| THIS IS A READ-ONLY ARCHIVE FROM THE SORABJI.COM MESSAGE BOARDS (1995-2016). |
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We both are looking to make more money and she has an opportunity. Its with a French company that manages financial services for the apparel business. They want a west coast rep. Essentially it would be a home-based/small studio/office set up. She would seek out new clients in which to offer the company's services to. She did a phone interview. BANG! Sold them. She did the first face to face interview this week. BANG! She sold them even more in a 2 hour interview. They are totally impressed because A) Shes written a very astute business plan B) She speaks French C) She has managed a successful design line D) She has decent work experience in apparel financing Now the president is coming to LA from France to interview her. She would be required to travel to the French Alps for 2 weeks to train. It all looks really promising. The dilemma is this: Should she reveal shes pregnant? Considering it will be a mostly home-based job it would be ideal for an expectant mother. Of course they cant fire her for being pregnant nor are they allowed to ask it in an interview (i dont think). If she reveals after hire, the backlash could occur in more subtle ways. She could reveal now and they would be totally cool with it, knowing that she wouldnt be out of the loop for more than a few weeks in April/March. Shes not showing yet, but theres the idea of intentional deception thats buggin her to death. Should she tell? Should she wait until she gets the job? Its an ideal job and would totally ease so much worry and tension. thoughts? |
It's one of those things where if the company says "are you preganant," she would say "yes," but should she go out of her way to mention it? I don't know. Maybe she should casually ask if the company thinks preganancy would present any unusual challenges for her? It does seem like something that would be good to mention, just to be upfront about it. I mean, they can't not hire her because she's preggers... |
sure they can. they just dont have to say THATS the reason. |
It's tricky. I don't know. But I will tell you, we had an editor who did all her work (save for the weekly editorial meeting) at home to take care of her children, but she still took a regular maternity leave when she had her babes, and then still had to have a baby sitter for several hours during the day. She may be out of the loop for more than a few weeks. Does she have a sense of the work-load? If she's expected to do 40+ hours at home...that is going to be quite a strain. Christ, I can't imagine. By the way, I was wondering last night if nico was showing. |
Shes still able to wear her jeans but shes having to look at other clothing options. We felt it kicking and squirming the other night...and yesterday at the midwife appt. we heard its heartbeat with a (audio-only) ultra sound...shit what are they called? I assume the work load will be 40+ a week. But to the job scenario....i suppose she could hint at it as you suggest...but thats still enough to potentially scare men from hiring, thinking in the back of their mind shes looking to spawn so she may not be the best option. |
I would say that it might scare some women from hiring too having worked for a corporate manwoman before. Though, she kind of wore that pro-corporate mommie ca-ca as a badge of honor. Never mind me... |
not that you asked that, but i'm going to say it anyhow. she will be out of the loop for a lot longer than a few weeks, you can be sure of that. |
did you work when carrying? |
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i worked up until about two weeks before i was due, full time. i couldn't afford not to. |
Im think more and more that perhaps she should tell them after this next interview and if they still want her, understanding of the time she will need its perhaps a positive sign. |
she should tell them, and then see what happens. |
to even ask if the interviewee is pregnant. Check out this article: http://www.careerjournal.com/jobhunting/interviewing/19971231-washington.html From the article: "Virtually all states have laws or regulations prohibiting discrimination on the basis of race, color, religion, national origin, ancestry, medical condition, physical handicap, marital status and age (40+). Generally, questions on employment applications or in interviews about national origin (including questions about your native language) are illegal. Employers also can't ask your marital status or the number and ages of your children and dependents. Nor can they ask questions about pregnancy, birth-control use or your plans for having children |
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If you know something is going to hinder your work performance within a matter of months be it a prolonged vacation, leave of absence, some sort of surgery or whatever i think its appropriate, courteous and professional to advise your employer. Just because the law says you dont have to tell them doesnt mean you shouldnt. |
BabiesBabiesBabies. My head is spinning just thinking about them. |
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its entirely possible people don't find out they are pregnant until they are 3,4 months into it. She feels thats still an appropriate and fair amount of time. Of course if the job ever becomes too demanding....fuck it. moreover, she reminded me, its a French-based company. Like the Japanese, the French can be fairly patriarchial at times. They tend to be a little more traditional in some aspects, such as family. So she fears her chances would be hindered if she reveals anything. We'll see what happens! |
fuck the french. |
damn. |
unlike your mom, who needs to work on keeping her teeth off my cock when she's down there earning. |
i now know where the L*** family tenet of "fuck the french" comes from. |
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now she's on a fast track to spend two weeks in France, 1 in NYC. Company car, expenses paid etc. The salary is pretty darn healthy. This takes a huge monkey of our back. She figures there isnt any need to tell them until Jan or so. It shouldn't affect her work at all until late Feb, March. In the meantime i will pick up the slack with mille nico. we are marketing the spring 03 collection very soon. its a strong collection. the short term plan is to use this income to pick up the slack with mille nico, provide some temporary relief. Im kinda jealous I wont get to go to France. Im so ready to go back to Europe. But Im seeing my role growing at home. The income with this job is so good i could quit my job and be a stay-at-home dad if need be, but I won't, at least not right away. Do any of you actually know any couples with a stay at home dad? How does it work? Do you sense an underlying sense of resentment from the female perspective? Oh and you can now be assured we will be fucking the french from the inside out now. |
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tell nico congratulations. i hope it works out nicely, it sounds cush. |
if mille nico continues as it is, i have no doubts it will be come a success. each catalog is getting stronger. we ship more and more units with each one. its bound to bust anytime now...so naturally, THATS the ideal, a business that circulates enough money to ditch my job, and rotate our efforts to see to it milkdud is always with one of us. on an entirely unrelated note, read what angry sam sent me to day...i thought this hilarious and sweet: (for those of you who have been here long enough, this should make sense to you) in an email: you know like many bitches and rants and ideas of mine, if only I had a bigger forum than You and Nico, I'd have my own damned talk show by now. Once Milkdud can read, I guess that'll make it three dedicated readers. Although with kids, Milkdud will probably revolt and become a Christian right wing zealot. I can hear it, PAT - "Get that poster of Jesse Helms off your bedroom wall." Milkdud - "But dad, I don't wanna be a punk rock left wing nut. And I wish you and mom would stop doing B.H.'s in front of my church group." |