I am Jem, rockstar extraordinaire.

sorabji.com: Who are you?: I am Jem, rockstar extraordinaire.

BiGT83 on Saturday, December 18, 1999 - 10:45 am:

    Beware my glam-wrath.

    I am forever.

    I am time.

    I am absolution.

    I am... Jem.

By agatha on Saturday, December 18, 1999 - 01:11 pm:

    aren't you in that barbie band, "beyond pink"?

By BiGT83 on Saturday, December 18, 1999 - 01:28 pm:

    Show me a light ...

    ... and I will show you a broken dream, bent and charred like exploded silverware from a virgin's wedding banquet.

By semillama on Saturday, December 18, 1999 - 02:00 pm:

    You read that Pathetic Geek stories, too, huh?

    or are you the guy in the story?

By Gee on Saturday, December 18, 1999 - 05:09 pm:

    I still have my old Jem dolls. I had two Jem's, a Kimber(ly?) and a Pizzaz. I may have the names wrong, it's been a while.

    I used to have tons of Barbie dolls, but the only Ken doll I ever had was missing his head (don't ask). So I used to pretend the Jem dolls were guys, because they were bigger than the barbie dolls.

    I used to give my barbie and Jem dolls super powers and codenames and have them break off into teams and fight each other. A lot of the time I'd just steal powers from comic books. I really can't remember what any of my Jem dolls could do.

    The funny thing is, when I would play with G. I. Joe dolls, I'd take the few girls their were, and the boys that were wearing full face masks and pretend they were girls, and I'd pair everyone off and have them go to a party.

By Moonit on Sunday, December 19, 1999 - 12:50 am:

    I cut my one of my little ponies hair into a mohawk, and one into a mohawk with a rats tail to make them boys so the girl ponies could get laid.

    My cousin and I used to play with her silvanian families and set them up in houses and then her brother would bring along his gi joes and make it a national disaster that only he could save us from.

    When we played C.H.I.P.S I was always Ponch.

By Barbie on Sunday, December 19, 1999 - 12:47 pm:

    Fuck that slut Jem,where is she now? I,ve done it all,and I,ve been fucking G.I.Joe behind Ken,s back for years,he,s a real man.I,m going to try to hook Ken up with Gay Bob.I,m in Toy Story 2,where is Jem?Nowhere,but I,m still standing!!! HA ha ha ha!!

By Gay Bob on Sunday, December 19, 1999 - 01:27 pm:

    Barbie, girlfriend, get a grip. As if I'd fuck the likes of Ken. As if I'd take your sloppy seconds. Puh-LEEZE. You might've noticed that the boy's not even anatomically correct. And his aesthetic sensibilities? Forget it. The silly little bastard's got a thousand different outfits and not a single one of them match my drapes.

    Then again, the more I think about the whole thing, the better it sounds.

    Tell you what, darling: send over a few hits of ecstasy and a jar of Vaseline. And that little whore, Ken, of course. I'll drill his scrawny plastic ass until he screams for God.

    Oh, and you may be richer and have more marketability, but Jem's cooler. Sorry, honey. Get over yourself.

By Barbie on Sunday, December 19, 1999 - 01:56 pm:

    I can,t get over myself,I,ve hooked up with Frank Sinatra now,at $70.00 for the two of us.Yes I,ve noticed his lack of peni,why do you think I know about you? BUt I,m all for you and Ken as long as I can take pictures...hey porn star Barbie,I,ve got to call Mattle,I just had an idea!

By Gay Bob on Sunday, December 19, 1999 - 02:31 pm:

    Hmm. Our very own Barbie Dearest taking naughty pix? Well, that sounds workable. Have your agent get in touch with mine, and we'll work something out. Oh, and we'll have to throw a bone to Ken's agent, too, just in case he gets any ideas about cranking out some tiresome little lawsuit.

    Kenny and His Missing Phallus. Now, there's a band name. But his anatomical deficiencies can be worked around. After all, he still has an ass, doesn't he? And a rather nice one, as far as plastic asses go.

    Porn Star Barbie? Oh, Mother of God, GO for it! You'd look so marvelous giving rimjobs in extreme closeup. It's new, it's different, it's YOU.

By He-Man on Sunday, December 19, 1999 - 03:48 pm:

    Stop looking at my ass. I get enough of that from that bony bitch Skeletor, and it doesn't help any that She-ra only gets turned on by Ram-man.

By Barbie on Monday, December 20, 1999 - 01:22 am:

    A new more 90,s persona..."Maybe PMS Barbie".Complete with a pint of cookie dough and a bag of chips.

By Ken on Monday, December 20, 1999 - 01:34 am:

    Ms.Barbie can forget about G.I.Joe...he,s mine, at least that,s what he said last night.

By Gee on Monday, December 20, 1999 - 01:47 am:

    I don't think I like your implications, buster. She-Ra is He-Man's cousen, you pervert!

    I also had many She-Ra dolls. She was so cool.

By Gay Bob on Monday, December 20, 1999 - 03:15 am:

    Ken, you bitch. And here I was, hoping all the best for our newfound relationship.

    What does GI Joe have that I don't? Can GI Joe make your pink plastic body feel tingly all over? Can GI Joe rock your world? I ask you, does GI Joe have a wanger?

    I think not.

    Furthermore, GI Joe can't coordinate your wardrobe worth a damn. And God knows you need it. Some of that tacky shit you've been wearing lately is so out-of-control. The fashion police? No, honey, you need the entire fashion SWAT team. And that purple jacket you wore last week in Vegas might require the additional help of an exorcist.

    GI Joe. Hmph. Sure, he's got muscles. He's hot, and I'm man enough to admit it. But the more I think about you and I getting it on, Ken, the more I like it. And face it--Joe may look good, but does he read Kafka? He's built, honey, but he doesn't exactly strike me as a brainiac.

    Anyway, here's a concept: if you MUST stay with Joe, let's make it a threesome. And remember, Barbie said she'd do the photo shoot. Think about it. It's marketable.

By Moonit on Monday, December 20, 1999 - 03:59 am:

    I thought He-Man and She-Ra were brother and sister.

    By the power of Greyskull I ammmmmmm HE-MAN.

    or something.

By Ken on Monday, December 20, 1999 - 08:25 am:

    I have a limited wardrobe,obviously designed to complement but never upstage Ms.Barbie.My decision to acccessorize with an earring was immediately quashed,which I protest,for it was my decision and reflects my lifestyle choice.Bob,call me,I like your idea!!

By cyst on Monday, December 20, 1999 - 10:16 am:

    by the power of grayskull, I am THE POWER.

    I HAVE the power? isn't that how it went?

By Barbie on Monday, December 20, 1999 - 11:15 am:

    Oooooh I want that power,I want to feel that power,I want it reeaaall bad.He-Man,I,ve been wanting to hook up with you forever,an evil force,(Skelator?)has so far kept me from finding you and jumping your bones,you do have a penis don,t you?Sometimes my "girlfriends"just don,t cut it.

By Patrick on Monday, December 20, 1999 - 11:44 am:

    you people are silly!

    but i did have brief animated thoughts of these action figures and dolls conversing and so on,

    action figures and dolls? whats the difference?



By Barbie on Monday, December 20, 1999 - 12:35 pm:

    Silly? I can do anything, remember? I want Mattel stock options.It,s been 40 years-I think I deserve a piece of the action.Considering my valuable contribution to society and Mattle,I think these demands are reasonable.If they don,t like it,they can find themselfs a new bitch for Christmas.It,s that simple.

By NZA on Monday, December 20, 1999 - 11:17 pm:

    We used to cross dress the male dolls, cos they never had enough outfits!

By Gee on Tuesday, December 21, 1999 - 01:28 am:

    Maybe they were brother and sister. Yes, I think you might be right. That only makes it more sick!

    I don't know what He-Man used to say, but She-Ray would say "For the Honor of Greyskull, I am She-Ra!"

    I always thought it was interesting that He-Man was for the POWER of greyskull, and She-Ra was for the HONOR.

By Moonit on Tuesday, December 21, 1999 - 06:13 pm:

    I used to have a She-Ra doll.

    My cousin had He-Man and his assorted cronies.

    The only toys I still have from childhood are my My Little Ponies.


The Stalking Post: General goddam chit-chat Every 3 seconds: Sex . Can men and women just be friends? . Dreamland . Insomnia . Are you stoned? . What are you eating? I need advice: Can you help? . Reasons to be cheerful . Days and nights . Words . Are there any news? Wishful thinking: Have you ever... . I wish you were... . Why I oughta... Is it art?: This question seems to come up quite often around here. Weeds: Things that, if erased from our cultural memory forever, would be no great loss Surfwatch: Where did you go on the 'net today? What are you listening to?: Worst music you've ever heard . What song or tune is going through your head right now? . Obscure composers . Obscure Jazz, 1890-1950 . Whatever, whenever General Questions: Do you have any regrets? . Who are you? . Where are you? . What are you doing here? . What have you done? . Why did you do it? . What have you failed to do? . What are you wearing? . What do you want? . How do you do? . What do you want to do today? . Are you stupid? Specific Questions: What is the cruelest thing you ever did? . Have you ever been lonely? . Have you ever gone hungry? . Are you pissed off? . When is the last time you had sex? . What does it look like where you are? . What are you afraid of? . Do you love me? . What is your definition of Heaven? . What is your definition of Hell? Movies: Last movie you saw . Worst movie you ever saw . Best movie you ever saw Reading: Best book you've ever read . Worst book you've ever read . Last book you read Drunken ramblings: uiphgy8 hxbjf.bklf ghw789- bncgjkvhnqwb=8[ . Payphones: Payphone Project BBS

sorabji.com . torturechamber . px.sorabji.com . receipts . contact