slowly, but surely, I am dying Drunken ramblings: slowly, but surely, I am dying

By Pink on Monday, September 27, 1999 - 04:51 am:

    It's true. I know I am. I work in a lab. I have access to every test we know. That's the best part of working in the health care system, I can do my own testing! It's free. Anyway, my body is taking a beating. My ALT level is high and my Uric Acid level is elevated. In layman's terms: the ALT level, being high, is a sure sign of liver necrosis...meaning my liver is taking a whooping. The Uric Acid elevation states that Gout is on the way. Both are definite signs of alcoholism.

    I don't know why I would relay this onto you guys. I'm not looking for pity...maybe a little prevention for you. I thought I was indestructible, nothing could bring me down. I was wrong. After years of ingesting too many drugs, too much, waaaay too much booze, I thought I was a lifer. A poster child for those who have been there with me and before me. It isn't true anymore. I'm just pathetic.

    I can only hope to get out of this funk. I don't hate myself. I can't operate on a "sober" level. I don't go into work drunk, not lately. I don't feel like I can connect with any emotion without being tanked. Sad to say. The "juice" has taken over. Every week, I state that I WILL refuse to indulge. Never happens. So the cycle goes.

    It's just all too real. I may be dying by leaps and bounds, or little by little. I don't have the drive to stop it.

By J on Monday, September 27, 1999 - 12:34 pm:

    Welcome to my world Pink. I think if I sobered up,I,d have a nervous break down

By Swine on Monday, September 27, 1999 - 12:49 pm:


    i need a drink.

By Waffles on Monday, September 27, 1999 - 01:23 pm:

    pour me one while yer at it......................

    so i can accept my fate with the usual skewed sense of reality

By Droopy on Monday, September 27, 1999 - 01:53 pm:

    i have a cousin in his late 50's who has been drinking hard since he was in high school, and he's only just now gotten around to having his big toe amputated because of gout and diabetes. you all have plenty of time.


By Waffles on Monday, September 27, 1999 - 02:21 pm:

    wtf is gout?

By J on Monday, September 27, 1999 - 04:42 pm:

    A man goes to the doctor,he asks the doctor, "Am I going to live to be 100?"The doctor asks him,Do you smoke or drink?"The man says,"No,Ive never done either"The doctor ask,s him,"Do you gamble,drive fast,or hang around with wild women?"The man says,"No,I,ve never done any of that either."The doctor says,"Then why do you want to live to be a hundred?

By Fetidbeaver on Monday, September 27, 1999 - 05:46 pm:

    Gout is a painful joint and tissue disease but is very treatable. (uricosurics ie; Allopurinal, Probenecid, Sulfinpyrazone)

    Pink, what was your ALT and what type of test was it based on? Many other factors can cause an elevation including biliary obstruction, mononucleosis. false positive d/t drug use including aspirin. Try doing an AST. (ALT is less sensitive in the dx of alcoholic liver disease)

    Also these all could be elevated with Leukemia. Don't write yourself off based on one lab. If in fact you do end up with severe hepatic damage then detoxification will be compromised, then you will need less of whatever your drug of choice is to remain intoxicated. (good news?)

By Clint on Tuesday, September 28, 1999 - 06:55 am:

    are you familiar with Amanda Marshall?
    She has 2 albums out and if you don't have them and want a "serious" emotion rush...head on down to local record store..

By Swine on Tuesday, September 28, 1999 - 08:54 am:

    man, you're wasted.

    gee isn't even in here.

    and go easy with that trigger finger, buddy.

By Gee on Wednesday, September 29, 1999 - 03:12 am:

    Oh, Clint, this has to stop. I thought you were My Clint, but you're not. Please, you must stop this obsessive behavior. I don't love you. I love Clint from California who held the taxi door open for me and reminded me not to forget my bag when I was getting on the airport bus. You could never do these things for me. I'm sorry, but it can never be. Please, try to get on with your life.

    ps...Amanda Marshall is neat.

By heather on Wednesday, September 29, 1999 - 03:14 pm:

    thinking about your insides...

    i found this website while i was discussing life and pain with my gall bladder

By Warhead on Thursday, September 30, 1999 - 08:57 am:

    Don't waste good spirits...
    Shoot yourself in the fuckin cranium!

By Waffles on Thursday, September 30, 1999 - 12:16 pm:

    he look its fuckface everybody!

By Antigone on Thursday, September 30, 1999 - 10:07 pm:

    I think he should shoot himself in your cranium, Warhead. That's what a good Buddhist solipsist would do.

By Gee on Friday, October 1, 1999 - 02:46 am:

    What just happened here? I think I missed something. Curse me for blinking!! (shakes fist)

By J on Friday, October 1, 1999 - 03:12 pm:

    Warhead is very hostile,Waffles and Antigon are showing him or her whats up.

By Antigone on Friday, October 1, 1999 - 09:10 pm:

    Or it.

By The Watcher on Monday, September 10, 2001 - 02:35 pm:

    I am falling apart.

    I'm forty six years old and tomorrow I'm having cataract surgery.

    I'm more nervous about this one than any of the others I've had. Accept the first one I remember.

    After all it is my eye they will be cutting on.

By J on Monday, September 10, 2001 - 04:00 pm:

    It will be alright:)

By The Watcher on Monday, September 10, 2001 - 04:09 pm:

    Thanks J I needed that:-)

By J on Monday, September 10, 2001 - 05:43 pm:

    I had an RK a few years ago,just make sure you have someone with you to drive you home.

By pez on Tuesday, September 11, 2001 - 01:25 am:

    at least two of my grandparents and my (late) great-grandmother had cataract surgery, and they were all fine.

    the only danger is if you wait too long, because then nothing can be done and you'll e blind in at least one eye.

By Czarina on Tuesday, September 11, 2001 - 09:27 am:

    It'll be alright,otherwise,you wouldn't be able to call yourself "The Watcher".

    We're pulling for you!

By The Watcher on Thursday, September 13, 2001 - 01:05 pm:

    I have survived my surgery.

    I can't read to well at the moment. So my postings might not be to legible for a while.

    I was in the surgery centers waiting room when I first heard about the WTC. A man next to me got a call on his cell phone and I thought "Oh my God, just what I need some idiot yacking while I'm trying to com down".

    He said his daughter worked in the WTC. But, she was in Boston that day. It didn't mean anything to me until I came out of surgery and heard what had happened.

By Spiral on Thursday, September 13, 2001 - 04:25 pm:

    I'm glad you're okay. All this has turned into a
    Kennedy-like thing... Ask anyone alive when he was
    shot and they can tell you where they were or what
    they were doing...

    "I was (insert location/action) when the WTC went

    This is just plain scary. I feel lost.

By The Watcher on Thursday, September 13, 2001 - 05:31 pm:

    That's a weird coincidense. I was home from school with a cold the day Kennedy was shot.

By The masked masquerade on Friday, September 14, 2001 - 07:03 pm:

    speaking of that! watch "The House of Yes" you will more than likely enjoy it very much.

By wisper on Saturday, September 15, 2001 - 01:39 pm:

    that great.

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