Sentences from somewhere or other that struck you as somehow, well worth posting to this topic.


sorabji.com: Words: Sentences from somewhere or other that struck you as somehow, well worth posting to this topic.
THIS IS A READ-ONLY ARCHIVE FROM THE SORABJI.COM MESSAGE BOARDS (1995-2016).

By Nelly on Sunday, May 9, 1999 - 05:35 pm:

    Maybe you read them somewhere. Maybe you can remember where. Maybe not. Maybe they just occur spontaneously in your brain.

    "As soon as she realized that lobster was not in the offing, she became sulky and uncommunicative."


By TBone on Monday, May 10, 1999 - 12:26 pm:

    I'd rather have this bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy. (how profound, wizard!)


By Agatha on Monday, May 10, 1999 - 12:28 pm:

    start keeping track of shocks from static electricity. never mind why."

    "close cover before striking."

    "do not distribute these matches or tobacco products to minors."


By R.C. on Monday, May 10, 1999 - 02:10 pm:


    "Objects in the mirror are closer than they appear."


By R.C. on Monday, May 10, 1999 - 02:11 pm:


    "Objects in the mirror are closer than they appear."


By Nate on Monday, May 10, 1999 - 02:39 pm:

    "Objects in the mirror are closer than they appear."


By Nateo on Monday, May 10, 1999 - 02:41 pm:

    "Los objetos en el espejo estan mas cercanos que aparecen."


By Swine on Monday, May 10, 1999 - 02:41 pm:

    "Possible side effects are drowsiness, nausea, and triple-vision."


By Nateux on Monday, May 10, 1999 - 02:42 pm:

    "les objets dans le miroir sont plus etroits qu'ils apparaissent."


By Bagpuss on Monday, May 10, 1999 - 03:31 pm:

    "I don't believe in an interventionist God"


By Margret on Monday, May 10, 1999 - 04:58 pm:

    I want to take this one as my Native name when I head back to Oklahoma with my documentation, or alternately use it in a novel:
    "Snow Plows Turning"
    Isn't it lyrical? It's descriptive, but if snow were able to plow it would also be a complete sentence.
    Nevermind.


By Liz on Monday, May 10, 1999 - 05:31 pm:

    "I see more of what's going on around me because I am unconcerned with finding a parking space"


By R.C. on Monday, May 10, 1999 - 05:59 pm:

    Oohhhh -- Nate's a polyglot!

    I swear/I find new reasons to love you every fucking DAY, Natorious!


By Semillama on Monday, May 10, 1999 - 07:07 pm:

    "veni vici V.D."

    should be printed on every condom...


By Sarah on Monday, May 10, 1999 - 09:43 pm:

    "Here's the thing: I wear what I want and dig on what I want and eat what I want and feel sexy all the time anyway. And it's not necessarily good, 'cause part of it is because I treat my body like a meatmobile, like it exists only to get my super sexy funky wowzers brain around."


By MoonUnit on Tuesday, May 11, 1999 - 12:41 am:

    Save the whales, collect the whole set


By Bagpuss on Tuesday, May 11, 1999 - 02:08 am:

    "The caller withheld their number"


By Bagpuss on Tuesday, May 11, 1999 - 02:09 am:

    "This program is protected by US and International copyright laws as described in the about box"


    The about box - aren't the 90s GREAT


By MoonUnit on Tuesday, May 11, 1999 - 04:43 am:

    For Distribution Only with a New PC


By Slacker on Tuesday, May 11, 1999 - 05:01 am:

    i can't believe it's not butter.

    or a goose in the head!!


By Nate on Tuesday, May 11, 1999 - 12:03 pm:

    "Oohhhh -- Nate's a polyglot!"


By Swine on Tuesday, May 11, 1999 - 12:50 pm:

    "murder is only foreplay when you're hot for revenge."


By Swine on Tuesday, May 11, 1999 - 01:00 pm:

    "el asesinato es solamente foreplay cuando usted es caliente para la venganza."


By Swine on Tuesday, May 11, 1999 - 01:01 pm:

    i blow polysnot.


By Cone on Tuesday, May 11, 1999 - 02:14 pm:

    title of a painting by Clyde Broadway:

    "After making him learn to talk funny, the fear of regionalism drives Billy Bob Buonarotti all the way to New York City, where he often changes his name."


By Orbital on Tuesday, May 11, 1999 - 04:50 pm:

    "I don't KNOW you people"


By Stalkee on Tuesday, May 11, 1999 - 05:21 pm:

    "This isn't an ultimatum, but baby, I know where you live"


By Nate on Tuesday, May 11, 1999 - 06:41 pm:

    "it's great that you really care about me and not just whether blood is coming out of my vagina. It's great that you called last night to check up on me while I was hyperventilating and alone."


By Jon on Tuesday, May 11, 1999 - 07:31 pm:

    "The F.A.A. exempts all domestic carriers (not just America West) from damages incurred as a result of cancelled or delayed flights. This includes things like missed meetings, lost wages, hotel rooms, phone calls, etc. The reason for this exemption is that the F.A.A. feels that if air carriers were forced to guarentee flight schedules, you'd see unsafe aircraft in the air... and safety is everyone's number one concern."


By Gee on Wednesday, May 12, 1999 - 05:04 am:

    "Why do I always have to be the fulcrum?"

    "Excuse me... I'm looking for a Detective Armani?"

    "Who carries an unloaded gun? Would I carry an unloaded gun? Would anybody I know carry an unloaded gun? What do they shoot people with in Canada, serviettes?"

    "You just felt that his nose was so offensive that you decided to pursue and arrest him?"

    "Why? What are you gonna do? Tell him to surrender or you're gonna eat something off the curb?"

    "That's supposed to mean something in Canadian, isn't it?"


By Gee Rennie on Wednesday, May 12, 1999 - 05:32 am:

    "Get off me, EXCLAMATION MARK!!!!"

    "How to become a Canadian in 10 easy steps: step 1..get a big hat; step 2.. lick electrical sockets..."

    "Do not touch my inner thigh and calf!"

    "But at no time did they say you'll be working with a Mountie who's got a wolf that's a florist."

    "I repeat myself under stress, I repeat myself under stress."

    "On the inside, I'm a poet. On the outside, mmph, shake bad guy, shake."

    "Beat it before I jump Bogart all over you."

    "Fraser just once I'd like to say, rack that bad boy, and cover me."

    "I will beat you to death with this empty gun."

    "Bob...how do you spell that?"

    "Those kids are immature."

    "You fart hammers pull those weapons in Chicago..."

    "You know, Ray, it's sad. It's sad and it's pathetic to see a grown man gloat over besting a dog."

    "The turtle and the wolf are natural enemies, Fraser!"

    "I can't go to jail, the food, the conversation, the sexual hi-jinx. I can't handle it."

    "Oh yes, I believe you are going to hell in a handcart."

    "I'm going to go out there and try my best and try not to play with myself."

    "That man's rhythm on a stick."

    "You gotta push through the cold and the pain and keep moving, 'cause that's what partnership's
    all about. There's red ships and green ships but no ships like partnership."


By Hard Core Gee on Wednesday, May 12, 1999 - 05:35 am:

    "When you're shiny, everyone wants to stand next to you."

    "You can make even bad sex good."

    "That's not buddies."

    [Bruce and Noel are incredibly hung over and doing auditions for "Hard Core Logo"]:
    "The hours dribble by. The head clears. We've seen several possible callbacks but no one who simply exudes the essence of any of the four band members. Until late in the afternoon, when we finally see an actor who does. Tall, blond, angular, unconventionally handsome, in his thirties. But it's much more than looks that strike us, it's the details of his attitude, his personal style. Unlike all the others he wears brown, not black, and in a way that suggests he knows what he's doing when he opens his closet in the morning. There is no 'uniform,' and he's not putting on any misconceived punk airs. Quite the opposite. There's something spaced-out and fragile about him, yet also something subtly impertinent and fuck-you in the way he refuses to slate himself properly for the camera. He's got a wicked smile. His name is Callum Rennie, he's reading for Billy, and I know he's our man before he reads a word." (From Hard Core Roadshow)


By VMS on Saturday, May 15, 1999 - 07:00 am:

    Infinite Loop Detected


By Dave on Saturday, May 15, 1999 - 01:29 pm:

    when the who hits the what
    and you've run out of luck.

    you do what you can
    but you're all
    in a word
    stuck.

    fuck.




    the hoot of an owl in the dreams of a mouse


By Margret on Saturday, May 15, 1999 - 08:37 pm:

    The more I look at it, the more I like it. I do think it's good. The fact is the more I study it, the more I take it apart, the more I break it down, it remains consistent. I wish you were here to see it!

    Thanks Gee.


By Sarah on Sunday, May 16, 1999 - 03:43 pm:


    Say it with COOKIES!






By Reknball on Monday, May 17, 1999 - 01:02 am:

    "Scuse me, while I kiss the sky."


By Gee on Tuesday, May 18, 1999 - 04:28 am:

    "Give me Homicide or give me death."

    Russert: "So you prefer quantity to quality?"
    Munch: "All junkies do."

    "'Homicide: Life on Sesame Street' ... "This show contains adult content and is brought to you by the letter 'H'."


By R.C. on Tuesday, May 18, 1999 - 01:30 pm:

    I can't believe this is their last season. Looks like Andre Braugher left at a good time.

    And "Law & Oder" is going off the air too!

    Guess I can finally hock my t.v. set now...


By Rhiannon on Wednesday, May 19, 1999 - 05:29 pm:

    "The insulation on your soul is so thin that you finally discovered you had one and its back is broken."
    --Henry Rollins



    [You know, Homicide just wasn't the same for me after Kay left. And when Pembleton and Kellerman left, I thought, what's the use of watching anymore? All the new people were awfully annoying. So I'm a lot less sad than I thought I'd be.]


By Semillama on Wednesday, May 19, 1999 - 06:22 pm:

    From my favorite defunct punk band, the Muldoons:

    What's the use of having freedom of speech when all I ever seem to say is "Hey, I'm thirsty"?

    I need machines to do everything for me, I even have one that pours sugar on the floor.

    Gonna buy me a shotgun, and start a cemetary of my own.

    I know this is not the end of the world, it's just a cliff, and I'll get over it but first I need a lift.

    THe sun is out and the grass is shining and I know that Every coffin has a satin lining.

    I wish the ground would face the other way.

    I'm just not used to seeing water flow in that direction.

    They say you can't see the forest for the trees, go up in an airplane, I hope you crash.

    I can finally see the light at the end of the barrel.

    This is the first time, and there's not a first time for everything.



By Rhiannon on Wednesday, May 19, 1999 - 07:29 pm:

    Those are great! Especially "gonna buy me a shotgun..."



    From my favorite defunct no-wave/industrial band, Cop Shoot Cop (and I promise I'll shut up about them after this):

    Tell me a lie but make sure it's a good one. If there's one thing I like it's cheap entertainment.

    Punch the clock, kick the clock, face the Muzak.

    I swear that I'd give up the drink if I could find a better way to get drunk.

    Don't think I won't skin you when your skin is all that's left.

    I despise the ground you walk upon.

    And Santa, he is bleeding, some punk shot him in the eye.

    The clouds outside your windowpane resemble crippled children limping across the sky.

    Murder gets to sounding like a kind of inner peace.

    So I spent my evening wishing I never was born, drinking toasts to that hood with the hooves and the horns.

    We ain't deaf yet but we sure is dumb.

    Eggs for rib, I don't get it! [it just sounds good]

    If I mentioned love, I take it back. I saw your heart and it was black. I finally found out what you lack, and that's a soul.






    And from Firewater:

    Time carves initials into the prison of your face.

    Baby, if you were drowning I'd throw you a funeral wreath.

    I ain't seen a pastor since Sunday bloody morning. All the girls in the choir are in labor or mourning.


By Semillama on Wednesday, May 19, 1999 - 09:03 pm:

    muldoons:

    i thought that we would never meet again, and when we met again, I wished that we had never met again.

    You don't make me feel much fun to be around. I'm on Earth, what are you on?

    ok, no more muldoons unless requested.

    this is particularly relevant to me:

    "Show me the way to go home, I'm tired and I want to go to bed. I had a little drink about an hour ago and it's gone right to my head."


By Dave on Wednesday, May 19, 1999 - 09:25 pm:

    Are Muldoons similar to MTX?


By Swine on Wednesday, May 19, 1999 - 11:23 pm:

    just read one of the other threads around here...
    and this lyric kept going through my head:

    "twenty-four twenty-four hours to go... i wanna be sedated."

    good thing relief is just a point-and-click away.


By Reknball on Thursday, May 20, 1999 - 02:10 am:

    " I remember laying in the gutter, and looking at my leg laying out in the middle of the road beside an old beer can and thinkin' to myself............I wonder if theres any beer in that can?"


By Gee on Thursday, May 20, 1999 - 04:53 am:

    "A man in Milan had full-blown AIDS. He robbed 11 banks one summer. Each time they caught him. Each time they let him go. You know, the Italian are experts at 'Live and let live'."

    "When in Rome, do as the Romans do. When in Baltimore, do as I tell you to."

    "I'm surrounded by fools and assassins."

    "Bodies fall every day in Baltimore. Bodies fall here, bodies fall there. Just once a body falls with lingerie on, and it's found in a dumpster in a gay neighborhood, and the whole world is in a frenzy!"

    "I love the sugar cookies, don't you? The holiday spirit...it lingers on."

    "I don't know how things ran un auto, but in this hive, I'm the Queen Bee. In the middle of a redball I need to know that my workers are making honey."

    "If the Devil is behind this, I want him in the box!"

    "I don't have time to be subtle."

    (all Gee quotes. BTW, Homicide was a steller show, but this last season -except for maybe the last two episodes- was really a waste of time. Too much of Tom freaking Fontana's unskilled girlfriend hogging up the TV and too little time spent on quality writing. Kellerman rocked in the begining -and kinda in that two parter he did-, but once they started the whole "Is Mikey a dirty cop?" story they soiled his character. Kay was the best girl on that show, and it angers me that they made her so boring by sticking her behind a desk before writing the character out. Geeze. I pick the strangest things to get angry about. I heard a rumor Barry Levinson was talking to NBC about moving the show to another network. It was supposedly in some paper. I dunno. Today on Bravo! Mikey wanted to off himself, but Meldrick saved his patooty. That Reed Diamond is one talented little cookie.)

    "Screw the dead. What have their moldering asses ever done for me?"

    (Mike Kellerman. rough quote.)


By Gee on Thursday, May 20, 1999 - 04:55 am:

    ps....Since when is Law & Order cancelled? As far as I heard, the new guy (whatsisname? Curtis? He'll always be the new guy to me.) was leaving and that guy Ally McBeal was chasing after on her show is stepping into his shoes.


By PetRock on Thursday, May 20, 1999 - 07:50 am:

    Free China! (Silverware 1/2 off)

    Lambros was forced implanted with brain control implants that monitor and control Lambros' mental functions, thoughts, and deeds by Brazilian Government Officials (excerpt from mail received from Leavenworth Prison)

    I wish you luck with a capital 'F'....


By Margret on Thursday, May 20, 1999 - 11:06 am:

    Oh my god, Meldrick is the one I finally settled on in the lottery of my Homicide lust. You know, I really like Yaphet Kotto, but I remember him too well as Mr. Big from "Live and Let Die," and I just can't get hot for him. Then Andre Braugher is so over the top talented, but I really worship that, and when I worship there's no room in my heart for lust (well, a little, but he's so happily married, y'know?) and Kyle Secor and Reed Diamond are cute, and they are an honest diversion from Meldrick, but Meldrick's the shit. I wish I remembered his name (I wouldn't have remembered Kellerman's but Gee posted it). Clark something. He played college football. Sigh. Never mind.
    But that Melissa Leo kicked ass! What they did to her was a crime. They wanted to have a character whose tits they could legitimately exploit. Fuck them. That Richard Belzer is one funny mudderfucker, tho. And, honestly, I really like Giancarlo Esposito. Sigh. Now I want to move back to Baltimore.


By Margret on Thursday, May 20, 1999 - 11:08 am:

    Oh --

    The Phantom Limbs:

    "Well I'm known around here as a man of convictions,
    thinking things through to the contradictions.
    Then and only then do I give up,
    and sit on the edge of the bed and stare at the floor."


By Agatha on Thursday, May 20, 1999 - 11:38 am:

    here is your 1999 value added statement. this document is a valuable tool for understanding your pay and benefits as well as for your personal planning. it clearly illustrates our approach to total pay- one of the most important elements in your relationship with (enter company name here).

    (dramatic pause)

    who gets paid to write this shit?


By Semillama on Thursday, May 20, 1999 - 12:14 pm:

    ORISE is not paying you, you are recieving a stipend for postgraduate study. You will have to pay taxes quarterly. You will have to pay for your own health insurance, which is required.

    paraphrased from the packet the program that"hired" me just sent. Bastards! If I had any other job offers...


By Shaggy on Thursday, May 20, 1999 - 10:28 pm:

    "Swollen angels point and laugh, this time your god is dead..."


By Droopy on Thursday, May 20, 1999 - 10:39 pm:

    "Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy simply to be normal."

    -Camus


By heather on Thursday, May 20, 1999 - 11:06 pm:

    i love camus sometimes


By R.C. on Friday, May 21, 1999 - 01:31 am:

    Llamakins --- check w/an accountant. I knew many a grad student back in the 80's who didn't pay a dime in taxes on their stipends. I think you have to incorporate yrself 1st -- which is just a matter of a couple of hundred $$ & some paperwork. Then you get to claim it as 'funding for research' or some such thing. And be sure to ITEMIZE & DOCUMENT all yr moving expenes. Those will definitely be deductible.

    Also -- no employer can force you to buy health ins. 'Tis not legal. But if you're on good terms w/yr Parental Units (whom I assume are still of working age)/see if they can have you added onto their coverage. Most big companies/city & state jobs/universities & school districts/allow their employee's kids to piggyback on their parent's medical coverage up until age 28/so long as they're full-time students.

    You shd also consider screwing them by jumping ship ASAP & going to a different post-grad program. If you were accepted anywhere else/make a few phone calls & see if it's not too late to take another offer.


By Gee on Friday, May 21, 1999 - 02:42 am:

    "You know you live in your own little world cuz don't nobody wanna live there with you."

    Meldrick Lewis as played by Clark Johnson, who today on Bravo! had the same darn hairstyle Bayliss stupidly convinced himself would look good on him. When will these people learn? Frank is the only one who can pull of the bald thing.

    Meldrick's my favorite too. Next to Gee. But Gee isn't a lust thing. I just dig him. He's regal, yet imposing. Clark Johnson spends half his time in Canada. Toronto, I think.


By Margret on Friday, May 21, 1999 - 02:56 am:

    I miss Daniel Baldwin and Ned Beatty.


By R.C. on Friday, May 21, 1999 - 03:35 am:

    Wait -- who's Fontana's girlfriend?

    I was very disappointed w/the 2 newbies (the arrogant Guido & the Greek-looking girl that were shagging each other -- I never cared enuf to learn their names). But when they bought in Michael Michele/I was like, Yeaaaah! A new sister/at last! I've followed her career for some time & she's done a lot of pretty showpiece roles on t.v. series. And I had written her off as just another too-skinny (she's awfully thin/for a Sistah) no-talent beauty queen. But then she got the part on "Homicide" & she was workin' it! All she needed was some good material to show what she cd do. After she took her ass-whippin' & they started pulling her hair back/so it wasn't all abt this cloud of hair accentuating this too-beautiful-for-a-cop face/she really settled in & got into the meat of the role. I liked the fact that she had a chip on her shoulder becuz of the Ex-Miss Maryland or whatever thing. I'm sure she had no trouble
    drawing on her real-life experiences for subtext. But she had really begun to grow into the role. And her portrayal of what female detectives go thru was great to see. That other cute little Sistah who transferred over from Narcotics never seemed to get any flack for being female. Which I though was odd...

    And it was a travesty that they dissed Kellerman w/that whole dirty-cop story arc before he left. And ruined Bayliss' credibility w/the "Uh, I'm Gay...no, wait...I'm Bi" arc. When he hooked up w/that crazy Asian chick w/the coffin/he was Too Hot!

    Plus/I dig the fact that they added Sarita Choudhury as an M.E. this season. She's a great actress who doesn't work enuf becuz Hollywood can't figure out what to do w/an Indian woman.

    Oh yeah -- I read somewhere that "Law & Order" was being cxld./but morphed into a new show.
    With some weird title like :"Law & Order: The Special Forces Files". Some of the cast will cross over/& some will be replaced. But IMO/the show had finally achieved the perfect casting balance w/the new ADA they added (even tho they have no Black regulars how except Lt. Van Buren. The DA's office cd use some non-white folks/esp. since it's set in NY).
    So I dunno what it's gonna lok like next season.
    If Bratt's leaving/I bet it's becuz Julia has been whispering in his ear abt making the leap to features. Which is very risky for someone who has been identified as a Latino actor (he's Peruvian & German). Jimmy Smits hasn't had a movie out since he left "NYPD Blue". But I heard he did a film w/Wim Wenders (one of my fave directors) that'll be out later this year.


By R.C. on Friday, May 21, 1999 - 08:11 pm:

    Courtesy of Droopy/from the WAYD board::


    "So long as I remain alive and well I shall continue to feel strongly about prose style, to love the suface of the earth, and to take a pleasure in solid objects and scraps of useless information."

    - George Orwell


By R.C. on Friday, May 21, 1999 - 11:33 pm:

    Damn.

    The last episode of "Homicide" SUCKED!

    No closure/no explaination of what anybody was going to be doing in their imaginary futures in Balto.

    Having Munch & Billie Blowjob get married was dumb. Munch has always sworn he'd never marry again.

    And what was up w/Bayliss? He's there packing up all his shit in a box/& NOBODY in the room notices?

    Were we s'posed to infer that he quit? Quitting requires notifying yr boss. And did he quit becuz he'd decided to shoot the Internet Killer? Or was it Shepard who popped him/which her line abt "accepting the mystery" seemed to imply. Naah
    -- she's a newbie. Not hardened enuf to go for a revenge hit.

    But it was a fresh kill/& Shepard & Bayliss were both at the precinct. So it cdn't have been them.

    But at least Giardello didn't take that dumb promotion to Property Crimes. Puleeze.

    Ah well... there's always syndication. If A&E is smart/they'll cop the syndie rights & put "Homicide" reruns on after their "Law & Order" reruns. That wd be a killer late-nite format.

    (No pun intended.)


By Sheila on Saturday, May 22, 1999 - 02:10 am:

    Bayliss. sigh. I miss Frank. I liked the last, enigmatic episode.


By Gee on Sunday, May 23, 1999 - 02:42 pm:

    Ton Fontana's girlfriend is the "Greek-looking girl", Ballard. You had to know she's sleeping with the producer to stay on that show. the cute little sistah, Stivers, is (was) the only good chick left on that show. They had Kay and they had Russert, but they ditched them both and brought on vally girl wannabes with too-pretty faces and big breasts. Someone I know commented that in one episode one of Ballard's breasts seemed to be waving at the camera.

    The big man Rocked, but I was never comfterble with Felton (Baldwin). He was just a lousey cop. I remember when he threw a cup or a can or something at Gee, and Gee got all close and narrow-eyed and menicing and just BAD. Gee is really the man.

    I liked the last episode, too. Mostly. I thought Bayliss was a lil' out of character (can't believe he shoved little Eddie Danvers), but overall it was a nice little ep. Bayliss DID quit, by the way. The only reason I know this is because even if the show hadn't been canceled, Kyle had decided to leave it, and this episode was written as a SEASON finale, not SERIES. Personally I don't think Timmy could be anything Other than a cop. And I think he's a super convincing bi character too.

    I can't belive, the first time they mention Frank in the whole season (which I've been salivating for) and it's only to discover that he hasn't been keeping in touch. What a huge freaking dissapointment. I've been waiting forEver for Timmy to walk in saying something like "I saw Frank the other day, blah blah blah". Freaking Frank.

    I loved the way they sprayed those really quick clips of the previous years, right at the end. By the way, as far as syndication goes, there's Bravo! in Canada, and Court TV in the states.

    All of this stuff I'm saying here, when I should be doing it on my Homicide list. I'm terrible.


By Margret on Sunday, May 23, 1999 - 07:31 pm:

    I liked Daniel Baldwin because he was the most believeable Bal'moron, other than Ned Beatty, Munch, and Clark Johnson. Kay, when they did that first season episode where they showed she saw from Maryland's eastern shore, was 100% on as a daughter of the Chesapeake. Frank made a great catholic, great emigre to Baltimore, awesome. But Baldwin was really Baltimore-like. When they brought in all those shiny faced pneumatic boobed new people, the homicide squad lost much of its convincing local flavour, the connection to a locale which makes the show a microcosm, the thing which frankly makes "Law & Order" still so good. Snapshots of a particular world. The writing wavered between excellent and mediocre, but the performances were always excellent. Until all those horrible people came.
    I liked Zelko Ivanek. He was like Batgirl for me, I always looked forward to the special mentions of his existence, the little glimpses.


By R.C. on Monday, May 24, 1999 - 12:30 am:

    Actors. They get a gig portraying an interesting character in a 1st-rate t.v. series/then get bored of it after a few years & want to go off & make fil-ums.

    I give t.v. actors much more repsect than most movie actors. Becuz it takes such great talent to portray the same character wk. after wk./to keep deepening & broadening that character/
    while still holding onto the essential traits that make the character believable. But actors on the few good t.v. dramas w/large ensemble casts always decide to leave 4 or 5 yrs. into the show. First one of 'stars' announces they're leaving. Then next season/someone else goes. Or the network decides to cancel the show altogether after the big names jump ship.

    Why can't these people be satisfied with getting paid ten of thousands (sometimes hundreds of thousands) of $$ per week to work on a great t.v. drama? Why can't they stay put until the network decides to axe the show/instead of
    forcing the network's hand by dropping away one by one/like a tree shedding leaves?

    And they usually end up like David Caruso & George Clooney -- making crappy features that bomb at the box office. So what career satisfaction did they gain by ditching their t.v. gig?

    It jes' ain't right...


By Margret on Monday, May 24, 1999 - 01:05 am:

    Clooney was ok in "From Dusk Til Dawn." He's just eye candy, though. Don't think he has the depth to do serious epic drama. He does a good job on ER, too bad it's not enough.

    Andre Braugher, however, is god. Everyone I have known (except for the past year) was converted to Homicide watching by Braugher's performances. Oh yeah, everyone eventually catches on to other characters. But Andre Braugher's acting mesmerizes. My housemate Eric was like "fuck DeNiro, fuck Pacino, oh my god this guy is the real deal."

    Exactly.


By R.C. on Monday, May 24, 1999 - 01:22 am:

    Nonononon, Margret -- Clooney's got chops/I yell ya! He was damn good in "Out of Sight". But that role was a lot abt sex-appeal/for both him & Lopez.) S'just that he's been ruined by working w/t.v. directors who've let him develop bad habits. (Soap directors are the WORST -- that's why soap actors usually stink so bad.) Like the way he always used to look down at the floor when he was trying to be earnest or express something difficult on E.R. But in the straight dramatic moments of dealing w/patients in crisis/Clooney was great! Ditto for the times when he had to go toe-to-toe w/Weaver or another one of his superiors over the right treatment for some little tyke.

    Yes -- Andre Braugher was THE best actor on t.v. And what's he doing now? Spending his time on the big screen sitting on the frames of skyscrapers w/another t.v. actor/pretending to be an angel in somebody's else's project.

    *sigh* They never learn...


By Margret on Monday, May 24, 1999 - 03:10 am:

    But he was a damned good angel even though that movie should never have been made.


By Gee on Monday, May 24, 1999 - 05:51 am:

    How can anyone even argue with Andre and Kyle wanting to leave the show after the way they tainted it with those freaking newcomers? I heard that even if there had been another season, they wanted them to get rid of Gee. If that had happened I would have stopped watching anyway (no Gee, no me), so I'm not all that broken up about it's cancellation.

    Personally I'd much rather act in movies. Not because it's harder or easier, but just because it must get kinda dull being the same guy all the time. Where's the fun in escapism if you only get to have one other personality?

    With TV, being the same character every day/week, yea you have more time to develop the character, and that must be really great sometimes, but after a while it must become really comfterble. Old hat. Not at all challanging anymore. That's why people get typecast. Movies must Rock! A new personality every year or so...a new character to help create...I would imagian it makes you feel pretty darn alive. Alive as someone other than yourself, sure, but still...


By Guantlet on Thursday, June 10, 1999 - 05:46 pm:

    Don't shoot the food


By Mala-dicta on Thursday, June 10, 1999 - 06:28 pm:

    Don,t let your meat loaf,don,t let your eye ball.


By Clif on Tuesday, June 15, 1999 - 10:38 am:

    No. 11076
    Date Jul 29 1932

    This is to certify that _Clifton Morgan_
    Age _20_ Sex _M_ Race _W_ Height _5' 10''_ Weight _153_
    Color Hair _Br_ Color Eyes _Br_ has been examined by this Department and, to the best of my knowledge and belief, is free from communicable disease and is hereby issued this certificate, which expires six months from date unless renewed by this Department by endorsement on the back of this card. This card may be revoked when in the opinion of the Department the holder is supected to have a communicable disease or a carrier of such and the Department reserves the right to make other such examinations, tests, etc., at any time that may be necessary. The examination and this card was made and issued without fee.


By Cyst on Tuesday, June 15, 1999 - 11:05 am:

    congratulations!


By Natw on Tuesday, June 15, 1999 - 11:36 am:

    Date Jul 29 1932


By Jim aka PajamaBoy on Tuesday, June 15, 1999 - 12:21 pm:

    Jim: "wanna catch a movie sometime?"

    Prospective Date: "Sure."

    *swoooon*

    Tomorrow night. A movie. I'm close to heaven I think.


By Clif on Tuesday, June 15, 1999 - 12:26 pm:

    Hey, they never did revoke that card.

    67 years certified communicable disease free.

    Let's see how many of you can make it to the year 2000.

    ;)


By J on Tuesday, June 15, 1999 - 12:36 pm:

    I,m all good and believe me I,ve done some stupid things, enough to have myself checked out.But I really thank God,but then again I,m not dead yet.


By Jim aka PajamaBoy on Wednesday, June 16, 1999 - 09:55 pm:

    heh.

    prospective date was a no show.

    :/


By Rhiannon on Wednesday, June 16, 1999 - 10:20 pm:

    Aw, Jim. *big hug*


By Jim aka PajamaBoy on Thursday, June 17, 1999 - 09:10 am:

    Thanks Welsh Witch. Apparently he thought it was for 9pm instead of 8pm. Yet, when he realized he must have did something wrong.. did he try to contact me 1st? No. He went to a bar and watched dancing dicks.


By Jim aka PajamaBoy on Friday, June 18, 1999 - 07:44 am:

    Prospective Date to cluster of my friends at a bar last night: "Me and Jim were supposes to 'watch' a movie last night, and I had the time wrong."

    Cluster of friends who already knew the story: "Oh, gee, that's too bad."

    Jim: *trying hard not to roll his eyes*

    Prospective Date to Jim: "You forgive me don't you?"

    Jim to Prospective Date just to get him out of my face: "Yeah sure thing."

    I went out last night in the hopes he would apologize profusely and suggest another day and time for our date. He did not. I will shed no more tears for this asswipe after seeing him in action last night. Avoided me like the plague, hit on these *young* and I mean *young* guys, and shook my hand goodnight. What was up with that? He hugged me the first time we met and every time since. Now a fucking handshake?

    I might have to resort to R.C.'s suggestion and trip his ass up at skating on Monday night.


By Rhiannon on Friday, June 18, 1999 - 09:04 am:

    So wait, O patron saint of Spain...the guy asks for your forgiveness but doesn't offer to make it up to you? Ignores you and hits on everyone else in the room? Then deigns to shake your hand, as if you should be grateful for that much contact???

    I'm with R.C. on this one. Kick his ass!


By R.C. on Friday, June 18, 1999 - 09:49 am:

    Don't ask me why I thought gay men had better manners than straight guys. Becuz they obviously do not.

    But pls. don't throw in the towel PJ. Like I said/you're long overdue. So ask someone else out.


By J on Friday, June 18, 1999 - 10:31 am:

    Jim,I heard if you put visene in someones drink it will give them the splats,I don,t know if it works for real,but next time you see the bastard,why not give it a try?See how long the chicken queen hangs around then.I feel your pain.


By Jim aka PajamaBoy on Friday, June 18, 1999 - 12:15 pm:

    Hahaha. Thanks guys!


By Wisper on Friday, June 18, 1999 - 12:54 pm:

    The visine is true. Works in about half an hour. You have to put the whole contents of the bottle in though, that's the key.
    This is what you learn from revenge driven paramedics.

    Have fun Jim *hugs*


By Wisper on Friday, June 18, 1999 - 01:10 pm:

    Oh, my fav sentences:

    "I wish I knew what I really wanted, so I could complain about not having it"


    "me fail english? that's un-possible!"


    "the wee turtles!! somebody save me from the wee turtles!!"


    "If life deals you lemons, why not go kill someone with the lemons?" ~Jack Handey


    "there there, shut up boy! Crying isn't going to make your dog come back....unless your tears smell like dog-food. So you can just sit there, crying, eating can after can of dog-food until your tears smell enough like dog-food that your dog comes back, or you can go out there and find your dog!!!"




By J on Friday, June 18, 1999 - 02:30 pm:

    LOL,the dog not coming back,I laughed till I cried,and my tears didn,t smell like dog food.That was just too good.


By J on Friday, June 18, 1999 - 02:31 pm:

    LOL,the dog not coming back,I laughed till I
    cried,and my tears didn,t smell like dog food.That
    was just too good.


By Dr. oopy on Friday, June 18, 1999 - 02:47 pm:

    "What's that smell that hangs over the whole village?" asked Gordon. "I noticed it as soon as I arrived. It's a nauseatingly sweet, cloying smell, rather like mice."

    "I know what you mean. That's hemp - they grow a lot of it here. The plant itself has that nagging, clinging, carrion smell. And then in the battle zone, the dead often remain undiscovered in the hemp fields for a long time and begin to decay."

    - _Dr. Zhivago_



    Mice?


By Jim aka PajamaBoy on Friday, June 18, 1999 - 11:19 pm:

    I really am not the vindictive type. I think what would be fun, is handing him a tube of preparationH and saying, "you forgot this at my place, honey."


By J on Saturday, June 19, 1999 - 12:00 pm:

    Or being at the bar,and yelling very loudly across the room,Hey! Whatever his name is,do your asshole impersenation!!!


By Mala-dicta on Saturday, June 19, 1999 - 12:53 pm:

    Or Hey!Rubberneck!


By Gee on Sunday, June 20, 1999 - 03:53 am:

    "Lots of people think a song without singing is not a song. Tell that to Beethoven and he'll kick your ass."

    - Eddie Van Halen -



    (teehee. I saw that on someone's signature today.)


By Gee on Monday, June 21, 1999 - 06:00 pm:

    "The bluebird of happiness long absent from his life, Ned is visited by the chicken of depression."


    - Gary Larson -


By Jim aka PajamaBoy on Tuesday, June 22, 1999 - 01:14 pm:

    Damn I miss the Far Side, and Calvin & Hobbes too.


By Lucy on Tuesday, June 22, 1999 - 11:00 pm:

    "I'm lying on my back/ the stars look all too near/ flowers on the razor wire/ I know you're here"

    I'm lusting for an outdoorsy polyglot type (a man who can woo me in four languages has won me already).
    I want to take him to the desert and fuck him until we run out of food and water.
    He has blue eyes (never trust a man with blue eyes...never trust a man..never trust a woman..oh, fuck everyone) and I can just see his face framed by the stars (stars like you really only see in the desert)
    That line has been running through my head all day.


By Jim aka PajamaBoy on Wednesday, June 23, 1999 - 08:11 am:

    "They say that you will always be the last to know. They say that all that glitters is not gold. It's not just that you're never coming back to me. It's the bitter way that I was told. And I'm up while the dawn is breaking, even though my heart aching, I should be drinking a toast to absent friends, instead of these comedians."

    -- Elvis Costello


By Rhiannon on Wednesday, June 23, 1999 - 09:28 am:

    "You killed my love, you just stabbed it and watched it die, you've committed romanticide in the highest degree"
    --Glyn Styler

    "On 'Suck City' these radicals whip through some tasty melodrama"
    --Pal Noman, about C$C

    "Well, you know, I have no soul"
    --Michael Gira

    "When God was running after you to save you, you were always running away from Him to lose yourself"
    --St. Francis de Sales (not exact)


By Nate on Wednesday, June 23, 1999 - 11:06 am:

    "For those who believe in God, most of the big questions are answered. But for those of us who can't readily accept the God formula, the big answers don't remain stone-written. We adjust to new conditions and discoveries. We are pliable. Love need not be a command or fairth a dictum. I am my own God. We are here to unlearn the teachings of the church, state and our educational system. We are here to drink beer. We are here to kill war. We are here to laugh at the odds and live our lives so well that Death will tremble to take us."

    -Charles Bukowski

    i love that last part.


By Lucy on Wednesday, June 23, 1999 - 03:04 pm:

    "There are no gods where I am"
    Alesteir Crowley

    "Given the number of religions in the world,
    Given the high percentage of them that believe that all others are damned to hell/samsara/etc.
    And assuming(relativist that I am) that all of them have an equal chance of being right.

    "My chances of escaping eternal damnation are pretty slim.

    "Therefore, my best option is to live my life in such a way that, in that split second between realization and the lake of fire, I will be able to say, either to myself, or to whatever deities are listening "Yeah, but it was worth it"

    I said that somewhere.

    And that's why I'm still thinking of the desert.


By Waffleboy on Wednesday, June 23, 1999 - 03:13 pm:

    "i want to go to hell, thats where all the cool people are!!"


    -waffleboy


By J on Wednesday, June 23, 1999 - 03:27 pm:

    I have a job in Hell,I work for Satan,he pays me such a sorry sum for working the penis slicer.


By Dave on Wednesday, June 23, 1999 - 11:26 pm:

    I love me.
    I love you.
    And if we get a dog,
    I'll love it, too.

    If you leave,
    I will grieve.
    but in the end,
    there's always me.
    (and, hopefully, the dog)

    My Name
    "Wet Hills and Big Wheels"
    Tacoma, WA

    I'm an aquarium.
    Fish are my thoughts and motives.

    Same







By Gee on Thursday, June 24, 1999 - 02:12 am:

    "Are you unhinged?"

    -Callum Keith Rennie-


By Jim aka PajamaBoy on Thursday, June 24, 1999 - 08:04 am:

    "I think there should be a law that they put muzzles on snakes."

    -- A Washington D.C. Nutjob.


By Tesserae on Thursday, June 24, 1999 - 09:16 am:

    Nate: you remember what book that Bukowski quote's from?

    Cause I sure don't, and it's buggin me.


By Nate on Thursday, June 24, 1999 - 10:57 am:

    i do not know. it was sent to me.

    i'm working my way through Buk's catalog, though, so when i find it i'll let you know.


By J on Friday, June 25, 1999 - 11:53 am:

    At first I thought he was walking the dog,then I saw it was his date.John Waters


By sarah on Thursday, January 27, 2000 - 07:54 pm:


    "I'm ready for rebound sex, free dinners, and no
    commitment."




By AKA on Friday, January 28, 2000 - 02:09 am:

    I wish that people who are conventionally supposed to love each other would say to each other, when they fight, "Please--a little less love, and a little more common decency."

    Kurt Vonnegut


By cyst on Friday, January 28, 2000 - 10:25 am:

    when love fails, courtesy prevails - kv


By Margret on Friday, January 28, 2000 - 10:40 am:

    That's actually one of my personal mottos.


By Dougie on Friday, January 28, 2000 - 11:58 am:

    Honi soit qui mal y pense
    is always a good one. Plus, it rolls off the tongue so beautifully.


By semillama on Friday, January 28, 2000 - 05:45 pm:

    That's found a lot as a part of maker's marks on historic ceramics.

    lately, I have been typing these words quite a bit:

    Site-area-corresponds-acquisition-associated-plat-Army Farm Survey records-1912 History of Monroe County (Richards)-military-foundation-cellar-artifact scatter-subsurface-amethyst-diagnostic-date range-ca.-indicate-feature

    and so on. When I start writing my intro, background and history sections to my report, it will feel weird.


By Jina on Friday, January 28, 2000 - 06:05 pm:

    I am an aetheist
    Aetheists don't believe in god
    God doesn't believe in a god
    Therefore God is an aetheist


By Nate on Friday, January 28, 2000 - 06:26 pm:

    uh

    crap.

    i think i just blew a lobe.


By Im not anal but... on Saturday, January 29, 2000 - 01:50 am:

    Atheist.


By ____ on Saturday, January 29, 2000 - 02:31 am:

    i am but anal. i want to be analyzed. i'll pay.


By R.C. on Saturday, January 29, 2000 - 02:55 am:

    Come here ___. I'll analyze you for free. Let me get out my mascara brush...


By AKA on Wednesday, February 2, 2000 - 05:28 pm:

    "Hell is other people," said Jean-Paul Sartre.
    "Hell is other real people," is what he should have said.

    Kurt Vonnegut


By semillama on Wednesday, February 2, 2000 - 09:07 pm:

    "Oh, Good heavens! What degenerate produced this abortion?"

    Ignatius J. Reilly


By Gee on Thursday, February 3, 2000 - 03:11 am:

    "I was a down and out canuck."


    MF


By J on Thursday, February 3, 2000 - 10:41 am:

    My ass would make you a Sunday face..J.D.Carter


By semillama on Friday, February 4, 2000 - 12:54 am:

    "I was a teenage satanist, or so my dad thought. In his eyes, I was Damien. My long hair concealed the mark of the Beast, and according to my dear old Pa, it was heavy metal that conveyed the evil messages of Satan -and I loved it. I was 15, long disgusting hair, torn Levis, and I had a love for the finer things in life: pot, cheap beer, girls, and fuckin' metal! My favorites were Slayer, Venom, and Celtic Frost. I can't forget the High Priest of Satanic Metal: King Diamond and Mercyful Fate. Those bands pretty much set the standards for my sacrificial soundtracks."

    By ray, In "Genetic Disorder #14"


By sarah on Friday, February 4, 2000 - 04:18 pm:


    "I'd suck the chunky monkey." -- Czarina




By Markus on Friday, February 4, 2000 - 04:38 pm:

    Beat me to it.


By heather on Monday, February 7, 2000 - 02:57 pm:

    "I,ve been in several cults and they all sucked" -- j

    j, girl, what haven't you done?


By J on Monday, February 7, 2000 - 04:01 pm:

    Heather honey you don,t even want to know...I,m winking at you:)


By Jina on Tuesday, February 8, 2000 - 01:43 am:

    I want to sing, want to dance, want you inside my pants for love!


By heather on Monday, February 14, 2000 - 05:21 pm:


    This is sorabji.com:
    Shuffled memories, no better than the jumble of our nighttime dreams, can evolve subconsciously into something of quality, such as a sentence to speak aloud.


By J on Tuesday, February 15, 2000 - 09:21 am:

    I,ll buy that for a dollar.


By Kymical on Tuesday, February 15, 2000 - 01:17 pm:

    champagne for my real friends,
    real pain for my sham friends.
    -francais bacon

    i like ideas. the only thing i like more are bright ones.
    -pablo st. chaos

    bubble gum stuck to your shoe, cause i have struck again.
    -barefoot bubblegum princess (aka Kymical)

    no matter what, things can never stay the way they are. good or bad.
    -shawn sweggman


By heather on Tuesday, February 15, 2000 - 02:06 pm:

    that up there was on the front page


By Rhiannon on Tuesday, February 15, 2000 - 02:22 pm:

    Hey, I thought Tom Waits said the champaigne thing! Who is this Francis Bacon imposter?


By Kymical on Wednesday, February 16, 2000 - 02:32 am:

    imposter...?

    i think he was (surprisingly enough) around before mr. waits.

    francais bacon was a painter. his word is captivating and riveting....at least to me. most of his work is just amazing again in my opinion.

    i believe he was born like in the 20 or something, probably before then cause he was quite old in the 60's. to some he seemed a vicious man and to others a docile friend.

    oh yeah, he had a lot to express on homosexual issues, but wether or not he himself was, i am still uncertain....it is kind of cloudy.
    i read a whole book about him while i was in a book store. it showed a large collection of his paintings, and i read the whole thing from begining to end.


By JusMiceElf on Wednesday, February 16, 2000 - 10:43 am:

    Anne Boelyn's head
    collects its Severance Pay
    she says 'Henry's got the clap that's
    why he's treating me this way'"
    -Paul Hansbury


By Kymical on Wednesday, February 16, 2000 - 05:58 pm:

    i think that my hair is trying to kill me.
    i woke up this morning and i was choking on it. it was almost all the way down my throat!
    the chaos is getting strong and defiant.
    -pablo st chaos


By Charles Olson on Wednesday, February 16, 2000 - 06:19 pm:

    You climbed up the tree after some foul berry
    and fell down and died
    You ate berries, fell from the rock
    and died
    You ate sorb berries
    and died
    You ate raspberries,
    drowned in the swamp and died


By e e on Wednesday, February 16, 2000 - 06:40 pm:

    Humanity i love you
    because you would rather black the boots of
    success than enquire whose soul dangles from his
    watch-chain which would be embarrassing for both

    parties and because you
    unflinchingly applaud all
    songs containing the words country home and
    mother when sung at the old howard

    Humanity i love you because
    when you're hard up you pawn your
    intelligence to buy a drink and when
    you're flush pride keeps

    you from the pawn shops and
    because you are continually committing
    nuisances but more
    especially in your own house

    Humanity i love you because you
    are perpetually putting the secret of
    life in your pants and forgetting
    it's there and sitting down

    on it
    and because you are
    forever making poems in the lap
    of death Humanity

    i hate you


By Spider on Wednesday, May 14, 2003 - 05:09 pm:

    "hell, i'd eat your baby even if it wasn't a pepperidge farm product."

    -- blindswine


By jack on Wednesday, May 14, 2003 - 05:44 pm:

    "funny how many people who go looking for arguments complain when people argue with them"


By Rowlf on Wednesday, May 14, 2003 - 05:54 pm:

    Manila is for majilas


By TBone on Wednesday, May 14, 2003 - 06:58 pm:

    "Do not bite or chew. Swallow whole."


By wisper on Wednesday, May 14, 2003 - 07:46 pm:

    "who else is going to drag you out to homosexual parades? No one else, just ME. Because i'm you're goddamn bounty hunter..!"


    ~me


By sarah on Thursday, May 15, 2003 - 11:23 am:


    "asshole stigmata.
    thank you, that's all i needed. I'm going to bed now."

    - wisper



By Dougie on Thursday, May 15, 2003 - 11:28 am:

    "If you think it's butter, but it's snot, it's Chiffon."


By Ophelia on Thursday, May 15, 2003 - 04:49 pm:

    "Each time I dug the
    can opener in, it only slid muddily into the side of the
    container; and the side device of the can opener itself, I guess
    we can call it the "container-grip," was utterly incapable of
    gripping the blasted container or doing anything else to it
    except slowly chewing up the sides of the lid and spew the
    twisted carnage of metal shavings directly into the ever more
    tantalizing Kool-Aid matter that peeked so mercurially from
    behind the steadfastly connected lid"

    -Sir Mark


By wisper on Thursday, May 15, 2003 - 11:59 pm:

    sarah! email me!

    (and check out my lame new email address!)


By jack on Wednesday, June 11, 2003 - 02:56 pm:

    "are you really this lame or is this some kind of bad performance art?"


By Spider on Wednesday, June 11, 2003 - 05:10 pm:

    Dougie, when I was a kid, a neighbor's dad liked to say, "You think it's butter, but it's snot" and laugh hysterically.

    He'd also say, "That's about as funny as a bag full of baby arms."

    He was a fun guy.


By patrick on Wednesday, June 11, 2003 - 05:44 pm:

    "don't put baby in a corner"



By Spider on Wednesday, June 18, 2003 - 02:21 pm:

    "everybody gets served.

    i like to serve it up hot.

    it's all porkchops and razorblades. one minute-- high on the hog. the next-- shanked in the night."

    --blindswine


By Spider on Monday, June 23, 2003 - 03:34 pm:

    "Any guy (Peter Steel) who has fangs, lets people drink his blood, sings like lurch, been quoted in interviews as saying "I'd kill myself but I'm waiting for the punchline" and used to drive a garbage truck has got be goth."

    --Skooter


By Spider on Wednesday, March 31, 2004 - 06:40 pm:

    "I guess the idea of straight men dressing up as lesbians to pick up women could be considered arrogant if it weren't for the fact that we were very sincere about all of this."

    --Darren Finizio


By jack on Wednesday, March 31, 2004 - 11:52 pm:

    "It smells like Bob Marley's ass in here."

    --cop entering car in a scene from "Busted: The Citizen's Guide to Surviving Police Encounters" (according to Liz Spikol, who endorses the video)



    ----------also, as long as i'm here: i didn't attribute my june 11, 2003 post above. it's blindswine, sorabji.com, of course. and i just quoted myself informally for my may 14, 2003 post above.


By Girl shool screamers on Thursday, April 1, 2004 - 06:48 pm:

    "It smells like Bob Marley's ass in here", What a bumper sticker!!!!


By Spider on Monday, December 27, 2004 - 12:09 am:

    "Tomorrow morning, regardless of who wins, we'll have the opportunity to come together as a nation. This is an opportunity we must reject.

    "Look at the facts: After decades of apathy, this election marks the highest voter turnout since 1968, when we were also divided. Our only mistake back then was quelling those street riots. So to those who call for civilized discourse I say: 'Shut your ugly cakehole, fatty!'

    "It's too late to turn back. Ours is now an anger-based economy. I look forward to a glorious tomorrow, when hybrid vehicles run half on gasoline, half on seething hate. Remember, a house divided against itself is what we here in New York call...a duplex."


    -- Stephen Colbert


By Spider on Sunday, November 16, 2008 - 04:57 pm:

    Stephen Colbert, visionary.




    "I recently read There is a Monster at the End of This Book by Grover. I picked it up on a lark, figuring it would by a typical horror/thriller throwaway. It followed a pretty obvious course through the old cliches of the genre most of the way through, but the ending threw me for a shock that had me catatonic in existential malaise for weeks afterwards. NOTE: DO NOT READ FURTHER IF YOU DO NOT WANT IT TO BE SPOILED!!! When I found out that the monster in the book was indeed Grover I thought, "My god... it could be any of us." Yes that's right, the narrator of the book, the kindly and gentle guide through this thrill-ride, was indeed the monster of which he spoke. This raised many, many questions. It seems from reflection that Grover himself was unaware that he was the monster. However, in the modern and postmodern likelihood of unreliable narration, it seems that it could just of easily been a clever deception by the monster, to lure the reader into his confidence before springing his trap. But the question remains. Does a monster know he is a monster? Or does his twisted logic somehow rationalize his monstrosity and allow it run rampant? Also, if this physically harmless appearance could harbor the monster of the book, doesn't that mean that anyone could be a monster? That "evil has no face" as they say? Ultimately, it brought me to reflect that one may be a monster and not even be full conscious of the fact. That one may be revealed to be monstrous, but only at the end of a mysterious and terrible life of lies."

    --another visionary on the Something Awful boards.


By droopy on Sunday, November 16, 2008 - 06:48 pm:

    wasn't that the great revelation of pogo comics? "we have met the enemy and he is us." stephen colbert owes walt kelley royalties.


By Spider on Friday, November 21, 2008 - 09:43 pm:

    "I still haven't finished nineteen eighty four because I accidently set my copy on fire, whilst reading it. True story. I'm sure there's some symbolism in there somewhere."


By Dr Pepper on Saturday, November 22, 2008 - 01:16 am:

    1984, don't you say? Spider, I will want to hear your story about 1984, however, I wasn't interesting on a movie.


By Dr Pepper on Saturday, November 22, 2008 - 01:19 am:

    If the guns are outlawed, only outlaws will have guns. I hoped that sentences makes sense to us.


By Baffled on Sunday, November 23, 2008 - 06:35 pm:

    "Spider, I will want to hear your story about 1984, however, I wasn't interesting on a movie."



By Dr Pepper on Sunday, November 23, 2008 - 07:09 pm:

    Hi Baffled from North Carolina.


By jaq on Sunday, November 23, 2008 - 07:26 pm:

    baffled, let me explain. he's trying to say that i hoped that sentences makes sense to us. capisci?


By Dr Pepperelli on Sunday, November 23, 2008 - 08:08 pm:

    Hey jack, how are things in N.Y.C?


By jaq on Sunday, November 23, 2008 - 08:20 pm:

    they're about how they always are in NYC.

    how are things in the 20th century?


By Dr Pepper on Sunday, November 23, 2008 - 08:24 pm:

    20th century? you kidding, they are long gone.


By 20th Century on Monday, November 24, 2008 - 10:40 am:

    no. im still here.


By CHUPACABRA on Tuesday, November 25, 2008 - 12:46 am:

    Get off my chalupa!


By Spider on Saturday, February 28, 2009 - 09:04 pm:

    "Graham Greene is the best English writer of the 20th century. Deal with it haters."


By Dr Pepper on Sunday, March 1, 2009 - 12:02 am:

    What does HE looks like? the Native Indian guy?


By Spider on Sunday, March 1, 2009 - 01:20 am:

    No, that's a different guy (the native Canadian actor) with the same name. This Graham Greene was an Englishman -- here's his wiki page.


By Dr Pepper on Sunday, March 1, 2009 - 03:12 pm:

    Spider, you ought to mention his name as Henry Graham Greene, you confused me him for Graham Greene. He is one cool actor .


By Spider on Sunday, March 1, 2009 - 04:00 pm:

    Sorry, dude, no. I posted sentences from somewhere or other that struck me as somehow well worth posting to this topic because they made me laugh. They're not my sentences. And I don't think editing them to read "[Henry] Graham Greene" would have made you any less confused. I don't think it could be that easy.


By moonit on Sunday, March 1, 2009 - 10:36 pm:

    muhahahahahahahahaha.


By droopy on Monday, March 2, 2009 - 12:22 pm:

    i knew who graham greene the writer was, but not the actor of the same name. the sentence "graham greene is the greatest native american actor..." would've confused me.

    "native indian" sounds like a native of india, dr. pepper.

    a couple of days ago i visited a hindu temple down in driftwood texas. i love that vishnu is in driftwood - where next? the streets of laredo? tombstone, arizona? it's a really pretty temple with a small community around it, a peach orchard, and all sorts of other neat shit.

    now it's official (in my mind, not that i hadn't noticed this before): we have both kinds of indians in texas, the native americans and people from india.

    i think this will cause semantic confusion. i think we need to go ahead and just drop the word "indian" altogether. i notice that people from india often use "bharati" (from the hindi word for the country) for themselves as a group. there's a "radio bharati" for example. i think if we can handle calling people from the netherlands dutch then we can manage bharati.

    we should call native americans just "americans" and come up with another term for those who came here as invaders, refugees, or slaves.




By Danielssss on Monday, March 2, 2009 - 03:22 pm:

    THE FOLLOWING SENTENCE IS FALSE. THE PREVIOUS SENTENCE IS TRUE. --EPIMENDES


By Dr Pepper on Tuesday, March 3, 2009 - 03:18 am:

    Spider, droopy,moonit and Danielssss, In case, I have seen the movie called "Thunderheart", starring Graham Greene, Val Kilmer and Sam Shepard, In case if there are any confusion. You ought to check the DVD and see if he (Graham) can extend his third finger to ya.

    droopy, the first paragraph, what is the point? I just said " He is one cool actor", and nothing else.


By jaq on Tuesday, March 3, 2009 - 10:32 pm:



    false. you "said" something else, dr. not nothing else.

    you "said" "Spider, you ought to mention his name as Henry Graham Greene, you confused me him for Graham Greene. He is one cool actor . "


    in case, "native indian" mean native of india.

    but not native indianan. you confused him me.

    deal with it haterz.

    deal with it spiderz.

    what is the point?






By Dr Pepper on Wednesday, March 4, 2009 - 03:26 am:

    Haterz? I am not a hater.


By Dr Pepper on Wednesday, March 4, 2009 - 03:28 am:

    Oh excuse me, I meant.... Native American. I have been busy quite lately.. Thank you. It is a P.T.S.D.


By heather on Wednesday, March 4, 2009 - 09:35 pm:

    being busy is a disorder? that explains so much.

    i'm going to go stand at the top of the stairs.


By jaq on Wednesday, March 4, 2009 - 09:46 pm:



    then what?



By Dr Pepper on Thursday, March 5, 2009 - 04:04 am:

    Then what? check out the DVD called "Thunderheart" starred Val Kilmer, Graham Greene,(not Henry Grahman Greene) and Sam Sheperd. Ok?


By sarah on Thursday, March 5, 2009 - 11:58 am:


    i'll stand at the bottom of the stairs.




By heather on Thursday, March 5, 2009 - 12:45 pm:


By Dr Pepper on Thursday, March 5, 2009 - 12:52 pm:

    Good Choice Sarah!


By Danielssss on Thursday, March 5, 2009 - 11:19 pm:

    i WILL avoid stairs at all costs, unless made of chili, in which case I will eat the stairs. No beans please.

    So there are six of us, five men and one woman, at the Indian (dot) spicey food palace tonight in Oklahoma City OK where reasonable people would seek out Texan or Omaha beef...and we cannot decide if the veggies are too spicy for Arnie's ulcer, if the basamati rice will upset Jerry's three days of diarretic flu, and if the rest of us can interpret enough on the menu to find palatable food for these two wusses. Meanwhile, the woman among us tells the waitress that the vegetable dumplings the last time she had them were totally inedible. And there there was no dessert. Wecould not order beverages, for we were not asked, and yet the water was highly wet and tasted swell. All is not lost. No stairs in the place at all. We were the only table without dots: amobster from Jersey, a Lutheran minister turned suicide preventionist from Dallas, a hockey dad from omaha, a soccer dad who holds sweat lodges and his wife who has a PhD in something related to consciousness and health, both practicing buddhists, and myself, also of the same Eastern persuasion but the only Irish healer recognized by a tribe among them.

    That was the terrible secret of Oklahoma tonight.


By Spider on Monday, April 21, 2014 - 04:37 pm:

    From Dickens's "Our Mutual Friend":

    "Eugene is also in attendance, with a pervading air upon him of having presupposed the ceremony to be a funeral, and of being disappointed."


    Sounds like a precursor to Wodehouse.


By droopy on Friday, April 25, 2014 - 01:11 am:

    i read a saki story the other day day the had some
    pre-wodehousian sentences.

    yesterday i was stranded at the intermodal
    transport center reading from a book of hanif
    kureishi short stories. somewhere, i feel sure,
    one of the characters in one of the stories had
    said something like: these days i read and can't
    remember it the next day.

    going over the stories, i can't find it. but i
    want to. i distinctly remember reading that
    sentence, and feeling feeling so good that
    somebody else did that, too.


By Spider on Friday, April 25, 2014 - 03:06 pm:

    My memory for what I read has always been pretty terrible. Even books I love and have read and re-read many times....when I think about their plots, it all runs together in a blur.


    I wish someone had told me before that Dickens was legit laugh-out-loud funny. It's not all legless orphans starving to death in waste-filled gutters.



    But these are from Moby Dick, and they have convinced me to read the novel this summer:

    "bleeds with keenest anguish at the undraped spectacle of a valor-ruined man."

    "Talk not to me of blasphemy, man; I'd strike the sun if it insulted me."

    "In the midst of the personified impersonal, a personality stands here."

    "Old age is always wakeful; as if, the longer linked with life, the less man has to do with aught that looks like death."

    "From beneath his slouched hat Ahab dropped a tear into the sea; nor did all the Pacific contain such wealth as that one wee drop."

    "for there is no folly of the beast of the earth which is not infinitely outdone by the madness of men"

    "All are born with halters round their necks"

    "there is a higher horror in this whiteness of her woe"

    "Our souls are like those orphans whose unwedded mothers die in bearing them"

    (SERIOUSLY NOW)

    I wish someone had told me before that Moby Dick was full of poetry.




By droopy on Saturday, April 26, 2014 - 12:53 am:

    my memory of reading melville is that the poetry can
    be sort of a treasure hunt in a mass turgid prose.
    but i remember that it was worth the effort at the
    end. i wasn't very bright back then, and i'm utterly
    stupid now. but maybe i should re-read some mel just
    for the hell of it.


By Czarina on Saturday, April 26, 2014 - 12:24 pm:

    "Something fell out of my ear and rolled
    across the floor. I put it in one of those
    small plastic bubbles, like gumballs come
    in. I put it on my tv.".


    Somebody here once posted that. I have
    always be intrigued by that. And sadly,
    have never been able to forget it.


By blindswine on Saturday, May 17, 2014 - 03:35 am:

    i bitch and moan about certain aspects of portland,
    but i've met some fascinating people here. this is a
    video of a farewell show for
    one of them.


By jajaja on Saturday, May 17, 2014 - 03:41 am:


By Spider on Friday, May 30, 2014 - 10:03 am:

    "You can hold yourself back from the sufferings of the world, that is something you are free to do and it accords with your nature, but perhaps this very holding back is the one suffering you could avoid." - Kafka


By Spider on Friday, June 27, 2014 - 04:24 pm:

    All from Eliot's Middlemarch:

    Plainness has its peculiar temptations and vices quite as much as beauty; it is apt either to feign amiability, or not feigning it, to show all the repulsiveness of discontent.--p.112

    [T]o me it is one of the most odious things in a girl's life that there must always be some supposition of falling in love coming between her and any man who is kind to her, and to whom she is grateful. I should have thought that I, at least, might have been safe from all that. I have no ground for the nonsensical vanity of fancying everybody who comes near me is in love with me. --p.135

    If we had a keen vision and feeling of all ordinary human life, it would be like hearing the grass grow and the squirrel's heart beat, and we should die of that roar which lies on the other side of silence. As it is, the quickest of us walk about well wadded with stupidity. --p.191

    ...or if she could have fed her affection with those childlike caresses which are the best of every sweet woman who has begun by showering kisses on the hard pate of her bald doll, creating a happy soul within that woodenness from the wealth of her own love. --p.195

    She was humiliated to find herself a mere victim of feeling, as if she could know nothing except through that medium: all her strength was scattered in fits of agitation, of struggle, of despondency, and then again in visions of more complete renunciation, transforming all hard conditions into duty. --p.195

    She had not yet listened patiently to his heartbeats, but only felt that her own was beating violently. In Mr. Casaubon's ear, Dorothea's voice gave loud, emphatic iteration to those muffled suggestions of consciousness which it was possible to explain as mere fancy, the illusion of exaggerated sensitiveness; always when such suggestions are unmistakenly repeated from without they are resisted as cruel and unjust. We are angered even by the full acceptance of our humiliating confessions -- how much more by hearing in hard, distinct syllables from the lips of a near observer those confused murmurs which we try to call morbid and strive against as if they were the oncoming of our numbness! --p. 197

    Mortals are easily tempted to pinch the life out of their neighbor's buzzing glory and think that such killing is no murder. --p. 204

    The best piety is to enjoy -- when you can. You are doing the most then to save the earth's character as an agreeable planet. And enjoyment radiates. It is of no use to try and take care of all the world; that is being taken care of when you feel delight -- in art or in anything else. Would you turn all the youth of the world into a tragic chorus, wailing and moralizing over misery? I suspect that you have some false belief in the virtues of misery and want to make your life a martyrdom. --p. 216

    ...Dorothea's heart, which had always been giving out ardour and had never been fed with much from the living beings around her... --p. 217

    'But Lowick is my chosen home!'
    The last sentence was spoken with an almost solemn cadence, and Will did not know what to say, since it would not be useful for him to embrace her slippers and tell her that he would die for her. --p. 217

    'The poet must know how to hate,' says Goethe. --p.221

    To know intense joy without a strong bodily frame, one must have an enthusiastic soul. --p. 273

    His experience was of that pitiable kind which shrinks from pity and fears most of all that it should be known. --p. 273

    Mary was fond of her own thoughts and could amuse herself well sitting in the twilight with her hands in her lap; for having early had strong reason to believe that things were not likely to be arranged for her particular satisfaction, she wasted no time in astonishment and annoyance at that fact. And she had already come to take life very much as a comedy in which she had a proud, nay, a generous resolution not to act the mean or treacherous part. --p.307

    Mary was accustomed to think rather vigorously of what was probable and if a belief flattered her vanity she felt warned to dismiss it as ridiculous, having early had much exercise in such dismissals. --p.559

    When tender affection has been storing itself in us through many of our years, the idea that we could accept any exchange for it seems to be a cheapening of our lives. --p. 561

    I suppose on gets a habit of doing without happiness or hope. --p. 614

    'A delightful young person in Miss Garth,' said Mrs Farebrother, who had been watching her son's movements.
    'Yes,' said Mrs Vincy, obliged to reply as the old lady turned to her expectantly. 'It is a pity she is not better looking.'
    'I cannot say that,' said Mrs Farebrother decisively. 'I like her countenance. We must not always ask for beauty when a good God as seen fit to make an excellent young woman without it.'--p.624


By droopy on Tuesday, July 1, 2014 - 11:55 pm:

    interesting quotes. especially p. 614.

    i have written, deleted, re-written, and re-deleted
    (in utter disgust)a longer post than this.


By blindswine on Monday, July 7, 2014 - 01:42 pm:

    "i can't tell you much, but i can tell you this-- there are few things
    more pathetic than a full grown man squirming under the weight of
    unrequited emotion. giddy up and move on before i start looking at
    you sideways"

    --the cruelest of cathies


By Spider on Monday, July 21, 2014 - 04:29 pm:

    Cathy seems right on.


    The quote from p. 614 has a typo in it, of course -- it should read "I suppose one gets a habit..."

    Eliot is fantastic; I'd call her a peer of Dostoevsky's, in her ability to profoundly understand and, in turn, communicate the truths of human nature.


By droopy on Tuesday, July 22, 2014 - 02:07 am:

    something about the 19th century. it was a time when
    that kind of introspection was becoming part of the
    literature, but before "psychology".

    this is why i would read books like that 30 fucking
    years ago and it was a revelation.

    now....


By blindswine on Thursday, July 24, 2014 - 03:53 pm:

    funny. she's been calling me "the underground man" lately. i might have to start reading George Eliot to find some suitable retort-- "nurse ratched" gets nothing but shrieking laughter.


By blindswine on Wednesday, July 30, 2014 - 08:18 pm:

    "you don't need a girlfriend! you need a therapist!"

    cruel cathy. always on point.


By Pepper on Thursday, July 31, 2014 - 02:48 am:


By droopy on Wednesday, August 6, 2014 - 01:21 am:

    "The end of happiness is pain, and in like manner
    misery ends in unexpected happiness."

    -Giovanni Boccaccio


By droopy on Tuesday, August 12, 2014 - 03:38 am:

    have your ever been to an american wedding?
    where's the vodka, the marinated herring?!


By Pepper on Tuesday, August 12, 2014 - 04:26 am:

    Didn't you hear Robin Williams passed away? That funny comedian guy who I adore him the most. I would never understood why?


By Pepper on Tuesday, August 12, 2014 - 04:26 am:

    Didn't you hear Robin Williams passed away? That funny comedian guy who I adore him the most. I would never understood why?


By The Watcher on Tuesday, August 12, 2014 - 05:01 am:

    The Depression got him.

    I do not think many in the public eye have the benefit of peer support groups.

    The one I currently lead has helped me a lot.


By Pepper on Tuesday, August 12, 2014 - 02:43 pm:

    I thought he has alot of friends, I am sure that he will go to one of his friend when he gets depressed.

    I don't want to jump into the wrong ideas or conclusion. I know, I have been there many time and nearly had no friends.

    I have always loved his talent, he always a happy guy, looking at him smiles the whole time. So sad.


By droopy on Tuesday, August 12, 2014 - 08:24 pm:

    requiescat in pace


By The Watcher on Wednesday, August 13, 2014 - 02:51 am:

    Sometimes you do not want to burden your friends. Most of the time they do not understand. You can not just pull yourself up by the boot straps.

    I know he was no coward taking the easy way out. I think he just wanted to end the pain.


By Spider on Thursday, August 28, 2014 - 11:32 am:

    "have your ever been to an american wedding?
    where's the vodka, the marinated herring?!"

    That there is a Gogol Bordello lyric, is it not?

    It makes me smile to think of you enjoying that crazy man's music.


    I've been listening to The Clash a lot lately, thinking about Joe Strummer and what he would make of the world today.

    There's this documentary out on him called "Let's Rock Again!" - it was a tour diary of a sorts when he was with the Mescaleros on the last tour he made before his death in 2002. Got it from Netflix.

    There is a scene in which he is on the streets of Atlantic City, handing out flyers to his show that night and getting rejected by everyone. I'm watching this with my eyes bulging, thinking, JOE STRUMMER is on the street begging for an audience, my mind is reeling. And he was in great spirits the whole time, not one trace of "DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM?" in his mien.

    He later goes to a radio station and begs them over the front door intercom to play his new album. You only hear his side of the conversation, and you hear him repeating his name twice and then saying, "I used to play with the Clash. We play rock music." And my mind is off reeling again, holy shit, but he's completely cool about it. The radio DJ lets him in and has that forced-nonchalant-you're-a-celebrity-but-I-don't-care demeanor about him, and Joe's completely chill and self-deprecating and funny throughout the encounter.

    The rest of the documentary is full of him speaking to his friend the filmmaker, his bandmates, random teenagers, and interviewers, and he was wise and patient and humble and cheerful, and lovely. His lasting impression is of a man who had reached nirvana before his death, at peace with himself and his role in the world.

    Pretty good for a still-young punk.

    Thankfully, he died peacefully.


By droopy on Friday, August 29, 2014 - 06:01 am:

    it makes me smile that there's still an aspect about
    me that makes spider smile.

    i first heard gogol bordello on a local college
    radio show called "radio sputnik".

    i am of a generation that discovered the clash in
    high school and "combat rock" was on the radio. i
    worked at the zoo, and the clash competed with van
    halen for air time.


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