The smell of shit was in the air

sorabji.com: Why did you do it?: The smell of shit was in the air
THIS IS A READ-ONLY ARCHIVE FROM THE SORABJI.COM MESSAGE BOARDS (1995-2016).
By J on Tuesday, January 25, 2000 - 10:44 am:

    After my s/o got pissed about the mailart,we went to radio shack to get an adapter for the microphone I got to talk to Czarina for free,I was pissed off so stayed in the car to stew,he came out empty handed"we,ll get it tomorrow"he said."Right"I said,but I was thinking (go to hell right now and eat some hot fuck on your way).Then we went bowling,to give you an idea of the shape I was yesterday,the day before Sun.,I drank 3 bottles of champange and had several of my Vodka,Irish Cream,and Kahlu'a drinks with out eating all day,woke up feeling not so hot yesterday,didn,t eat then either.So as soon as we walked in the bowling alley I smelled something awful,the toilets had backed up and it was making me heave,we started bowling,I kept telling him the stench was making me sick,he told me "I,d get use to it".I said "I don,think I can,remember the time we hiked Havasupi"?Then he almost puked on the spot,I started laughing as he was dry heaving,he told me to be quiet and not to look at him,I had high game.When we got home I just ignored him.I wish I could fly.

By Czarina on Tuesday, January 25, 2000 - 11:21 am:

    Bowling? And whats nauseating about hiking Havasupi?If he's forcing you to go bowling,its time to do something.Please tell me you don't have matching bowling shirts!

By J on Tuesday, January 25, 2000 - 11:52 am:

    God help me,we do, yellow and black ones,but I,m the one who likes bowling,cause I can smoke and drink there.Remember the year it reached 122 degrees here in July?We hiked down Havasupi,well I didn,t hike I rode a horse down there, a sick and deranged horse(you do remember how most my vacations turn out?).I won,t go into my drama in real life,but a horse is one critter if I never saw another one as I live I,d be happy,blisters on your ass hurts,when they pop it,s worse.I,m a very anal type person,I,ve never shat in a public toilet except once when I got food poisoning at the Jolly Roger by Disneyland.All they had to go potty in was a port-a-potty that you could smell a mile away,every time I tried to use it I was overcome by the fowl stench of shit baking in the desert sun,finally had to wait till dark and find a tree.The day we got out of there was the 122 degree day,I thought I was going to die but also wished I was dead.Remember Czarina,I,m the one who had to go to the hospital for being constipated for 10 days.nothing like being in the emergency room and being given a mayo ennema to make you completely humiliated.

By Czarina on Tuesday, January 25, 2000 - 12:09 pm:

    I'll never forget that episode in your life,Brucifer loves to reenact it.As I recall, weren't you hiding your head under the sheets?
    And J,its come to bowling,and matching shirts,things are much more intense than I originally anticipated."Whatever will we do?"
    Are your names embroidered on your shirts?Just for grins,if you don't think he ever looks at the back of his bowling shirt,why don't you embroider something rude or nasty on there?"I suck dog cock"
    would be cute.

By J on Tuesday, January 25, 2000 - 12:25 pm:

    I,ve sent several annoynomous e-mails to his work today calling him some filthy things,I need to get a grip,I just keep going back and forth between my webtv and the computer,I feel like Barney Fife.

By Czarina on Tuesday, January 25, 2000 - 12:45 pm:

    "J",the above is NOT a good plan.Never fuck with someones work place,its just unethical,no matter how mad you are.Plus it can be traceable.I've said this before,but i'll say it again,there is only one way to handle a fox,out-fox him.You need to be a little more like Czarina,and turn the tables in your favor.It's always better to have the upper hand in these types of situations.Frankly,I've,[and Brucifer,for that matter], have been somewhat suspicious of this Cost Rico trip.Without pissing you off, your s/o is a clever man,but I find him somewhat of an enabler.That makes me very suspicious of his motives.Please tread carefully.I know you've left instructions,but perhaps it would be best if you let HIM know that these instructions are in hands that wouldn't hesitate to bring them forth if nesc.

By J on Tuesday, January 25, 2000 - 12:53 pm:

    I already have,I told him that if anything happens to me there, you and Bruce are calling the cops,the asshole just called me and started on about it again,he guessed I sent it to him,I hung up on him.I,m so mad I,m thinking of taking a taxi to a bar,if I,m going to be in trouble,I might as well do it right.

By Czarina on Tuesday, January 25, 2000 - 01:11 pm:

    Not a good plan-----pull yourself together and THINK.One of my long standing rules is never to make decisions while I'm upset.Think of something constructive you can do.He's a very controlling person,so figure out a way you can take some of that control away from him.You have an extremely bright mind,use it.Going to a bar is simply playing into his hands.And getting snockerd at home is self deprecating.Turn the tables.I don't know what your art package contained that pissed him off so much,but as I recall, he seemed to fit in just fine with the rest of our perverted friends.
    But I do know this,if he comes home and your'e drunk,it will only compound the situation.Pull yourself together,and think why he would have been so upset,forewarned is forearmed,and you can counter any argument if you are PREPARED.

By agatha on Tuesday, January 25, 2000 - 01:45 pm:

    what in the mail art was perverted? i can't think of a single thing, except for maybe swine's condom.

By J on Tuesday, January 25, 2000 - 02:46 pm:

    There was nothing perverted,he,s just being an asshole.The page Cyst sent had a a phone sex advertisement taped on the back,a girl had a dildo in her mouth,big deal.

By The Dinner Lady on Tuesday, January 25, 2000 - 06:30 pm:

    I love bowling. I think you should clock him with your ball next time you're out and say 'it slipped' (as long as it is one of the lighter ones or candlepin ball). Bowling is the sport of the gods. But an unsanitary lane - that is unforgivable. I mean, they make you wear special shoes, they should be more self concious.

By cyst on Tuesday, January 25, 2000 - 09:03 pm:

    oh my god.

    I can't believe I'm an unwitting catalyst for marital strife yet again.

    I'm so tired I just had to ask my roommate, "what's that word for something that triggers a chemical reaction but doesn't actually enter into it?"

    I should probably skip trivia tonight. but I won't.

    j, things will get better between you and your man. please try to be good. I'll be thinking of you, hon.

By J on Wednesday, January 26, 2000 - 08:20 am:

    Cyst,he just wanted to give me shit,so don,t feel bad,it had nothing to do with anything I got in the mail,he just wanted to pull a power trip.He started fucking with the computer and lost our e-mail and I can,t even figure out what he did to things.Dinner Lady,that,s a good idea and it would be so easy to "accidently"do it.

By J on Wednesday, January 26, 2000 - 09:29 am:

    Czarina,I took your advise and took a valium instead,thanks to the kind people here I figured out how to erase,then when he came home from work I had already turned the webtv off and was just watching t.v.. He stopped and got me the microphone I needed to do that phone thing with you on his way home...everything was all good.He went and started messing with the computer and now it,s useless,I cant get my mail up,or do a search or anything,he doesn,t know what he did,at least it wasn,t me that screwed it up:)

By Czarina on Wednesday, January 26, 2000 - 11:03 am:

    J, I'm glad everything went ok.Just be cautious.
    I've gotta go to bed,I just walked in from working last night.Don't be afraid to play with your new computer, the more you mess with it the easier it will become.G'night.

By Patrick on Wednesday, January 26, 2000 - 01:21 pm:

    J, instead of living in his grips regarding the computer, take the time to read up on it yourself (i.e the manual and the "help" files on every software program) and get the knowledge on your own, otherwise he will continue to control you in this way. Maybe he needs the valium to lighten up and be nice.....in fact, just tell him to "be nice".....sometimes when i am being a dick after a bad day or something, my wife just says, patrick "be nice" and that usually brings me back to my usual jolly self,

By MapleLeaf on Wednesday, January 26, 2000 - 01:36 pm:

    Be nice!!!

By J on Wednesday, January 26, 2000 - 04:01 pm:

    I just got it working,I was on the phone with tech support for almost 2 hours.

By Karen on Wednesday, April 23, 2003 - 03:25 pm:

    you are a big freek get over it !!!!!!!!

By Antigone on Wednesday, April 23, 2003 - 04:10 pm:

    I love it when someone stuidly responds to an ancient thread.

    Karen! Babe! Go flagellate your ass with a clue stick!

By J on Thursday, April 24, 2003 - 02:36 am:

    I have cuts of meat and hungry dogs looking for her now.

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