There's This Boy Can men and women just be friends?: There's This Boy

By Gee on Wednesday, March 12, 2003 - 03:06 pm:

    and he's nice. and he's not something I'm used to. and I have really bad luck with guys, so I'm not sure how to act/think/feel in this situation.

    I met him like six years ago, on-line. and even though I never go on-line anymore, he calls me often from work because he has free long distance. He lives in Montreal. He came to visit once about five years ago, and I went to visit him last month.

    I always had this teensy feeling that if the two of us lived in the same city there would be Something There, but I didn't pay much attention to it. And last summer he was calling me Every Day and I started to get a crush on him, but then he got in trouble for all the LD calls and it ended.

    anyway, while I was there, I felt Something, and I tried to express it in subtle girly ways, but I'm not so good at that and he didn't seem to notice, so I just went ahead and kissed him. There's a lot more to the story than that, but some things are personal. :) It was all very sweet and romantic, I can assure you.

    I don't know what I'm doing, and I'm not entirely clear on what I'm feeling. I've known the guy for a long time, but I haven't actually been in the same room as him for more than four or so days. I told him to call me in a few days when I left there, but the very next day I missed him so I called him. then I searched my ass off for a nice flat rate long distance from here to there (London Telecom - $25 a month for all the LD I want within Canada!) and I call him every day now.

    He likes me. I can tell. He likes me a lot, and has for some time now. He calls me like five times a day and told all of his friends about me. One time he said to me "My grandmother wants to meet you." Okay, if your granny wants to meet me, then you must have talked about me a Lot.

    He's supposed to come visit me this weekend (weather permitting), and I already have my train tickets to go there for Easter (I get to meet his daddy). He's decided to come back here on May 16th.

    I'm so confused. I like him very much in lots of boy/girl ways, and I know he likes me, and this is all very weird and unusual for me. And I still don't know what we're doing. Is this like dating? Because we haven't actually said anything about that yet. He's coming here this weekend with his roommmate, and we've already established that they'll stay in a bed together while I sleep elsewhere. His choice. also, is it normal that I keep flip-flopping between really happy and really sad every time I talk to him?

    I don't appreaciate long distance relationships. they're not for me. and he's totally long distance. My big rule for guys was No Long Distance Ever, even if they only live an hours or so drive away. but I so love talking to him every day and I'm trying so hard not to get all excited about his maybe coming here on Friday. Can someone explain to me what I'm doing? I don't know how I'm supposed to behave. I've done boy/girl stuff before, but this feels so different.

    I'm getting so carried away. I'm just confused. He's such a genuine guy, you know? I've had guys say nice things to me before, but I was always like "Yeah, that's nice to hear, but I totally don't believe that." When he says stuff like that, I really believe him.

    Not that we're even doing anything right now, but if we were, I'd have to say that our distance is not our biggest problem. Clearly we're interested in each other, but we're both too chicken shit to do anything about it - and That is a major major problem.

    I feel like such a girl. is it weird that it's now 3pm and he hasn't called me once and that makes me very sad? I don't know what I'm doing. I'm used to feeling sad because the boy I want doesn't want me back, but this is practically virgin territory for me.

    I think about things too much. Does anyone have any advice for me? I'm all sad and happy at the same time, and let me tell you it's not a great feeling.

By eri on Wednesday, March 12, 2003 - 03:11 pm:

    If he comes out this weekend talk to him about it and decide together whether you are "friends" or "dating" or "wanting a relationship". I think once the blurred lines are defined you will know what you are getting into and then you will feel better, or at least less confused. You will at least know which direction the two of you want to go in. It doesn't have to be all super serious, but casual clarification so you aren't stuck in limbo wondering what you are doing.

    That would be my advice. All I could think of. Hope it helps.

By wisper on Wednesday, March 12, 2003 - 03:17 pm:

    gee! :)

    ride this rollercoaster of love gee.
    ride it!

    throw those arms up in the air at the top of the hill and cost along. The line was long, the hills are scary. Your hair will get messy. Yes sirree.
    But you'll like it that way.

By kazoo on Wednesday, March 12, 2003 - 04:52 pm:

    hello gee! I missed you!!!

    "Can someone explain to me what I'm doing?"

    Yes, you're falling into the L-hole.
    Your situation sounds all to familiar. I once swore off long distance relationships...I was serious too. That didn't last. See what happens...if it feels different, well then it probably is and there is no use doing the same old thing you've always done.

By patrick on Wednesday, March 12, 2003 - 04:54 pm:


    love hole?

    lubricated hole?

    lush hole?

    lamb hole?

    labia hole?

    my name is patrick, i'll be your server tonight.

By Platypus on Wednesday, March 12, 2003 - 06:30 pm:

    Go for it, Gee.

    There's a cute boy 'round here that I'm kind of digging on right now, too. Spring is in the air.

By Nate on Saturday, March 15, 2003 - 05:15 pm:

    jesus. i don't know about the laws in canada, but you'll do time if you fuck a boy down here in the US of A.

By Gee on Tuesday, March 18, 2003 - 04:53 pm:

    I've decided that we're seeing each other. I informed him of this last night, since he seemed not to realize it, and he agreed by saying "In a sense." Good enough for me!

    I see him again in exactly thirty days.

By kazoo on Tuesday, March 18, 2003 - 04:58 pm:

    "I informed him of this last night"

    good for you!

    "I see him again in exactly thirty days."

    hmmm...that seems to be a coincidence.

By semillama on Wednesday, March 19, 2003 - 12:17 am:

    Why? Are youseeing him in exactly 30 days?


By Nate on Wednesday, March 19, 2003 - 10:03 am:

    give 'em head!

    er, hell.

    give 'em hell!

By Gee on Wednesday, March 19, 2003 - 04:58 pm:

    I'm going there for Easter weekend.

    now it's 29 days.

    he's such a nice guy. What's that about? I get the feeling that he actually respects me. It's nice.

By eri on Wednesday, March 19, 2003 - 05:34 pm:

    Sounds like you are happy about this. All I can say is enjoy it. Have fun. You deserve that.

    My best friend is coming here for easter weekend. It's also the weekend of our birthdays (hers is the day before mine) so we plan on having lots of fun. That and lots of swimming and lots of wine (though not at the same time....maybe).

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