Who are you?

sorabji.com: Who are you?: Who are you?

Zephyr on Sunday, July 2, 2000 - 02:34 am:

    Tell me about yourself. As much as you feel comfortable telling some insomniac, nosy, 16 year old.

    What's your name?
    Where do you live?
    How do you live?
    What do you do?
    and so on...

By Isolde on Sunday, July 2, 2000 - 02:52 am:

    My name is Isolde.
    I live in California, but I'm moving to the east coast soon for purposes of life rearrangement. I actually live in Northern California, where the fog hangs out, in a shitty town called Caspar, close to a tourist trap called Mendocino, and there is nothing for me here.
    I live in a shithole house in the middle of nowhere, because I can't afford higher rent. I drink and fuck and drink milk from the carton. I live with my father currently, which is part of the reason I'm moving, because I feel like a loser. I have two cats, one of whom is under the bed.
    I package stationary for an internationally known cardline for yuppies. Packs of 8. Sometimes twelve. Studio Z. It's not something I want to continue to do, but I have a BA in English, so there's not much else I can do at this point. I might go back to school and get my MA. I bring my CD player to work because I hate country and that's all they listen to there.
    Sowmetimes I go out with friends and do things. It seems like I spend most of my time at home or at work usually, although the summer has brought me out more. I just watched some fireworks. I eat moderately classy food, when I remember to eat. I can't keep a relationship for more than a few months. I like to swim. I drive a shitty car and don't bother to take care of it, since I'm leaving it here. I hate most modern music, I hate most modern drugs, and I hate modern life in general.
    Im one inch over the height of a legal midget. My friends tease me. I limp. I have a deformed pinky. My mother took acid while she was pregnant. I'm 1/4 blind because of an accident in grammar school. I know three languages.
    I'm me. Isolde.

By moonit on Sunday, July 2, 2000 - 11:39 pm:

    Melanie, but my friends call me Mel or Melly. Some of my friends call me moonie (dont ask drunken story). When my mum is trying to cheer me up she calls me Grub.

    I live in Christchurch, New Zealand but I dont expect you to know where that is. An old workmate of mine managed to convince an American that we'd only just got telephone lines in New Zealand and they were so stylish with the dial and you got to speak to an operator first.


    I live with my Mum and her partner John, they are trying to buy a house, well mum is and john isnt so thats nice listening to them argue. I am trying to pay off debt as fast as possible so I can get the hell out and move into a place in the central city, close to the gym and work. Where I can be alone and have my space.

    I work for an advertising agency.

    I like to read, work out, walk, cook, dance, sing (badly), bake, smoke, drink and eat chocolate.

    I love chocolate.

    My best friend has recently moved away. I dont make friends easily. I'm not one of these people who can ramble on at strangers. I find it hard to talk to people.

    I feel like running away today.

    I'm nothing.

By Tj on Monday, July 3, 2000 - 12:31 am:

    A hug for melly the grub.

By Bell_jar on Monday, July 3, 2000 - 01:36 am:

    my name is amanda.

    i live in lawrence, kansas. a college town. today everyone seems in an uproar about the possibilty of our basketball coach leaving. the athletes get away with a lot, like parking tickets and rape. after i'm done writing i might go to the fieldhouse and piss on the statue of some famous coach person. anyway, unlike the above persons i don't live with my parents or family members. i live with my ex-boyfriend. a situation that is often the cause of great sadness. but he will move out in less than a month, so ... yeah...

    i'm doing Americorps this summer writing grants for a collaborative effort on improving the lives of children in our community. i have a second job working within a homeless transitional housing facility. i'm also a student. i'll graduate next may and move my sorry ass to new york to go to law school and to be anonymous in my style of living (which is nothing extraordinary unless you're my grandmother).
    i used to eat a lot of fast food then my gallbladder started acting up so i don't eat much anymore. it's been two or three weeks and i've already lost 15 lbs. if i didn't miss ice cream so much i think i'd be happy.
    in no real particular order i like to read, to volunteer, to ride my bike, to make statues out of condoms, and to drink.

    i once had chocolate syrup come out of my nose.

    in twenty days i'll be 21.

By J on Monday, July 3, 2000 - 02:36 am:

    I can't really say too much or those cute guys in the white coats might try to put me in the cage,they got a cute little jacket for me too,the sleeves look too long though.

By Jay on Monday, July 3, 2000 - 07:27 am:

    there's a saying in alcoholics anonymous and it goes, "what you see here, what you hear here, let it stay here."
    then everyone says "here here" like some old courtroom. pretty hokie.
    so what are you writing a book. i sort of like trying to figure out who's who just from what they write.
    a friend of mine calls his grandmother grub-grub. love that.

By Zephyr on Monday, July 3, 2000 - 09:40 am:

    I really don't know what I'm doing. Maybe I'm just trying to get people to look into themselves, and be able to explain to others who and what they are. Or maybe I'm just curious. Or perhaps I'm just trying to find out about you people. Or maybe I'm trying to find out what the world is like by seeing how other people are.

    Who knows?

    It's all up to you to decide. It's your mind, so you should interpret the world as you wish.
    And tell about it.

By Zephyr on Monday, July 3, 2000 - 09:41 am:

    Actually, maybe I might write a book...I doubt it, though, but it would give me something to do.

By Isolde on Monday, July 3, 2000 - 12:36 pm:

    I know where Christchurch is.
    I also stayed across from Christchurch Cathedral when I was in Dublin.

By Cat on Monday, July 3, 2000 - 04:05 pm:

    Isolde I stayed at Jury's Inn in Dublin...it was across from the cathedral too. Same place?

    I was going to stay at some place called "Mrs Murphy's" because Joyce lived there at one point...but there were closed after some violent incident or another.

By Isolde on Monday, July 3, 2000 - 06:52 pm:

    Yes, I stayed at Jury's Christchurch Inn. My room was the one right next to the sign, so all night it felt like I had a searchlight on my bed.

By Cat on Monday, July 3, 2000 - 07:36 pm:

    The bells tolled for me...non-stop it seemed. I love Ireland..though every time I heard the accent, I kept waiting for the punchline..if you know what I mean.

By Gee on Tuesday, July 4, 2000 - 01:06 am:

    don't say you're Nothing, Moony. I think you're swell.

    I've decided that I'm going to dye part of my hair pink. I had a dream where I dyed my bangs, and about three inches of the back of my hair brilliant pink. I liked it, so I decided to do it next weekend.

    Bright pink or a purply pink? So hard to decide.

By Isolde on Tuesday, July 4, 2000 - 03:30 am:

    That happened to me too. It sucked.

By Pilate on Tuesday, July 4, 2000 - 06:01 am:

    My name is Lee. I live alone. I live like any other insane reclusive man in Arkansas. My parents are long dead and I've been on my own since my mid-teens. Um, what else? Okay, some past history that you can feel free to skip: I once lost my heart (and virginity) to a teacher at boarding school. He broke my heart. He told me I was special, not like the others. I believed his bullshit. Eventually, people found out about the whole incident and I had to be pulled out of school because I'd apparently tarnished the teacher's good name by allowing him to seduce me. I was the school's top student. Scholarship kid. Academics were the only thing I'd ever done well at. Suddenly I was kicked out of school. I was a nobody, lower than dirt. My father, who'd abandoned me years ago, came waltzing back into my life. My mother was already dead. The old man was surprisingly cool about the whole matter, and also about the fact that I was gay beyond all hope of rehabilitation. He and I were reconciled. He moved me into his home, several states away. I was happy. Then my father died in a car crash. Sometime later, I graduated high school. I traveled around a bit. Got a degree I'll never use. Now I live a quiet life. Get laid when I can, get buzzed when I can. I don't say much and I never did. I'm quiet as a mouse. Quiet as a rat with big long rabid sharpened fangs. I have dark hair and intense dark eyes. I hate phoniness and stereotypical behavior. But I do like ice cream sandwiches. Goodnight.

By Fetidbeaver on Wednesday, July 5, 2000 - 05:26 am:

    Not that it matters, but what do you do for a living? Oh yeah, HI!

By Jay on Wednesday, July 5, 2000 - 08:34 am:

    ice cream sandwiches rock. there's something motherfucking american.
    i had oatmeal and vanilla ice cream yesterday and it kicked ass.
    went to an amusement park yesterday and there was almost nobody there. no lines for the rollercoasters. that ruled.
    i enjoy good literature. mostly american but i'm easy. a good books a good book.
    i used to have a drug and alcohol problem but i've gotten over that. i still like rock music though.
    i play guitar. i believe in God and evolution.
    my favorite artists are Monet, Pollock, Haring and the guy who drew Bloom County.
    i live in florida where its hot and everyone finds it necessary to bitch about it.

By Pilate on Wednesday, July 5, 2000 - 09:12 am:

    Jesus Tapdancing Christ. I blame Crimson for my previous post. I was at her place getting smashed and she LET me make that post, dammit. I should never post anything online when I'm loaded. The childhood confessional was just some shit I've been thinking about lately. Sorting out some emotional baggage. Jerking off my psyche. I don't generally talk about my past. Now you can see why. It's a fucking bore.

    My name is Pilate. I'm a mad librarian. I'm also a jerk of all trades for the illustrious Ms. Crimson (we work for the same mail-order company). Crimson and Ren should start charging me rent, as much time as I spend over at their place. And I should never, ever EVER drink tequila.

    But I still like ice cream sandwiches.

By crimson on Wednesday, July 5, 2000 - 09:51 am:

    my name is crimson. i'm from buttfuck, arkansas. i live in the ozarks, where god grows all the best ass-scratching, shit-kicking hillbillies.

    i play guitar. i write. i sing. i ship boxes. i make jewelry. i have a gerbil. a husband, too. i'm posable & come w/ my own handy carrying case. i have x-ray vision, but it only works on teenage boys.

    like pilate, i'm a virgo. virgo the virgin. smell the virginity wafting from me like a delicate springtime breeze. my other friend who posts here, pug, is an aquarius. my most insane & inexplicable friends tend to be aquarians. not that i believe in lame-ass bullshit like astrology (i'm just thinking about astrology, because an aquaintance of mine recently told me that all of my problems stem from being a virgo). & here i was, thinking that all my problems came from being human. damn.

    i'm fucking nuts, but basically harmless. no, really. i won't hurt you.

    i live w/ a karate instructor who writes vulgar, brilliant fiction. my best (& damn near only) buddies are a pair of deranged filmmakers, a perverse bastard of a librarian, & an anarchist dyke.

    i also like ice cream sandwiches. but i like eskimo pies better. you know, the chocolate-coated ice cream bars. yum.

By agatha on Wednesday, July 5, 2000 - 03:11 pm:

    agatha- my real name is kelsey. i live in olympia, washington, about an hour away from seattle. i moved here two years ago to finish my college degree at the hippie school, and now i'm working at kinko's again because i can't find anything else and my liberal arts degree is for shit. in my spare time, i like to do printmaking. i especially like making woodcuts. i have a six year old daughter named cleo, and i live with her dad dave aka friendly aka ________ in a little tiny house with a big garage. we have a dog named truck and three cats named randall, sajak, and fluffah. we used to have another dog named stella, but she died not too long ago. our family never has any money because we don't make very much and spend it all wastefully, so money is the greatest source of tension in our household. i wish it weren't this way. dave has been spending a lot of time in the garage lately, doing god knows what. he is trying to get a new job, and so am i. he is closer to achieving this goal than i am, seeing as how i have very few marketable skills. our daughter is smart and beautiful. i waste a lot of time, and this is one of the ways i do it. i guess that's about it.

By Bell_jar on Wednesday, July 5, 2000 - 04:02 pm:

    i once knew a ryn from arkansas. he had all of the qualities of a nice guy, but he didn't make it there. he ended up coming quite short of even being a decent guy.

    come to think of it, i know a lot of people from arkansas. one of my best friends lives in fayetteville. crazy girl. i find it funny that there university has a poultry science department. from what i saw it was the nicest, most modern building on campus.

By patrick on Wednesday, July 5, 2000 - 04:13 pm:

    i am patrick

    i live in hollywood, ca. I work for a gay porn company. we publish magazines. we are the oldest in the business. My goal is to elevate this company to the Larry Flint of gay publishing, single-handedly. i have a wife named nico. She is a hottie red head, whom I love dearly, I end up screwing things up for us more times than not. She has quite a sense of patience. I am a scorpio and she is an aquarius, technically we are arch enemies, and sometimes we are. We have good sex though to patch things up.

    My two immoral cats are named Karenin and Isabella.

    I live on a hill with a good view. Although little things break often and easily in my house.

    I photograph on nights and weekends. Mostly, women sometimes naked but mostly clothed one way or another. I do try my hand at more journalistic/editiorial materials...but unfortunately i am often too shy to point my camera at a stranger and take their picture. I am working on a portfiolio i can live with for more than 2 days and then hopefully i can shoot for a living without compromising myself.

    My wife is a designer for a lame, sexist japanese company. She is working on getting another job, ideally in NYC. She creates textiles and finished garments for a few med to high end designers. She primarly does sweaters.

    I do recreational drugs, or rather drugs for recreation. Im also a lush.

By crimson on Wednesday, July 5, 2000 - 05:33 pm:

    yes, indeed, bell jar...the U of A poultry science department is hot shit. it regularly hands out major scholarships. i don't know if it's still true, but a few years ago, they were BEGGING for people to enter scintillating careers in poultry science. they were giving out scholarships like crazy. really nice scholarships.

    i figure that there's gotta be a way to scam an education out of this. like maybe sign up w/ the poultry sci geeks. major in chicken guts for a couple of years on scholarship...& then suddenly change your major to something more meaningful, like psychoanalytic literary criticism in arabic.

    chicken is god here in the ozarks. you can be a chicken plucker, an eviscerator, or a chicken farmer, or pursue other noble careers in the poultry arts. some people here have major respiratory diseases from chicken mites, chicken feathers, & chickenshit. chicken processors are always advertising for jobs. they hire tons of illegal immigrants. nearly our entire goddamn economy can be summed up in a KFC bucket. oh, yeah, & wal-mart, which is the other half of the economy. wal-mart world headquarters is just up the road a piece. you can't believe how rich some people have gotten off wal-mart (& off of chicken, too). funny thing about the chicken & beef around here...it's so hormone-laden that there's a bumper crop of menstruating 7-year olds & junior high girls w/ ovarian cancer. it fucks up your hormones somehow. it never gets in the news & even a lot of locals are shielded from this unpleasant truth...until it happens in their families. but as long as folks are getting rich, what the hell.

    cellular mutation: it's finger-lickin' good.

By semillama on Wednesday, July 5, 2000 - 06:54 pm:

    I am Semillama also Andy but only nonelectronically-yet another character in this ongoing weird-ass book of Sorabji.

    I am more convinced we all are in a book, but only here and are real otherwise, if that makes any sense.

    I am an archaeologist in Wisconsin. Hopefully soon to be an archaeologist anywhere else but. I live by myself, surrounded by Wisconsin rednecks, in a 2-bedroom townhouse. I have a cat, who has a new punk-rock collar. I listen to all sorts of music and like incomprehnisble humor, such as Space Ghost and professional wrestling. All my friends pretty much are on the west coast right now. I used to play in bands but not currently.
    I work on an Army Reserve post. I pick ticks off me abotu every other day and worry a lot about how the hell am I supposed to get this damn waterlogged mill excavated before my volunteer supply dries up. I come here a lot because I have not met anyone I can connect to here in Wisconsin and am damn lonely. I suck at relationships although I am very respectful of women and their needs, when I can figure out what they are.

    I like to visit my friends and have so little time to do that. I sometimes make plans I can't carry out. I am very ethical and responsible, which has probable kept me from happiness more than a few times.

By PeriPheral on Wednesday, July 5, 2000 - 07:14 pm:

    I, too, am an Arkie. Just moved back to Little Rock from Fayetteville after living there and going to school for about five years. I really love it there, and I intend to move back whenever my wife and I finish up school here in LR. Now, I'm trying to find a job in healthcare and medicine. This process is a frustrating one...seems you have to know lots of people in the field to get anywhere. But I've got an interview tomorrow, so things could be looking up.
    I live (lately) surfing the web and smoking cigarettes. I actually stumbled into this site while searching for the address and phone number of the deli I worked at years ago in Fayetteville. I needed it for an application. All of a sudden, there's a reference I recognized, "Have you ever gazed upon the face of the Boognish?" So I had to check out sorabji.
    I also play the same songs over and over again on my guitar. I gaze at my tropical fish. They love daphnia...one thing I never found in Fayetteville. I look for any excuse to drive my wife's car around, because mine's a piece of crap. I recently painted the trunk with this rust-proofing paint, so now it's conspicuously two-toned.
    I fly by the seat of my pants.

By Nate on Wednesday, July 5, 2000 - 08:01 pm:

    1. my name is nate.

    2. i live in the mountains in santa cruz county, CA.

    3. i like to consume beer, wine, bourbon, rum, gin, vodka, beer, marijuana, red meat and pussy.

    4. i work for a software company in the silicon valley. i am an engineer. our software is not of the "shrinkwrapped" variety. we are pre-IPO.

    5. i have two cats, nica and ariel. a plumhead parakeet (parrot) named kaya. i have a collection of fish, both in tank and in my backyard. the fish in my backyard are trout, and the largest is named "Katsuo". the smaller ones are not named. the ones in the tank are named maguro, hamachi and hirame.

    6. i try to be the resident asshole, but someone always out does me. pricks. in real life i'm a real nice guy. generous, kind, thoughtful, merciless.

    7. pot. beer.

    8. i live with my favorite woman, A. she's a cancer. i'm an aries. it's not supposed to work.

    9. i subscribe to the mother jones and playboy. i read the articles in playboy. i mostly get mother jones for the pictures.

    10. i've been smoking a lot of pot and drinking a lot of beer for the past few days. and watching a lot of MTV, so my mind is a little fucked.

By crimson on Wednesday, July 5, 2000 - 08:12 pm:

    i was in LR over the weekend. went to the zoo. i nearly had a heat stroke by the bobcat cage. anyway, my best girl-buddy lives in LR. i used to live there, myself, in southwest LR (also downtown LR, & off markham). it seemed like a better city, somehow, when i was younger...when the whores were still working 9th street & there were head shops all over the place & everybody was horny & bored. going back to LR reminds me of being in my early teens & getting laid a lot. it was sordid, but that's the stuff that memories are made of. LR was a shabby, tawdry little city & i was a shabby, tawdry little girl. it worked out perfectly.

By Cat on Wednesday, July 5, 2000 - 08:46 pm:

    My name is Anita but no one ever calls me that. It's always Kit, Kitten, Kitty, Kit Kat...anything with a baby feline reference.

    It's all because one time I curled up and went to sleep at a party. I suppose it could be worse considering some of the things I've done at public celebrations.

    I post here under "Cat" because it feels more grown-up. I am 4 in cat years.

    I earn my living by being incredibly curious and not being able to keep my mouth shut. Other people call it journalism.

    I was going to be a ballerina. I was for a little while to fund my degree, but I wasn't very good. Now I just have the World's ugliest toes, but I can still do the splits (with enough Vodka I'll prove it)

    I'm going through the longest self-enforced single stretch in my life. Up until six months ago, I was a serial relationship kind of girl. I'm trying to break that pattern and have made a vow never again to be with someone because:

    a) I feel sorry for them
    b) I don't think I can do better
    c) I tell myself it doesn't matter if they bore me, they're nice and that's what counts.
    d) They're so possessive I'm afraid they'll kill themselves if we break up.

    So I'll probably end up with someone who fits all four criteria. I just hope they are more stable than me, so our offspring have a chance of inheriting some responsible genes.

    I travel a lot for my work and for my own joy. I have seen some things I would rather not have seen in war zones, and cried with the sheer beauty of other far-off places (is that sounding like a Kate Bush song?)

    Sometimes I wish I didn't travel alone so much, because I hate the empty feeling of walking through an airport gate alone, knowing there is no one waiting for me anywhere.

    I cook...In fact, I am a kick ass cook. I love poetry, but my attempts suck. I have millions of books because I can never bear to part with them. I am wanted by libraries all over the World.

    I'm passionate about a zillion things, but I get bored easily. I have lots of nightmares, and I hate waking up alone.

    What else, this doesn't look like much to sum me up. But maybe that's all there is.

By Gee on Wednesday, July 5, 2000 - 11:53 pm:

    you seem like a nice girl.

    I wanted to curl up on the floor and go to sleep at work tonight, but the carpet there smells bad.

By agatha on Wednesday, July 5, 2000 - 11:58 pm:

    the people here are so cool, sometimes it amazes me. it makes me feel kind of boring.

By TBone on Thursday, July 6, 2000 - 01:14 am:

    I am TBone. Also known as a Ben when there aren't too many other Ben's around. My roommate is a Ben also.

    TBone, in my case, has nothing directly to do with the steak. It has a lot to do with a song called Existential Blues.

    I'm really old now. I turned 20 in June. I love to do lots of things, but I get distracted easily. I've abandoned more hobbies (hopefully not forever) than most people take part in in a lifetime. Some current ones involve african drumming, writing (poetry, but I'm starting some work on fiction) and playing Go.

    I have an irrational fear of Velvet. I do not fear The Velvet Underground.

    I strongly dislike most popular music. The TV and I share a mutual hatred. Especially MTV, which is out to get me.

    I grew up in Montana. The big city of Billings, to be precise. I try to never, ever go there. I currently live in Missoula, MT. That will probably only last until I graduate.

    I am a Toy fiend. I love toys. My taste for toys has gotten a great deal more expensive as I've grown up though.

    I am deeply and madly in love with a girl. She can find no fault in anyone but herself, where she finds every fault she can dream up. I adore her, though she cries.

    I like to wear hats. Unusual ones.

    Cats I've lived with: Pimp, Jinx, Tinsel, Comet, Cupid, Blues, Jazz, Bob, King, and Spike.

    I really love telling stories. That's why I haven't stopped yet.

    I am a Software tester when I'm not in classes. I find bugs in 911/Police records systems.

    I went to college a year before all my friends. I liked it before. This last year felt like HighSchool again.

    I drive a VW Rabbit Diesel that I bought from Portland through ebay. Before that I drove a dilapidated Toyota truck with Penguins painted on it.

    As unAmerican as it may seem, I don't drink, smoke or partake of any illegal drugs. I drink LOTS of caffeine.

    I am a Gemini.

    That's a little of who I am today. Tomorrow will probably be different.

By Daniel ssss on Thursday, July 6, 2000 - 02:29 am:

    Aw hell. You'll know who I am better than I do.

    My name is Dan but my business card says Daniel, and my father dead over twenty years called me Dutch. I post under Daniel ssss because there are two many Daniels in the world of sorabji.

    I have long waist length gray hair and get mistaken for some of my biker clients. I have a post doc in legal, medical, and technical writing but I can't type very well. I specialize in teaching documentation standards although as a clinician I seldom get to do this where I work. I make a decent living working with priests who are pedophiles, drunks who killed people, acid burnouts who sound alot like, well, you know, meth cooks fried to the skull bone, and other assorted psychiatric patients.

    And I teach other counselors and helpers to counsel less and heal rather than help. My job description says I am an international consultant. I believe that most therapy is bullshit.

    I live outside St. Louis MO US in the Ozarks in the hills at the end of a ridge at the end of a road about twenty minutes from the hospital, and watch the trees grow in my spare time. I am a father of two wonderful teenage sons, and when I am not traveling, at the hospital, or in Aruba, I hang out at Anna Maria Island Florida. Or play recluse in the forest in which I live now.

    I have a deer named Anawasele, many crickets but no cats, dogs, or domesticated animals at all. I used to recycle behaviorally disordered Dobermans, Sheperds, Airedales, and Dalmations, but I travel too much now. I left hospital administration over ten years ago to reduce my salary and stress level and do something I felt compelled to do: have fun in my job.

    I haven't had drink or drug for over thirteen years. When I was drinking, I used to build boats, restore wooden craft, write books and training materials, was a corporate ghost, taught college comp, lit, and technical writing. Big drinking these last two. I don't believe in cohesive paragraphs anymore. I have contributed to a few websites. I write poetry for the Heathers, Sarahs and Andreas in my life, not necessarily the ones here by those names. I get high by knowing I am dying a little each day and therefore living each day to the fullest.

    I am single, financially secure, somewhat analytical, and wrong alot about my opinions, but no one cares. I am a good father who knows nothing about parenting, and was married for 17 years, and have two other children who died in the seventies. Surviving is interesting. I used to have a fish tank. Now I drum, teach therapeutic drumming, lead workshops in shapeshifting.

    I want to visit Ireland again, am currently studying Celtic mysticism with Tom Cowan, and grow herbs in my garden. I offer free counseling to all sorabjites in need.

    This more than you need to know.

By Cat on Thursday, July 6, 2000 - 06:07 am:

    I know what you mean Agatha...it's kinda intimidating being surrounded by people who do stuff I just talk about doing one day.

    But no chick who knows as much about poultry politics could ever be classed "boring" (get the chick/poutry thing? Damn I'm a witty kitty..somebody desex me, quick)

By Fetidbeaver on Thursday, July 6, 2000 - 08:23 pm:

    I call myself Fetidbeaver and will not disclose my real name. I was born in Iowa but I feel at home in Los Angeles. As a kid I was sent to catholic high school to try to "straighten me out" I had a brother 10 & 1/2 months younger than me. We were best friends/partners in crime :o) In 7th grade I broke into trains and stole their flares, we would make fake bombs with timers then call in bomb scares. When we got older we made real bombs. Then we got cars a began street racing. I caused a million dollar accident drag racing a local attorney's son who was driving daddy's Porche. A friend in my car got a tripple broken neck. Then I went into the Air Force under delayed enlistment for a gauranteed job, but after basic training the said that the could not honor it because I failed the security clearance. (due to a short time in The John Birch Society) So I took the honorable discharge and went home. I painted cars for about a year, quit that and became a Diesel Mechanic. Moved to California and ended up working for ARB INC. repairing their construction equipment. Made big bucks with them. Met my wife there. Then my brother (was a fireman) was killed fighting a fire that unexpectedly flashed beneath them killing him and another fireman. Between that and a little problem I had developed (with a certain chemical recreation) I decided to move back to Iowa, a decision I still regret. My wife began drinking (boredom) and the marriage began to be strained. She moved back to L.A. 3 weeks ago. The plan is for us both to take a little time getting our shit together, sell this house and get back together in L.A. Oh, I forgot. 10 years ago I stopped being a diesel mechanic and became a male R.N. Now I want to return to school and become a coroner. OR if we don't get back together, quit work and ride box cars for a year or more. OR just work until the arsonist that killed my brother gets out of prision and then kill him. I'm not really sure what I want to do "when I grow up"

By Isolde on Thursday, July 6, 2000 - 10:55 pm:

    I passed out at work today. Literally. I collapsed over a huge pile of forms.

By Daniel ssss on Friday, July 7, 2000 - 12:44 am:

    How long is a cat year?

By Jay on Friday, July 7, 2000 - 08:05 am:

    i was wondering that myself. sometimes at work i have to look through a microscope for extended periods. i get this sensation that i'm in this huge room looking up at this giant screen. which is actually what i'm looking at under the scope. it's hard to describe in words. anyway it never fails to make me sleepy. i often nod off into those quick dreams that are really really strange. i'm always afraid someones going to walk in and i'll be passed out right there with my eyes against the lenses.

By Cat on Friday, July 7, 2000 - 08:27 pm:

    7 human years = 1 cat year.

By Biro on Saturday, July 8, 2000 - 02:34 am:

    I have a personal liking for zoning out...... I love it when I am talking to someone and my mind is off on a tangent...... then its oops, what did he/she say? And talking of cats, my Male, cat, and I say that only because my female cat doesn't do this, my male cat had poop the size of eggs hanging of his butt. Have already said this but is that a male thing? Do male cats not care they are walking around with huge wads of crap hanging out of their arse? Now I have to retrace everywhere he has been...... too gross. My female cat (woody) has never done that.

By Jay on Saturday, July 8, 2000 - 05:58 pm:

    it's because your female cat licks them off with her tongue before giving you a big kiss.
    ohhh goooody wooooody woooooody's so goooooody woooody.
    i probably should have asked you this years ago, but whats up with a female cat named woody?

By TBone on Tuesday, August 8, 2000 - 01:22 am:

    I had a female cat named pimp...

By Trace on Wednesday, August 9, 2000 - 10:30 am:

    My Name is Trace, and I am 27. I live in KC, MO. I am male (very male), married to a wonderful wife with just one hang up, she does not like sex!
    Although that is not the most important issue in a marriage, it does cause strain.
    We have 2 daughters, one I inherited when we married, and the other was just born in July of 99. She weight 1 lb, 12 oz. She will be the last baby we have.
    We have been married for 3 years.
    My kid's names, oldest to younges are: Hayley and Mikayla. My wife's name is Erin.
    I am an MCSE, working for Birch Telecom in the IT Department, trying to get into NT Admin

By Trace on Wednesday, August 9, 2000 - 10:34 am:

By Antithesis on Thursday, August 10, 2000 - 07:40 am:

    I suppose the time has come:

    Hi. I'm 21 and I live in Fort Bragg, CA, just north of a tourist trap called Mendocino. I quit college after a year of english-majordom, and am utterly unable to cope with smalltown life. I pretend to be a writer, but I've been unable to come up with anything decent in so long that my muse must be collecting dust, or unemployment benefits, or both. I am a deep and shallow believer in the precepts of Discordianism, as laid forth by the Goddess Eris and my pineal gland. I've developed anarchist tendencies due to my close proximity to people who keep getting arrested for silly things like human rights, labor rights, and basic statesmashing. I work for a small publishing company, where I've just been moved from production (typesetting and design) to some vague administrative / marketing duties because my boss lacks the gumption to fire me. I have one daughter, whose mother is obstinate and tenacious in her attempts to make my life harder, mainly by keeping me from seeing said daughter. I spend 5 hours a day at work on the computer, and another 5 at home, I just quit smoking, and I drink too much. Oh. and I hate the word "I." Go figure. Last month sometime, life was halted, disrupted, and re-arranged by the brick wall that is infatuation with someone who has decided to move 3000 frickin' miles away. So most of my time that isn't spent working or computering is spent trying not to scare Isolde away; I don't understand women, and I'm an aquarius. I have one cat, who may or may not have crucified Christ. He's not telling, and I'm afraid to ask.

By Isolde on Thursday, August 10, 2000 - 03:42 pm:

    (Don't believe a word he says.)

By Antithesis on Thursday, August 10, 2000 - 04:39 pm:

    HEY! did I make editorial comments about your friggin' intro? cut me some slack. I is who I is.


By patrick on Thursday, August 10, 2000 - 05:52 pm:

    drop me a line kids if you make it here, i'm a lush too, and well i can probably get you back on the nicotine train again......im running low on weed though.

    no violence in LA though. keep it simple, be loud and and be heard but don't start breakin shit, i live here and don't want my shit broken.

By Mavis on Thursday, August 10, 2000 - 06:27 pm:

    i love LA...
    i'm going there in late spetember
    to visit some pals in burbank and south pasadena.

    i have this weird thing about palm trees. i took about 300 photos of them last august.

By patrick on Thursday, August 10, 2000 - 06:39 pm:

    burbank? (shivers) ugh!

By Mavis on Thursday, August 10, 2000 - 06:44 pm:

    yeah, that's what i said when i saw it.
    since it's a recording studio--a dark, cool, dry, windowless sonically amazing pit--it may as well be in burbank.

By Cat on Thursday, August 10, 2000 - 06:48 pm:

    You blokes take care in LA. Wish I could be there, I love fireworks...looking forward to reading the posts.

    And Patrick, you baton down the hatches and don't let anyone do bad things to you...unless it's Nico.

By Zephyr on Thursday, August 10, 2000 - 07:00 pm:

    Yes...have fun in LA and don't get in any trouble...I wanna go! (kinda...sorta)

    I've never been to california, actually.

By Mavis on Thursday, August 10, 2000 - 07:19 pm:

    well, the last time i went there i ended up in someone's grad project film, and at quentin tarantino's converted garage theater watching a pre-release copy of "teaching mrs tingle" blechh.
    and i had drunk so much that i couldn't leave. plus, when introduced to fiona apple, i just kept inappropriately giggling and giggling.....so, a word to the wise---if you ever get asked to go to mr tarantino's girlfriends birthday party as a favor to a friend (read: so you, the sober one, can navigate the jetta up mulholland), say

By patrick on Thursday, August 10, 2000 - 07:36 pm:

    i lived in Burrrrrrrrbank for a year before i moved over the hill.....fucking suburb, and its incorporated so they have their own cops who are more hellbent than the LAPD.........bunch old ladies and studio execs in burbank

    pasadena is nice, there is a kick ass record store there, called Poobah Records, i highly recommend it for cheap vinyl. Lots of great history and jazz spots there, however they fucked up 'Old Town" with Gap, Crate & Barrel and the sort....they are tryign to the do that to Hollywood Blvd.

    if i see any "anarchists" in my neighborhood, im gonna grab one of those trendy skooters and go "Roy" on their ass.

By Mavis on Thursday, August 10, 2000 - 07:40 pm:

    pasadena reminds me of rochester michigan...

    they have rose flavored ice cream there!

By Zephyr on Thursday, August 10, 2000 - 10:00 pm:

    Wow. My sister liked to chew on rose petals...I guess they taste good...

By Jay on Thursday, August 10, 2000 - 11:37 pm:

    there are some great mountain bike trails along that river/gorge type thing that runs through pasadena near the rose bowl. if you're into that sort of thing.
    i think i'll be in L.A in october.
    can't wait to coast down coldwater without hitting the brakes.

By Daniel ssss to Cat on Friday, August 11, 2000 - 01:27 am:

    Hey Ms.Cat...where you travelling these days? I like what you say the way you say it about books, poetry, wanted by libraries. Keep writing. Give us some o that badass poetry you keep talking about.

By Cat on Friday, August 11, 2000 - 08:08 am:

    Daniel...There is nothing as boring as other people's travel stories. But there is also nothing as delightful as being asked to share one. That being said...I've just come back from a quick trip to Hong Kong, just four short days, but enough time to visit my favourite slice of bitumen in the East...Cat Street.

    Of course, the name appeals, though I doubt they named it for me. It's quite high on HK Island, in a winding back lane, known for antique shops selling everything from priceless ming-something vases to cheap made-in-Korea bronze trinkets.

    There's a simple buddhist temple there, a contradiction to the skyscrapers closer to the Bay. The temple oozes with the most professional beggars I have yet to encounter. You would gladly give them your shirt, so great are their entreaties. They probably drive Mercedes, and all karma to them if they do.

    No poetry sorry...that is only for the people who love me enough to forgive my paltry efforts. A small audience, sadly, but a kind and worthy mob.

By semillama on Friday, August 11, 2000 - 09:02 am:

    Pasadena's that bad?

    You never mentioned this Tarantino/Apple thing to me, Mavis?

By Mavis on Friday, August 11, 2000 - 11:53 am:

    i didn't? oh my god how did i forget that?

    the thing that really really bugged my about that quentin guy was that he has the most fucking amazing kitchen on earth, completely outfitted with every type of cooking device and gorgeous cookware, all of which his gal said he never ever has used even once.

    makes me cry. i wish i had a magic kitchen full of cookware.

By Antigone on Monday, November 12, 2001 - 03:48 am:

    I can't believe I never signed the register.

    My name is Greg. As far as I know I'm 31, but due to nonlocal strange quantum interactions I may really be 100,711,433. I think about wierd shit all the time and my goal is to actually do some of it and change everything. I may have a slight chance at that, but I hope, in the course of failing miserably at this endeavor, I'll lead a relatively interesting life.

    I've recently rediscovered that I fall in love way too fucking easily, and often inappropriately. I could try to stop, but hey I've got to live life, even if it rips my nuts off occasionally. They seem to reattach pretty well.

    I fancy myself a writer, and I'm fairly musically talented. I sometimes get paid to play the bass trombone, but only barely enough to get into the musician's union. I'd like to eventually get paid to write fiction, but the desire to get good enough at it just isn't there, so I just keep a journal. The little lies I tell myself are fiction enough, for now. (Look, there was another one!)

    I program computers for a living, and hope to eventualy program them in a way that lets them think and feel for themselves. The first time a computer has his nuts ripped off, I think my life will be complete. Then I'll upload my essential bits into one of them and live for another 100,711,433 years, and at least that time I'll know my ass from a hole in the ground, existentially speaking of course. I mean, fuck this "you are the universe" shit. I was the universe before I was born, and it was BORING.

By Nate on Monday, November 12, 2001 - 05:39 am:

    mine is mostly wrong now. i guess i didn't know who i was.

By heather on Monday, November 12, 2001 - 07:14 am:

    i am eating the best turkey sandwich ever

    mom-roasted-turkey, cranberry, a scrap of stuffing, on challah

    my mom made me thanksgiving because i'll be gone
    she is great

    in twelve hours i'll be in newark. lovely newark.

    i loved reading those again

By Spider on Monday, November 12, 2001 - 08:12 am:

    Newark, NJ or DE or OH?

By heather on Monday, November 12, 2001 - 09:35 am:


    but shit

    i guess not

By Margret on Monday, November 12, 2001 - 10:19 am:

    I don't think you're flying into the new york area today, heather, sorry.

By J on Monday, November 12, 2001 - 10:40 am:

    I pray that it was just an accident but today IS vetrans day,this just goes from bad to worse.

By Nate on Monday, November 12, 2001 - 11:37 am:

    she's going.


By LoneStranger on Monday, November 12, 2001 - 12:27 pm:

    Yea... I don't think many people are flying into the New York area at all today.

    Very shitty. If it not an accident, it will do more to damage the airlines than Sept 11 did.


By heather on Monday, November 12, 2001 - 01:56 pm:

    nope. tomorrow.

By pez on Monday, November 12, 2001 - 05:31 pm:

    i am 19, sell computer games for a living, and
    can't afford to buy lunch for the next two weeks
    or so.

    rent and utilities to pay, packages to mail. and
    of course i've been drooling all over a
    keyboard at work and so i'm buying that with
    my next paycheck.

    i was going to get free lunch today (a friend of
    mine works at macheesemo) and visit with
    her, but she went home two hours early. i'm
    lucky because i found a banana in my
    backpack and greig brought cookies to the

    i am the only girl in my store that most men
    can look up to. yesterday was my first day,
    and one guy's idea of welcoming me was to
    lean on the counter and stare. "do you play
    basketball?" was the refrain of the day.

    gray, but not raining.

    i got my hair cut one week and a half ago. it
    barely touches my shoulders and i've only
    combed it once since.

By LoneStranger on Tuesday, November 13, 2001 - 11:02 am:

    Buy bulk. It's cheaper, as long as you can find a way to store whatever it is so it doesn't go bad before you eat it.

    Did the banana just appear in your backpack? Or id you put it there, anticipating possible setbacks in the lunch department?

    Did you smack that guy? He deserves it.

    Gray, but not raining here either. It's nice after yesterday's showers. I say let it rain when I don't have class, but please oh please let it be dry when I do.

    I'm sure the hair looks beautiful.


By pez on Tuesday, November 13, 2001 - 01:33 pm:

    i put the banana in my backpack, then forgot about it.

    i can't buy in bulk very well, because i don't have a way to get it home. it's just that i overspent a couple weeks ago. it just means i make home lunches for awhile.

    the hair is easy to care for.

By Spider on Tuesday, November 13, 2001 - 02:31 pm:

    Pez, are you trying to grow dreads?

By LoneStranger on Tuesday, November 13, 2001 - 02:46 pm:

    Overspending... yes... I am familiar with that.

    I overspend and then forget that I need to underspend afterward.

    I hope you had put the banana in the backpack only a couple days before you ate it. Otherwise, it would have been better off going into some kind of banana bread.

    Mmm... I have some of that in the dorms... I should have brought it along with me. I am starving right now.

    Only an hour and fifteen to go until I get to eat lunch.

    Let's see what the Dining Commons has for lunch:

    Grilled Ham and Cheese or Cheese Sandwiches
    Kung Pao Chicken
    Thai Tofu
    Curly Fries
    Steamed Jasmine Rice
    Fresh Broccoli Florets

    I could probably eat a ham and chees sandwich. Maybe some curly fries too.

    But I'll probalby start off with some stirfry that they offer every day. Chicken, broccoli, carrots, sprouts and chili paste.


    Oh. Who am I?

    I suppose I should answer that at some point or another. But not now.


By moonit on Tuesday, November 13, 2001 - 03:09 pm:

    wtf is a snickerdoodle?

By The Watcher on Tuesday, November 13, 2001 - 03:09 pm:


    Hasn't anyone told you... Computers don't have nuts. Their all female.

    Of course they can make you crazy enough to rip off you own. I've seen that happen;)

By LoneStranger on Tuesday, November 13, 2001 - 03:39 pm:

    I don't know what a snickerdoodle is. It's at the end of the list, so I assume it is the 'dessert' type item. I'll find out today and let you all know.

    I'm puzzled too.

    I once lost a nut inside the computer. Good thing I had a magnetic screwdriver.


By Platypus on Tuesday, November 13, 2001 - 03:53 pm:

    A snickerdoodle is a cookie rolled in cinnamon sugar.

    Very tasty.

    Broccoli florets, however, sound ominous.

By Czarina on Tuesday, November 13, 2001 - 04:04 pm:

    Pez,comb your hair.

    Rodents will nest in there if you don't.

    Its hard to get dates,when rats live in your hair.

    I make snickerdoodles all the time.Yuuuuummmy.

By Hal on Tuesday, November 13, 2001 - 04:12 pm:

    Snickedoodles are REALLY good cookies...

    Pez, stray from the Dreds. get your hair cut to shoulder length or less... Wash daily...

    That is easy to take care of not time consuming, and small animals will not want to nest in your head.

    As a deturant for anyone who plans on growing some dreds... When they did the autopsy on Bob Marly they found 4 new species of spiders living in his hair. That is not something I want living in my head which is why A: I wash my hair everyday, and B: I don't fear the fact that I will be as bald as a cue ball by the time I'm 30.

By Spider on Tuesday, November 13, 2001 - 04:18 pm:

    I heard they found 22 species of lice in his hair, or something. Ick.

    Besides, if you don't wash your scalp, you'll smell really bad.

By Czarina on Tuesday, November 13, 2001 - 04:18 pm:

    Again,I applaud you,Hal,on giving sound advice.

By patrick on Tuesday, November 13, 2001 - 05:23 pm:

    washing you hair daily can be bad for your hair.

    where did pez say she was growing dreds?

    a pal of mine in high school grew dreds. the whiteboy version. he was successful in terms of style.

    but he went from being a reddish/brown straight haired kid to an insanely curely blonde. i mean kinky curly after he cut them off. fucked up his hair good.

    didn't seem to affect his abilities to be a hero with the ladies though.

By Eri on Tuesday, November 13, 2001 - 07:49 pm:

    My name is Erin. My friends call me Eri. I'm a homemaker. I have two children. During my free time I do community theater (typically summer). I play violin (I suck at it). I love interior decorating. I read constantly.

    I am 27 (but I feel old lately). I have kinky curly brown/black hair and green eyes.

    My life is pretty simplistic for the most part, but I love it. The only downside is that it can sometimes be lonely, but fortunately I have good friends.

By Dani on Tuesday, November 13, 2001 - 08:56 pm:

    My hair is almost down to my ass and I wash it daily and brush it daily and it always smells delicious. I found a new conditioner. It's called Willow Lake and I love it alot.
    If I didnt brush my hair for a week, not only would I have knots from hell, I wouldnt be able to look in the mirror or leave the house because of embarrassment.
    Hair is the first thing people notice in my opinion. And then eyes and lips and teeth. All need to be taken care of on a daily basis. Preporation H for the hangover bags under the eyes was my first job this morning. Good as new shortly after.

By pez on Tuesday, November 13, 2001 - 09:21 pm:

    i got my hair cut almost two weeks ago. i have longish bangs and the rest of it barely brushes my shoulders.

    i do not wash my hair daily because i do not feel like bathing daily. and i do not comb my har because it doesn't tangle easily. it looks messy no matter what i do.

    i do not wear make up and i carry a comb only occasionally. i only look in a mirror if i am in the bathroom because i do not carry mirrors and there aren't any in my bedroom.

    i am wearing old jeans that i wore when i was 1 and haven't been able to fit into in the last couple years. a small, shallow happiness.

By Dani on Tuesday, November 13, 2001 - 10:54 pm:

    But I'll bet your very happy and comfortable and thats all that really matters!
    I'd give anything to wake up one day and not shower or brush my hair. I would save a shit load of time each day. But if were to skip a day, I would have hell to pay the next day trying to get the knots out and the shine back. I'm a freak when it comes to my hair. And God forbid my hair is a mess when my daughter gets home from school. She just puts her hand on her hip and says Jeez Mom, look at your hair. And I'm like well thanks a whole lot and nice to see you too darling daughter. Its quite funny actually.
    Whatever meakes ya happy is all it amounts to.

By dave. on Tuesday, November 13, 2001 - 11:55 pm:

    hair is dead.

By LoneStranger on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 - 12:20 am:

    The snickerdoodles were excellent. I left the commons after 2:00, so they had already started cleaning up, otherwise I would have gaffed a whole bunch to store in the room.

    I will have to do that next time.

    The Ham & Cheese was okay, as were the fries. I got to eat some chicken, brocolli, bamboo and chili paste stirfry. Yum.


By dave. on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 - 01:22 am:

    food is shit.

    shut up.

By Dani on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 - 10:44 am:

    Gotta love Dave's way with words!
    Hair is dead, food is shit, shut up. Your a trip!

By patrick on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 - 11:27 am:

    the incessant need to wash your hair daily and with fluffy fruity smelly products and the subsequent feeling that if you skip a day "there would be hell to pay" is a result of mass marketing. Insisting you NEED to do that crap every day, when in fact you don't.

    pez you sound like a regular hippie! just becareful and not cross the threshold to crusty punk, those guys are a pain in the ass with the most messed up agendas.

By Dani on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 - 11:55 am:

    It's not that I NEED to, it's that I want to. I have always wanted my hair clean and fresh smelling every day. I wish I had the nerve to just go and have it all cut off to make my life alot easier but I like my hair long so I'm stuck with the hassle.
    And I would have hell to pay if I went for a day without brushing my hair because the knots would be atrocious.
    Mass marketing has nothing to do with the fact that I just like my hair shiny clean and smelling pretty.

By patrick on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 - 12:07 pm:

    to think your hair, after a day of not being washed, is not shiny, clean or smelling pretty is a result of marketing...convincing you that if you don't do this everyday you hair will indeed be greasy, dirty and smelly. most shampooing hair products are marketed to women. it seems this is so because women are apparently vulnerable, for reasons beyond me, to products of vanity. Make up, hair products, skin products and so forth. It seems men, according to adverts, only buy razor baldes, gel, and dandruff shampoo.

    Im just not sure what Johnson and Johnson or Vidal Sassoon tells me is good for my hair is really good for my hair. My hair need not smell like strawberries and vanilla creme to be clean day in day out.

    Americans tend to overbathe as it is.

    In short i could give a rats ass about whether you bathe or wash your hair or not.

By Czarina on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 - 12:15 pm:

    I'm into my doo too.Cleanliness is a must. I wear mine kinda wild,but clean,and nothing nests in there.

    Pez,hon,are you on drugs?
    You're not making much sense.
    Bathing is an important ablution.Point blank,if you don't bathe,you'll stink.People will start to notice.They'll start referring to you in unflattering ways.

    "Oooh,there goes stinky girl,with the not combed hair".
    Please reconsider your hygiene routine.

    Are you telling us that you are shrinking? And now fit into clothing you wore when you were one year of age? Something is amiss here. I fear for your sanity.

By Dani on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 - 12:28 pm:

    In short, I could give a rats ass whether you bathe or wash your hair or not too. I was just talking about my preference is all.
    Being that I smoke, nothing grosses me out more than smelling smoke on my own hair so I wash it each day and it makes me feel better. Sometimes even more than once a day.
    I also change my clothes several times a day because I like my clothes smelling fresh and clean too. When I cook, I dont want my shirt smelling like what I just got done cooking. Some people dont care but I do. Dont make me any better or any worse than anyone else. Again, it's a matter of preference.

    Hmmm..I just thought of something...were you "flirting" with me with that little rats ass comment or were you just being your usual nasty dick-head self Patty?
    Ohhhhh wait...it was all just in good fun right? Yeah, I'm sure thats it.

By patrick on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 - 12:36 pm:

    czarina i don't think taking a shower everyday is a necessary either.

    really, we americans are full of ourselves and our bathing habits.

    bathing every otherday is totally sufficient.

    we have jaded ideas of cleanliness here in the states that are encouraged by cleaning product marketing.

    im sure pez doesnt stink at all.

    i often skip a day from taking a shower or bath. my hair actually frizzes and drys out when I wash it daily. cant do that.

    i dont stink. in fact my wife can't stand it when i smell like god damn soap. she likes to smell me, not my laundry detergent, deodorant or soap.

    neurotic american

    mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm shut up dani

By Dani on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 - 12:40 pm:

    Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm never Patty.

By Ophelia on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 - 12:44 pm:

    My hair is dirty blond and thick. It is sort of long, past my shoulders, mid-back-ish. I don't wash it every day. I shower every other day. More than than makes me feel too clean, and since I hate blowdrying my hair I shower at night. I comb my hair rarely, but it doesn't matter because I always wear it back.

    I think that bathing everyday is really over-doing it. You dont really smell unless you go for longer than that, or if you're woking out, or its summer. I shower more often in summer. But usually, I only shower when my hair feels dirty. And I only cut my hair every 20 months or so.

By Ophelia on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 - 12:48 pm:

    (Also, Czarina, I think pez maybe meant size 1, not age 1)

By Czarina on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 - 01:57 pm:

    Stinky Poo Patrick! Stinky Poo Patrick!

By Dougie on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 - 03:23 pm:

    Hmm, that's odd. I have the Farmer's Almanac daily desk calendar, and today's entry is:

    "Better Than Soap: Olive oil is a good skin cleanser for grease, tar, and grimy dirt. Add sugar as an abrasive, if necessary, then rinse."

By droopy on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 - 03:26 pm:

    it used to bother my paternal grandmother that i washed my hair every day. she thought it was bad for you - make your hair fall out or something. maybe it was some irish thing.

    those times i was in the hospital and bedridden for months at a time, they would put cornstarch in my hair to keep it clean. try it - sprinkle it in your hair and let it sit for a while. it sucks out the oil and dirt. then just comb it out. talc works, too.

    i'm not saying it makes your hair look as good as shampoo and water, but it works in a pinch.

By agatha on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 - 04:01 pm:

    my hair looks better when it's dirty.

    fear not, pez is quite tidy. although i don't know where you all came up with that dreadlock rumor, anyhow.

By patrick on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 - 04:14 pm:

    spider asked is she was growing dreds....and the masses went chomping at the bit.

    my hair looks better unwashed too.

    it freaks out when washed and gets all poofy

By Spider on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 - 04:33 pm:

    I wasn't casting aspersions on Pez's hygiene; I was just curious. Anyway, if anyone reading this ever decides to grow dreds, please do not neglect to wash your scalp. Your loved ones will thank you.

    Me, I wash my hair every day except Sunday (to give it a rest), because it's all freaky-wavy and needs to be tamed each morning before I enter into society. I also use John Frieda's excellent relaxing creme on it to make it behave.

By patrick on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 - 05:36 pm:

    ever use that Bed Head goop on your hair? That stuff rocks but its about $20/cannister.

By The Watcher on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 - 05:44 pm:

    "Give me a head with hair. Long beutiful hair...."

    Hair. By the Cowsills. 1960 something.

    Wish I could remember it all. I'll just have to play it tonight.

    I still have well over 95% of my hair. And, very little gray. A heck of a lot better than a lot of the guys I grew up with.

By semillama on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 - 08:02 pm:

    I think you only need to wash everyday if you
    get dirty and sweaty every day. If you don't, you
    can (depending on the amount of BO you
    naturally produce) safely get away with every
    couple of days. For example, I am in the field
    now and I wash every day after I get back to
    the hotel, but on the weekends when I am
    home I don't because I'm not getting dusty
    and sweaty.

By Czarina on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 - 09:04 pm:

    I'm a swamp dweller,so I think I get pretty aromatic.So I bathe daily.

    Also,I think I'm a little predjudiced,when it comes to body odor.It seems that when my patients are in acute psychotic states,they don't bathe,er,for quite awhile.They are pretty rank when we get them.Sometimes its very difficult to get them to bathe.One poor guy was so freaked out,he was incontinent of stool,all over the shower room.It was not a pretty sight.

By semillama on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 - 09:43 pm:

    I miss gee. I want to tell her how we made a
    drinking game of how Canadians speak.

By eri on Wednesday, November 14, 2001 - 10:27 pm:

    I don't was my hair every day. It is too much of a pain. In order to keep the curls under control, it takes a lot of products, and I don't like to use them if I don't have to. Ususally it is a pony tail or a barrette.

    I do bathe every day, but I am constantly running around chasing animals and kids, and I don't like to smell my own BO.

    Right now I have a hair wrap in and I look like a wannabe hippie from the 80's, but its cool. Sometimes silly little things help you feel young. I just don't have the patience or the time for my old rituals anymore. I don't have the money either. I am glad I don't have to go into an office every day anymore.

    I went from literally spending two hours a day on primping, to 5 minutes. Crazy how life changes you, isn't it?!?!?!?!?!

    I just figure, that if anyone wants to see me pretty, then they are just going to have to wait until I am on stage. It isn't as important to me as it used to be. I would prefer people accept me for me and that means, no make-up, hair in a ponytail, midriff top and sweats, but at least I don't have BO.

By moonit on Thursday, November 15, 2001 - 01:24 am:

    I never wear makeup to work. I might put on mascara if I can be arsed, but usually nothing.

    I get glammed up to go out though.

    today i went to work with my hair in pippi longstocking type plaits. cute.

    and i need to adjust that about me thing up there. now i live across the road from my parents.


By Spider on Thursday, November 15, 2001 - 08:52 am:

    Patrick, I have a tin of Bedhead's "Outshine Everyone." It was kind of expensive (the hairdresser talked me into it), so I use it only on special occasions. It makes my hair very soft and shiny.

By eri on Thursday, November 15, 2001 - 02:02 pm:

    Business party at the AFB. I get to get glammed up tonight. See what I get for opening my mouth. I have no idea what to wear and no time to shop and no money to shop with. Ugh. Making a fashion statement stresses me out anymore. I either want to just be my daily self or go all out. I hate this in between (business casual) crap. No jeans, O.K. I don't own any that fit. Slacks would be nice (don't own any of those either). Are you sure I can't wear my leather pants and halter top? This is what I own. I look like Britney Spears in slut mode when I go out (only older and with a smaller waist)I don't have this business casual crap in my wardrobe. You don't find conservative slacks at 5-7-9 and that is about the only place you can find a size 0 or 1 in the midwest (can u tell I hate it here?).

By Czarina on Thursday, November 15, 2001 - 03:45 pm:

    Moonit,what does,"I might put on mascara if I can be arsed", mean?

    I thought "arse" meant "ass".I don't understand.

By Czarina on Thursday, November 15, 2001 - 03:51 pm:

    Eri,email me,I have an idea!

By moonit on Friday, November 16, 2001 - 02:27 am:

    bothered pretty much.

    for some reason arsed seems to have taken over, but you have to say it in a funny accent kind of way.

    arsed arsed arsed or for you assed assed... nah see it looks better with the r

By patrick on Friday, November 16, 2001 - 11:54 am:

    i was reading a super fantastic article in Wallpaper on the subway last night about the innovative Savage Housing Projects in ...Auckland I think....the article went on to describe the surprisingly modernist, nuclear designed apartment bldgs and i thought of you. But as i recall you don't live in Auckland...your are in Wellington.

    mmmmm beef wellington

By moonit on Friday, November 16, 2001 - 04:19 pm:

    no I'm in Christchurch. The mainland (as we south islanders like to call it)

    I haven't heard of those buildings

By TBone on Saturday, November 17, 2001 - 10:54 pm:

    The shampoo-then-conditioner process seems weird to me. Conditioner is dirt adhesive.

    It seems like one's body starts generating less filth when you scale back the washing. Or maybe I just get used to it. But showering once every two or three days is just fine after a short while.

    So, what's longest you've gone without bathing? I've maxed at 1 week. Long backpacking trip. After the first 7 days I hit the lake for a rinse.

By Tom makin the rounds. on Sunday, November 18, 2001 - 01:59 pm:

    When we say dirty hippie, we mean it. I've gone several weeks, at one point or another... probably in college. I didn't really seem to notice my grime and stink until two years ago.

By Czarina on Monday, November 19, 2001 - 12:17 pm:

    I'm an avid hiker,and was frequently out in the field on geology related activities,for extended periods of time.

    But,somehow,I always managed to make sure my tootie at least got a lick and a promise each day.

    Cleanliness is important.

By Hal on Monday, November 19, 2001 - 01:34 pm:

    "...managed to make sure my tootie at least go a lick and a promise each day."

    Czarina... That really frightens me.

By pez on Tuesday, November 20, 2001 - 08:29 pm:


    i wash everything every other day. my face and mouth twice a day. hands after toilet and before touching food.

    no drugs. i don't even drink coffee for heaven's sake. and i still get very nervous about asprin. i got asked to go out for a beer by a coworker last night, but i don't drink.

    but. since moving, my vocabulary as suffered. sometimes i don't make much sense.

    finger-combing is sufficient with my new haircut. it's supposed to be slightly rumpled and over the eyes, as long as it doesn't tangle it's fine.

    dishes are another matter completely. i only eat off clean dishes. and my health? i have period cramps for around one hour, once a month and i sneeze every once in a while. i think i'm okay.

By TBone on Wednesday, November 21, 2001 - 01:10 am:

    I just gave myself a haircut.

    It would have been nice to have a second mirror to see the back.

    Some things are best left to the professionals. Damn.
    But it looked really sweet when I had only done the top and front, but the sides were long and sticking out. Kind-of a balding madman thing.

    Now I probably look like a chemo patient.

By patrick on Wednesday, November 21, 2001 - 11:27 am:

    asprin is reportedly a great preventative of cardiovascular disease.

By semillama on Wednesday, November 21, 2001 - 02:50 pm:

    And it's all natural.

By TBone on Wednesday, November 21, 2001 - 07:36 pm:

    well, it's synthesized now. It was originally extracted from trees or something though.

By pez on Wednesday, November 21, 2001 - 08:19 pm:

    so is soy.

    low cholesterol is another great preventative of cardiovascular disease-- but it is difficult for people to avoid cholesterol entirely.

    there are two kinds of cholesterol, high and low density. the low density cholesterol sticks to vessel walls, high density knocks it off. low density cholesterol is found only in animal products.

    sounds like a good arguement for veganism to me.

By Nate on Thursday, November 22, 2001 - 04:40 am:

    taurine is only found in animal products.
    vegans tend to be unhealthly.

By moo on Thursday, November 22, 2001 - 06:55 am:

    and red bulll

By Platypus on Thursday, November 22, 2001 - 12:58 pm:

    I'm healthy.

By Antigone on Friday, November 23, 2001 - 01:19 am:

    From here: "Adults can produce sulfur-containing taurine from cysteine with the help of pyridoxine, B6. It is possible that if not enough taurine is made in the body, especially if cysteine or B6 is deficient, it might be further required in the diet."

By Nate on Friday, November 23, 2001 - 04:34 am:

    please, tiggy. everyone knows that the body doesn't synth enough taurine. minimal levels, not optimal levels.

By Czarina on Friday, November 23, 2001 - 06:53 am:

    please,everybody,knows that you have a much better chance of meeting your daily requirements of taurine,by injesting fish heads.

    pyridoxine is h20 soluble,and therefore a miriad of environmental factors,can affect its halflife.

By Antigone on Friday, November 23, 2001 - 10:22 am:

    Just thought you were implying we had no taurine unless we ate it from animal products, nateypoo.

By Cz on Friday, November 23, 2001 - 12:04 pm:

    sorry,I was at work and being sassy.

By Antigone on Saturday, November 24, 2001 - 12:07 am:

    fish heads are too crunchy for my tastes.

    I ate a nifty salmon dijon dish at a Belgian restaurant near the Philadelphia art museum tonight. Head was not included.

    Oh, stop!

By semillama on Sunday, November 25, 2001 - 06:56 pm:

    The real reason i have never gone total

    I hate how fucking smug they can be.

    Keep that in mind.

By patrick on Monday, November 26, 2001 - 11:32 am:

    i'll second that sem.

    no vegan i've known looks healthy.

    vegetarian is one thing...vegan is ridiculous in my mind.

By Platypus on Monday, November 26, 2001 - 12:11 pm:

    I look reasonably healthy, but that's because I eat much better than most vegans do, I think.

    Also, being smug tends to get to them after a while...I've never been fond of holier-than-thou anythings, let alone vegetarians.

By droopy on Monday, November 26, 2001 - 12:30 pm:

    The Platypus

    My child, the Duck-billed Platypus
    A sad example sets for us:
    From her we learn how Indecision
    Of character provokes Derision.
    This vacillating Thing, you see,
    Could not decide which she would be,
    Fish, Flesh, or Fowl, and chose all three.
    The scientists were sorely vexed
    To classify her; so perplexed
    Their brains, that they, with Rage at bay,
    Called her a horrid name one day,--
    A name that baffles, frights and shocks us,
    Ornithorhynchus Paradoxus.

    --Oliver Herford

By Cat on Tuesday, November 27, 2001 - 07:52 am:

    And me from the land of the platapii...what chance did I stand?

    I love that poem Droop.

By Platypus on Tuesday, November 27, 2001 - 03:51 pm:

    Yes, thank you...

By agatha on Tuesday, February 5, 2008 - 01:17 pm:

    While we're resuscitating old threads... this is a good one.

By Spider on Tuesday, February 5, 2008 - 02:20 pm:

    Pilate was a librarian?

    So was Nelly, right?

    You can't throw a stone without hitting a librarian around here.

    Not that you'd want to.

    Well, you'd better not.

By agatha on Wednesday, February 6, 2008 - 11:45 am:

    I didn't remember that Pilate was a librarian. Interesting. Yes, Nelly was and still is a librarian. I hadn't noticed the plethora of librarians until you mentioned it.

    More importantly, how did everyone find me on goodreads all of a sudden? Y'all are spooky.

By Nate on Wednesday, February 6, 2008 - 08:13 pm:

    pez initiated me.

    i think it is great.

By Spider on Wednesday, February 6, 2008 - 08:27 pm:

    Me too. I don't know how she found me, but I'm glad.

    I spent all morning adding to my shelf list instead of doing my schoolwork.

By platypus on Wednesday, February 6, 2008 - 10:58 pm:

    Oh God, I just did a Google search for goodreads. I know what I'm doing for the next three hours.

By agatha on Thursday, February 7, 2008 - 12:14 pm:

    It is addictive. I would much rather spend time on there than on myspace or any other crap social software site.

By semillama on Thursday, February 7, 2008 - 01:24 pm:

    god damn you all. there goes my afternoon. Now I must pretend to work.

By la on Thursday, February 7, 2008 - 07:59 pm:

    sorry, my gmail spammed hundreds of people. but i like it.

By platypus on Friday, February 8, 2008 - 01:08 am:

    Speaking of spamming, I didn't really understand the mechanism for adding friends on goodreads since it is retarded, so I apologize to everyone who is about to get three emails from me.


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