what do you think of god?


sorabji.com: What is your definition of Heaven?: what do you think of god?
THIS IS A READ-ONLY ARCHIVE FROM THE SORABJI.COM MESSAGE BOARDS (1995-2016).

By
Lynda on Tuesday, August 24, 1999 - 09:16 am:

    i think god as an invisable force and as us as his puppets and god pulling all the strings?


By Friendly on Tuesday, August 24, 1999 - 09:46 am:

    would those be invisible strings? god must really be into puppets. like totally obsessed with puppets. all the other invisible force people probably think god's a real wierdo. hey, here comes that guy with all those stinky puppets.


By Kalliope on Tuesday, August 24, 1999 - 10:18 am:

    no way man. god is a puppet and ive got him by the strings.


By Jinafishes on Tuesday, August 24, 1999 - 12:09 pm:

    God is very sarcastic. Is he British?


By Kalliope on Tuesday, August 24, 1999 - 12:54 pm:

    Actually God is a stuffed pound puppy I got when I was 5. I used to sleep with him at night, and use him as a pillow.

    The Holy Ghost on the other hand, he's a force to be reckoned with. I once watched him eat and entire cooked pig by himself.

    Jesus? He's a crazy ol coot. Always attending beat poetry slams and walking around in that nutty old berret. Oh. I saw him perform strip poetry in Chicago once. Yea, good ol' Christ was up there banging away on 'Howl'.


By Nate on Tuesday, August 24, 1999 - 02:12 pm:

    stop talking about jesus's coot.

    i think we're all gods, and the puppets are invisible.


By Kalli on Tuesday, August 24, 1999 - 03:23 pm:

    Jesus has a pretty coot. I'd do him.


By Swine on Tuesday, August 24, 1999 - 03:39 pm:

    christ's coochie is five inches deeper than yours.


By Nate on Tuesday, August 24, 1999 - 04:06 pm:

    i have the depth of every woman i've been with marked by a line tattoo'd to the side of my cock.


By Silly on Friday, August 27, 1999 - 10:13 am:

    Got any pictures of that?


By Nate on Friday, August 27, 1999 - 02:06 pm:

    sure.


By J on Friday, August 27, 1999 - 04:21 pm:

    Then send them to Margret,Jim,and I,I know Gee is gone now,but I,m sure she,d want to take a gander,so would,oh hell just post them


By Nate on Friday, August 27, 1999 - 05:08 pm:

    i only send the pic to prospectives who think they could add a new mark that would be further from the head than any of the current.


By Waffles on Friday, August 27, 1999 - 05:13 pm:

    jim may be able to help you with that....Jim?



By Moon on Friday, August 27, 1999 - 11:23 pm:

    I was gonna comment but its probably better not to


By Gee on Friday, September 3, 1999 - 05:32 am:

    I went through all that and there isn't even a comment on the end?! What a rip-off! First no penis, then no comment! The injustice of it all!! I plan to sue this entire establishment! I'll have all your jobs!!


By Jinafishes on Friday, September 3, 1999 - 11:53 am:

    When you die, your body dies first.
    You'll have a few seconds to think in the dark, before your brain dies as well.


By J on Friday, September 3, 1999 - 02:16 pm:

    I,m not going to like having time to realize I,m dead.


By Im back lynda on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 09:21 am:

    Hi it's lynda thanks people for replying to my theroy i am glad that other people like myself have their their own thoughts what i am trying to say is i think that god is our hopes and dreams please e-mail me back again soon.


By Jinafishes on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 11:21 am:

    God needs an e-mail address.


By GOD on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 11:33 am:


By J on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 12:01 pm:

    Dear God, Is it true that you ride the bus,that your a slob like us?Are you a woman?Will I go to hell?Could you make Floyd go away?Did you know your son is going around winking at everyone?Could you have a talk with him? Love. You know,your God


By Rhiannon on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 12:21 pm:

    I once read a poem that had the image of someone dancing with God while the angels played in the orchestra. I really like that image.


By GOD on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 12:43 pm:

    Yes, yes, yes, no, yes (but I'm not going to just yet), yes, sure and ditto.


By J on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 01:09 pm:

    Dear God,Are those two people I hate going to hell?


By Jinafishes on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 01:19 pm:

    And the voice of God, he's brilliant over the microphone. And the radios in Heaven, could make a heathen feel at home. All these notes flying out playing havoc with my heart. Every word sung is both emotional and smart. And there's a gorgeous sunset, happening on the airwaves. I really want you to hear this song one day so you behave.


By GOD on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 01:23 pm:

    Yes my dear J, they are. I've already spoken with the Devil himself to make sure their eternity of torture will be the worst ever.


By Wavydave on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 01:28 pm:

    read "The Great Divorce" by C.S. Lewis.

    Even if you're not a "religious" person (I hate that designation) it's a really cool look at what heaven/hell could be like.
    And it's not a big, thick book - prob take someone a day's reading to finish it.


By J on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 01:38 pm:

    Thank You Lord!!I love you!!!:)


By Jinafishes on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 01:51 pm:

    I always get CS Lewis and Carroll Lewis mixed up, but Alice in Wonderland is really cool, Through The Looking Glass is just beyond fucked up. I love it. Maybe someday I'll read the Chronicles of Narnia. And Catcher in the Rye. Again.


By GOD on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 02:01 pm:

    Hey, I love you too! Us women have to stick together, you know!?


By J on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 02:10 pm:

    We listen to you God,do we get wings?If so,do they come in colors?


By Jesus on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 02:11 pm:

    uh??


By GOD on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 02:17 pm:

    Yes, and you get to pick the color. Any color you want. You can even make up a color if you want to. And you know what the people who go to hell get? A red hot burning piece of coal shoved right up their ass daily. =


By Wavydave on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 02:21 pm:

    Sorry, but i gotta say that the "special P" alt-0222 mouth looks goofy.

    =0) <--as goofy as that


By GOD or shouldnt it be GODDESS on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 02:28 pm:

    I like goofy


By J on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 03:23 pm:

    Dear God,Swine,s running around here shooting us,why don,t I feel dead?


By GOD on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 03:29 pm:

    Because he's shootin' blanks...


By Nate on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 03:40 pm:

    goofy isnot a dog.


By Pamela on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 03:44 pm:

    nope
    =


By Rhiannon on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 03:45 pm:

    Dear God, what sort of activities do you have planned for us in heaven? If I'm going to be there for all eternity, I don't want to get bored.


By Waffles on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 04:06 pm:

    "goofy isnot a dog."

    this is worth gettin in the cage for


By J on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 04:33 pm:

    It,s snot burgers,not snot dogs!!


By GOD on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 05:16 pm:

    Dear Rhiannon,

    Heaven is pretty much a free for all. You get to do pretty much whatever you want, except no one can wear clothes. There's lots of sex and self-indulgence going on. We have ice cream, especially b&j's. Chocolate is in abundance too.

    Oh yeah, heaven is located in Northern California by the way. I'm thinking of recruiting Nate as God when I step down, even though he is a guy.


By Waffles on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 05:21 pm:

    you may think it's funny but it snot


By J on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 05:45 pm:

    Thats a good one waffles,God,I,d like Lavender wings that sparkle,is there cheesecake up there?


By GOD on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 06:01 pm:

    J -- Yes, you can have sparkly lavender wings and yes we have cheesecake. The real good kind.


By Nate on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 06:08 pm:

    god made MAN in HIS image.

    goddamnit, read your own fucking book.


By J on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 06:16 pm:

    You got a Methodist coloring book and you color very well,but don,t you color out of the lines,cause God will send you to hell


By Swine on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 06:16 pm:

    the road to heaven is walked through a will to porcinity.


By God on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 06:29 pm:

    Yeah, but that was the original God... He screwed things up so I had to take over.


By Semillama on Thursday, September 16, 1999 - 07:34 pm:

    Jehovah-1 is a space alien and still threatens this planet.


    Just me and God, Watching Scotty die....(right back atcha j)


By Jinafishes on Friday, September 17, 1999 - 12:20 pm:

    I want sparkly lavendar wings! Specially if they smelled like lavendar. And wispy, wild brown hair.


By Waffles on Friday, September 17, 1999 - 12:36 pm:

    i have god in my pants


By GOD on Friday, September 17, 1999 - 12:49 pm:

    Sure Jinafishes, you got it. And Waffles, you wish I were in your pants <wink>


By Waffles on Friday, September 17, 1999 - 01:21 pm:

    who are you? And if you are GOD, and your love is everywhere, you are in my pants whether you like it or not,


By Simon on Friday, September 17, 1999 - 01:59 pm:

    The wager offer stands. I won't step into the cage until a bet lands on the table.


By Nate on Friday, September 17, 1999 - 02:08 pm:

    i can't make a wager until there is a defined and agreed upon method of verification of the resultant answer.


By ML on Friday, September 17, 1999 - 02:09 pm:

    Impasse


By Nate on Friday, September 17, 1999 - 02:14 pm:

    FUCK THE FRENCH!


By Simon on Friday, September 17, 1999 - 02:17 pm:

    Propose an arbiter, whose decision on the evidence presented will be final. I'm sure you can come up with a choice I'd agree upon.


By Nate on Friday, September 17, 1999 - 02:30 pm:

    well, ever since walt died...


By Waffles on Friday, September 17, 1999 - 03:28 pm:

    ...the world has goine to hell and back and then they took Jim....what will they thingk of next


By Gee on Friday, September 17, 1999 - 06:55 pm:

    darnit!! Just grab a friggin' ice pick and start hacking!! buncha pansies.


By Agatha on Friday, September 17, 1999 - 11:57 pm:

    i just found out today that my bosses are jehovah's witnesses. my first impulse was to go back in my mind and catalog how many things i have said in the past two months that would most definitely have offended them. it's a good thing that they are nice people.


By J on Saturday, September 18, 1999 - 06:38 am:

    Oh,Agatha,Lordy,Lordy!


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