restaurant, shopping, anything outdoors. she gets very bored at home. going outside seems to make her the happiest. we take her toys in the backyard and she's so much happier playing with the same toys outside but fusses when she's inside. she also loves to stand up and walk. she hates reclining and will only tolerate laying down to sleep. she seems to like getting her diaper changed, as it is an opportunity for her to play with her own feet. plus there's the Eat My Toes game. amazing, big personality. i am so fascinated by her. i never get bored being with her or watching her. here are some photos. she is the coolest thing ever. |
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did i mention her nickname is Turducken? |
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we also call her "The Turduck" for short. she got that nickname one day early on in her life. she born two weeks before thanksgiving and i was sitting on the couch nursing her and watching the Food Network. there was a special on about turduckens for thanksgiving. i looked down at her and thought to myself, she's a little turducken - plump and juicy. poor thing hasn't been sleeping well for the last week. she got sent home from day care with a fever yesterday. took her to the doctor this morning, turns out she has a nasty ear infection. no wonder she hasn't been sleeping. i thought she was just going through a poor sleeping phase, and was trying to cure it by getting her to eat more. we're all totally exhausted. but now we can treat it and hopefully all start sleeping again. |
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pass the baby sauce. |
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if you say to my daughter lengua fuera she will stick her tongue out and laugh. if you say to her perro negro she will "point" to our dog Lulu. my daughter kicks ass. |
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she's 9 months old already. she is such a happy, smiley, easy going baby. everything about her and everything about motherhood gets better and better every week. so much love, it's so huge, you never could imagine that it grows even bigger, how could there possibly be enough room in your heart for that much more love and you discover the volume of your heart expands magically, infinitely, as rapidly as the love grows and becomes more robust. there is nothing else in the world like it. i'm hoping to get permission to go part time at my job starting in the new year. i've begun taking steps toward that goal. as my daughter grows, and as i grow into motherhood, it's getting harder, not easier, to be away from her. she's in an awesome day care, which she clearly enjoys and her caregivers demonstrate to us all the time how much love and attention she gets there. plus it appears she is learning spanish. so i'm grateful for all of that. but i'm selfish and i miss her and enjoy her company and we're becoming more and more attached to one another. we all are, actually. i have a fucking kick ass family. |
in summer camp she learns a new rhyme every day. the other day it was the kill barney song. there's a large age range at camp so one of the 13 year old girls has taken a liking to her and is teaching her all kinds of playground trash talk. one of my favorites includes the phrase "see my pinkie, see my thumb, see my fist you better run." and "reeses pieces, seven up, mess with me and i'll mess you up. boo yah boo yah i say boo yah boo yah" |
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here's an awesome picture of my Turducken. |
We are in Lowell, Mass. We were supposed to fly out tonight but our first flight was canceled. I had to listen to "Canon in D" for over an HOUR as I was on hold while the Indian Call Center customer service people at Orbitz tried to deal with the airline to get me another flight out. Anyway, this was out first trip back to see Kazu's family since we announced Kazu's pregnancy, so there was a lot of hugs, handshakes, and congratulations. It's all definitely become much more real to me in the last couple of weeks. I'm really looking forward to becoming a father. |
Sem, you and Kazu will be awesome parents. "I'm really looking forward to becoming a father". Remember that when you pull an up all nighter,cause it gets better everyday. |
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here's a 24 second video of my daughter raising the roof. she's going to be one year old in a week! |
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happy birthday, Turducken! it's a six and a half minute movie -- six and a half minutes of your life that you can never get back, i understand, so if you can't spare six minutes, just fast forward to the last 55 seconds. |
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thanks! don't forget to turn your speakers on. |
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favorite part. Also, the gleeful swing film. |
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this morning i was doing TD's hair and she loves to play with the comb. she was dipping it in a glass of water and then sort of whipping it toward me and then toward senor. she thought this was very funny, and i let her do it so i could finish getting her hair in rubber bands. when i was done, dave went to take the glass of water away from her. she lunged for it, and said for the very first time, clear as day: MINE! and i was like, well, at least we know she's learning new words -- in English -- at her new Montessori school! and then it occurred to me that when #2 gets here i soon will hear that over and over and over until i think my eardrums will burst, then i'll have to pour myself a cocktail. happy mother's day, all you rad moms and grandmoms. |
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this morning she pointed at sesame street and said "big bird". her receptive language has been superb, but her expressive language is just now developing. the talking thing is very exciting. the caveman grunting and point is starting to wear on my nerves. |
i swear to god you watch that show even in the same room as mary jane and it forms some sort of mystical residue that cakes up on the insides of your head |
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I'll never forget back in the day I'd be sitting on the couch and R would be on one side of me and H on the other and they'd be going "my momma" no "MY Momma",fighting over mom. Now they're both married and when they fight,it's probably "your momma", no "YOUR MOMMA" or worse. This is the Toddler's Creed. If I want it, it's mine. If I give it to you and change my mind later, it's mine. If I can take it away from you, it's mine. If I had it a little while ago, it's mine. If it's mine it will never belong to anyone else no matter what. If we are building something together, all the pieces are mine. If it looks like mine, it's mine. From my experience this is soo true:) |
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my daughter is infinitely fascinating. i have no doubt that all children are as fascinating as my own, but mine is the only one i know so intimately. currently she is obsessed with books. the current rotation of favorites are: Go Dog, Go Barnyard Dance Where's Koa? Birthday Monsters Goodnight Moon (she likes to find and point to the mouse on each illustrated page) Goodnight Gorilla The Going To Bed Book she will sit on my lap or senor's lap for upward of an hour (which in toddler time may as well be an eternity) while we read to her. she selects her favorite books one at a time, and each one we have to read 3-5 times in a row. when she tires of a particular book, even if we're only halfway through, she'll close the book in mid-sentence, toss it aside, get up, and select another book. what amazes me is if i ask her, "Get the Barnyard Dance book", she will go through her stack of favorites that we keep under the coffee table until she finds Barnyard Dance. that she can distinguish them by title alone seems absolutely incredible to me. she's only 18 months old, and that skill seems quite incongruent with other, less mature manifestations of her development. |
have you ventured into any eric carl books? Highly recommend him. Reading is so critical at that age. It really pays off in my experience. Eva has always be so extremely thirsty for words, meanings and spellings and now that she's in kindergarten her skillset has just exploded in my mind. i mean, for example, last night we played clue. she kicked my ass and never once had any trouble saying any of the names of the rooms, characters or weapons. that may or may not be indicative of the early reading and writing skills, but you know...just sayin she's got mad clue skillz thats all. 2 other favs thats shes had since 2.....where the sidewalk ends and where the wild things are. |
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what happened? best of luck dougie. its like your 2/3rds up that big hill on a roller coaster. |
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yay Dougie, way to go! so happy for you! are you going to find out if it's a boy or girl? |
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well, i'd like to argue that it doesn't matter if you find out at 20 weeks or at 40 weeks, it's STILL VERY MUCH A SURPRISE!! |
Ian is finally starting to let us read books to him. Before we would start reading a book and he would cry and cry, only to be calmed by the sweet, warm glow of the television. Then Andy's mom brought us a book called "Ba Ba Ha Ha," which just had black and white pictures of faces and he loved it. Now he's starting to smile at "One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish." The best part about finding out the sex when the baby is born is that no one told us. My midwife just plopped him down on my chest and I found out myself. |
Congrats, Dougie! I have a book recommendation for you: "Be Prepared" http://www.beprepared.net/ |
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That book is really good. I plan to give it to my brother and male cousins when their time comes. |
Then again I'm getting senile. |
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http://tinyurl.com/phklxt |
Is this pregnancy any different/easier/harder? Rereading your experience with nausea made me realize just how ridiculously easy my pregnancy was. Sem might disagree, since there were nights I would only eat cheese and crackers and would call him at work demanding that he procure them for me. Or I would collapse on the couch moaning, "Halp wife. Water. With ice. And a splash of cranberry. AND A STRAW." Then there was the night I was so tired my arms hurt after folding laundry and I couldn't move from the couch. |
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i discovered today that the turducken can fucking count to ten! and she wasn't simply reciting words she had memorized, like with a song. she was actually counting big wooden beads. she's 21 months old. is that normal? |
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right, well i don't know if the TD is a genius or not. she has more words than i could count, but only speaks in two word sentences and the words aren't well formed. well, aside from "oh shit". she can say that very clearly. she does know about 5 colors, and she can sort shapes not just from her own set of blocks, but from any set of blocks put in front of her. she can also do all sorts of puzzles. the one she's into currently has about 30 pieces. and she can put on her own shoes, on the right feet, and get them velcroed. it's interesting how she will do something over and over and OVER until she figures it out. and now counting to ten. i find it all so fascinating. the learning happens so fast! she is amazing to me and continues to be a smiley, happy, funny, affectionate, independent, strong-willed toddler. just a joy to be around. |
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my turducken turns two years old tomorrow! |
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Boy time sure flys. |
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the turducken now can count to 12. what i mean is that she can count how many objects are in front of her, up to 12, or images in a book, giving each item one and only one number assignment. she can line up the numbers 0 through 10 in the right order. she can name the numbers when shown to her nonsequentially. we've known she can do this for a while, but her Montessori teacher just discovered this ability on Thursday, and noted to us that it is very unusual for a child her age to be able to do these things. her teacher also noted that her verbal skills are not that great. apparently she doesn't talk much at school, though she chatters and sings nursery rhymes almost nonstop at home. she didn't have many (or any?) English words at all until she started going to an English speaking preschool at 18 months. more and more we're finally starting to be able to understand what she's saying. she also asked to use the toilet for the first time today. she didn't deposit anything into the toilet, but wanted to. she made a "pssssssssssssssss" sound and then said "pee pee" and laughed. kids are cool. |
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just found out today - the turducken is getting moved up to the three year old classroom as soon as a spot becomes available. so yeah, not too worried about the talking thing. |
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today is Natalie's first birthday. it's so strange how, on some days i'm like, i want to quit my job and be a stay at home mom, and other days i'm thinking, thank fucking god for day care. and it's really got nothing at all to do with the kids. there's a fine line there, and i'm working on discovering it. ready or not here i come you can't hide |
I cant wait until the 1st birthday. with critter number two i find myself wanting to speed up the process at times. C is for Cookie |
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cooter and have the baby again. usually on the weekends. |
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I'm quoting Chris Rock when I write: You're either single and lonely or married and bored. |
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i am soooooo far from bored. that's just what Chris Rocks says. |
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we wouldnt be bored with LA. |
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my baby turned 4 years old today. pure joy, pure heartache. i really do wish, over and over, that i could freeze time. she is such a beautiful, smart little turducken, and her world is so full of wonder. i admit that there is a lot of "little sarah" that is coming along for the ride with her. the four year old sarah is definitely passing along to her all of the special things i can remember about being that age, and adding on to it all of things i wish i had had as well. parenting is so hard, and so fun, and so fulfilling. i wish i was 10 years younger and could have four more babies. minus the sleep deprivation and diapering. |
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the turducken starts kindergarten in two weeks. |
weeks. |
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crazy cakes. |
Be prepared to cry you two. |
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she is such a sweet soul, brimming over with love. she is very shy, and had extreme difficulty speaking up, even when it is necessary. she is graceful in every way. she is so perfect, it nearly hurts. |
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disneyworld with her only child, six year old sara helen. cute kid, but what got me was how happy my sister looked. keep on truckin' with turducken. |
disneyworld with her only child, six year old sara helen. cute kid, but what got me was how happy my sister looked. keep on truckin' with turducken. |
realized that she's a girl. The night before halloween she changed her mind from being a ninja to being Elsa from Frozen. (All Elsa costumes were sold out, unfortunately.) And over the weekend she obsessively watched youtube clips of Anna from Frozen kissing her romantic interest, Christoff. |
ago. |
ruining her life. guess i must be doing something right. |
tonight, but it turned out that a mouse ate all the cocoa butter. My wife saved the day by going to Whole Foods and buying more so we can make it in the morning. There was also a long discussion about which friends she would like to give lip balm to, focusing on which ones are always nice to her, and which ones are sometimes mean. |
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do you have any other kids? |
touch for her birthday, so now when she's not reading, she's texting, emailing, or face timing with her friends. One way in which it's handy is that she arranges her own playdates now. It makes my life a lot easier. |
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Oh, two girls, like me. 10 years old feels like a long way down the line, but i've been old otherwise. my girls are not at all technology savvy. they both have iPads and could care less about them. this is not a bragging point, since i've had no role in it. we've not tried to encourage or discourage. we're not trying to preserve innocence. there are plenty of apps and mindless games, which they've tinkered with and enjoyed, but not for very long. so the iPads, they just sit there. i use one of them to pull up recipes when i'm cooking. they don't care about the laptop either. playdates are getting really convenient. i get to drop them off! what a relief. |
matured a lot in the last year or so. We're about to send the older one off to overnight camp for the first time. She's pretty excited, and she's going to know a bunch of kids from her Sunday School, so the social thing won't be a huge shock. We'll also have two week with just her sister, (well, two half weeks, since we split custody with their mom), who is looking forward to being the only kid around, and is begging to have a friend sleep over while her sister is gone. |
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ha! I Can't Feel My Face is melting my brain cells. so Dougie, you have three? twins were not enough? mine are 6 and 7 - almost 8. i'd love to sit here and get caught up, but i'm being begged to play Sorry! |
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you got a puppy? that's just insane. our dogs are 10 and 11 years old, and i openly admit i'm ready for them to go over the rainbow. expensive fuckers - vet bills and food and picking up shit in the backyard. i don't even do the poop scooping, and i'm totally over dogs. no more dogs. when we were on vacation in late july, senor's best friend from high school, and his wife and two sons ages 10 and 12, came down to stay with us at the beach house for a night. the boys are way into comic books, as is senor. they talked for an hour or more about comic books and the history of comic book movies. the day after they left, senor half jokingly said to me, "i wish i could go see Ant Man with Paul's kids." it was the first time i got a glimpse into what the future might have looked like for him if we'd had a boy. not that our girls won't like comic books some day. they sort of already do. but nothing that senor's even remotely interested in. at least our eldest likes to watch football and tennis with him. |
And humans. What the fuck. What the fucking fuck. |
proceed and continue... |
My son is six as well. He loved Ant-Man and it's going to be a real special thing to take him to see a Star Wars movie in the theatre this year. I love you all, by the way. |
They went with their mom instead. They've been loving all movies Marvel so far. We're working our way through them. The small one has a crush on Thor, and wants to dress up as him for Halloween. Her sister is going as the Unbeatable Squirrel Girl, which means I have just over a month to create a giant furry tail. |
wants to go as Squirrel Girl. Did you know that Thor is a woman in the comics now? |
my nephew will graduate high school in rome next year, speaking more languages than i'll ever speak and knowing better things than i have in my head. this makes me happy. i love that kid. he's a dreamer. |
i'm going to sleep. stick this in your earholes. |
yet, and my daughter is firmly a fan of movie Thor. I locpve that her sister is learning about all the classic Marvel villains through seeing Squirrel Girl defeat them. I also love that the artist who draws Squirroe Girl lives near us and frequents the same comic shop. Mostly though, I love that my kids are reading good comics, and growing up sufficiently nerdy. |
while listening to roland kirk play "funk underneath." i found a picture of a cat reclining on a bed; behind him is a picture of "the book of the subgenius" propped up on the backboard. it was a mail art contribution from semillama. has anybody been reading about british prime minister david cameron? some ex-tory wrote a book claiming that, while he was at oxford, he once stuck and his penis in a dead pig's mouth and even smoked weed all night while listening to supertramp. |
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the prime minister did drugs and tinkered in weird sex stuff, maybe on a dare, maybe just out of curiosity. much like the rest of us. new research suggests that the adolescent brain reigns until about age 24. |
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that made me want to post it. |
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Dougie, guess what? Tequiza is back! http://bit.ly/1YKxuRd except they're calling it Oculto. |
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yeah oddly i remember very specific details about sorabjiites and conversations from a long time ago. meanwhile i try to forget most of everything i've ever posted before the year 2006. |
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mmmmmmm tequila. |
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i'm kind of a dick online. not proud of it. sometimes i totally fucking nailed it. i'm proud of those times. the internet doesn't need any more snark and criticism. it's tiresome. |
http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=LmnbRIK-w6M When I was in Dallas last year, I had tequila served with a Clamato chaser. First time I've willingly consumed Clamato, and I will freely admit that I liked it. I hope I'm not turning into my Gramps. If I start wearing those ugly pants with the four colored panels on them, you may disown me. |
melynda is tha captain. nobody can fuck with the captain's daughter. working on the new website. new album will be released soon. |
holy terror awesome. as a full grown man--- never forget that shit. |
downtown fort worth and finally had a close encounter with the guy wearing a dress who rides around town on a bike. i'd seen him from the bus a couple of times. by a close encounter i mean we were both on the sidewalk by a park--i was rolling one way, he the opposite--and we passed each other within a couple of feet. with my poor eyesight, i didn't know it was him until he was pretty close. he was in a floral dress, sleeveless with a plunging neckline. never noticed it before, but he must wear a padded bra. he always accessorizes with a necklace and earrings. he was also wearing a gimme cap, which seemed strange. the man himself--and i say man because i don't think this is a transgender thing--is tall and athletically built with short hair. in men's clothes he would probably look uber-white ex-military. i immediately broke into a smile and nodded to him. he glanced at me quickly and rode on. despite "going public," i think this is still just his private thing. i checked the web to see if there's any mention of him. i found only one matter-of-fact exchange on reddit. which, for some reason, i can't create a link for. https://www.reddit.com/r/FortWorth/comments/17cuhk /guy_riding_bike_wearing_a_dress/ |
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because i was so totally self-absorbed and attention-needy and boring. though you must admit - i did have a few good one- liners. becoming a mother has humbled me and made me the person i always thought i could never be. the selflessness of mothering has extended to the nooks and crannies of my life. i'm just nicer. |
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GOD DAMN IT Hi, dave. Hi everyone. |
we found out Spunky died. i haven't checked the boards in a couple weeks... and i dropped in just now, and here you are. how are you? where are you? what's new? (thanks, dave.) |
And sorry for the boring update -- not a whole lot is new with me! Same town, same job, same life circumstance. The exciting thing on the horizon is that next September I'm going to Finland and Russia on one of those riverboat cruises, with my dad. We'll be staying in Helsinki for three days, taking the train to St. Petersburg (one of my travel life goals -- The Church on the Spilled Blood and Dostoevsky's grave, here I come), and then following the Volga River to Moscow, arriving just a week before the 99th anniversary of the October Revolution. I CANNOT WAIT. I never saw the appeal of the whole riverboat cruise thing, but my dad went on a Danube River cruise last year from Budapest to Amsterdam, and he (world traveller) said it was the best trip he's ever taken, because the ordeal of transportation and lodging is taken care of. This is probably the only way I could ever travel to Russia, because I'm too intimidated to navigate the language, culture, and hellacious driving conditions to go there on my own. The only way I was able to afford the trip was because we got two reservations for the price of one for booking so far in advance, the reservations include airfare, and I saved the money my mother left me after she died. I'll probably never get to do anything like this again in my life. (Although I'm dying to go on the Smithsonian's Viking History tour, since they take you to the Orkney and Shetland Islands, which seem like too much of a hassle to arrange travel there as an individual person. And of course, being Smithsonian sponsored, you travel with historians/experts from whom you learn so much.) |
My boss here is currently on medical leave and may not be coming back, because this summer she discovered she has aggressive brain cancer (glioblastoma -- median survival rate of ~15 months; 5-year survival rate of ~4%), at the age of 55. In retrospect, she was having symptoms of memory loss, aphasia, and confusion since this past spring, but since English isn't her first language and (to be honest) she's always been pretty dippy, I and none of our coworkers noticed. She only went to the doctor after having bad headaches for a month. It's just awful. But enough about that -- how are you, sarah? :) What is your favorite aspect of your life right now? What is the last book you read that you loved? |
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since 1980. no wait, i saw the one with the sith(?). was chewbacca in that? i liked the translator: uughghhhgh uughghhhgh raaaaaahhgh wrrhw! |
required that I had to complete it tonight. I was hoping for more of warm temperature for awhile. I was else looking for some courses for next year. |
binks in the act. |
wasn't in the movie i saw. doesn't matter. what kind of courses? |
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